"hellbent" poems
Remember, that chaos first was a primordial deity,
Chaos; the nothingness from which all else sprang
headfirst and heartfelt,
half-naked and handsome,
hook, line and... halibut.
All of this,
every measurable moment,
every particle,
every object set forth in motion
sprang from a void so harmoniously
as if the absence of everything was kissed
sudden
by the presence of something.
Often depicted with wings, a bow, and a quiver of arrows,
Cupid, son of Venus - goddess of love,
son of Mercury - god of trade,
his story,
almost identical in Greek and in Roman
mythology,
his story, about a couple of gods
who seem so inherently human by nature,
jolted by jealousy,
dumbstruck by beauty,
hellbent on immortality,
his story has been hallmarked
as red hot velvet rose petal fine wine
and symmetrical hearts.
Wrapped in tin foil red ribbons
bitter-sweetly sugarcoated
dipped in thin layer of chocolate
taste-tested and lover approved.
Remember that scene in Hook
where Tinkerbell leaves her footprints on Peter's chest,
well that's you and that's me--
touch me where my heart beats
because I don't ever wanna be a lost boy.
I wanna grow up like a good bedtime story
with morals
and purpose,
I wanna have meaning.
You might say that Cupid found himself.
You might say that Psyche found her soul.
You might say that Tinkerbell was just faking it--
with the clapping.
Truth is, we can never know the whole story--
the complete truth.
Problem is, we think we can
and act like we do.
So the only time we mean what we say
is the first time we say it,
every utterance thereafter is just an attempt
at recreating a moment.
I love you
is a paraphrase
that deserves three separate ellipses
because there's a lot left unsaid.
I (distinctively remember shadow-boxing with)
love (against a star-dotted sky anchored to a
moonlight so vibrant it can only be compared to)
you (and your tidal waves).
And that's where I fell
headfirst and handsome.
I (was punched-drunk by a kiss so breathless
that it spiked my dopamine to a volume
that can only be described as) love
(in that every time my neurotransmitters feel) you
(they spin themselves dizzy and dance to your science).
There was a moment in the absence of everything
when I was kissed silent by the presence of something.
Hold me to your breastplate.
I don't ever wanna go back to the void.
02/09/2010
Feb 14, 2012
Feb 14, 2012 at 2:03 PM UTC
The hearts and minds of our future selves weld,
And Melt into the ***
It seems hopeless to try,
But I can't seem to stop.
Until Father time says; "My clock will tic but not tock,"
Sorry Doc you can' cure my ailments,
I'm killing myself for you,
But I still feel selfish.
Only if I can hide within myself like a shellfish,
Maybe I wouldn't be so hellbent on understanding this Paradox.
I saw our future before I knew your name.
It pains me to say its presently driving me insane
I try to fight the feeling
Though I can't seem to tame it
Steady holding the gun to your heart
But I can't seem to aim it
Praying for something different
Though I can't seem to change it
I can't seem to change us
Like Love is the game,
And Someone is playing us
Framing us,
For murdering "What could be"
I don't know
If its what should be
Though I have no problem seeing
If what would be perfect.
Could really be perfect.
I may be delusional
Tho, I don't care because I know your worth it
Hallucinations of spending my time
With only you on this Earth.
I can't say if its a blessing or a curse.
At times its the best but,
Most of the time its the worst.
Trying my best to appease you
Until I leave this Earth.
Jun 22, 2014
Jun 22, 2014 at 7:18 PM UTC
The little Prince of Persia
Who's purpose is to depurse ya,
Dispersing suits, clock off time city worker,
Mark your card, inertia.
He's no mathematician or magician
But give him a dynamoment to take you to the cleaners,
cause this one's mean a!
Hellbent on humiliation he'll reverend run you to the station.
He's counting cards, counting on ya till your seeing stars, K.O, ringside seat whilst you get parred, po, poker face he'll drive you gaga!
So Loay and behold he might not be honourable, but he's willing and able to bring the last supper to this table.
He's not called Jack but he's a joker, in guise he tries to choke ya, draw the ace but it won't help ya,
cause you're a disgraced King
and you've just been usurped sir,
by that little Prince of Persia.
Dec 1, 2014
Dec 1, 2014 at 4:44 PM UTC
With our passion all spent they would have us repent our consent
with blind zealotry they refuse to relent opposing our mergence
so when curing prurience leave one percent of passion unspent.
As we share these moments and begin our physical ascent
be aware that they will not capitulate in calling for our penance
with our passion all spent they would have us repent our consent.
