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I should be transcribing the story of my life.

Making you laugh at my silliness.
Having you consider
the reality of it all by relating to just you.

Telling that tired anecdote
that's too witty to give up,
but now is a sad catch phrase.

Having a bonding moment
with you over something I probably faked.
I need you to feel not just know
about my trials or tribulations.

I want to have an endearing trait.
I want to know that my noctivagant ways
won't turn you against me.

I'm a traitor, a fool
a sly emotional chameleon.
I am driven by fear,
gears spinning all of me pushing.

Pushing into a deep dark mental ravine.

I am everything you deem wrong
wrong for your world and perception.
No thinking just scheming
what feeling, just planning.

but here it is with masks off
with sound at full bore
images vividly provided
all you can do is consider

why am I
baring this for you...
Nick Jan 2018
Under the Bridge, along the Promenade: we
walked with words trickling through our
waxy lips. Where the Seafront was all silk.
Where the Waxwings, sealed wax tips,
lumbered about the Empyrean yonder:
splayed upon a Canvas
of Sapphire and Azure.
Before the Starry Night has come.
Before we reached the Shore only to
Digress.
    "Liebe verleiht Flügel,"
I heard, or read in a Book.
The Streets are crimson rust;
The Spectators in Sanitariums watched
drab passersby. They shambled and
coughed admixt the crowded room, only
to find the Peristyle vacant and dead.
A Mantic Women, cards of dread,
stands on the corner; our
eyes catched, and She speaks:
    "Wo bist du?"
        "Wo bist du?"
            Louder and fists shaking:
    "Wo bist du?"
The buildings doddered, filled with
Cuscuta.
In Montauk, where we met, now withered,
covered in snow, I stood - my comportment
unsteady. Flashing in the distance I see
Point Light - Captain Kidd musing with his
Money Ponds - an Angel guiding wonderous
blights - The Recognitions, blimey,
Mr. Gaddis has gone blind - The Faustian
apotheosis abound -
The Streets are crimson rust
filled with dread.
Smelling of Jack-by-the-hedge -
I'm walking...
Noctivagant aura permeates -
Mich.

— The End —