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"gout" poems
The shopping channel calls to me It wakes me up at night To sell me things I do not need Nor would buy, if I was right But apparently, there's something wrong My brain should be re-wired I only purchase things on here When I am really over-tired I have a room specifically For things bought on TV I've ginsu knives and shredding blades And juicers!!!...ninety three!! For some reason the kitchen things Just seem to catch my eye Especially at three a.m. That's the time I need to buy I've magic bullets by the score Processors,  I don't need But, if I ever put them all to use... An army I could feed I've got socks for diabetics Things to make your ******* stand out I've got exercise machines galore I've got three things that help gout! My credit card's at the limit I know the numbers off by heart The post man knows me by my name I even have my own **** cart To deliver all my purchases They just load it and deliver It almost comes here by itself It's enough to make one shiver I don't know how it started I think the countdown clock...ah, yes I thought it meant the game was ending I phoned in and bought a dress!!! I've got jewellery by Joan Rivers George Foreman grills...they fill my den I've got perfumes for the women And lots of things that make you men! My wife cannot contain me She's sent me off to get some aid But, if they sell it on the telly I'll buy it sure as getting laid I've bedazzled all my clothing I eat dried fruit and jerky too I get Christmas cards from Ronco I'm a shopping ****** through and through Each month we have a garage sale I sell off some of what I've bought But, then I go and buy it back again Without a second thought My friends have all but left me I rarely go out of the house I just sit here and go shopping I don't even see my spouse Set it and Forget it That's a phrase I love to say But wait, there's more...is another one That helps me through the day I used the last one on my wife One night while having *** She told me "Set it and Forget It" I'm off to dreamland Tex!! My shopping's an addiction One I hope to beat some day But now, the operator says... I have to get my card and pay!
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Jul 2, 2012
Jul 2, 2012 at 7:19 PM UTC
Shopping addict
The shopping channel calls to me It wakes me up at night To sell me things I do not need Nor would buy, if I was right But apparently, there's something wrong My brain should be re-wired I only purchase things on here When I am really over-tired I have a room specifically For things bought on TV I've ginsu knives and shredding blades And juicers!!!...ninety three!! For some reason the kitchen things Just seem to catch my eye Especially at three a.m. That's the time I need to buy I've magic bullets by the score Processors,  I don't need But, if I ever put them all to use... An army I could feed I've got socks for diabetics Things to make your ******* stand out I've got exercise machines galore I've got three things that help gout! My credit card's at the limit I know the numbers off by heart The post man knows me by my name I even have my own **** cart To deliver all my purchases They just load it and deliver It almost comes here by itself It's enough to make one shiver I don't know how it started I think the countdown clock...ah, yes I thought it meant the game was ending I phoned in and bought a dress!!! I've got jewellery by Joan Rivers George Foreman grills...they fill my den I've got perfumes for the women And lots of things that make you men! My wife cannot contain me She's sent me off to get some aid But, if they sell it on the telly I'll buy it sure as getting laid I've bedazzled all my clothing I eat dried fruit and jerky too I get Christmas cards from Ronco I'm a shopping ****** through and through Each month we have a garage sale I sell off some of what I've bought But, then I go and buy it back again Without a second thought My friends have all but left me I rarely go out of the house I just sit here and go shopping I don't even see my spouse Set it and Forget it That's a phrase I love to say But wait, there's more...is another one That helps me through the day I used the last one on my wife One night while having *** She told me "Set it and Forget It" I'm off to dreamland Tex!! My shopping's an addiction One I hope to beat some day But now, the operator says... I have to get my card and pay!
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68
Fros-ty the Snowman had a twin brother named Lou He got hit by a truck, and we said "What the **** and "You should totally sue!" Before-he could call a lawyer along came a snow plow it mixed him up, with yellow snowman guts and he got snowman AIDS and gout The ne-xt day, Lou died but he left an inheritance check Frosty sued the man, and took all he had, then he cashed in both of the checks Fros-ty moved up north Alaska is where he's livin' where he got buck wild, and had a child, that he fathered with Sarah Palin Fros-ty the Snowman had a twin brother named Lou who brought about fame to the family name in Time and US Weekly too!!!
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Dec 10, 2010
Dec 10, 2010 at 4:52 PM UTC
Frosty the Snowman (And his Brother Lou)
i peeked into your secret i unbottuned your sensitivity with your own sarcasm you blew my vietnam my heart is a touchy speaker cable and you sparked me up now i am empty beer bottles oscillating in your hand and then you set me down i am your nostalgia and you can only think of bad things like bruised knees and gout and that summer you had walking pneumonia and syphilis and you cried every night into your mother's arms i am the cancer you faked in order to gain attention i am that boy that fell for it and gave you syphilis i am your shaved head on picture day in the 9th grade i am your solitude i am your noise i am your virginity being taken in the backseat of your brother's best friend's parent's camaro when you were 15 and more than willing
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Nov 27, 2011
Nov 27, 2011 at 7:26 PM UTC
Walking Pneumonia
they say that love never dies could never curl and bawl and cry love is the purest of all emotions even turbulent and torrid it is pure, never horrid but I'm tired of loving you or seeing your jaw, you finger, your tooth and feeling a rush of fear that i will never escape from this anxious pit of unclear good intentions and impure thoughts so i do what i am taught i slog through the love, the lust the misplaced affections because i need, i must be graced with one smile, a small glimpse even if my feelings you already dismissed i was going to tell you, don't you know? i was going to knock my feelings off their petty throne i thought that maybe if i let it all out i would not feel a gout of excitement for the forbidden feelings that maybe i could stop pealing in laughter at the smallest thing when i thought you weren't looking, as i watched you sing that i would have the control of my buzzing desire but now i refuse to fan the fire my friends still egg me on. Valentines Day is on Saturday, what could go wrong? I've found that people are great at giving advice when it wont affect them even once or twice but they know that you know off my misplaced affection you see it now in every inflection she lied and told you behind my back and then asked me to cut her some slack when now that tenuous friendship we once had was broken and i only ask you to give me a token of admitting your silence rings out louder than any no
