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"haw" poems
_~a jump-rope chant~_ Black silk handkerchief, what ya’ gonna’ hide? A pox that knocks on the church’s side. Preacher won’t preach where my daddy died. Angel forgot which soul to guide. Both arms wrapped in moccasin skin, open the gate and let her in! Snake-bone hag with watery eyes, count to ten when the baby cries. One for the moon, and two for sin, three for the teeth with the rusted grin. Four for the girl with the copper cough, dancin' in the attic with the light turned off. Five, six, skillet ticks. Seven, eight, shut the gate! Nine, ten, count again-- bathe him slow and cool the skin. held him close till the fever broke; air curled white from pinewood smoke. Chewed the haw and bit the sage, wrapped his bottle in a bible page. Ghost stood watch on the porch out back, shadow thin and eyes coal-black. Sayin', "I’m fine, don’t mind the cold," "died last spring but ain’t been told."
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Oct 5, 2025
Oct 5, 2025 at 3:52 PM UTC
Copper Cough Charm
a haw and saw. a thorn. fruit: it is ecstasy never bit and undeniable. you slurp—a cat licking its paws ruby and clear. moth and cloud drape over fruit, make up sparkling nectar. love is sickening. you spend five dollars on a rose at a bar for a girl you will never see again. she will take the flower and throw it in the trash outside with the hundreds of other roses. no matter. they have fruit, and fruit concludes. it is life cut with claws. their beauty, seemingly to be always in the clusters above. **** you, rose. **** your dew.* they seem to say. that’s when the light hits and microbial bleeds to miss ruby. JAZZ! at night retrains beauty, makes it edible. the rose, changing the color of its dew—black pearl in this drape of mystery-shaped night.
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Jul 15, 2017
Jul 15, 2017 at 12:49 PM UTC
a rose changes the colors of its dew
Memaw & Pepaw ..Mason Dixon Saturday night, Just sippin' muscadine wine by the Tennessee moonlight Rockin' chairs...Zenith Black and White Roy, Buck, Minnie Pearl a Hee Haw delight. Crickets a chirpin' and a Frogs a croakin' Toe tapin' rhythm's got em all in motion. Corn fields swaying like a metronome Watching those two dance to cotton eye Joe! Sunday mornings best at the Church of Christ, Me, I'm Thinkin' bout Memaws country gravy, my fav-o-rite! Fried Chicken, taters, eggs sunny side right, These are the memories I like to recite.
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Jun 5, 2016
Jun 5, 2016 at 12:19 PM UTC
An Evening with Cecil & Drewetta
#STICK’EM UP with LIQUID NAILS DANGER ! EXTREMELY FLAMMABLE         See Other Caution on Back Panel: I’m hot for you Cowgirl – you’re so flammable my glue-gun starts to melt; my screwdriver starts twisting when you loosen that low-slung belt. You make me feel like laying re-bar in a freshly-poured foundation. Shoot me up with that caulk gun baby – I need you like salvation. Ten and one-half fluid ounces – pull off your top, pop a love-cap in me. Fingerin’ your trigger while the job is gettin’ bigger so take me for a ride to the hardware store, honey, cause I’m seeing red and feeling white on your golden background’s sheer delight.  Hammer me a heart-full, spike me on a cross of blonde, I’m hanging ten, surfing the tube of your magic wand. I’ve been in love ever since I first waterproofed my seamy undersides with you… stand over me in those red, red boots, you Liquid Nails Girl – and from your pure white Stetson let righteousness unfurl. You won the shoot-out long before you even drew, my dear. Lost hope of the Wild West, Final Frontal Feminine Frontier – there’s only one side of you…  your GOOD side.  Just one look and your fearless gaze silences the foes, my blooming prairie rose. YEE – HAW !  Be my angel, be my dream, my valentine rodeo queen, be my bodyguard, my therapist, long & tall & hard & wet – be my Liquid Nails Girl forever and I’ll ride right into your sunset…
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Sep 10, 2015
Sep 10, 2015 at 9:28 PM UTC
Owed to a Caulk Gun
Tonights the night to party Not just because I say Tonights the night to party Because it ' s the ending of the day Throw up your hands and yell yee haw Grab a drink and hit the floor Dancing without caring That's what this party's for The band is slightly out of tune But, hey who gives a **** They sound better later on When you are really lit By two a.m you'd think that they Were Alabama and  George Jones While you're trying to record them on Your prissy little phones This place don't karaoke You're singing with the band You're singing country music It's the best in all the land No running shoes, just cowboy boots Will get you in the door If you come in with a cowboy hat Make sure it faces to the front All the dude's they wear them backwards And they look like a dumb c*** Tonights the night to party Not just because I say Tonights the night to party Because it ' s the ending of the day Throw up your hands and yell yee haw Grab a drink and hit the floor Dancing without caring That's what this party's for You can listen for the steel guitar It's there in every song Hey man, this here's a country bar And steel guitar , it just belongs There's always background fiddle Drums like Levon from The Band Piano played like Jerry Lee The floor's all blood and sand You've come on out to party Now show them how a redneck does Knock back a few and get up here And when you dance, you cuss The music here will rock you It's American through and through It's a good old country party It's all red white and blue
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Aug 8, 2013
Aug 8, 2013 at 8:53 PM UTC
Country Party
