"freaking" poems
People often ask me what love is
And I seriously don't know what it means
All I can think about is you
Your eyes, those brown eyes
Those eyes which saw me naked
You saw every scar on my body
Yet the only thing you said was
“You are beautiful”
Love, I am not beautiful
Scars, stretch marks, blood, wounds
Doesn't mean beautiful
I am not an art
Yet your lips kissed me
The way the sun kissed my skin every morning
Without a fail, without any doubt
You smiled.
And the only words that came to my mind was
**** this is trouble"
My love, your words hold me like a hostage
Trapped inside an empty box, finding a way out.
A way I can never ever get a glimpse of.
I knew that this love
Our love would last a lifetime
Or so I thought
We were torn apart by hatreds, insecurities, confusions
Maybe if it wasn't for distance
We would be still together, we could have worked it out
But maybe, no matter what decisions we'll make
We will still come to an end
Confused about the future
Insecure about other people
Hating each other
You, giving up
And me, craving for more
Craving for something that can fill up the hole inside my chest
I wanted you to stay forever, here beside me
But every time I would ask about it
You always said
"You deserve so much more"
You were once my everything
My other half
My partner in crime
You were someone so freaking important to me
You were the kind of mistake, I wouldn't mind repeating
I fell so hard for you
And guess what happened?
Love, I am broken
How many days, months, years
For me, to forget
That once upon a time
You were here
I was there
Hands holding tighter
Eyes locked to each other
Hearts that beat in a synchronizing manner
How much would it cost?
For the pain to stop
For the memories to abandon
For the feelings to fade
My love, I did not expect any of this
I didn't know that love can be deadly
A love that can force someone to commit suicide
That loving someone means tearing every part of yourself
Now, do you think I'm suicidal?
Love, do not be afraid
I'm not going to die
Being suicidal doesn’t mean killing yourself
Suicidal means I wouldn't mind dying
I kept on dying anyway
I kept on dying at the same place I thought was giving life to me
Because the day, you decided to give up on me
I already gave up on myself.
Oct 3, 2017
Oct 3, 2017 at 10:56 AM UTC
In The Prison Of Winter, No Rise, No Set
orbit nearly closed,
the radio announcer gleefully
chirruping, the twittering fool,
"only ** graves to X off till
spring"
the weight of the prior
the wait of the more
no matter how little
yet to come
too much insufferable
having suffered
multiple life sentences
you snit **** u don't know better,
ha, they don't even run
concurrently
there are no sunsets
in the girding grays
of harsher enough and words that fail me,
are the winners in the
winter of the ****
tests and hunts,
I have successfully
failed
of course I'm wrong you
petulant hobgoblin wringing
nyet from me you'll get no concession,
**** science,
there are no sunsets in the winter
and the sunrises,
short unsweetened,
light-less, less of less,
frigid glaring revealers
of dead trees
and deader
men
maybe in the Rockies,
perhaps the Alps,
wonderlands photoshopped,
pretty lies on the Internet BS posted
where I live,
wear the wear the weary
neath the sweat stink of layers of
unbundled choking hands,
winter's damage
assessed and assessment is
never overdue, payable in
immediacy
heating bills I can't pay,
a job that said no more of you,
unpretty please,
a woman who sorcerer-scarced herself
right freaking black magic quick,
trust me I have certified verified,
me and Nixon,
X's on the kitchen calendar,
there is daylight, there is mighty night,
almighty in long and colorless
and nothing in between,
but the smog stained slush of
smothered life
but definitely
no sunrises and no sunsets
watched all day from the
imprisoning kitchen window
which doubles
as a **** you
mirror
there are no, not any,
you know what,
cannot even say them,
the pipe dreams of better yet,
pipes that have beaten down
me and my
disassociated senses,
signed sealed and now delivered,
from the formerly known as
The Summer Man
Mar 14, 2015
Mar 14, 2015 at 9:39 AM UTC
Let me tell you the story of our serendipitous meeting, when we had been working not too far from each other for months but only just met. Let me tell you about how I was slacking off because I was bored of work, and tired of life in general. Let me tell you about how meeting you literally saved my life, for I had already made the plans and set the groundwork-my decision made long before and solidified more every day. Let me tell you about how you walked up oh so casually as I was talking to a mutual friend. And baby, let me tell you how I thought you were pretty freaking cute, and how I was so nervous and excited when you joined in our conversation. But let me tell you also how I showed myself to you from that very first meeting and you accepted all of me wholeheartedly. Because, let me tell you, I was at my very worst in those moments. And let me tell you how I walked away from that meeting with a genuine smile on my face, the first in years.