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Feb 11, 2015
Feb 11, 2015 at 11:51 PM UTC
I'm tired of loving you
Now I'd like to tell you of a liquid And a beverage clearly divine It matches the holiest spirit And most blessed communion wine But it's not to be found at the altar Of the temple, the mosque or the church You'll see it in glasses lined up on the bar Wherever the pensioners perch Oh Gin, Gin, fabulous Gin Finest concoction there ever has bin A knee to the crotch and a kick in the shin To him that speaks ill of that heavenly Gin I had a great aunty called Floris Each morning she'd sternly arise With a fire in the pit of her stomach And a merciless scowl in her eyes But thanks to a magical fluid By the end she was quite the reverse And her face was serene and so tranquil As they bundled her into the hearse Oh Gin, Gin, glorious Gin Remover of troubles and varnish and skin There's many a baby that wouldn't have bin If not for a bottle of beautiful Gin Edith was crippled with cramp of the back And terrible gout of the thighs Her walk was askew and her bottom had swelled To a rather astonishing size But with Gin in the morning, the noon and night She was right as proverbial rain She still couldn't walk but now couldn't talk So no one could hear her complain Oh Gin, Gin, medicinal Gin Bracing your face with a permanent grin Cleans up the silver but tarnishes tin Joyous the juice of the juniper, Gin Tis a regular modern elixir And a kick in the liver to boot It's companion for many a mixer To the tonic or blending of fruit Instilling a mighty contentment And removing all traces of rage Though it's mainly imbibed by ladies Those of a particular age... Oh Gin, Gin, magnificent Gin Clean as a whistle and sharp as a pin Puts hairs on the ears, the chest and chin Of nannies and grannies all guzzling Gin
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Apr 5, 2013
Apr 5, 2013 at 6:14 PM UTC
A Lovely Song About Gin ;)
Now I'd like to tell you of a liquid And a beverage clearly divine It matches the holiest spirit And most blessed communion wine But it's not to be found at the altar Of the temple, the mosque or the church You'll see it in glasses lined up on the bar Wherever the pensioners perch Oh Gin, Gin, fabulous Gin Finest concoction there ever has bin A knee to the crotch and a kick in the shin To him that speaks ill of that heavenly Gin I had a great aunty called Floris Each morning she'd sternly arise With a fire in the pit of her stomach And a merciless scowl in her eyes But thanks to a magical fluid By the end she was quite the reverse And her face was serene and so tranquil As they bundled her into the hearse Oh Gin, Gin, glorious Gin Remover of troubles and varnish and skin There's many a baby that wouldn't have bin If not for a bottle of beautiful Gin Edith was crippled with cramp of the back And terrible gout of the thighs Her walk was askew and her bottom had swelled To a rather astonishing size But with Gin in the morning, the noon and night She was right as proverbial rain She still couldn't walk but now couldn't talk So no one could hear her complain Oh Gin, Gin, medicinal Gin Bracing your face with a permanent grin Cleans up the silver but tarnishes tin Joyous the juice of the juniper, Gin Tis a regular modern elixir And a kick in the liver to boot It's companion for many a mixer To the tonic or blending of fruit Instilling a mighty contentment And removing all traces of rage Though it's mainly imbibed by ladies Those of a particular age... Oh Gin, Gin, magnificent Gin Clean as a whistle and sharp as a pin Puts hairs on the ears, the chest and chin Of nannies and grannies all guzzling Gin
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hickory nuts and wind trees are keeping at the old buckle bay light house corners and shaker church craft slip anchor on the southern tip secret legions and phenolic board tuck in at gout dock bands and nations and miracle speak fill in the center hall sand hooks and water domes cover wharf road ***** bay toppers and seven horse chugs scatter the swollen upper deck packards and pushers and rusty back rails skirt the night lanterns and sterns and navy gulls steady on task sand cakes and drift wood held tight on the mystery tour yellow tails and tide pools flat line at royal reach paddles and cables find ripples way smugglers and smitties take cover from a northern gale down on pocket shoal there’s a graceful hue ~ they’re serving up belons and xan… it's time to get in for a fill
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Jul 3, 2017
Jul 3, 2017 at 2:12 PM UTC
The Reach at Buckle Bay
I got pills I got to take, so I'm going to take, take, take them everyday. I have ailments that  I have to feed, so I'm going take which everyone needs I got pills. All these pills piling up on my desk, stacked like the pyramids higher than my chest. all these kids running around, I hear them Grrrr.. so I lock my pills up sound. The pharmacy is open to my needs, she just rolls her eyes to my relapses. Says she's going to leave me,  if I don't bring the cost down below twenty G's. oh my, oh my, oh my, oh my **Gosh **** gosh **** gosh, gosh **** Oh my, oh my, oh my, oh my   I got pills I got to take, so I'm going to take, take, take them everyday. I have ailments that  I have to feed, so I'm going take which everyone needs I got pills. Woke up this morning aches in my neck, gout in my foot, what the heck. opened the cabinet, pills all gone, crack addict snuck in,  took the lot. Jumped on my bike, tire's flat not a good start. no license for a car, ailments mean ill have to walk. standing behind some old dude chugs out a **** pills got laxative effect, I think I better not laugh. Oh my, oh my, oh my, oh my **Gosh **** gosh **** gosh, gosh **** Oh my, oh my, oh my, oh my. I got pills I got to take, so I'm going to take, take, take them everyday. I have ailments that  I have to feed, so I'm going take which everyone needs I got! "groans in loud noises, Aaaaaaaaaa" And my stomach, my stomach I said my stomach! Pills make me want to eat food. I got pills I got to take, so I'm going to take, take, take them everyday. I have ailments that  I have to feed, so I'm going take which everyone needs. I got pills I got to take, so I'm going to take, take, take them everyday. I have ailments that  I have to feed, so I'm going take which everyone needs I got pills. *Mama got pills, daddy got pills,                                 yo sister got pills,       yo auntie got pills.* I got pills. Yo uncle got pills, Everybody got pills, everybody got pills.
