"freaked" poems
It's just a little crush--really.
But it was a secret
For a reason I chose not to tell.
My friend found out today.
I freaked out--really.
But it's just a little crush, right?
Not one to last the lifetime.
If it was, I didn't have to keep it secret.
Right?
Nov 16, 2014
Nov 16, 2014 at 8:26 PM UTC
I am quick to cry and to anger
and people think I'm strange.
They don't see how hard I try to control it,
I know I'm seen as deranged.
Emotions can be overbearing
and it's difficult to stay quiet
when someone upsets me
It's simply not easy to hide it.
I guessed for a long time that the issue was with me.
But I thought I could watch maybe learn their technique.
For keeping a cool head when things get heated.
Instead of losing it over nothing and feeling totally defeated.
I was wrong it turned out.
I don't have breaks I have border as in
borderline personality disorder.
I got a diagnosis
and was incredibly afraid
that people would treat me like someone
who'd contracted the plague.
While I wasn't right,
I wasn't totally wrong,
mental illness is unfortunately
still mostly ignored.
If I was unwell with a headache,
people would ask
'Are you okay?'
'Here I've got Panadol Actifast.'
But when the ills
In the mind and I say
'I'm feeling down'
9 times out of 10 people get freaked out.
So it's tough when you're shamed
For having a disorder
A lot of normal people suffer
So could your son or daughter.
So next time you hear someone say
'I'm feeling down.'
Do me one favour
and please,
just don't freak out.
It's hard enough already dealing
with this day to day
without having friends
turn their backs and walk away.
Nov 17, 2014
Nov 17, 2014 at 12:02 AM UTC
***I really like Christmas
It's sentimental, I know, but I just really like it
I am hardly religious
I'd rather break bread with Dawkins than Desmond Tutu, to be honest
And yes, I have all of the usual objections
To consumerism, the commercialisation of an ancient religion
To the westernisation of a dead Palestinian
Press-ganged into selling Playstations and beer
But I still really like it
I'm looking forward to Christmas
Though I'm not expecting a visit from Jesus
I'll be seeing my dad
My brother and sisters, my gran and my mum
They'll be drinking white wine in the sun
I'll be seeing my dad
My brother and sisters, my gran and my mum
They'll be drinking white wine in the sun
I don't go in for ancient wisdom
I don't believe just 'cos ideas are tenacious it means they are worthy
I get freaked out by churches
Some of the hymns that they sing have nice chords but the lyrics are dodgy
And yes I have all of the usual objections
To the miseducation of children who, in tax-exempt institutions,
Are taught to externalise blame
And to feel ashamed and to judge things as plain right and wrong
But I quite like the songs
I'm not expecting big presents
The old combination of socks, jocks and chocolate is just fine by me
Cos I'll be seeing my dad
My brother and sisters, my gran and my mum
They'll be drinking white wine in the sun
I'll be seeing my dad
My brother and sisters, my gran and my mum
They'll be drinking white wine in the sun***
**And you, my baby girl
My jetlagged infant daughter
You'll be handed round the room
Like a puppy at a primary school
And you won't understand
But you will learn someday
That wherever you are and whatever you face
These are the people who'll make you feel safe in this world
My sweet blue-eyed girl
And if, my baby girl
When you're twenty-one or thirty-one
And Christmas comes around
And you find yourself nine thousand miles from home
You'll know what ever comes
Your brother and sisters and me and your Mum
Will be waiting for you in the sun
Whenever you come
Your brothers and sisters, your aunts and your uncles
Your grandparents, cousins and me and your mum
We'll be waiting for you in the sun
Drinking white wine in the sun
Darling, when Christmas comes
We'll be waiting for you in the sun
Drinking white wine in the sun
Waiting for you in the sun
Waiting for you...
Waiting...**
***I really like Christmas
It's sentimental, I know...***
Dec 26, 2012
Dec 26, 2012 at 12:33 PM UTC
I took too many busporine,
But I'm still anxious.
I'm still ******* freaked.
I'm still nervously shaking.
I'm still sputtering about.
I'm still worried why you haven't opened my message.
I know this whole thing is new.
I know you're probably sleeping.
I know you have a life outside of me.
I know you sometimes need a break from me.
But my anxiety doesn't.
My anxiety doesn't get that you're busy.