May 29, 2014
May 29, 2014 at 1:05 PM UTC
You look at me and you frown in jealousy.
Yeah, you secretly know I have swag.
Pants a little low, black and red shirt that says
“Sit down and learn from the Master,”
and a matching hat that states what you already know-
“FRESH”
You taste the bitterness of your words as you whisper lies to my back.
Yeah, you secretly know I don’t care.
Pants a little low, red and yellow shirt that says
“My swoosh is bigger than yours”
and a matching hat of who you think I resemble-
Superman
You hear the high pitched hissing that I’m doing well and hope that I fail.
Yeah, you secretly know I’ll succeed.
Pants a little low, black and blue shirt that says
“Just Did It”
and a matching hat that reminds you of what you need to do-
“OBEY”
You touch my strong shaped shoulders with yours and utter no apology.
Yeah, you’re secretly freaking out with excitement.
Pants a little low, blue and red shirt that says
“Don’t Bro Me If You Don’t Know Me”
and a matching hat with the best known bickering buddies-
Tom and Jerry
You smell my confidence in the aroma of chocolate axe and you pinch your nose.
Yeah, you’re secretly going to buy it later.
Pants a little low, black and white shirt that says
“Don’t sweat my swag”
and a matching hat that proclaims my feelings for you-
“I <3 Haters” and under the brim it says why-
“MOTIVATION”
Sep 10, 2014
Sep 10, 2014 at 10:17 PM UTC
* **HIM
Hello love, ya I just got into town
Well I just thought, you know
If you were going to be round....**
HER
The lover of my dark desire just calls.
He beckons with a smile.
"Come hither." whispers husky voice
alluring me with guile.
My heart compels me to comply.
My brain says "This is wrong."
And yet, I find my feet move toward
the magnet of his song.
**HIM
Did he ever wonder, about that one time
Does he know that those were mine
You know she would surely die
If I ever left her high and dry...**
HER
Shhh ... a finger on his urgent lips,
"the rest let's just forget"
I'm aroused by heated passion
igniting lust within ... I'm wet
**HIM
No one can know what tomorrow will bring
But for tonight my love, it's you for me
Behind the gas station I just couldn't wait
I put her up against wall in trance like state**
HER
Penned against the wall with parted lips
A kiss to potent to breathe
Not nearly private enough, still
my legs part, spread with his knee
**HIM
So willing as I pulled up her dress
Gasping for lust with erratic breaths
No need to be bashful when freaking at night
Three moons were shining vividly bright**
HER
I surrender. I give up.
Release me from the spell.
No recourse now exists for me
but succumbing to ecstasy, as well.
**HIM
Such passion for life
Breeds a hunger for lust
Fulfilling and satisfying
Yet I can't get enough
Her smell on my fingers
As I take to the road
Another memory
Worn into flesh and bone**
HER
{CODA}
A chill descends upon my heart
as I watch him drive away.
And as I've done so oft' before,
I wish for him to stay
And though I know he must go
back to his life there.
I close my eyes and smell his scent
dreaming of all we shared.
by
Traveler Tim
&
Cné*
Jul 6, 2017
Jul 6, 2017 at 4:26 PM UTC
The deafening house music
The crowd of colorful suits and gowns
And the shifting colorful lights
Trapped me in the ballroom
The tasty sophisticated food
The elegant decorations
And the freaking mandatory cotillion
Didn't stop me from ******** up
I should've been more social
I should've treated my date better
And I should've enjoyed the evening
But my fear and doubt won over me
Aug 13, 2014
Aug 13, 2014 at 7:47 AM UTC
Twirly, whirly, curly Q
Hair upon my head.
People say it’s beautiful.
To me, it’s merely dead.
Twirly, whirly, curly Q
Whenever I take a nap,
I look like lightening came down from heaven
And gave me a little zap!
Twirly, whirly, curly Q
Whether wind, rain, or snow.
Humidity is my enemy
I have a **** afro.
Twirly, whirly, curly Q
People stop and stare.
They ask me if it’s natural
As if they really care.
Twirly, whirly, curly Q
I think it’s rather boring.
You pay buckets to look like me
It’s so freaking annoying.
Twirly, whirly, curly Q
Girls tell me that they’re jealous.
But if they really knew the struggle,
They’d agree it’s rather hellish.
Twirly, whirly, curly Q
Straight hair would be a dream.
I’d brush and brush and brush my hair
And never even scream.
Twirly, whirly, curly Q
Alas, it’s here to stay.