Tonights the night to party Not just because I say Tonights the night to party Because it ' s the ending of the day Throw up your hands and yell yee haw Grab a drink and hit the floor Dancing without caring That's what this party's for The band is slightly out of tune But, hey who gives a **** They sound better later on When you are really lit By two a.m you'd think that they Were Alabama and  George Jones While you're trying to record them on Your prissy little phones This place don't karaoke You're singing with the band You're singing country music It's the best in all the land No running shoes, just cowboy boots Will get you in the door If you come in with a cowboy hat Make sure it faces to the front All the dude's they wear them backwards And they look like a dumb c*** Tonights the night to party Not just because I say Tonights the night to party Because it ' s the ending of the day Throw up your hands and yell yee haw Grab a drink and hit the floor Dancing without caring That's what this party's for You can listen for the steel guitar It's there in every song Hey man, this here's a country bar And steel guitar , it just belongs There's always background fiddle Drums like Levon from The Band Piano played like Jerry Lee The floor's all blood and sand You've come on out to party Now show them how a redneck does Knock back a few and get up here And when you dance, you cuss The music here will rock you It's American through and through It's a good old country party It's all red white and blue
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52
*Yee hee hee hee haw ha ha ha ha ha the old Laughing Santa wished íFeliz Navidad! with his eight little reindeers, carrying the sleigh he came swiftly, flying our way sleigh bells ringing, whooshing through the snow his sturdy little reindeers, rushed in a row Dasher, Dancer, Prancer and ***** Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen they swoosh and crash and dash and scoot they bolt so fast, and look so cute children singing and dancing with joy as he showers some glitters of happiness in sky It's an occasion of celebration there's no room for sadness let's spread the joy by doing a random act of kindness Yee hee hee hee haw ha ha ha ha ha the old Laughing Santa wished íFeliz Navidad!*
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Dec 21, 2014
Dec 21, 2014 at 2:20 AM UTC
íFeliz Navidad!
When Abraham Lincoln was shoveled into the tombs, he forgot the copperheads and the assassin... in the dust, in the cool tombs. And Ulysses Grant lost all thought of con men and Wall Street, cash and collateral turned ashes... in the dust, in the cool tombs. Pocahontas' body, lovely as a poplar, sweet as a red haw in November or a pawpaw in May, did she wonder? does she remember?... in the dust, in the cool tombs? Take any streetful of people buying clothes and groceries, cheering a hero or throwing confetti and blowing tin horns... tell me if the lovers are losers... tell me if any get more than the lovers... in the dust... in the cool tombs.
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6k
Cool Tombs
This Ain't a ******* Country Song You know I love my Rock and Roll I wouldn't write a Country Song 'Cause that's not how I roll This song it ain't bout country things Like pickup trucks and cars You'll never find me writing About getting drunk in bars There's no mention here of Taylor Swift or The Charlie Daniels Band I wouldn't write of how the banks are taking our farmland This Ain't a ******* Country Song You know I love my Rock and Roll I wouldn't write a Country Song 'Cause that's not how I roll I don't know **** 'bout Redneck stuff like hunting dogs and guns I wouldn't write of Daisy Dukes showing off some hot babes buns I won't write 'bout the Opry I don't know all that stuff Of Minnie Pearl and Grandpa Jones And Mr. Roy Acuff This Ain't a ******* Country Song You know I love my Rock and Roll I wouldn't write a Country Song 'Cause that's not how I roll There's nothing here 'bout Bourbon or of Racing through the fields I don't know much about farming or crop futures or of yields I listen to The Rolling Stones Trace Adkins I don't like Lady A can go away Kid Rock can ride his bike You won't hear much about Zac Browns Band or of food thats Chicken Fried I might go to a hoedown If I'd  just  up and died My music, it fulfills me It makes me who I am But I'll stay away from country songs, Cause I don't give a **** No Oak Ridge Boys or Hee Haw Here Hank Williams I won't buy I'll never buy a Dixie Beer It's a drink I'll never try I won't sing about Kentucky or of a Texas Yellow Rose you know this aint no country song Good god I hope it shows There's no mohter, dogs or applie pie no  fishin' in the dark No Everything is Beautiful No songs by Terry Clark I'm really open minded My friends they are the same We won't buy country music To us it's just so lame This Ain't a ******* Country Song You know I love my Rock and Roll I wouldn't write a Country Song 'Cause that's not how I roll I won't mention stuff you'll find in songs by Nashville bands There's nothing here about watching football in the stands I'll never write a country song Cause country just ain't fun Oh crap I just read this thing And I think I just wrote one This Ain't a ******* Country Song You know I love my Rock and Roll I wouldn't write a Country Song 'Cause that's not how I roll
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May 4, 2012
May 4, 2012 at 10:33 AM UTC
This Ain't A ****** Country Song
This Ain't a ******* Country Song You know I love my Rock and Roll I wouldn't write a Country Song 'Cause that's not how I roll This song it ain't bout country things Like pickup trucks and cars You'll never find me writing About getting drunk in bars There's no mention here of Taylor Swift or The Charlie Daniels Band I wouldn't write of how the banks are taking our farmland This Ain't a ******* Country Song You know I love my Rock and Roll I wouldn't write a Country Song 'Cause that's not how I roll I don't know **** 'bout Redneck stuff like hunting dogs and guns I wouldn't write of Daisy Dukes showing off some hot babes buns I won't write 'bout the Opry I don't know all that stuff Of Minnie Pearl and Grandpa Jones And Mr. Roy Acuff This Ain't a ******* Country Song You know I love my Rock and Roll I wouldn't write a Country Song 'Cause that's not how I roll There's nothing here 'bout Bourbon or of Racing through the fields I don't know much about farming or crop futures or of yields I listen to The Rolling Stones Trace Adkins I don't like Lady A can go away Kid Rock can ride his bike You won't hear much about Zac Browns Band or of food thats Chicken Fried I might go to a hoedown If I'd  just  up and died My music, it fulfills me It makes me who I am But I'll stay away from country songs, Cause I don't give a **** No Oak Ridge Boys or Hee Haw Here Hank Williams I won't buy I'll never buy a Dixie Beer It's a drink I'll never try I won't sing about Kentucky or of a Texas Yellow Rose you know this aint no country song Good god I hope it shows There's no mohter, dogs or applie pie no  fishin' in the dark No Everything is Beautiful No songs by Terry Clark I'm really open minded My friends they are the same We won't buy country music To us it's just so lame This Ain't a ******* Country Song You know I love my Rock and Roll I wouldn't write a Country Song 'Cause that's not how I roll I won't mention stuff you'll find in songs by Nashville bands There's nothing here about watching football in the stands I'll never write a country song Cause country just ain't fun Oh crap I just read this thing And I think I just wrote one This Ain't a ******* Country Song You know I love my Rock and Roll I wouldn't write a Country Song 'Cause that's not how I roll