Anxiety doesn't get that you're sleeping.
Anxiety doesn't get that maybe you just want some space.
Anxiety doesn't get that I didn't do anything wrong,
And that your feelings for me haven't changed.
Anxiety is scared.
Anxiety is panicking.
Anxiety is popping one too many pills.
Anxiety is crying and trying not to cut again.
Anxiety is worrying that you've found someone else.
Anxiety is worried that you're out with them now and just ignoring me until you're ***** later tonight.
Jesus Christ, Anxiety.
Give me a break,
Quit giving me a battle.
Jesus ******* Christ, Anxiety.
Take a deep breath,
Try to stay rational.
Jesus ******* Christ, Anxiety.
I'm trying to salvage a relationship here,
And ruin the one I have with you.
May 21, 2018
May 21, 2018 at 3:41 PM UTC
if i was a girl i wouldn’t shave i’d be a tomboy ballerina with upper body muscles maybe a **** or surfer girl smell a little subtle i’d be tough learn to take a punch but i’d also be fragile sensitive intelligent i’d dress down like female ducks gray beige brown yet wear thongs boots bikinis heals girl stuff if i was a girl i’d be freaked out by ************ and even more freaked out by menopause depressed i lost my wetness if i was a girl i’d flash *** crotch drive boys wild be a complete nymphomaniac **** until i found the right guy he’d be strong gentle patient caring with a cute ***** i don’t care how big if i was a girl i’d learn to give blow jobs really good acquire a taste for ***** and play that skill as my trump card if i was a girl i’d find a job roll up my sleeves be a hard worker impress my managers become a manager quit i would find another type of work maybe a writer painter if i was a girl i wouldn’t compete with men i’d simply be more creative smarter if i was a girl i’d want to give birth as scary profound as that might be i’d want to be a mom a nurturing loving attentive mom i’d garden cook sew clean stand by my man my children devoted to home and hearth if i was a girl i’d cry a lot but not in front of anyone if i was a girl i wouldn’t want to become an old woman surrounded by other old women taking care of sick old men or no old men if i was a girl i’d want to die instantly in an accident or in bed reaching ****** age 82 if i was a girl
Sep 29, 2010
Sep 29, 2010 at 7:37 AM UTC
It wasn't quite a party.
More of a kickback
just ten or twelve friends
drinking and smoking from a huge glass ****
all of them huddled around the computer
watching funny videos on YouTube
of people getting hurt and ****
The guy at the controls
went to a website
ratemyboobs.com or ratemytits.com
something like that
and the four girls there
all moaned and groaned
saying they didn't want to see **** like that.
The guys all laughed
and continued rating the pictures of *****
as they came up one by one
when all of the sudden
a picture of a guy holding his ****
came up on the screen.
The girls finally had a reason to laugh
the guys were all grossed out
but one guy more than anyone else
he freaked out.
"What the **** bro?! I don't wanna see guy's ***** I'm not gay!"
"Relax man...no one said that you were. Chill out."
He looked like he was hyperventilating and about to
break out in ******* hives.
"But that's gay **** bro! I'm not gay, so I don't wanna see that **** ****
He stomped off to the backyard
lighting a cigarette
you could still hear him out there
shouting over and over
"I'm not gay. I'm not ******* gay!"
he yelled, pacing back & forth.
Everyone around the computer
didn't know what to say
so they just chuckled quietly
and then someone said it.
What every person there was thinking,
"Wow. That's sad. He's totally gay."
one of the girls said.
"Yup. Totally gay..." the guy at the computer said cracking up.
He rated the **** picture
ten out of ten
and moved on
to more ****
Jan 11, 2012
Jan 11, 2012 at 9:10 PM UTC
Your truck knows it all
It contains our whole relationship
It knows the beginning, middle and end
I loved seeing those lights
Knowing you were driving to come pick me up
It made me really happy
And sometimes
Even a little nervous
But in a good way
In the summertime
We had the windows rolled down because it was hot
In the winter it was cold
But we'd find a place to park and make it July warm
I almost lost my innocence in that passenger seat
We did so much in that truck
We talked
Laughed
Shared
Kissed
Argued
Cried
Stressed
Freaked out
Held each other
Loved
That truck knows it all
Those camouflage seat covers still hold our passionate sweat
The drooping brownish red ceiling absorbed all our words, feelings and keeps them there
Even today
The plastic in front of the gas gauge doesn't feel as whole without one of my pictures covering it
The center console probably still holds one of my notes
Saying how much I love about you
Who knows, the glovebox still may hold my garter
The lace with a tear on it from prom
When the truck heard you say you didn't care anymore
That truck holds everything
All the feelings and emotions
Maybe not so close to the surface anymore
But it will never forget the stuff you've let yourself unremember
That maroon Chevy still loves me
Even if you don't.