But I guess that’s what makes me different,
And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Dec 5, 2012
Dec 5, 2012 at 6:49 PM UTC
Please wake up
I'm tired of you hiding your face
drowning in make up
drawing on a smile
cute dont you think?
live your life pretending your ugly
but you wont believe
perfection is unattractive
especially to guys like me
you live your life pretending
but where are the flawless things
a crooked tooth
makes you seem so amazing to me
it makes you different
special
the only one for me
so what if your an a cup
to tell you the truth not every guy wants the same thing
dont put us in a box
unlock the lock
dont throw away that key
dont give up on us
freaking ask us what you think
before you start starving yourself
thinking this is what we want
what we need
you dont need a big *** to be attrative
but hey thats just me
because i dont want perfection
I want the imperfect things
Dec 25, 2014
Dec 25, 2014 at 12:10 AM UTC
You know what I want?
I want a guy friend.
I have had two guy friends EVER
and I ended up technically dating both
...yeah, that ended badly.
Anyway,
they never really were
particularly close to me though,
when we were friends
we rarely talked
I couldn’t ask them guy stuff
I couldn’t text them random stuff
I couldn’t ask them for advice or vent to them
I wasn’t really close with them
What I want is for a guy
Around my age
So, high school age
To be my friend
Not my boyfriend
Not in a flirtationship
Just a friend
A guy in high school (so around my age)
Who I can send “hellooooo” to seven times
without them freaking out
like girls can do with their friends who are girls
A guy I can just talk to about life
Without drama
Without random ********
that always happens between girls
just a guy who can know me
inside out
who can be my “male influence”
who can tease me
who I can tease back
who I can rant to about my love life
and he can give a boy’s opinion and view on it
a guy who I can listen to
about his life
help him with his girl love life problems
a guy who is willing to trust me
a guy who will talk to me
a guy I can be REAL friends with
I just want a guy friend.
But I don’t know where to find one… :(
Nov 30, 2014
Nov 30, 2014 at 10:59 PM UTC
I have changed
My mind is full of stuff
I keep freaking out
And I don't know why
I've become a nightmare.
(m.v.a)
Aug 22, 2014
Aug 22, 2014 at 3:18 AM UTC
Weekends are supposed to be great
and weekdays a sore.
But lately I find my work a good chore.
For all the late weekend nights that we had, to all the bad coffee we always grab.
I want to forget how good those conversations made me feel.
Cause now every weekend I feel very ill.
And I so look forward to sleeping dead tired over a day's hardwork.
For forgetting you, me and the memories that always lurk.
Oct 15, 2016
Oct 15, 2016 at 6:43 AM UTC
no use in wondering if you saved my letters
or still look at photographs of me and sigh
because at the end of the day
when i’m wrapped up in sheets and blankets
wearing wooly socks and thick leggings and flannel
i’m still cold
and you’re still
so far away
in so many ways
and i miss you, i miss you, i miss you
i miss you
but i can’t tell you
and i won’t tell you
because even if you miss me
like i miss you
i’m the one
who tripped up the stairs
and even if you offered me a hand
(you didn’t, that’s okay)
i couldn’t take it
because i need to clean
the cuts on my knees
and wait for the bruises to fade
on my own
so while it seems that you’re fine now
with taking the stairs two at a time,
i’m still trying
to stand on my feet
and i miss you, i miss you, i miss you
i really freaking miss you
and i’m trying so hard
to be strong
Apr 24, 2014
Apr 24, 2014 at 10:12 PM UTC
This numbness and this pain
It eats me away
She said it was just a platonic game
My heart aches and bleeds
Just like my whole world
Can’t you see that I’m freaking hurt
No matter what I say or do
You won’t love me like I love you
Apr 28, 2015
Apr 28, 2015 at 5:57 PM UTC
I'm looking down watching what you do
As if i'm Uatu the Watcher
Or maybe I'm controlling you
Like the evil Puppet Master
See you have no control in life
This is my world and I'm just allowin you to live in it
It's like I'm eating up planets with Galactus
And creating chaos with Apocalypse
I'm in control of my actions
Choosing to do wrong
Only to wait until my redemption by the hands of the worthy
You're inside my head like Charles Xavier
Trying to find out my secrets
Only to discover that I keep my mental barriers on lock
With no key or code to unlock
Said passageway into my subconsious
Because I can block you without a helmet
Unlike Juggernaut or Magneto
I'm free to swing around with the good wall crawler known as
Scarlet Spider
Hah
And write up my own unique flows with no worries
I don't need the X-men or Avengers
Or my friendly neighborhood Spider-Man
To know that I have some great repsonsibilities on my shoulders
Weighing me down like a ton of bricks
And I don't need someone like Doom
Telling me how to be a leader
When we all know his leadership skills could use some attention
I'm an enigma
Close to what Deadpool would say is
Very unique
Before muttering towards the wall
As if it were his faithful audience
I know who I am
I know what I do
So simply put
I'm freaking awesome
Apr 24, 2013
Apr 24, 2013 at 11:19 PM UTC
I need to go running
to Pluto
I HATE EVERYTHING WITH A ****** PASSION
Just because I used to be a desperate psychopath
Doesn't mean I'm still a desperate psychopath
I AM A PERFECTLY RATIONAL HUMAN BEING
WHY ARE YOU BREATHING LIKE THAT GET OUT OF MY FACE
WAAAAAAAAAAAAit.