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76
There's a contentious subsection Of the homosexual community That go in a different direction Hoping to find social immunity The word masculine Is the mask they're in To live life saccharine Wearing a plastic grin From the sensation Of over-compensation Actuating placation To differentiate From the effeminate They say they're separate But really they're just desperate To be accepted By their own dejectors To not be rejected They become defectors To avoid ridicule They stack their deck with nothing but physicality Their mind minuscule The albatross on their neck is a lack of personality To please those that compare them to ********** Internalizing their homophobia An infernal mighty cornucopia Creating an over abundance of rules One must follow to be a proper male But we should jump out of the pool If being miserable is what that entails The more genuine version we see The happier we all should be Then we might all be free But if I were to show glee Someone might call me a ****** And I don't think I could hack it When the rest of society backs it With an approval that is tacit So I convince myself I'm avoiding identity politics Using total discretion To make no impression But my friends and family would know that's not what I'm doing So why not tell them? I haw and I hem Because the underlying ghostly shame Is the true nature of this social game When you have the fame of the flame You're told to get in a lane of the same Erase my ******* sin With the title masculine There are practical reasons to hide it But how much time will be bided? Will my life be derided Until the evil are delighted?
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Jul 16, 2018
Jul 16, 2018 at 12:58 AM UTC
Masculine
There's a contentious subsection Of the homosexual community That go in a different direction Hoping to find social immunity The word masculine Is the mask they're in To live life saccharine Wearing a plastic grin From the sensation Of over-compensation Actuating placation To differentiate From the effeminate They say they're separate But really they're just desperate To be accepted By their own dejectors To not be rejected They become defectors To avoid ridicule They stack their deck with nothing but physicality Their mind minuscule The albatross on their neck is a lack of personality To please those that compare them to ********** Internalizing their homophobia An infernal mighty cornucopia Creating an over abundance of rules One must follow to be a proper male But we should jump out of the pool If being miserable is what that entails The more genuine version we see The happier we all should be Then we might all be free But if I were to show glee Someone might call me a ****** And I don't think I could hack it When the rest of society backs it With an approval that is tacit So I convince myself I'm avoiding identity politics Using total discretion To make no impression But my friends and family would know that's not what I'm doing So why not tell them? I haw and I hem Because the underlying ghostly shame Is the true nature of this social game When you have the fame of the flame You're told to get in a lane of the same Erase my ******* sin With the title masculine There are practical reasons to hide it But how much time will be bided? Will my life be derided Until the evil are delighted?
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54
Haw! Rush to the brink of it all and bloop! They who went first nod along knowing the same the same song before it went dark and light combust, on the shore there was a shadow standing thus. Hurry to the buoy and rippttt! Frosty whirls consume like cream over coffee beans when it the only the sweet crystals that remain at the bottom of the mug. One two three and freeeee! Now see that treasure chest folded in ivy and barnacles still green in stench but precious for it is now hollow and willing to be full.
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Nov 8, 2012
Nov 8, 2012 at 4:31 AM UTC
Learning to Swim
Baby, have you ever thought Of the moment when we meet again ? Maybe you'll enjoy my company, maybe not, At least in my heart there'll be no rain. It may be on a stormy Sunday, Another love at first sight, like a lightning strike, Or it might be in the pretty month of May, Under the sun, a field full of flowers, riding bikes. I don't know what will happen The day we meet again, I only know I'll be speechless, breathless, frozen, I'll hem and haw, like when I was ten. Can't know if it's been through your mind, Have you ever thought about that ? I can picture the moment a thousand times I can feel it in my heart. Look, I'm not saying it will be magical 'Cause we're humans ; humans make mistakes, At worst I'll drown you in alcohol, So you don't remember me when you awake. Hey I know I haven't been the perfect girlfriend, Took me 6 months to realise. But I don't want our story to end, I'll work it out. I swear I won't try anything, Holding my love back is what I do best But if I may promise something : If you tempt me, I'll do the rest. Who said I wanted another chance ? I never even dare to think about it, All I can do is ask for a dance And see you smile with your eyes lit. Just seeing you. Oh, my. That moment. Can't imagine it. Just seeing your face after all I've been through. That's my reward for all the time I've waited. I am not expecting anything from you. I'm just like, hey, long time no see. I know the subject of "us" is taboo, I just wanna make sure you're happy.