Remember this simple covenant in order to circumvent
the condemnation of our actions as unforgivable flagrance
so when curing prurience leave one percent of passion unspent.
In these sheets we have long forgotten the virgin's lament
because the silent weeping is drowned out by our cadence
with our passion all spent they would have us repent our consent.
By our mutual pleasure we have earned their unrelenting resent
and we are endlessly castigated for our lack of temperance
so when curing prurience leave one percent of passion unspent.
The cries of fanatics prove their opposition to be hellbent
they would prefer that we endure the torment of abstinence
with our passion all spent they would have us repent our consent
so when curing prurience leave one percent of passion unspent.
Jan 26, 2012
Jan 26, 2012 at 9:01 PM UTC
Is there someone out there that can make the insecure, secure?
The lost become found?
The weak become strong?
The introvert extrovert and all things in-between?
The ugly more beautiful?
The headedness and nightmares become more of a joke?
The sounds in the background become solid and free
Chuck out the garbage
The ties that bind thee
Those that put you in trouble of the deepest kind
The ugliest of mothers hellbent on revenge
Taking out pennies from someone else's den
Is there someone decent and cool
To help get along in the life of a fool?
I am the pest the irregular verb
Adjectives, hyphens the comma's full stop and nerds
All comprehensive found sometimes expensive
So you'll never know what kind of gift wraps inside
Quaky, Jackie, Stumble bunny and fall
Am running amok for the sake of it all
Sinderella what a fella
He went to the garden zoo
Played hokey cokey
Oh what a jokey
He even drank the soup
Happy Halloween you creeps!
© Bernard M Coldwell all rights reserved
Nov 2, 2013
Nov 2, 2013 at 5:44 AM UTC
All weapons of
the fates you've sealed
Are no match for
this pen I wield
The power to
articulate
Ticking rhyme bombs
to detonate
The conflicts waged
gambling mankind
My perfect hand
is treaties signed
Hellbent hounds pray
like dogs, I hunt
Frontline this notebook
battlefront
With metaphors
of mindless drones
Like similes
to brainwashed clones
Whose C4 booms
and IED's
Can't build bridges
like ABC's
Or tear them down
with death regimes
By rusting through
the war machines
Flamethrowin’ my
verbal grenade
With ****** noun
scorched-earth tirade
On militant
cold-blood elite
King cobras know
I'm packing heat
Seeking missile
resolution
Winged raptor
devolution
Prehistoric
barbarism
Literacy
cataclysm
Stockpiling
extinction bones
We're cavemen carving
fallout stones
My Hiroshima
prose explodes
With nuclear
bushido codes
Released from my
katana's ward
To free my press
from shogun lord
Oppressing haiku
imagery
And samurai
epigraphy
Expressions of
my ronin soul
Omitted by
the daimyo
Satsuma is my
poetry
My final draft's
Nagasaki
Ink cartridges
strapped 'round my neck
I print no charge
or background check
And ****** every
live round free
Of innocent
blood elegy
And killing sprees
of gunned-down news
Domestic violence
black and blues
A Number 2
pencil dependent
Obsolete
lead-head amendment
Open carry
shoots a blank
Empty shell case
at my think tank
So grip this peace
then **** and pull it
**** my diction
write the bullet
Oct 8, 2016
Oct 8, 2016 at 2:10 PM UTC
Goin down
Drowning out the sting
Salt water leaks
Burns like holy water
Not just from the cuts in my skin
In my spit
My eyes
Kept the straight jackets to make my masks
****** stitches, most favored gloss
Demonize pill popping even though it keeps the ******* behind the gates
Those ******* taste horrible with *****
Instead of getting **** faced to forget the artificial praise
Just throw em to the sea
Make sure it's the dead
Sleeping with the fishes and the girl I used to be
Better yet I’ll jump in hoping this is just a dream
Either its me dying in now or waking from vivid nothingness
But will it even be my own bed
His bed
Her bed
What the **** are these stains
Option 3: choking on thread and barfing up empty stomachs and swallowing my pride
Playing with fuckboys like a rejected barbie doll, a hallow head growing rhino horns
One hell of a drug
One hell of a *****
Pitchforks not hot enough to boil off plastic flesh
Next thing to bleach are the eyes
Can’t stand her disappointed eyes
My eyes
Hellbent *****
Reflecting vanity in broken glass
What the point for a window with no soul
Divine Frankiestien
That's monster I’ve become
No
The monster they made me to be
Jun 29, 2016
Jun 29, 2016 at 10:01 PM UTC
Don't trust the girl with the blades in her hand
The cuts on her wrists
That you'll never understand
She's got stacks of bracelets
But don't be fooled
She'll cut you into pieces
And make you cry like you're in preschool
Don't trust the girl who tells you she's done
She'll rip out your feelings
One by one
She'll blow up
And display her wrath
You won't survive the aftermath
She's not planning on coming back
Don't get close or else you'll crack
She will always be hellbent
On killing herself
Leaving your heart with a dent
So don't trust the girl with the blades in her hand
Tell her why
And she'll understand.