Come bAAAAAAAAAck.
I'M nOt The pRoblEm
I've changed
I mean
I thOuGht I did
Until I rEaliZeD that
EvErYOne iS A FREAKING IDioT
Sep 10, 2014
Sep 10, 2014 at 2:26 AM UTC
A
little
ANXIOUS
tonight,
oh
hell
be
honest
I
am
FREAKING
the
FU#%
out
PANICKY
cannot
breathe
lungs
are
tight
struggling
**A
N
X
I
O
U
S**
anxious...
anxious
anxious
ANXIOUS
Jun 11, 2014
Jun 11, 2014 at 11:16 PM UTC
It's almost been one year since we began talking,
Since we said, "Hello" for the very first time;
And that is okay because we went out and we had a good thing going,
But on December 6th,
we were split up;
We didn't talk for months on end,
No, not until April 20th;
When you finally realized that I was not going anywhere,
And we both realized that we could no longer go on fighting;
Even after we started talking,
I disappeared for a week,
scaring everyone;
When I got back,
the first thing I did was come looking for you
to apologize for everything that happened;
I put the blame on you,
and we didn't really talk again until July 28th;
When I put something about abortion on my Instagram story,
and I tagged you in it;
You were confused on why I did that,
I was freaking out about your reaction;
Once I explained what it was about,
We then had a four-hour conversation;
It started at 10 pm and ended at 2 am,
The longest we ever talked since December 6th;
And from that moment on,
We became better friends;
A friendship that once was something more,
Something that turned out not to be quite right;
Something that turned out not to work out,
Turned out that we just needed to work things out;
Two people who tried to be something great,
Wanted something different;
Would finally realize later on,
That it would be better if they were
new and improved;
Aug 22, 2018
Aug 22, 2018 at 10:59 PM UTC
Mrs Sharma is looking busy
Walking back from her yoga class
In Her right hand a bag full of potatoes
In her left hand, 2 kilos of onions
Its a freaking hot day in Delhi,
She stopped a taxi and hurried home
Aloo paratha her family's menu for today.
At home she went straight to her kitchen
Peeled and boiled the Potatoes
finely chopped Onion, coriander, ginger and chillies
Now where is the garam masala?
Here you are Mrs Sharma,
Salt Red Chili powder, Garam masala and some butter
Aloo Paratha with lots of butter,YUM YUM
Lunching at Sharma's home is Splendid
better than Mahesh Lunch Home in Juhu, Andheri.
Let's get started says Mrs Sharma
Let's make the dough
Make two chapati
add the filling to one chapati
and cover it with the second one.
Now Mrs Sharma rolls it slightly and heats it in the oven...
Let's ask Mrs Sharma,
Is food the elixir of life?
Yes very much she said
She feels like she is living for it.
As she spreads butter over the paratha
She says her mantra twice,
Eat healthy but don’t over eat.
She serves aloo paratha hot to her smiling kids
adds yoghurt to Mr Sharma's plate
she is so proud when she says to her family
Eat in moderation and eat healthy..
Smile and let's eat Aloo paratha Mrs Sharma's way...
May 18, 2013
May 18, 2013 at 1:46 PM UTC
You came back with rage again
You stupid, freaking, angry pen
I used to think that we were friends
But that seems to be coming to an end
You're an angry pen
A crazy pen
I don't like you one bit
You're a lazy pen
A stupid pen
A freaking baby nudist pen
And I Hate You
I want to write but you're too busy distracting me
With you're incorrect grammar and all your pointless babbling
I can't believe this is happening
How can a pen be mad at me?
I feel like a disciple and this pen is just a Sadducee
And I'm ****** off, again
But this time it's going to stay
All I wanted to do was play
But this pen led me astray
And I hate it
Every little click makes me cringe
Every little word I write makes me want more revenge
But lets face it...