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Dec 19, 2012
Dec 19, 2012 at 9:24 AM UTC
When we meet again
Baby, have you ever thought Of the moment when we meet again ? Maybe you'll enjoy my company, maybe not, At least in my heart there'll be no rain. It may be on a stormy Sunday, Another love at first sight, like a lightning strike, Or it might be in the pretty month of May, Under the sun, a field full of flowers, riding bikes. I don't know what will happen The day we meet again, I only know I'll be speechless, breathless, frozen, I'll hem and haw, like when I was ten. Can't know if it's been through your mind, Have you ever thought about that ? I can picture the moment a thousand times I can feel it in my heart. Look, I'm not saying it will be magical 'Cause we're humans ; humans make mistakes, At worst I'll drown you in alcohol, So you don't remember me when you awake. Hey I know I haven't been the perfect girlfriend, Took me 6 months to realise. But I don't want our story to end, I'll work it out. I swear I won't try anything, Holding my love back is what I do best But if I may promise something : If you tempt me, I'll do the rest. Who said I wanted another chance ? I never even dare to think about it, All I can do is ask for a dance And see you smile with your eyes lit. Just seeing you. Oh, my. That moment. Can't imagine it. Just seeing your face after all I've been through. That's my reward for all the time I've waited. I am not expecting anything from you. I'm just like, hey, long time no see. I know the subject of "us" is taboo, I just wanna make sure you're happy.
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40
Saddle up Gurl! It's time to hit the trail, as quietly & gently I spank the pony- tail, & know, it's how I love you, baby.. You'll see me riding like the wind, spurred on by our time & trials ~ that no-one got to win. We were always mining Fools Gold & giggle indulging every sin! Our Poke(h)er hands stayed empty & the music's... long since died. Your sweet songs done, gone & left me (sobs) tumbleweed rolls by Once we prospected forever in this inky ol' ghost town marking spots with X's before a WANTED sign was found and One Moonshine still ain't big en'f 'f both of us to get our quills thirst drowned (hic- cup) "Look West, and to the horizon, see the stage at the edge of town?" My last performance, PRIVATE, snigger to all the wide-eyed boys around Ace-high, on a barebacked filly, play gallerying all my skills I'll slap my thigh & Yee-haw ! riding for them there hills ~Saddled up in the softest leather Chin up!Deep Breath!Chest out! Corseted & brimming, encased in perfume scented lace ~Bat my eyelids for the masses~ I'll find another place. And then you can cut a swell down Main Street, (remember the brothels to your right) keep your low slung loaded though, for it's no place to start a fight cos just outside that swing (ing) door, the coffin maker winks at such a cheerful sight, stood grimacing in his top hat, grasping 13 nails tight. & I'm sure you'll measure up darling blowing rubied kisses as I bid mine own true-love's heart goodnight. ***HiHO Silver,                                                   away..........!***
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Oct 12, 2012
Oct 12, 2012 at 5:33 PM UTC
That One Trick Pony Express is Coming to Town (Spoken word)
Saddle up Gurl! It's time to hit the trail, as quietly & gently I spank the pony- tail, & know, it's how I love you, baby.. You'll see me riding like the wind, spurred on by our time & trials ~ that no-one got to win. We were always mining Fools Gold & giggle indulging every sin! Our Poke(h)er hands stayed empty & the music's... long since died. Your sweet songs done, gone & left me (sobs) tumbleweed rolls by Once we prospected forever in this inky ol' ghost town marking spots with X's before a WANTED sign was found and One Moonshine still ain't big en'f 'f both of us to get our quills thirst drowned (hic- cup) "Look West, and to the horizon, see the stage at the edge of town?" My last performance, PRIVATE, snigger to all the wide-eyed boys around Ace-high, on a barebacked filly, play gallerying all my skills I'll slap my thigh & Yee-haw ! riding for them there hills ~Saddled up in the softest leather Chin up!Deep Breath!Chest out! Corseted & brimming, encased in perfume scented lace ~Bat my eyelids for the masses~ I'll find another place. And then you can cut a swell down Main Street, (remember the brothels to your right) keep your low slung loaded though, for it's no place to start a fight cos just outside that swing (ing) door, the coffin maker winks at such a cheerful sight, stood grimacing in his top hat, grasping 13 nails tight. & I'm sure you'll measure up darling blowing rubied kisses as I bid mine own true-love's heart goodnight. ***HiHO Silver,                                                   away..........!***
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76
I pierced my septum with a magic bullet. Is Texas really the reason the president’s dead? I’d give anything for a scotch despite never having had one. I loaded my gun with Pall Malls and shot my brother dead in the woods. That son of a ***** is the Able to my Cain, the scissors to my paper. Pap has no son. **** Huckleberry, lying piece of **** I scratched my *** with steel wool. I drew blood, (in pencil haw haw) I’m tired, despite being well-rested. I ****** everyone in Gomorrah over spring break. Add salt to my pillar. And you say I’m ******* immature. Get loaded in Bozeman. I hate that you hate me. The KKK wasn’t this spiteful. Dying on a burning cross, I confess my sins to Richard Dreyfuss and ********* on Judas. He wipes it off with the Shroud of Turin but the streak is still there. I sold my brand and licensing rights for thirty pieces of silver. I ******* came on Judas. I never did anything to you that you didn’t do to me. My dad is bigger than yours. I’d abort myself just to get a reaction. I’m going to hell, but at least I’ll finally eat at the cool kids’ table. I’m done fighting with people I don’t speak to. So how about you just hit me, you just ******* hit me. I’ll launch into whatever the **** I want. I’ll ******* SOAR, like a ********* 747, I’ll **** birds into my engines and spray their guts wherever I please, because I’m finally done being manipulated. **** I don’t think I even started.