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Apr 1, 2018
Apr 1, 2018 at 12:34 PM UTC
I Got Pills [Parody To I Got Bills]
I got pills I got to take, so I'm going to take, take, take them everyday. I have ailments that  I have to feed, so I'm going take which everyone needs I got pills. All these pills piling up on my desk, stacked like the pyramids higher than my chest. all these kids running around, I hear them Grrrr.. so I lock my pills up sound. The pharmacy is open to my needs, she just rolls her eyes to my relapses. Says she's going to leave me,  if I don't bring the cost down below twenty G's. oh my, oh my, oh my, oh my **Gosh **** gosh **** gosh, gosh **** Oh my, oh my, oh my, oh my   I got pills I got to take, so I'm going to take, take, take them everyday. I have ailments that  I have to feed, so I'm going take which everyone needs I got pills. Woke up this morning aches in my neck, gout in my foot, what the heck. opened the cabinet, pills all gone, crack addict snuck in,  took the lot. Jumped on my bike, tire's flat not a good start. no license for a car, ailments mean ill have to walk. standing behind some old dude chugs out a **** pills got laxative effect, I think I better not laugh. Oh my, oh my, oh my, oh my **Gosh **** gosh **** gosh, gosh **** Oh my, oh my, oh my, oh my. I got pills I got to take, so I'm going to take, take, take them everyday. I have ailments that  I have to feed, so I'm going take which everyone needs I got! "groans in loud noises, Aaaaaaaaaa" And my stomach, my stomach I said my stomach! Pills make me want to eat food. I got pills I got to take, so I'm going to take, take, take them everyday. I have ailments that  I have to feed, so I'm going take which everyone needs. I got pills I got to take, so I'm going to take, take, take them everyday. I have ailments that  I have to feed, so I'm going take which everyone needs I got pills. *Mama got pills, daddy got pills,                                 yo sister got pills,       yo auntie got pills.* I got pills. Yo uncle got pills, Everybody got pills, everybody got pills.
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Lento You'll bare your bones you'll grow you'll pray you'll only know When the light appears, boy, when the light appears You'll sing & you'll love you'll praise blue heavens above When the light appears, boy, when the light appears You'll whimper & you'll cry you'll get yourself sick and sigh You'll sleep & you'll dream you'll only know what you mean When the light appears, boy, when the light appears You'll come & you'll go, you'll wander to and fro You'll go home in despair you'll wonder why'd you care You'll stammer & you'll lie you'll ask everybody why You'll cough and you'll pout you'll kick your toe with gout You'll jump you'll shout you'll knock you're friends about You'll bawl and you'll deny & announce your eyes are dry You'll roll and you'll rock you'll show your big hard **** You'll love and you'll grieve & one day you'll come believe As you whistle & you smile the lord made you worthwhile You'll preach and you'll glide on the pulpit in your pride Sneak & slide across the stage like a river in high tide You'll come fast or come on slow just the same you'll never know When the light appears, boy, when the light appears May 3, 1987, 2:30 AM
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3.2k
When The Light Appears
JE VOIS QUE TU SALIVES. TU AS ENVIE DE MOI ? SERS-TOI DONC ! PRENDS-MOI COMME TU  VEUX ! PRENDS TOUT CE QUE TU VEUX ! ETIRE-MOI, CARESSE-MOI, BRANLE-MOI VIDE-MOI, LECHE-MOI AVALE-MOI MA SEMENCE A LE GOUT DE VIOLETTE IMMORTELLE ET SI TU VEUX METS-EN QUELQUES PERLES DANS UNE FIOLE ET METS-LA AU CREUX DE TES HANCHES POUR TE DEPANNER AU BESOIN SI UNE PETITE SOIF VENAIT A SE FAIRE SENTIR ET QUE JE NE SERAIS PAS LA POUR TE SERVIR DU PRODUCTEUR AU CONSOMMATEUR. HONORE-MOI DE TA JOUISSANCE MOI JE RETIENS MON JUS DE JADE POUR TOI IL NE FAUT PAS GASPILLER CETTE MANNE EN VAIN ELLE EST A TOI N'EN  PERDS PAS UNE GOUTTE ET MEME SI CHAQUE GOUTTE QUI GICLE ME RAPPROCHE DE LA MORT C'EST AVEC JOIE ET DELICE QUE JE MEURS INELUCTABLE CHAQUE FOIS DANS TA BOUCHE ET QUE JE BANDE ET DEBANDE SOUS LES ASSAUTS DES POINTS ET DES TIRETS DE TA LANGUE QUI ME DECODE ET ME DEGUSTE EN MORSE.
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Aug 31, 2019
Aug 31, 2019 at 2:30 AM UTC
Poème érotique en morse (for adults only)
There are certain things -a spider, a ghost, The income-tax, gout, an umbrella for three - That I hate, but the thing that I hate the most Is a thing they call the SEA. Pour some salt water over the floor - Ugly I'm sure you'll allow it to be: Suppose it extended a mile or more, That's very like the SEA. Beat a dog till it howls outright - Cruel, but all very well for a spree; Suppose that one did so day and night, That would be like the SEA. I had a vision of nursery-maids; Tens of thousands passed by me - All leading children with wooden spades, And this was by the SEA. Who invented those spades of wood? Who was it cut them out of the tree? None, I think, but an idiot could - Or one that loved the SEA. It is pleasant and dreamy, no doubt, to float With 'thoughts as boundless, and souls as free'; But suppose you are very unwell in a boat, How do you like the SEA. There is an insect that people avoid (Whence is derived the verb 'to flee') Where have you been by it most annoyed? In lodgings by the SEA. If you like coffee with sand for dregs, A decided hint of salt in your tea, And a fishy taste in the very eggs - By all means choose the SEA. And if, with these dainties to drink and eat, You prefer not a vestige of grass or tree, And a chronic state of wet in your feet, Then -I recommend the SEA. For I have friends who dwell by the coast, Pleasant friends they are to me! It is when I'm with them I wonder most That anyone likes the SEA. They take me a walk: though tired and stiff, To climb the heights I madly agree: And, after a tumble or so from the cliff, They kindly suggest the SEA. I try the rocks, and I think it cool That they laugh with such an excess of glee, As I heavily slip into every pool, That skirts the cold, cold SEA.
