head spinning, it hurts like it shouldn't that i think what i couldnt when things were begining and you were winning me over, wouldnt it be nice if we could toss the dice and mimic the devices that left us on our knees, fast forward to the ever elusive striaghtforward tease ive become, not in your absense, but from things left undone, words left unsaid hide behind nostolgia that eats away and craves attention in my head, growing with every shared breath in your bed, you think i'm talking about *** and the haunting ghosts of longing thats causing my stalling, preventing the steps i might take in softening the brown eyed mourning, little white lies storming off my mouth because i would hate for you know i love you, not because i ****** you, because i know your dad drives a red truck and survives with you deprived from his life , because i know your mom shoots up in cheers to disputes in your familys broken roots, because everytime i see you i forget everything.

a years worth of memories

nostolgia
a windowsill
in a moving car
i miss you still

your foggy breath
and the heated bus
the suitcases in the trunk
it was just me and you, us

i remember the first night we touched
the concert of beautiful chaotic noise
and how rough your skin felt under my fingertips
the night we hung without your boys

perhaps I see through a pair of rose tinted glasses
but i believed you loved me
although it is only an inaccurate supercut
of what we really used to be

but through it all
i know our moments shared were not wasted
i know now that we are tiny in the grand scheme of things
and i know any future relationship will always be copy and pasted.