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Jan 18, 2013
Jan 18, 2013 at 10:35 AM UTC
Finals
(truck-drivers, bar-boozers, loser-bar yokles, blue-collar rednecks will all love this smash hit song!!!) Rockin country genre "Big Mouth Surgery"       (by david John Clare) (rockin' country drunk hick juke-box mix) Wow!  She sure does talk a lot... could almost cause a riot But we don't get... just what she's trying to say We could hear her fine before... when she used to be quiet Guess all them new school-words get in the way We took her to see... a gypsy-psychic-magician But he wanted more... than we could pay So we took her down to see... our local town physician And here's what old doc... had to say Boys... "She needs Big Mouth Surgery" Her tongue is on the blink She just talks, sqwacks and talks some more 'Cause she don't know how to think So please don't be stallin' Her brain is now corrupt Can't you see that she has fallen' And she just can't ''shut-up!" Big Mouth Surgery Cause no pills seem to work Hurry please now doctor Before she drives us all berserk Big Mouth Surgery But will it work without a doubt? Better make it a lobotomy Before she starts to shout! (solo) Our reputations are expensive While her talk is **** cheap You just can't tell her nothin' 'Cause a secret she can't keep No one seems to know What the fuss is all about We're just waitin' for her brain To catch up with her mouth She needs Big Mouth Surgery Her mind is on the blink She always talks, talks and talks all day Why can't she just please stop & think? So please don't be stallin' Her head is all corrupt Can't you see that she has fallen' Her fat-mouth can't shut-up! Big Mouth Surgery We need to find her a shrink Hurry please there doctor Before she drives us all to drink Big Mouth Surgery She's heard north, east, west & south Who gave her brain a laxative? Got diarrhea of the mouth! Big Mouth Surgery No pill can take effect Hurry please now doctor She is a mental wreck Our minds: she made us loose Her words: just seem to ooze It's so hard: to take a snooze We just drown all-day in ***** Beer, Whisky, Wine & ***** . . . To wash away our ear-ache blues! Yip Yip Zip Lip!  ...Yee Haw! (c) 2009    David Wayne Clare CLAIRVOYANT MUSIC / BMI all rights reserved in perpetuity
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Dec 1, 2014
Dec 1, 2014 at 2:28 AM UTC
Big Mouth Surgery
(truck-drivers, bar-boozers, loser-bar yokles, blue-collar rednecks will all love this smash hit song!!!) Rockin country genre "Big Mouth Surgery"       (by david John Clare) (rockin' country drunk hick juke-box mix) Wow!  She sure does talk a lot... could almost cause a riot But we don't get... just what she's trying to say We could hear her fine before... when she used to be quiet Guess all them new school-words get in the way We took her to see... a gypsy-psychic-magician But he wanted more... than we could pay So we took her down to see... our local town physician And here's what old doc... had to say Boys... "She needs Big Mouth Surgery" Her tongue is on the blink She just talks, sqwacks and talks some more 'Cause she don't know how to think So please don't be stallin' Her brain is now corrupt Can't you see that she has fallen' And she just can't ''shut-up!" Big Mouth Surgery Cause no pills seem to work Hurry please now doctor Before she drives us all berserk Big Mouth Surgery But will it work without a doubt? Better make it a lobotomy Before she starts to shout! (solo) Our reputations are expensive While her talk is **** cheap You just can't tell her nothin' 'Cause a secret she can't keep No one seems to know What the fuss is all about We're just waitin' for her brain To catch up with her mouth She needs Big Mouth Surgery Her mind is on the blink She always talks, talks and talks all day Why can't she just please stop & think? So please don't be stallin' Her head is all corrupt Can't you see that she has fallen' Her fat-mouth can't shut-up! Big Mouth Surgery We need to find her a shrink Hurry please there doctor Before she drives us all to drink Big Mouth Surgery She's heard north, east, west & south Who gave her brain a laxative? Got diarrhea of the mouth! Big Mouth Surgery No pill can take effect Hurry please now doctor She is a mental wreck Our minds: she made us loose Her words: just seem to ooze It's so hard: to take a snooze We just drown all-day in ***** Beer, Whisky, Wine & ***** . . . To wash away our ear-ache blues! Yip Yip Zip Lip!  ...Yee Haw! (c) 2009    David Wayne Clare CLAIRVOYANT MUSIC / BMI all rights reserved in perpetuity
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70
Nasrudin’s friend visits him and asks to borrow his donkey for a day Oh no, dear friend, says Nasrudin moving close to his window *My brother borrowed my only donkey just yesterday…* And just then Nasrudin’s donkey brays aloud from the garden: Hee-haw! Hee-haw! Hee-haw! But - says Nasrudin’s friend, with a twinkle in his eye - *I can hear your donkey in the garden! I can hear your donkey!* Ah, says Nasrudin, cool and at ease: *Who’d you rather believe? Me? Or a donkey?*
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Aug 31, 2011
Aug 31, 2011 at 4:07 AM UTC
Could I borrow your donkey, Nasrudin?