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2.3k
The Sea
There are certain things -a spider, a ghost, The income-tax, gout, an umbrella for three - That I hate, but the thing that I hate the most Is a thing they call the SEA. Pour some salt water over the floor - Ugly I'm sure you'll allow it to be: Suppose it extended a mile or more, That's very like the SEA. Beat a dog till it howls outright - Cruel, but all very well for a spree; Suppose that one did so day and night, That would be like the SEA. I had a vision of nursery-maids; Tens of thousands passed by me - All leading children with wooden spades, And this was by the SEA. Who invented those spades of wood? Who was it cut them out of the tree? None, I think, but an idiot could - Or one that loved the SEA. It is pleasant and dreamy, no doubt, to float With 'thoughts as boundless, and souls as free'; But suppose you are very unwell in a boat, How do you like the SEA. There is an insect that people avoid (Whence is derived the verb 'to flee') Where have you been by it most annoyed? In lodgings by the SEA. If you like coffee with sand for dregs, A decided hint of salt in your tea, And a fishy taste in the very eggs - By all means choose the SEA. And if, with these dainties to drink and eat, You prefer not a vestige of grass or tree, And a chronic state of wet in your feet, Then -I recommend the SEA. For I have friends who dwell by the coast, Pleasant friends they are to me! It is when I'm with them I wonder most That anyone likes the SEA. They take me a walk: though tired and stiff, To climb the heights I madly agree: And, after a tumble or so from the cliff, They kindly suggest the SEA. I try the rocks, and I think it cool That they laugh with such an excess of glee, As I heavily slip into every pool, That skirts the cold, cold SEA.
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48
"This is a song..." "This is uhh, This is a new song..." "It's through the eyes of one of the greatest people alive, I feel..." "The Lunchlady" [Laughing] Woke up in the morning Put on my new plastic glove Served some reheated salisbury steak With a little slice of love Got no clue what the chicken *** pie is made of Just know everything's doing fine Down here in Lunchlady Land Well I wear this net on my head 'Cause my red hair is fallin' out I wear these brown orthopedic shoes 'Cause I got a bad case of the gout I know you want seconds on the corndogs But there's no reason to shout Everybody gets enough food Down here in Lunchlady Land Well yesterday's meatloaf is today's sloppy joes And my breath reeks of tuna And there's lots of black hairs coming out of my nose In Lunchlady Land your dreams come true Clouds made of carrots and peas Mountains built of shepherds pie And rivers made of macaroni and cheese But don't forget to return your trays And try to ignore my gum disease No student can escape the magic of Lunchlady Land Hoagies & grinders, hoagies & grinders Hoagies & grinders, hoagies & grinders Navy beans, navy beans, navy beans Hoagies & grinders, hoagies & grinders Navy beans, navy beans Meatloaf sandwich sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe Well I dreamt one morning That I woke up to see All the pepperoni pizza Was a-looking at me It screamed, why do you burn me And serve me up cold I said I got the spatula Just do what you're told Then the liver & onions Started joining the fight And the chocolate pudding Pushed me with all its might And the chop suey slapped me And it kicked me in the head It's called revenge Lunchlady Said the garlic bread I said what did I do To make you all so mad They said you got flabby arms And your breath is bad Then the green beans said You better run and hide But then my friend sloppy joe came And joined my side He said if it wasn't for the Lunchlady The kids wouldn't eatcha You should be shakin' her hand And sayin' please to meet ya She gives you a purpose And she gives you a goal You should be kissin' her feet And kissin' her mole Now all the angry foods Just leave me alone And we all live together In a happy home Thanks to sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe [Spoken] Well me & sloppy joe got married We got six kids and we're doing' just fine Down in Lunchlady Land
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Feb 23, 2016
Feb 23, 2016 at 6:45 PM UTC
Lunchlady land composed by adam *******
"This is a song..." "This is uhh, This is a new song..." "It's through the eyes of one of the greatest people alive, I feel..." "The Lunchlady" [Laughing] Woke up in the morning Put on my new plastic glove Served some reheated salisbury steak With a little slice of love Got no clue what the chicken *** pie is made of Just know everything's doing fine Down here in Lunchlady Land Well I wear this net on my head 'Cause my red hair is fallin' out I wear these brown orthopedic shoes 'Cause I got a bad case of the gout I know you want seconds on the corndogs But there's no reason to shout Everybody gets enough food Down here in Lunchlady Land Well yesterday's meatloaf is today's sloppy joes And my breath reeks of tuna And there's lots of black hairs coming out of my nose In Lunchlady Land your dreams come true Clouds made of carrots and peas Mountains built of shepherds pie And rivers made of macaroni and cheese But don't forget to return your trays And try to ignore my gum disease No student can escape the magic of Lunchlady Land Hoagies & grinders, hoagies & grinders Hoagies & grinders, hoagies & grinders Navy beans, navy beans, navy beans Hoagies & grinders, hoagies & grinders Navy beans, navy beans Meatloaf sandwich sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe Well I dreamt one morning That I woke up to see All the pepperoni pizza Was a-looking at me It screamed, why do you burn me And serve me up cold I said I got the spatula Just do what you're told Then the liver & onions Started joining the fight And the chocolate pudding Pushed me with all its might And the chop suey slapped me And it kicked me in the head It's called revenge Lunchlady Said the garlic bread I said what did I do To make you all so mad They said you got flabby arms And your breath is bad Then the green beans said You better run and hide But then my friend sloppy joe came And joined my side He said if it wasn't for the Lunchlady The kids wouldn't eatcha You should be shakin' her hand And sayin' please to meet ya She gives you a purpose And she gives you a goal You should be kissin' her feet And kissin' her mole Now all the angry foods Just leave me alone And we all live together In a happy home Thanks to sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe sloppy joe, slop, sloppy joe [Spoken] Well me & sloppy joe got married We got six kids and we're doing' just fine Down in Lunchlady Land