Oct 21, 2013
Oct 21, 2013 at 1:02 AM UTC
( )
( )
< < ( ) > >
< >
< >
< >
/-------\
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
( oh god ! It's almost time to start the poem ! --- I'm getting nervous )
,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,~,
when I was a kid I got lost and I totally freaked out
when I was finally calmed down by a neighbor
I realized I was never more than 3 or 4 houses from my house
I had been there many many times
It just looked different on a real sunny day
••
They all called me LITTLE JEFFY
///
God was I a cute kid !
//
And smart !
•
Jesus was I a smart kid !
/////
//// ////
In those days there was no television
So we all knew each other
And did this thing called
Playing with each other
••
How things have changed
Now kids play video games or have *** with themselves
While pretending to have *** with another !
What weird kids !
••
•• ••
=0=
( see ! I'm zipping right along with poem now !
Wow !
Look at me go ! )
••
The trouble with Americans is that they are all ********
But god loves them anyway some say but I don't really think so cause why should he bother loving an ******* ?
///
we are the dreams that stuff gets made from
• •
Lying in the manger with you for awhile
// //
Feb 9, 2015
Feb 9, 2015 at 5:13 AM UTC
Being attacked En masse by zubat
Oh excuse me I meant Woobat
Send out my Rapidash
Its a pity it knows flash
I leave a trail of Pokes behind
This is what happens when you grind
Saving up for an expert belt with a buckle
So i can give it to my shuckle
I run into a snorlax
Its ok i relax
I have 99 ultra *****
And one good Stalls
Catch him in no time
Ran into a female Mister Mime
Freaked out i back up into little caterpie
But I already have a butterfree
Spray some repel
Avoid the weepingbell
Make it back to pallet town
Gary and i ready to throw down
Mar 16, 2011
Mar 16, 2011 at 1:12 PM UTC
I swear I hate computers
what happened to antique typewriters
Yah computers are helpful and all
but what happens if they crash
or the hard drive erases
what happens if your life depended on computers
and then your computer freaked out?
If you asked me, I would love to be sitting in an old fashioned
office, typing away at an antique royal!
oh well I'll live not like I can convince the world to agree with me...
Apr 24, 2010
Apr 24, 2010 at 3:27 PM UTC
I always walk up the stairs with a cup of tea filled to the brim. Not even walking just taking small steps periodically just in case the tea spilled. Sometimes I made it to the top and sometimes I spilled it and I would have to come back downstairs, go the the kitchen, get a paper towel, wipe up the mess, throw the paper towel away and try again.
It was a very tedious Task.
My mother used to yell at me for the times I get too lazy to clean up the mess and just allow the tea to dry up on the floor to stick.
When I was twelve I realized how many times I allowed the tea to dry up. Most of the time I didn't even care if all the tea spilled by the time I got to the last staircase. The boiling hot tea spilling on my feet and the carpet and the granite didn't bother me. My mind was wayward- somewhere unknown. My thought process didn't care to think about my mother after a hard days work coming home to yell at her old enough daughter to stop drinking upstairs. She used to get so mad at me sometimes wondering why I always said "I don't care,".
She used to despise me for it, and I did too.
Maybe I liked how the tea burned my feet causing me to walk faster, maybe I liked the pain. Maybe I was too busy to care about the abundance of spills maybe I wasn't. Maybe I just didn't care.
The whole world stopped spinning for me but my mind didn't. I loved leaving a trail of sweet hot tea for me to follow again and again, my mother didn't.
Finally my mother broke all the teacups and threw away all the tea we had in the house. In all honesty I freaked out. I could've ripped the whole house from its foundation and throw it toward the horizon. I could've take matches and burn the place down letting its ashes fill the toxic sky. I could've done all of that.
But I didn't. I disintegrated into my covers and let my bed seep me in, like tea leaves brewing. I was brewing.