Nasrudin looks in the magic mirror that allows him to peep into the future and he sees many marvelous poems in cyberspace. So Nasrudin calls his Donkey and he says to Donkey: *See, Donkey – there are so many marvelous poems in cyberspace. They are beautiful poems.* But Nasrudin’s Donkey says: *Hee-haw! - what’s the use? As far as I’m concerned the only good poem  is the one printed on paper.* And why is that? asks Nasrudin. *Because, at least when I’m desperately hungry, I can eat paper – but I can’t eat cyberspace can I?* replies Donkey.
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Sep 7, 2011
Sep 7, 2011 at 7:14 AM UTC
Nasrudin's donkey eats poetry
Dear magazine and tv fashion hast thou ever heard of natural passion you Photoshop you cut and crop you edit this and that ... Please stop the real beauties are those that know you don't have to be a size zero Sixteen eighteen or all above can still find joy can still know love nipped and tucked Kozmo get ****** only chicken skin gets plucked wax n shave and now vajazzil it Draba for gods sake don't talk **** lift em up and shrink that bottom yet there's something that you've forgotten men prefer a sense of humour to all this artificial hoo haw so girls for reason and for sanity tear up this propaganda vanity be yourselves and break the habit be a bunny girl not a freakin rabbit ditch the salad bin the chart Declare today a brand new start ugly is as ugly does as spoken by the media buzz today take back your sass and bounce cause your all woman each gorgeous ounce men admit it for gods sake there's nothing **** bout a rake women should live for more than style so come on sweetheart chin up... and smile now let your heart and soul start humming and as for boys.....                                  Keep em' comming
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Feb 3, 2013
Feb 3, 2013 at 10:01 AM UTC
You're Beautiful ( **** Off Kozmo )
you can wear your cap twisted sideways sag your pants down to your knees ride a pachyderm or a mule that brays be whatever kind of fool you please sing love songs in the rose garden or complain how the dollar done fell knowing qadafi, hussein, and bin laden have all been dispatched to hell you can rant and rave about raw deals you can raise your snout and sashay about or he-haw and buck, kick up your heels or vote for more hope or to kick da *** out you can lean to the left or to the right weighing the pros and cons and hype but you can't stay out of this fight and claim you're just not the type to freely elect their governments and laws evers, walesa, mandela, and susan b lived and died for just such a cause to see the people's voices set free but if you just call it mumbo jumbo and aloofly let this moment pass we all may be led by Dumbo or maybe that other ******* what percentage do you claim? forty-seven, one, or ninety-nine? tea party? occupier? some other name? are you just spouting a party line? all our blood runs red 'bove us all the sky is blue and no matter what is said there's one thing we all should do hadn't you better cast a vote? against the ones who vote aginst you? i think you'd really better vote ... it's the least but the best thing you can do. doug curry 10/24/2012
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Nov 1, 2012
Nov 1, 2012 at 12:43 PM UTC
you'd better vote
How horrible the plot the hem, the haw of the incessantly violent torture ****    How sad the politic the row, the scorn the media howl, the noise the storm            We are drifting in a sea          of bobble head puppets          backstabbing, mass murdering          mask-faced tyrants          and we are loosing the battle          before it's even begun             So go ahead now          and trade in your votes          sell off your rights          buy a backfiring gun             Because nothing is worse          than trying to reverse evolution          and you can't crawl back          into the womb of your Mother          once you've destroyed          the primordial ooze          of creation's lubrication          for a dollar and a cheapened dream's          inflation
0
Jan 11, 2017
Jan 11, 2017 at 5:08 PM UTC
DNA Breakdown
*Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw* I can read…donkey as I am, I can read Where did I learn to read? they taught me at home, they taught me at school they taught me at the camps and retreats and at all the Assemblies and Gatherings and at various Thought Adjustment Programs *Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw* I can read…donkey as I am, I can read and I can recite They trained me well to recite and to memorize and to regurgitate and to repeat and repeat and repeat at the Houses of Prayer the Holy Ones stood before us and they trained us, they drilled us thousands and thousands of us and millions and millions of us and through years and years and centuries and centuries *Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw* No variation, no change, just - *Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw* I can read, I can recite, I can repeat they trained us well at Animal Farm – word for word, repeat and repeat and repeat and when in doubt, we have our Great Leaders Pigs for Pigs, Goats for Goats, Turkeys for Turkeys and Donkeys for Donkeys who will speak for us *Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw* I can read, I can recite, I can repeat so must you, if you should be pure, if you should be saved if you should see the Truth *Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw* I can read, I can recite, I can repeat *Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw*
0
Jul 25, 2012
Jul 25, 2012 at 6:24 PM UTC
Goya’s donkey
When I was a baby I was given a doll It was pretty though it was small I thought I wanted to look like her when I was tall In kindergarten I took dance I had to learn to wear lipstick as well as my stance I had to look good to be given a chance In sixth grade I had a flaw Acne began and others saw Kids in my class began to haw I went home and told my maw She gave me concealer and a bra In highschool makeup took half the day Just to hear nice things people would say When asked I'd say it's just for play I didn't have time, it was late I had to be out the door by eight No one called me pretty, I would never find a mate Something better happened, I had time to create