Dec 3, 2014
Dec 3, 2014 at 2:10 AM UTC
Night appears in an avatar
of a sweet chaperon,
coming with a lovely dark gown
to dress the shy, blushing evening
cajoling her for a slow make over,
she implies, it's better letting
the will of darkness prevail.
Now she is a perfect charmer
night, lets her long dark tresses
loose, that flows in waves
down through her back and
caresses her rotund proud buttocks,
adding to her silent grandeur,
till the next spectacular day breaks.
Night is an ace temptress
with full moon at her side
as an irresistible magical charm
to sway even nature, catch
the sea in her net,
of attraction and makes it dance,
bewitching night makes
the stars in her coiffure gleam.
Night is an agile courtesan,
having royal patronage,
eyeing you wistfully,
hellbent upon her this day's conquest,
her amatory skills one can tell
will be kinky,she is classy nevertheless.
In her boudoir, women are salacious,
hungry men too dance to her tunes,
what you gain after a spirited
amorous duel, is the gift of dark eyed night.
Mar 29, 2016
Mar 29, 2016 at 6:51 AM UTC
What drives men to do such terrible things?
Am I exempt from such a judgment?
From chaos given and innocence stolen
This world is hellbent
On suffering,
One writes
to be left
On misery
one night
is enough
On loneliness
Oh, how I greet it
With open palms raised to the sky
Tonight is a fine night to die
My belly full of pills
Only prescribed
By men and women
Garnished in white
Oh, this will help me sleep
with kings and counselors
For if you look too long,
bloodshot eyes,
The abyss will grab you from your home
Ode to joy
Hallowed be thy name
My eyes burn as I grip this pencil
And an odd smell lingers in this room
The smell of sterilization.
The smell of cleanliness.
The smell of godliness.
It's far too white here
It's far too bright, I fear
I fear for these students
Fellow and brave
Taking this test
While I'm painting my cave
My cave is solitude and I have picked it out from it's mountain
Rocks fell soon thereafter
Now I cannot leave
This was my choice
But I have one regret
I wish I could have stood still
and been crushed to my death
Much like Giles Corey
I am a sinner
More weight, he cried out
From his pressing board
And much like me, his please were ignored
What drives man to do such terrible things?
Passion, my friend
The same passion for which
I sing
Oct 2, 2013
Oct 2, 2013 at 11:25 PM UTC
dreaming for her wild
curvy moonlight flesh, hellbent
his touches consume
water rides across her lips
eyes obey dripping but dead
Mar 10, 2014
Mar 10, 2014 at 10:54 AM UTC
Easy answer to a simple problem
Raise my hands and scratch the **** thing
But then again, why should I have to?
Why must I immediately raise my hands to scratch my itchy nose?
Is it because the itch is caused by a parasitic alien?
Hellbent in destroying my body by tickling my prickly nose hairs?
And thus if I scratch my nose I would rid myself of said parasite?
No no no, the idea of such a thing is of the utmost absurdity
The most logical answer is that I must rid myself of discomfort
Discomfort: Quite a word indeed to one that lives well
Where I can sit comfortably on a couch in an air conditioned house
And I can still find something that causes discomfort
Perhaps after I rid myself of this infernal discomfort
I shall go to the kitchen and make myself a lovely roast
With some scallion potatoes on the side with green beans
And then rub uncomfortably on the chair because my ******* itches
Jun 4, 2016
Jun 4, 2016 at 12:34 AM UTC
Woke up from the American Dream
Hungover
Hellbent on reality
After I saw the worst minds of my generation
Destroy with their madness
Rather than exploit their demons
They shot them in the heart with anti-depressants
and let them wake up
dead to ambition
They prescribed me like you
Withdrawal made me like me
GOD MODE ON
Just reach for the sun we're touched by
Fire in the mind.