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85
Thatcher vacuum seals nicotine Slurps cigarette like mosquito Ravenous lungs gnaw and grind for the slow pander, Thatcher’s just another name for the labeling We plaster and pine for an out, Stitch that finite lie beneath squeamish child skin, Thatcher’s the black lung paradise, ******* infancy coddling cigarette stifle, The caloric crack of his canines fletching out lust and sickly groove As he’s scopes out fiend and vexed vandals, Clutches the sick theistic ********** Cuddle those bruise licked hips Give God the gross percent, Cause heaven’s in those greenbacks and God’s in the ******* kick, Suckling bout the American tip The Christian capitol, Seething on shadow puppet ****** and American dream, Gods got nothing to do with the slickened crinkle of gain and glamour, Thatcher’s just the candy man give and cult, Cough the crutch of contagion greed And clutch the cuff of your porcelain sleeve, Thatcher gleans your blackest suite tight, Struts raven blade shoulders perched on American made spine, Thatcher does as Thatcher please, Thatcher thinks as Thatcher bleeds, And Thatcher bleeds venereal blend, Gout with the American veneer of broken girl and scabbed moral traumatic, Trauma tastes as the hollow pixies give out the get out, Bandaged baby girls, The teenage horror show, Just another blazoned hit of one two take the hand me down generic give away, Desensitize the humanize, Girls got to get the days glossy puff and sniff, Thatcher’s content to satisfy, Callous coroner a spectator suckling Marlboro lick, Lodging thick smoke and toxin between spittle slick lips, Albino plumes clotting and unfolding, Thatcher clicks back the cartridge Filter and cigarette, Thatcher gulps back the need because brain’s got a favoring kink for the buzz, Thatcher sings with the screaming in his straggling lungs, Hums the western creed Laughs fickle with God at his need, Thatcher’s the true American dream
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Apr 23, 2013
Apr 23, 2013 at 5:17 PM UTC
Cancer, the American Made
Thatcher vacuum seals nicotine Slurps cigarette like mosquito Ravenous lungs gnaw and grind for the slow pander, Thatcher’s just another name for the labeling We plaster and pine for an out, Stitch that finite lie beneath squeamish child skin, Thatcher’s the black lung paradise, ******* infancy coddling cigarette stifle, The caloric crack of his canines fletching out lust and sickly groove As he’s scopes out fiend and vexed vandals, Clutches the sick theistic ********** Cuddle those bruise licked hips Give God the gross percent, Cause heaven’s in those greenbacks and God’s in the ******* kick, Suckling bout the American tip The Christian capitol, Seething on shadow puppet ****** and American dream, Gods got nothing to do with the slickened crinkle of gain and glamour, Thatcher’s just the candy man give and cult, Cough the crutch of contagion greed And clutch the cuff of your porcelain sleeve, Thatcher gleans your blackest suite tight, Struts raven blade shoulders perched on American made spine, Thatcher does as Thatcher please, Thatcher thinks as Thatcher bleeds, And Thatcher bleeds venereal blend, Gout with the American veneer of broken girl and scabbed moral traumatic, Trauma tastes as the hollow pixies give out the get out, Bandaged baby girls, The teenage horror show, Just another blazoned hit of one two take the hand me down generic give away, Desensitize the humanize, Girls got to get the days glossy puff and sniff, Thatcher’s content to satisfy, Callous coroner a spectator suckling Marlboro lick, Lodging thick smoke and toxin between spittle slick lips, Albino plumes clotting and unfolding, Thatcher clicks back the cartridge Filter and cigarette, Thatcher gulps back the need because brain’s got a favoring kink for the buzz, Thatcher sings with the screaming in his straggling lungs, Hums the western creed Laughs fickle with God at his need, Thatcher’s the true American dream
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45
it usually leaps like a swordfish out of the ocean and I’m able to harpoon it, but as of lately, I’m stuck with pond **** and the tuna on my bad breath. it’s nowhere to be found; not in the parks, the libraries, the liquor stores nor the circuit clerk’s office, I tried fishing it out of the swaps of spitfire and melancholy but found nothing I tried to ****** it with an excessive amount of trouble and ******** but found nothing I tried scooping the guts out of myself like a hollowed out pumpkin and splattered it with a wet slap against an old newspaper but found nothing there’s nothing here; no spark, no imagination, no ingenuity what I’m I suppose to do? as I sit here petting the black velvet fur of my dog, my toes won’t stop curling, my nails are bitten down to the nub and the stink of aging soars past like eagles on fire I have nothing to write about: no unpopular opinion no peculiar viewpoint no bludgeoning over the banality of extinction the only logical thing to do is head out to see some local band at a Chicago bar and see where the alcohol takes me I need the ammunition I need the fuel I need to make something happen the hard days of labor have diminished me through attrition and lack of euphemism but for right now, no matter how saturated I am of feeling and thought… whether I’m drunk on sleep, salacious on vulgarity, grieving with quills, vacant of ***** dreaming of gout, reading Géza Csáth, listening to Sass Dragons, burrowing under empty houses or fixing the plumbing for the woman down the hall. I still can’t coax the word out.