0
May 22, 2015
May 22, 2015 at 7:47 PM UTC
Makeup
it’s time now let’s all do the donkey dance it’s time now for intelligence to carry the donkey that’s the way each one of you carry a donkey for the donkey is tired of its burden and now it’s your turn a throne for the donkeys each intelligence must be so now carry the donkey each one of you and me - of course, me too and let’s do the donkey dance left right left right hee haw haw hee and side and round and turn hee haw haw hee come dance all intelligent beings this is the dance ever since earth’s first been the dance of the donkeys borne on our backs by you, me and every other human being the ancient dance of the donkeys left right left right hee haw haw hee and side and round and turn hee haw haw hee
0
Feb 9, 2012
Feb 9, 2012 at 8:46 PM UTC
time now for the donkey dance
So aye We wir watchin that David Attenborough or tryin tae - fower weans tearin up the joint, an she's like, See if youse dinny shut it...! an aw that, ken - You no gonny tell thum? So ah'm like, "Aye.   Wheesht, youse." But it wis amazin, like. These fish. Years oot at sea. Tiny wee at first, dodgin sharks an jellyfish an aw sorts, awa oot, miles fae land. (*God!  Youse!  Take it up the stair! Tell thum, you!* "Aye, boys.  Listen tae yir ma.") Then wan day, like they get the urge, ken? Got tae go. An in they come, surgin fae the sea, these sleek, silver bullets fat wi feedin. (I'll no tell yis again!) Nothin, an ah mean nothing is gonny stop them. Waterfalls?  Nae bother. Just pure hungry fir the lassies, ken? The boy Attenborough sais they dinny even eat! (*That's it!  Ah tellt ye! Here you!  Take some responsibility, wull ye?* "Eh?  Oh, aye. Away tae yir rooms, boys - yir ma tellt ye.") These pure ***** divils will loup up sheer cliffs, baws burstin, bi the look ay it. Poetry in motion, ken? Like, ah dinny ken, pure water brought tae life, an that. Jist pure savage. An then, haw - they find the lassies! An it's jist, like, 'splurge'! Done the deed. Gemme ower, job done, deid. An there's this shot. Ripplin shallows, just fill ay the twitchin bodies. Craws an bears an that, queuin up fir the bonanza. Jist, like, totally spent. An she's aw, *Here, is that no terrible? Pair buggers! Eifter aw that!* An ah'm like, "Aye." But see inside, ah'm thinkin, "Lucky, lucky ********
0
Mar 14, 2016
Mar 14, 2016 at 11:43 AM UTC
Salmon
So aye We wir watchin that David Attenborough or tryin tae - fower weans tearin up the joint, an she's like, See if youse dinny shut it...! an aw that, ken - You no gonny tell thum? So ah'm like, "Aye.   Wheesht, youse." But it wis amazin, like. These fish. Years oot at sea. Tiny wee at first, dodgin sharks an jellyfish an aw sorts, awa oot, miles fae land. (*God!  Youse!  Take it up the stair! Tell thum, you!* "Aye, boys.  Listen tae yir ma.") Then wan day, like they get the urge, ken? Got tae go. An in they come, surgin fae the sea, these sleek, silver bullets fat wi feedin. (I'll no tell yis again!) Nothin, an ah mean nothing is gonny stop them. Waterfalls?  Nae bother. Just pure hungry fir the lassies, ken? The boy Attenborough sais they dinny even eat! (*That's it!  Ah tellt ye! Here you!  Take some responsibility, wull ye?* "Eh?  Oh, aye. Away tae yir rooms, boys - yir ma tellt ye.") These pure ***** divils will loup up sheer cliffs, baws burstin, bi the look ay it. Poetry in motion, ken? Like, ah dinny ken, pure water brought tae life, an that. Jist pure savage. An then, haw - they find the lassies! An it's jist, like, 'splurge'! Done the deed. Gemme ower, job done, deid. An there's this shot. Ripplin shallows, just fill ay the twitchin bodies. Craws an bears an that, queuin up fir the bonanza. Jist, like, totally spent. An she's aw, *Here, is that no terrible? Pair buggers! Eifter aw that!* An ah'm like, "Aye." But see inside, ah'm thinkin, "Lucky, lucky ********
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76
The crowds, slithering down the aisles            aimless yet ordered,  manoeuvering                      shopping carts and metal baskets Welcome to the lower class, the minion slave tied to the renting a house instead of a home. The climate is too harsh not to have shelter. They shop at thrift stores and outfit themselves for twenty bucks, hell they can find a living room for under a hundred dollars or bones or what ever you want to call them, that magic thing called Ca$h. All those people spending that cash, in most cases, hard earned. How did this ever happen * The Consumer they call us                                                      We save a lot of money                                                              Spending money we don't got. Ownership is the problem.. How does someone have the right to stake a claim to a chunk of land, then parcel  it off and make money selling it. The Earth belongs to all of us. The rich will go forward and lay claim to any planet they can reach for its natural resources.. How the hell can we let that happen. The Universe is ours, it belongs to everybody. We will leave this dirt and venture back when it has healed. I can see them harvesting asteroids and riding  comets, waving there Stetsons And hootin' yee haw as they speed through the galaxy, trying to hold onto their imagined power. The making up the rules as they go along. Sometimes I just have to ignore everything and create my own little world. A world where I trust my dead friends for sure. I don't know about everyone else. Leave everything all behind  finding some real peace. Not this chanting about it, but shaping it and moving it like the malleable construct that it is....                if you can call it a construct... and if you can't then 'what the hell'. We are more than we know, more than we claim.. the People can be the power We can start again, start all over before we swallow ourselves whole... and in part. Dismembered for certain. Dismembered and sent to the other side of the country, or half way around the world.