And like the perfect cup of tea, I finally became that dark, rich color with the perfect amount of milk and sugar, placed onto a saucer that was the right size. I the ridges kept me in place and the walk upstairs wasn't so bad anymore.
Jun 22, 2015
Jun 22, 2015 at 9:19 PM UTC
He got expelled this time.
He wasn't sent to
In-school suspension
Or lunch detention
Or the counselor's office.
He was expelled from
Fairfax County Public Schools.
And his friends all freaked.
They sat outside the school
Every morning
And wouldn't go in
To protest.
They signed a petition
That called him a
"Well rounded student"
And
"Well loved by the student body."
I didn't love Brian.
I hated Brian.
Brian was the kid
Who always
Made the class
Stay late.
He was the kid who
Went through the halls
Grabbing peoples butts.
He was the kid that
All the guys wanted to be
And all the girls wanted to have.
And instead of sending him off
To West Point
Where he would have to
Shave his Bieber hair and
Follow the rules for once,
The county revoked the expulsion.
And to me
It seems like
A celebrity murdered someone
And because a thousand fan letters were sent in
They got to go free.
May 27, 2013
May 27, 2013 at 9:50 PM UTC
I just freaked out
What the **** was that all about
You
that's who
My first date since your death
I stood on my doorstep
it took a moment to catch my breath
I wanted to run back inside
to go under my quilt, sob and hide
Guilt plagues me
but my determination aides me
The first step is done
but this was only a dry run
Feb 22, 2015
Feb 22, 2015 at 12:59 PM UTC
Its about one in the morning
I know I have to get up at 7
I wish I was knocked out snoring
I told myself I’d go to the gym at 11
I guess I can never keep a promise to myself
There are so many things I should do
But I just put **** off and keep it on a mental shelf
Why can’t I ever follow through
I told myself I’d tell you I liked you weeks ago
But then I figured that you wouldn’t care
You’re always with your friends for all I know
If I told you I bet you’d just stare
I told myself I’d get in shape this year
But surprise I actually gained weight
Being fat again is the worst thing I fear
This week I’ve tracked all the calories I ate
I told myself I’d try to stay in a relationship
But two weeks in I freaked and ended it
I got too annoyed kissing your lips
I can’t pretend to be interested in this ****
I told myself if other people are happy dating
Then I could probably be happy too
But I’m not comfortable with anything more than a fling
Monogamy just isn’t something I can do
I told myself I’d get my **** together this time
Yet I’m snorting addies at a Philly party
Then proceeding to cry about how I’m
Such
A
Piece
Of
****
Feb 1, 2016
Feb 1, 2016 at 1:31 AM UTC
All this pain, studies and pressure.
It's getting frustrating and stressful but I must do better.
Just a couple more days until, hm......ahm doomsday is here.
The days that CXC falls upon us, will we be happy or full of fear.
But God is good Mock Exams are coming, HOORAY!! I'll prepare to study.
I would be ashamed to waste five years of hard work.
A greater shame to let not only myself down but those who had faith me.
Because many have tried and failed the work,
But a lot have passed boy hmm.... you don't have a clue.
Stay focus and calm as you can.
Because the failure or success in your life, is your number one determination.
So ladies and gentle men get ready for war,
Because we have to **** them papers, we have to **** it for sure.
Duh get scared and duh get freaked out,
Freaked out!...... of what....CXC nah that should be like a KFC take out.
And remember to pray and give God thanks for life,
Today isn't the only day you did something he didn't like.
So just in case he choose to take it back in spite.
Be patient, for the sun is for the day,
And the moon for the night.
Don't rush it, VICTORY will come when the time is right.
Feb 7, 2018
Feb 7, 2018 at 2:55 PM UTC
She knew, right afterward.
Amazing.
She knew.
I took her word for it.
Oo-Oo-Oocyte!
The largest, roundest cell
Females have. It is
Visible to the eye
Clothed or nakey.
With the largest surface
Volume in relation to
Her cell-fluid-gorged surface.
One is produced ea/month.
One?
Yowza.
Me?
Millions of the little buggers.
Millions! Yeah! THAT’s
The ticket!
And tiny those little tickets are.
Hardly more than a nucleus with
That powerhouse of the cell,
The Mitochondrial outboard motor,
Propelling the tail.