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Feb 13, 2025
Feb 13, 2025 at 10:45 AM UTC
no inspiration
it usually leaps like a swordfish out of the ocean and I’m able to harpoon it, but as of lately, I’m stuck with pond **** and the tuna on my bad breath. it’s nowhere to be found; not in the parks, the libraries, the liquor stores nor the circuit clerk’s office, I tried fishing it out of the swaps of spitfire and melancholy but found nothing I tried to ****** it with an excessive amount of trouble and ******** but found nothing I tried scooping the guts out of myself like a hollowed out pumpkin and splattered it with a wet slap against an old newspaper but found nothing there’s nothing here; no spark, no imagination, no ingenuity what I’m I suppose to do? as I sit here petting the black velvet fur of my dog, my toes won’t stop curling, my nails are bitten down to the nub and the stink of aging soars past like eagles on fire I have nothing to write about: no unpopular opinion no peculiar viewpoint no bludgeoning over the banality of extinction the only logical thing to do is head out to see some local band at a Chicago bar and see where the alcohol takes me I need the ammunition I need the fuel I need to make something happen the hard days of labor have diminished me through attrition and lack of euphemism but for right now, no matter how saturated I am of feeling and thought… whether I’m drunk on sleep, salacious on vulgarity, grieving with quills, vacant of ***** dreaming of gout, reading Géza Csáth, listening to Sass Dragons, burrowing under empty houses or fixing the plumbing for the woman down the hall. I still can’t coax the word out.
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65
Forbidden fruits hidden in the roof of my mind Its time to set fire to the mimes Larcenous pursuit of greater acclaim than is taped and pasted to your brain. Dripping copper pipes cold in the November light bright shadows gently crush the fabric of unreality. Love is a howitzer it can **** alot of people quickly and often. Love is a pool of amniotic fluid, it sustains and cushions, and soothes with warm comfort. Cardboard cutouts of cutthroat gangsters with gout, flout societies mores, with Cuban cigar smoke synthesis. Brandy snifterfull Awaiting the dinnerbell.
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Jul 25, 2012
Jul 25, 2012 at 10:04 AM UTC
Abstract Love
I don't take life too seriously more like popcorn and cotton candy My writing is raw and somewhat simple Not real acne, just a pimple Funny sometimes And sometimes very dark An awful lot to say About a broken heart Sometimes happy, sometimes sad Somtimes very angry and mad Ill always find something to write about Whether it's the ocean or love or a case of the gout I'll keep writing, I'll never hold back Unless they take me off my Prozac
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Jan 16, 2015
Jan 16, 2015 at 7:50 PM UTC
Goofy Stuff
Have you ever felt that no matter what, you wont quit Like if Cinderella put on the slipper and the shoe don’t fit. And her stepsisters barge in and say let me try and put. The slipper on again because I am sure it was the wrong foot. Now Cinderella is watching, and her heart is in the grip of fears. They say they'll break a foot if they have to make the slipper theirs. To make matters worse, the sister says they would all move on out. Except for Cinderella, they say she has to care for step mom’s gout. These sisters would be in the castle, while you remain a servant be I’m sure Cinderella hoped that something good happen urgently. None of the sister’s feet fit, and one sister wonders if she could wear it on her face? By any means she's determined to be sure the shoe fits someplace. Cinderella thought, Better the face, to cover you up so that other’s cant see. That thing on top of your neck that is a monstrosity. But the prince is puzzled, and examines the slipper very closely. It turns out there is a quarter stuck in it, and so he takes it out. When Cinderella tries it on again, the shoe fits and there is no doubt.
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Nov 3, 2017
Nov 3, 2017 at 5:30 PM UTC
Cinderella's Slipper
For God’s sake hold your tongue, and let me love, Or chide my palsy, or my gout, My five grey hairs, or ruin’d fortune flout, With wealth your state, your mind with arts improve, Take you a course, get you a place, Observe his Honour, or his Grace, Or the King’s real, or his stamped face Contemplate, what you will, approve, So you will let me love. Alas, alas, who’s injur’d by my love? What merchant’s ships have my sighs drown’d? Who says my tears have overflow’d his ground? When did my colds a forward spring remove? When did the heats which my veins fill Add one more to the plaguy bill? Soldiers find wars, and lawyers find out still Litigious men, which quarrels move, Though she and I do love. Call us what you will, we are made such by love; Call her one, me another fly, We’are tapers too, and at our own cost die, And we in us find the’eagle and the dove. The phoenix riddle hath more wit By us; we two being one, are it. So, to one neutral thing both sexes fit, We die and rise the same, and prove Mysterious by this love. We can die by it, if not live by love, And if unfit for tombs and hearse Our legend be, it will be fit for verse; And if no piece of chronicle we prove, We’ll build in sonnets pretty rooms; As well a well-wrought urn becomes The greatest ashes, as half-acre tombs, And by these hymns all shall approve Us canoniz’d for love; And thus invoke us: “You, whom reverend love Made one another’s hermitage; You, to whom love was peace, that now is rage; Who did the whole world’s soul contract, and drove Into the glasses of your eyes (So made such mirrors, and such spies, That they did all to you epitomize) Countries, towns, courts: beg from above A pattern of your love!”
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1.6k
The Canonization
For God’s sake hold your tongue, and let me love, Or chide my palsy, or my gout, My five grey hairs, or ruin’d fortune flout, With wealth your state, your mind with arts improve, Take you a course, get you a place, Observe his Honour, or his Grace, Or the King’s real, or his stamped face Contemplate, what you will, approve, So you will let me love. Alas, alas, who’s injur’d by my love? What merchant’s ships have my sighs drown’d? Who says my tears have overflow’d his ground? When did my colds a forward spring remove? When did the heats which my veins fill Add one more to the plaguy bill? Soldiers find wars, and lawyers find out still Litigious men, which quarrels move, Though she and I do love. Call us what you will, we are made such by love; Call her one, me another fly, We’are tapers too, and at our own cost die, And we in us find the’eagle and the dove. The phoenix riddle hath more wit By us; we two being one, are it. So, to one neutral thing both sexes fit, We die and rise the same, and prove Mysterious by this love. We can die by it, if not live by love, And if unfit for tombs and hearse Our legend be, it will be fit for verse; And if no piece of chronicle we prove, We’ll build in sonnets pretty rooms; As well a well-wrought urn becomes The greatest ashes, as half-acre tombs, And by these hymns all shall approve Us canoniz’d for love; And thus invoke us: “You, whom reverend love Made one another’s hermitage; You, to whom love was peace, that now is rage; Who did the whole world’s soul contract, and drove Into the glasses of your eyes (So made such mirrors, and such spies, That they did all to you epitomize) Countries, towns, courts: beg from above A pattern of your love!”