0
Jul 31, 2015
Jul 31, 2015 at 12:24 AM UTC
The Dollar Store
The crowds, slithering down the aisles            aimless yet ordered,  manoeuvering                      shopping carts and metal baskets Welcome to the lower class, the minion slave tied to the renting a house instead of a home. The climate is too harsh not to have shelter. They shop at thrift stores and outfit themselves for twenty bucks, hell they can find a living room for under a hundred dollars or bones or what ever you want to call them, that magic thing called Ca$h. All those people spending that cash, in most cases, hard earned. How did this ever happen * The Consumer they call us                                                      We save a lot of money                                                              Spending money we don't got. Ownership is the problem.. How does someone have the right to stake a claim to a chunk of land, then parcel  it off and make money selling it. The Earth belongs to all of us. The rich will go forward and lay claim to any planet they can reach for its natural resources.. How the hell can we let that happen. The Universe is ours, it belongs to everybody. We will leave this dirt and venture back when it has healed. I can see them harvesting asteroids and riding  comets, waving there Stetsons And hootin' yee haw as they speed through the galaxy, trying to hold onto their imagined power. The making up the rules as they go along. Sometimes I just have to ignore everything and create my own little world. A world where I trust my dead friends for sure. I don't know about everyone else. Leave everything all behind  finding some real peace. Not this chanting about it, but shaping it and moving it like the malleable construct that it is....                if you can call it a construct... and if you can't then 'what the hell'. We are more than we know, more than we claim.. the People can be the power We can start again, start all over before we swallow ourselves whole... and in part. Dismembered for certain. Dismembered and sent to the other side of the country, or half way around the world.
Continue reading...
19
They are the ones That rule the world for fun They disseminate the guns And tell us to run So we flee From their disease That will not cease Power is control that money buys Burying us in gold and petty lies They tell us the well has run dry While we watch them fly Fences of barbed wire For us to admire Inferno funeral pyres Burn our desires When they rattle We're the cattle That goes to battle They talk to us with false information And real bullets They say it is our fault for instigation The trigger they pull it When their saccharine voice Offers a laughable choice Forsake love and compassion To adopt their fashion Of society crashing They used to use lashings Now they use time Punishing those who aren't complicit in their crimes They put us in prison If we don't agree with their decisions Decimating Bedouin life So they can profit from strife People ask who "they" are The easiest answer is not me And the problems aren't too far For anybody to see That there is a "they" Not intent on doomsday But numb to the death of strangers Which puts us all in danger I could point to examples like Lockheed Martin and Shell As two companies that put us in hell Or a country like North Korea That has violent ideas Or a man like Donald Trump Who is a parasitic lump They convince us they don't exist So we don't resist While they insist We enlist In their army Of harming Starring Them We hem And haw While they write laws That point out our flaws That are minimal compared to theirs Yet they are the fortunate heirs Who decide the code of conduct Which is whatever sells their product From plastic to bombs Killing dolphins and moms They feel they can't be wrong When might Is right The meek take flight But there is poison in the air And they don't even care They **** the Earth And ****** its inhabitants What are we worth When it's to the rich we gravitate? There is an apostle Who's turned into a fossil That is converted into fuel So they can keep their pull And use us as tools To unearth jewels And hoard them Because we can't afford them We surrender our resources to a select few To do what they choose Until we all lose And can't see the light of day Who else to blame but "they"?
0
Dec 30, 2017
Dec 30, 2017 at 7:38 AM UTC
They
They are the ones That rule the world for fun They disseminate the guns And tell us to run So we flee From their disease That will not cease Power is control that money buys Burying us in gold and petty lies They tell us the well has run dry While we watch them fly Fences of barbed wire For us to admire Inferno funeral pyres Burn our desires When they rattle We're the cattle That goes to battle They talk to us with false information And real bullets They say it is our fault for instigation The trigger they pull it When their saccharine voice Offers a laughable choice Forsake love and compassion To adopt their fashion Of society crashing They used to use lashings Now they use time Punishing those who aren't complicit in their crimes They put us in prison If we don't agree with their decisions Decimating Bedouin life So they can profit from strife People ask who "they" are The easiest answer is not me And the problems aren't too far For anybody to see That there is a "they" Not intent on doomsday But numb to the death of strangers Which puts us all in danger I could point to examples like Lockheed Martin and Shell As two companies that put us in hell Or a country like North Korea That has violent ideas Or a man like Donald Trump Who is a parasitic lump They convince us they don't exist So we don't resist While they insist We enlist In their army Of harming Starring Them We hem And haw While they write laws That point out our flaws That are minimal compared to theirs Yet they are the fortunate heirs Who decide the code of conduct Which is whatever sells their product From plastic to bombs Killing dolphins and moms They feel they can't be wrong When might Is right The meek take flight But there is poison in the air And they don't even care They **** the Earth And ****** its inhabitants What are we worth When it's to the rich we gravitate? There is an apostle Who's turned into a fossil That is converted into fuel So they can keep their pull And use us as tools To unearth jewels And hoard them Because we can't afford them We surrender our resources to a select few To do what they choose Until we all lose And can't see the light of day Who else to blame but "they"?
Continue reading...
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