The smallest and straightest
Human cell
(Cool tail, though)
The juxtaposition is kind
Of amazing.
Large vs. small.
Roundest vs. straightest.
Tail-propelled nucleus
Vs.
Moon-shaped cytoplasm.
The opposite, embryologically-
Speaking.
And she was positive,
POSITIVE
We’d conceived.
Roughly 9 months later,
I was there. Physically.
The rest of me was
Possibly sunning in Togo.
Kind of freaked me out,
The birthing process,
The first time.
My son. My baby boy.
Our child.
5/28/91.
I’m more proud and more
Astonished at the man
My little baby has grown into
With each passing day.
Golden child, beginning
Life with blonde hair,
Almost white, darkening
As he grew into the French-
Indian DNA of his
Mom’s side of the family.
He is so much like
His Mother, for which
I’m very happy,
Because his Mother
Is simply amazing
And worthy of an entire
Slew of poems just
To describe her.
And I’ve another
Golden child
Gold blessing vein running
True and deep, different
Than his older brother
Of seven years,
Yet similar, opposite in
Some ways, having grown strong
As the little plaything for
His older brother’s friends,
Making him very tough,
Strong as a team of oxen,
A work ethic he inherited
From Dad, Mom, Brother
Yet fitting together as
Loving siblings can
When they have God
At the center of their lives.
Thank You, God, for
My two sons.
I’m protective, but I know
They do not belong to me.
They are Your blessings
To my wife and me.
They are Your blessings
To this world, set in motion,
Wound up to take what they see
And make it better, and
To prevent it from getting worse.
They will do Your work.
We were the biological
Vessels that delivered
Them from Your world
Before
To this world,
Now.
Mar 1, 2013
Mar 1, 2013 at 5:12 PM UTC
Vacant. Empty. Twisted. Lacking.
Chills shoot though my body filling the cracks whatever is left
Let go of the Meaning of LIFE and one is lost
Worried. Angered. Freaked. Spinning.
Words jotted down upon an empty page to show giving proof to rage
Reality is no kind reminder in correction of humanness
Stupidity. Irony. Pathetic. Foolish.
These eyes have absorbed from the outside world all which is meaningless
Vibrant life left behind to retrieve if one is wise
Hope. Love. Joy. Peace.
Never take the God-given gifts taken for granted or hard ways shall teach
Throw them aside as ******* and despair will find what's left
Trash. Pathetic. Waste. Shameful.
Such trash is how I perceive some to view my vehemency
No integrity do they see in what these eyes hold scared
Purity. Integrity. Honesty. Valiancy.
Which spring from the soul and mind diluted from ones first breath in the flesh
Access to God diluted from what cannot be achieved
Sovereignty. Omniscience. Omnipresent. Agape.
Witness madness for what God has been met first hand is just in righteousness
Full of grace and mercy to those who Seek Him
Loving. Wise. Holy. Eternal.
To those Who serve Him He gives of Himself correcting those He loves
Comfort is naught promised for character is His measure
Sanctification. Tried. True. Loyalty.
Purifying His people through teaching His ways is the foremost goal
As choice gold refined and proved accordingly
Oct 8, 2011
Oct 8, 2011 at 10:24 PM UTC
loud
so genuine it seems fake
temper
cries easily
animal lover
talkative
passionate
overly sweet
accidentally inconsiderate
cant whisper to save my life
non confrontational until angered
giving
creative
hard working
obnoxiously loud and annoying
liberal
avoids messy situations until i HAVE to face them
flamboyantish
scared
loves being feared / having power
hates directly hurting people
anxious
too freaked to apologize
very touchy
hyper
Jan 24, 2017
Jan 24, 2017 at 2:39 AM UTC
Life is not easy like almost everyone thinks it is. My mom always told me that life isn’t easy, kids just have it easy. I didn’t believe her, I fought with her all the time, and sometimes it got physical. I hated living with my mom, and I wanted to have my own rules, like almost every teenager. So I started leaving and going with my friends, and running the streets all day and all night, not going to school, not even caring what I was missing, I just knew I was free. I had no rules, no consequences, and nothing going for myself.