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45
I'm on one Been trapped in a buzz for four or six months Since that I've pulled a few stunts My mind, opposite judgement of a nun's So I tend to act rugged when it comes I'm on one Zapped down by these side effects Trapped now, take benzos to alleviate More and more as the effects depreciate Good for a few hours But I need to finish this report, so I give myself powers Amphetamines by all means I had a dream once, but now I cant sleep Don't use guns, to do this damage to myself Going through funds to do this damage to myself I'm on one Is it worth it in the long run? I've Seen what happens and it isn't fun But how can I do this job without them Be out of water, desperate as a trout, man Aches and pains I think I have the gout man Take pain killers, the real brain killers I'm on one Tipping over while typing these words Tripping over how I got this net worth Incognito, reputation with the best first Wish I could reveal, but I'd have no appeal They'd think I went bananas See I no longer have the fun that I had before hand Gleam in the Rover like the sweat against my forehead Blasting AC on max, thinking about paying tax But I already am, my kidneys show the facts Because I'm on one
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Aug 20, 2014
Aug 20, 2014 at 1:49 AM UTC
On One
I am this marble statue wait take me to the Pantheon let me there and give me breath movement like the fluid aqueducts. Bathe with me when no one's looking-- we'll escape those gladiators but gladiators had no choice either you see They were just people stripped of their pale, blue skin, and now they're entertainers battling the gout, aurora mirth of a Leo a fierce, unforgiving Leo-- and then the aqueducts run dry. So you can't bathe with me everybody's watching now Save me from this crackling boiling blistering mask; I don't want to be a statue Fleeing from the pantheon
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Feb 10, 2014
Feb 10, 2014 at 9:15 PM UTC
non sum fortis
There are certain things--as, a spider, a ghost, The income-tax, gout, an umbrella for three-- That I hate, but the thing that I hate the most Is a thing they call the Sea. Pour some salt water over the floor-- Ugly I'm sure you'll allow it to be: Suppose it extended a mile or more, That's very like the Sea. Beat a dog till it howls outright-- Cruel, but all very well for a spree: Suppose that he did so day and night, That would be like the Sea. I had a vision of nursery-maids; Tens of thousands passed by me-- All leading children with wooden spades, And this was by the Sea. Who invented those spades of wood? Who was it cut them out of the tree? None, I think, but an idiot could-- Or one that loved the Sea. It is pleasant and dreamy, no doubt, to float With "thoughts as boundless, and souls as free": But, suppose you are very unwell in the boat, How do you like the Sea? There is an insect that people avoid (Whence is derived the verb "to flee"). Where have you been by it most annoyed? In lodgings by the Sea. If you like your coffee with sand for dregs, A decided hint of salt in your tea, And a fishy taste in the very eggs-- By all means choose the Sea. And if, with these dainties to drink and eat, You prefer not a vestige of grass or tree, And a chronic state of wet in your feet, Then--I recommend the Sea. For I have friends who dwell by the coast-- Pleasant friends they are to me! It is when I am with them I wonder most That anyone likes the Sea. They take me a walk: though tired and stiff, To climb the heights I madly agree; And, after a tumble or so from the cliff, They kindly suggest the Sea. I try the rocks, and I think it cool That they laugh with such an excess of glee, As I heavily slip into every pool That skirts the cold cold Sea.
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1.4k
A Sea Dirge
There are certain things--as, a spider, a ghost, The income-tax, gout, an umbrella for three-- That I hate, but the thing that I hate the most Is a thing they call the Sea. Pour some salt water over the floor-- Ugly I'm sure you'll allow it to be: Suppose it extended a mile or more, That's very like the Sea. Beat a dog till it howls outright-- Cruel, but all very well for a spree: Suppose that he did so day and night, That would be like the Sea. I had a vision of nursery-maids; Tens of thousands passed by me-- All leading children with wooden spades, And this was by the Sea. Who invented those spades of wood? Who was it cut them out of the tree? None, I think, but an idiot could-- Or one that loved the Sea. It is pleasant and dreamy, no doubt, to float With "thoughts as boundless, and souls as free": But, suppose you are very unwell in the boat, How do you like the Sea? There is an insect that people avoid (Whence is derived the verb "to flee"). Where have you been by it most annoyed? In lodgings by the Sea. If you like your coffee with sand for dregs, A decided hint of salt in your tea, And a fishy taste in the very eggs-- By all means choose the Sea. And if, with these dainties to drink and eat, You prefer not a vestige of grass or tree, And a chronic state of wet in your feet, Then--I recommend the Sea. For I have friends who dwell by the coast-- Pleasant friends they are to me! It is when I am with them I wonder most That anyone likes the Sea. They take me a walk: though tired and stiff, To climb the heights I madly agree; And, after a tumble or so from the cliff, They kindly suggest the Sea. I try the rocks, and I think it cool That they laugh with such an excess of glee, As I heavily slip into every pool That skirts the cold cold Sea.
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48
Today we have few heroes Few live the life of Kings, Few go the extra mile to win The wondrous praise it brings. Most walk the path of averageness Most strive to play it safe, Where convention glides to keynote And contention is a waif. Nobody pulls the dragon's tail Nobody stretches out, To walk in shoes of restlesness, And lash the Devil's gout. Nobody grasps the horns of hell To cast care to the wind, Nobody sticks their neck out Making ego's soar rescind. Why do we lie in fallow turf Where textures are so bland? Why do we slouch in listlessness Each idle hand, in hand? Where is the pluck and passion Which allows our pulse to flail? Go find the guts and courage ....TO YANK THAT DEMON DRAGON'S TAIL! Marshalg @theBach Mangere Bridge 21 March 2010 Dedicated with love to my youngest fledgling, Solomon, who is venturing forth in his first business.