What exactly would I do a pen?
Instead of taking it a part and putting it back together again
Well, it depends...
But honestly pens don't really make good friends
You rusty pen
You musty pen
You mother freaking ugly pen!
I hate you pen!
I breake you pen!
I can't wait to look down from Heaven and see your face in hell.
Sep 17, 2013
Sep 17, 2013 at 8:46 PM UTC
I've got a problem.
A habit, really.
Of freaking out over my reality.
I wake up one morning.
Not feeling so great.
My stomach's in a knot and my heart palpitates.
I scream. I cry.
My whole world's in a wry.
Looking for answers on the internet.
But then.
Something happens.
He takes me outside.
And everything's not as bad as I thought it was.
Not bad at all.
Mar 31, 2015
Mar 31, 2015 at 11:12 AM UTC
Every night I dream of pleasing you
in different ways.
Fantasizing of freaking you
dust till dawn, many days.
I'm not addicted
but your body, I badly crave.
Butterflies enter my heart
with the slightest gaze.
you spoke, I smiled
I fell in love with the sweetest hey.
This is not a hot new trend
of what’s cool or what’s in.
This a lovers story darling,
and you are the fairytale that I wish would never end.
Dec 1, 2014
Dec 1, 2014 at 2:20 PM UTC
Drift
Noun
A slow and gradual movement or change from one place, condition, etc. to another
Drifting
Verb
The ********* feeling in the world
It’s like, were still friends but we’re transitioning into acquaintances,
maybe even strangers in the near future
Daily conversations start to get rusty
And every word said feels like so much effort
Real talk, becomes small talk, and soon, maybe even no talk
Maybe we’ve just exhausted the list of things to talk about
And you know everything you wanted to know about me and I know everything I wanted to know about you
Or maybe you’ve reached your word limit or something, I don’t really know
But what most people don’t know about drifting is that
Drifting can be a one sided process
Like I’m here freaking out about our friendship and how we haven’t talked in days
And you're just there, probably not even noticing that we haven’t had a single conversation
If our friendship was a group work
I’d be that person doing everything, trying to fix things, putting so much effort
And you’re the one who seenzones the facebook group chat
It’s like we were on boats and suddenly a current rips us apart and if you just pull me in your boat everything will be okay
But no, the current is pulling me away from you and I am using all my strength to paddle back to you
And you don’t even notice and you even find the time to take a swim
Our friendship was a rubberband
You were holding one end, I was holding the other,
The rubberband stretched as the friendship grew, it got tighter and tighter
and suddenly, you decided that rubber bands weren't cool so you let go and i got slapped in the face by our friendship
It’s like wanting to chase you, but not wanting to chase you
Because it can come off as clingy
It’s like wanting to talk to you but I don’t
because I don’t want to disturb you
and that ***** cos you're the only one I want to talk to
but I'm probably not the one you want to talk to
so I just scratch the idea out of my head
and think of another way to talk to the person I once had endless conversations with
the hardest part in drifting is deciding what to do
should I let go?
Because they say that drifting is just a sign from God that you’ve learned everything you can from that person, right
And if I do let you go and we’re meant to stay friends aren’t we eventually going to find our way back to each other?
Or should I hold on, on this one-sided stretched rubberband of ours
and try to fix something that might not even be broken in your eyes
May 31, 2015
May 31, 2015 at 12:24 PM UTC
Anybody that is anybody knows the most fabulous and trendy accessory are socks.
Crew, No-Show, Knee high.
The ever versatile socks are the most righteous thing.
The Ancient Greeks may have had some dark ages, but they were the first people that we know of that thought,
Hey shoes are cool, but what if we made them more flexible and soft.
Thus the mighty sock was born.
Now there are some of you who may think completely different about socks.
Maybe they are boring, or annoying.
You are feeling the Albert Einstein side of socks. (He didn’t wear socks because he didn’t see the point, tragic huh?)
Well friends, though you may be genius you are completely idiotic.
Socks are little hugs wrapped around your feet. All day. They are like butterfly kisses that mae you smile every time you look down. What is better than that?
The answer is nothing.
Queen Freaking Elizabeth loved socks and went to the inventor of the knitting machine (which was originally created to make socks) to have custom socks made.
Not only are socks just incredibly wonderful and stylish, they were invented to help save the world… from sticky feet.
Socks help prevent your human sweat drops from seeping into your shoes, making a perfect nesting place for the teenage mutant ninja turtles. Disgusing
In conclusion, nothing can or ever will be more awe founding or perfect than socks
Feb 12, 2017
Feb 12, 2017 at 8:53 PM UTC