I was a goody-goody, I did the right things, I went to school, I didn’t do anything to harm myself. I remember those days, and I thrived for a do-over. I've heard things, that I wouldn't dream of repeating to my mother. I've seen things that no other person should have to see. I've seen people doing things that I prayed every night, that I wouldn't get caught up in. I worried that I would make all the wrong choices, and mess my entire life up, beyond return. I thought I knew what I was doing, but I guess my mom was right. School had no value to me anymore. I didn't want to be in this town I'm supposed to call "home”. I didn't want to be anywhere. I bluntly admitted to my mother that I was contemplating suicide.
My mother made me move with my dad in Buckfield, and I went. I went back to my moms for the balloon festival. But, two days before the festival, my dad made me come back to his house. I told my dad that I was going back to my moms, him and his girlfriend freaked out. They started restraining me from leaving, by grabbing the collar of my shirt, and therefore choking me. My dad pushed me to the floor, sat on top of me, shoving my face into the floor, and was screaming “What kind of drugs are you on?” I’m going to be 100% honest, I have been verbally, emotionally, physically, and sexually abused. I’ve been slapped across the face by my mom’s ex-husband, on multiple occasions. He’s almost given me a concussion, from shoving me against the wall. Like I have said, life is not easy… Life is not fair. But, had I not been through everything that I have been through, I wouldn’t be the way I am. I may have gone through hard times, a lot of them at that, but it’s made me strong and independent. I’ve had some really good friends who support and love me, I have had really good family friends that have helped me be who I am today. I am now really close to my mom, I am home all the time, I go to school all day everyday. In the past couple months, I turned my life around. Don’t make the same mistakes I did. Life is not easy that way, you need school, you need friends and family. As much as you may think you don’t need family, you do. It’s is what helps you get through your everyday struggle.
Jun 9, 2015
Jun 9, 2015 at 8:17 AM UTC
I recently
got into
a little kundalini yoga
and joined
the Zen group
on Facebook,
and it was like
being plugged into
an electric socket.
I didn't sing
the body electric,
I freaked out.
Panic, anxiety,
and mania ensued.
This ****
can be dangerous.
I saw my doctor
and he gave me
more medicine.
Now, I'm fine.
Whew.
Jun 14, 2013
Jun 14, 2013 at 7:02 PM UTC
I spoke to a wasp today. And he told me his story. He spoke to me about his childhood, and watching his own family being murdered. It was a bright and warm Friday evening. His father had ventured out and flew among the humans that lived in the home of his home. The smell of liquor permeated the air, as did the barbeque that was nearly too done. He drew close to the man of the home, just to watch and observe the scene. The man didn't like it too much. So he swatted him. It didn't hurt him, however, but it did confuse him. And in his confusion he landed upon the man and planted his stinger within him. The man slammed his hand down, cursing as the wasp's father's guts bled out. There was nothing the wasp could do but watch. The woman of the house asked if the man was ok. The man cursed once more and slammed his glass on the ground. The woman became upset and demanded to know why. The man had no answer. He merely just grabbed a gas can, took another ...swig of liquor, and walked up to the wasp's home and began dousing it in gasoline. The woman freaked out, afraid of what was about to happen. The man merely cursed at her as well and shoved her to the ground. When she tried to get back up he kicked her in the face. The blood poured. The wasp's home was now soaked in a lethal liquid. The man had a sinister grin as he glanced at his crying and bleeding woman lying on the ground, and he laughed as he lit a match and threw it on the wasp home. The nest went up in flames, and shortly after the home of the man did too. The little wasp escaped, unable to save the lives of his screaming family being burnt alive. The man merely laughed; the woman lay crying; the nest burnt to ashes; the house burnt down. So now the little wasp is all grown up. And when I asked what he wants to do with his life, all he replied was, "I want to sting people...because it seems that is all every creature is meant to do." ♥
May 23, 2013
May 23, 2013 at 11:13 PM UTC
1
Well, I've dated a few guys, sure -
you know, being Ms Hyphen
I'm sociable, like to bring people together
that sort of thing
So I dated that guy Exclamation Mark
and what the hell, he was shouting all the time!
He's just too excitable, not my type
Sure, Comma was more sedate
but a little too slow for me, you know
So I gave guys like Inverted Commas and Parenthesis
a try - but hell, they were always trying to frame me
So I like said to myself, maybe I'll try someone else
from the Mark family, and woooh! - this guy
was like questioning me all through dinner
and I was like thinking to myself:
*What's with this guy? Where does he work?