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Mar 20, 2010
Mar 20, 2010 at 7:37 PM UTC
Pulling the Dragon's Tail
"Run down the list, if you please." "OK. Doc, let's start with these: An earwig with shin splints, a worm with heartburn, A cockroach with a cold-" "He should have wrapped up like he was told!" "-A bee with hay-fever." "She never listens either..." "A centipede with a migraine, A fly with wing sprain And a woodlouse with suspected vertigo."   "Is that them all?" "Well, no. There's an elderly spider with a blister on his *** He can't spin a web to build a trap or home. There is a grub with possible depression, A slug with a stomach bug And a ladybird with gout."   "Too many greenflies, no doubt." "There's a butterfly with signs of hypochondria due to a swollen antennae, no matter what I say he's certain he is going to die. Now, the last is a delicate imposition: the Queen ant wants birth control, Because she is sick of her pregnant condition."
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Aug 12, 2014
Aug 12, 2014 at 7:39 PM UTC
Insect Vet
Remember all those peaceful nights in hazy candlelit glow, expressing all of the rights; factors you now pretend not to know. Expressing great gratitude at the partnership we had found, it’s funny how your attitude changes drastically when I’m not around. “I need to be selfish right now” you say it like it’s a new development, and your mind is blank to how I was alone in the room with an elephant. I did everything you could need without even a second thought, gave my sweat, tears and would occasionally bleed, and the one thing I asked for I never truly got. We made a life together, we dug a hole with two hands, you promised me it was forever, those were some very speedy time sands. I sacrificed all I could for you and still you obviously need more, I don’t know what it is you plan to do, I hope they discover whatever you’re looking for. The only thing you can say to me is that I could raise my voice, avoiding the issues that were clearly frustrating, ignoring the times I made another choice. Never listening to a possible solution, not taking one step in an alternate route, just instead labelling me toxic pollution, or a disadvantage like blindness or gout. “I need to make a life for myself” we both agreed on that for two years time, but unlike you for me, I was there to help, I thought of it as our life; not yours or mine. I did everything you could need, without even a second thought, I was tending and watering the soil for the seed, you were too occupied deciding on the *** We made a life together, planned a future for shared dreams, and you’ve turned me to a worn in sweater, that you picked apart the threads and seams. I loved you more than anyone, and put you above the sun in the sky, and out of nowhere you claim you’re done, abandoning me like a passerby. You act like you don’t even care, but six years is a very long time, to suddenly decide your not there, to pretend I’m not yours and you’re not mine. And while your robbing me of sleep currently I’m confident one day that you’ll lose yours, ‘cause as easy as it is to pretend the fault lies on me, I was opening every window and always holding open your doors
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Apr 11, 2019
Apr 11, 2019 at 9:40 PM UTC
The Olive Theory
Remember all those peaceful nights in hazy candlelit glow, expressing all of the rights; factors you now pretend not to know. Expressing great gratitude at the partnership we had found, it’s funny how your attitude changes drastically when I’m not around. “I need to be selfish right now” you say it like it’s a new development, and your mind is blank to how I was alone in the room with an elephant. I did everything you could need without even a second thought, gave my sweat, tears and would occasionally bleed, and the one thing I asked for I never truly got. We made a life together, we dug a hole with two hands, you promised me it was forever, those were some very speedy time sands. I sacrificed all I could for you and still you obviously need more, I don’t know what it is you plan to do, I hope they discover whatever you’re looking for. The only thing you can say to me is that I could raise my voice, avoiding the issues that were clearly frustrating, ignoring the times I made another choice. Never listening to a possible solution, not taking one step in an alternate route, just instead labelling me toxic pollution, or a disadvantage like blindness or gout. “I need to make a life for myself” we both agreed on that for two years time, but unlike you for me, I was there to help, I thought of it as our life; not yours or mine. I did everything you could need, without even a second thought, I was tending and watering the soil for the seed, you were too occupied deciding on the *** We made a life together, planned a future for shared dreams, and you’ve turned me to a worn in sweater, that you picked apart the threads and seams. I loved you more than anyone, and put you above the sun in the sky, and out of nowhere you claim you’re done, abandoning me like a passerby. You act like you don’t even care, but six years is a very long time, to suddenly decide your not there, to pretend I’m not yours and you’re not mine. And while your robbing me of sleep currently I’m confident one day that you’ll lose yours, ‘cause as easy as it is to pretend the fault lies on me, I was opening every window and always holding open your doors
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56
Gout. I have heard of this obscure disease Maybe in a Dicken's Novel once A disease of indolence and wealth Of red meat and alcohol Of excruciating pain with no cure. It winds up being in The top ten most excruciating conditions And my husband of 28 years has it big time We are neither indolent or lazy We don't drink hardly at all We have almost no risk factors Now this gout is chronic Driving my husband from sleep To the ER at 3 am this morning Try prednisone this time. Sigh. Aging is not fun There is something as bizarre As chronic gout Who would ever guess Such a weird thing When you are 25? I feel entirely powerless to help Other than to pick up the slack Do more chores, Bring him pillows or an ice pack. Enjoy your youth because We are feeling it at only 53 The Buddha says we will all suffer We all become older. We all get sick We all die The mastery lies In having pain, without it Turning into suffering But you can meditate a lifetime On one koan And still never achieve Liberation. When I was young I took it for granted Smooth muscles gliding past each other Tolerance for imperfect situations And a general ease about life. If I had to do it over again I would have appreciated My youth more than I did Now that it is gone, it is most Revered, like the Buddha. Maybe next lifetime
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Sep 18, 2015
Sep 18, 2015 at 4:03 PM UTC
Gout and Aging
Gout tongued, Mind numb, Van Gogh eared, Vanity blind, Tooo many I's, Not enough eyes. Angst lip deep In this guano cave That vibrates With unrequited LUV cantos .
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Sep 28, 2010
Sep 28, 2010 at 9:47 PM UTC
Guano Cave