Controlled flame
I am American Madness
Mommy's little monster gone manic
Mood swinging from the right intentions
I am American Madness
Jumping this shark with the high horse I rode in on
Saving my country from soapbox to soapbox
I am American Madness
The revolution in our minds manifested
standing up for something un-televised
The psychos in sheep clothing
Lycanthropy at the right time
Letting out our own Howl
Standing present
Our hands are red white and blue in guilt.
With the ghosts that we're dragging from past lives
Tearing the throat out of
the things we can run
but can't hide
Fighting off our demons
Transmuting the nightmares
Caught in the American dream catcher.
We could be the champions of the oppressed
Crossing the first threshold
We all come back around together
© kenHeike, 2k13
Aug 3, 2013
Aug 3, 2013 at 3:53 PM UTC
once upon a time I commited a sin
only it wasn't one you'd ever heard of
my sin was so great
they invented a name for it
and it became my heirloom
passed generation
to generation
a curse for all to recognize
it burned my soul away
and cleansed me of any good
left me to wander unconcerned
with whether I could be absolved
now I'm a jealous wraith
hellbent on serving justice
Aug 12, 2014
Aug 12, 2014 at 1:08 AM UTC
"Coming up on emptiness straight
ahead"...(you say to yourself)--
strange...the driver and driven
to point out emptiness.
Where does it begin, where does
it end?
Mind like a windshield illumined
by headlights...hellbent on
demystifying emptiness--plying
the road's will toward a name, and
a place.
Night...dark...emptiness behaving
as a metaphysical digestive system--
driver asking: "where to?"...
passenger answering: "straight ahead."
This could go on forever can't it?
Mind like a windshield illumined by
headlights...hellbent on demystifying
emptiness--plying the road's will
toward a name, and a place.
Note to Self: the driver, and the driven
are one.
Aug 16, 2016
Aug 16, 2016 at 11:58 AM UTC
Where do I begin.
It's been so long since I've been so close to the end that I could smell the earth around me.
I think I've been playing both sides of the field so long that I can't differentiate between a graveyard shift,
and a cold dead sunrise. But I wouldn't know the difference between differentiating and diffusing dreaming
Dead dawn rises opening up this world
Dead dusk down on a twitch throe, circling the fence around my collapsing line of vision
Sorrow and *** the two things I like best that I want less of the more that I get.
If I could go back...I would have kissed you on the river. I would have shown you with tenderness, what it is like for your life here on this world to be wanted. I would have given you what love feels like beyond the shade of fear of loss, the ultimate gift I would keep on giving. And then I would've stricken you with my oar until your beautiful body no longer broke surface intentionally. It would have been the gentleman's way of settling things. Instead I chose the dreamer's.
I've been in camouflage, hiding well from you. hoping to escape within the community of a seemingly functional
system.
Found it hard to keep my cool when utterance of a simple name or phrase could throw me into breathing lasps,
When the sight of a single stone upon the ground could be a city in the sky, my last gasps are playing and
rewinding and then playing, and rewinding, and then playing, and rewinding and then playing, and rewinding and I'm laying down the sheets upon the floor, because the bed reminds me too much of the perfect story memory I'm
alone. In a
building. In a
desert. In a
deadlocked staring contest between me
and my reflection in the moonlit water memories that make up all I am were was are is will ever ******* be
If you can't escape in a ******* dream then where the **** else am I gonna go?
I've wasted my life, observing, becoming less a part of all the things I spend time looking at.
Removing myself from the final edit. Hoping somehow,
That total abstinence,
From your world,
And my worldly desires,
Will
somehow
put Me in
CONTROL.
Love is about control for you. I believe in you.
I don't know if I believe in control.
It doesn't matter if I believe in love.
Someone please just see the justification for anything I do. I am begging for a partner. I have no one to observe
me.
If I seem hellbent, please...I am merely driven by demons to an end I would have no means to reach if I was...
left alone...
Oct 3, 2011
Oct 3, 2011 at 5:41 AM UTC
**Faulty was that one who said
Our life is on the line
I'll stay until the day does dawn
No apprehension ever will spawn**
*That day was hellbent
At arriving precisely on time
Checked its wristwatch twice a jiff
And stretched its bulging spine*
**He knew about his upcoming service
Ah! But he didn't commit
I stay in victory, drunk of absinthe
Let alone the clutches of a ******
*Rapture called when I wasn't listening.
Rapture wants the cash I had taken
Rapture took away my identity
For happiness is an embezzled entity*
**I pity anyone at all
Without the nerve to live
If you don't believe in anything at all
You'll never acquire true pith.**
*The exactitude of my expectation
Should not have vexed my reaction
I expected it. I saw of life's dark truth
I knew I'd pay in full.*
Aug 30, 2014
Aug 30, 2014 at 11:20 PM UTC
Well I'm ridin through the crossroads
on a midnight jet black horse,
got my pistol cocked and my sabre sheathed
,but loosely as a matter of course-
In the past I could let my guard down,
but Tonight I must not fail,
I'm like Jonah riding in the belly of the beast
while Ahab takes aim at the whale,
screaming from Hells heart I stab at thee for hate I spit my last breath
but tonight's my night
the coin's just took flight will it be life or endless death?,
I'm a wanted man with a blackened name,
and the hunter's have my scent,
but it's my one true love who I've got to save,
so on her rescue I'm Hellbent.
And the hell in there is not a turn of phrase,
she's in the grip of Satan's kin,
and if silver and steel can't save her soul,
I'll trade my own straight in.
because Sweet Alice always warned me
'bout the company I kept,
but I ignored her wisdom and for my sins,
she was taken while I slept,
by a Hell spawned demon creature
straight from Lucifer's darkest dream,
and her sob of fear is all I could hear,
now I'm haunted by that scream,
and for 11 years I've faced all my fears
on an evil infested trail,
a Witch woman omen caster told me I could save her with the holy grail.
I turn to see the demon following me
thru the gloom and misty hail,
and for the thousandth time I curse my oath to quest for the holy grail,
but Sweet Alice needs me to be strong,
and so I must not fail,
to face hell's hordes and save her soul I must find the holy grail
Apr 9, 2016
Apr 9, 2016 at 7:15 PM UTC
I've been thinking lately
That not everything is correctly
Thought over or treasured
Stuck in the endeavored
Nine to five schedule
That most claim is the devil
And can't seem to think
That there's more than ink
On a paycheck
Or a car wreck
We convince ourselves
To put feelings on shelves
And disregard all
That don't fall
Right into place
Right in our face
And keep us from working
Or keep us lurking
Around for a better us
Longer than we fuss
Or believe we must
Stuck in our lust
From clubs and dancing
To money and prancing
Pretending we're better
Than those who write a letter
Out of hopes to reach someone
And get help for what we've done
I hope we wake up
And fill our cup
With hope and happiness
With fun and a happy dance
Rather than judgement
And being hellbent
On being hateful
Be joyful
And live.
Sep 18, 2013
Sep 18, 2013 at 9:34 PM UTC
Please don't tell me
that you've always been in love
with me and that you will always
have these feelings for me
I don't buy that
Please don't call me
at 4am with heart
felt messages in a
drunken state
I won't buy that
Please don't chase me
when I run away from
you, when I desert you
halfway through dinner and
scream hellbent 'I love
you's' at me across the street
I shan't buy that
Please do
understand,
that I am faithful to
no-one, that I
am capable of
nothing, save destruction
and that I do not buy
into the ideals of love,
into anything more than
***** fuelled hook-ups
and faible, fiery passion.
Aug 4, 2014
Aug 4, 2014 at 8:09 PM UTC
reality television
doesn’t just sell a vision
it crawls & squirms like
disease-ridden worms
contracted through the eyes
to terrorize the temples
of self & hope, pushing us down
this precipitous slope of
cannibalization feeding on
station after station & projecting
its virus to every nation
**LOOK@ME
LOOK@ME**
why?
what ever have you done
beyond sell your being to
the vultures circling the
stumbling corpse of dignity
cackling in the sunny waste
at our utter lack in taste
eroded by the steady stream
of soulless visions hellbent on
sowing never-ending divisions
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH
but it’s never enough
because the machine is lubed
& cheap to boot, all the better
for the execs collecting loot
thus the only prescription
is to denounce this fiction
with the utmost conviction
and step back into
reality.
Mar 13, 2011
Mar 13, 2011 at 1:33 PM UTC
#
*Cloud-scraped and smoldering..
(Scepters have handles,
not every hand can fit)
Dream-scenes, on fleshscreens
by far, burn the brightest..
But;
Panty-lines in quartertimes
best accentuate--
Those wine-goblet, ****
(My head is spinning;
hellbent, on sinning..)*
. . . .
*Evil Impulse, brings me close
(you have a gift, my Love)
Rise above, Paul..
Rise above
Rise above
Rise above
Rise above
Rise above.*
#
Aug 8, 2023
Aug 8, 2023 at 5:24 PM UTC