At the NSA or FBI or what?*
I guess you know who I'm talking about
Well, I dated all the other guys too
like Semi-Colon and then Colon
but you know, one liked to separate;
and the other was always out
with his smartphone
listing things I said
2
So I nearly gave up dating when I thought -
*Hey what about Dash?
That's a dashing fellow surely
and he seems to be just like me*
(except he is - as is apt for a guy - long)
but he was just like Semi-Colon -
always separating people
You got to bring people together
in this world, you know;
that's what this world needs
Yes, I dated Full Stop too
but he was always getting me to stop
and besides, he said his alias was Period -
now that freaked me out, you know
*Hey, what kind of guy walks around
with a name like Period?*
I'll tell you like who's the worst guy to date, OK -
that's Apostrophe:
O listen darling, was he ever so possessive!
3
Well, I'll give my dating career a break -
maybe come next year,
I might try dating 2nd of February
Oct 3, 2014
Oct 3, 2014 at 6:34 AM UTC
I woke up feeling frustrated today
a part of me just exploded
I couldn't figure out what the hell was wrong with me
so I freaked out and cried
I wouldn't let anyone be there for me
I just wanted to be left alone
As I went for a walk for six hours straight
I didn't even pick up my phone
People get mad at me because they can't understand me
not even my Mother does
The way I act, the things I wear
I do just because
I don't go out to impress anyone
if anything people should impress me
I don't let others in so easily
so thank your lucky stars if you know me
I'm not hear to make things easier for others
I'm a challenge you can't stand
I'm intimidating for a reason
I don't let any guy just hold my hand
I woke up in a very ****** off mood
it happens from time to time
If you can't handle me at my worst
then your not a good friend of mine.
Aug 13, 2015
Aug 13, 2015 at 8:53 PM UTC
Unworthy-
31/January/2021
1.22Am
That day when you asked if you could tell me a secret
I was so excited,
But to be honest I freaked out.
I was so unworthy of that weight.
My simple heart cannot hold such pressure.
The weight you are carrying.
The knowledge that you've earned.
I felt so unworthy of the words that would spill out of your lips.
That day I felt something different.
I thought I knew knowledge,
I thought I knew how to take life as easily as a floating feather.
I thought I knew how to take my problems and put it down with my fists.
I thought I knew what is love.
But that day your eyes told me a different story.
Your eyes showed me a story of a thousand nights.
A forest of thousand lives.
A Library with thousand books.
A universe of thousand skies.
Your eyes asked for trust that day
It asked for a chamber with a lost key,
Locked away and cannot be found for eternity.
But I am just a human.
Unworthy of the treasury you wanted to give.
Illiterate to the feelings you wanted to share.
And unworthy of your trust.
Feb 23, 2021
Feb 23, 2021 at 4:03 AM UTC
I am awoken by a nagging in my head
its in my mothers voice
the urgency,
I don't know what for, its 5 am.
my submission doesn't speak.
I fill the air with the sound
of my nonsense, a rambling of dreams,
"dont burst the bubble, burst the bubble, burst the-"
a never ending melody.
Because there is nothing louder than this, I have wanted to crawl out of my skin long before I knew it was mine.
And theirs, not mine entirely, composed of DNA so imperfect
even the gods would've laughed.
If you ever want to **** something up to the point its unrecognizable,
give it to me, look what I did to my own potential.
Squander doesn't begin to cover it, almost out of spite.
and i must stop it before it reaches my eyes
it has a certain way of clouding them over
and I just dont want people to realize
that I am swallowing a lump
at the back of my throat
what seems like forever
trying not to get my eyes to burn or
dig my nails deep into someones throat
just to feel their artery and scream
"YOU ******* FEEL IT DONT YOU?
ARE YOU ALIVE? ARE YOU REALLY HERE?
YOU ARE ALIVE, ALIVE ALIVE!."
Then place the sharp bits of my nails
against my skin, hard
and not feel
anything
I struggle with self control
especially with ***
and drugs
and alcohol.
I yell too often, never loud enough to make them hear me.
I am afraid of my own voice
telling people to shut up
Jack knows its not a good thing if I whisper
last time I did I said
"I don't have a pulse, I cant find my pulse."
Before I freaked out and smashed that vase against the wall
and laughed at what a sad broken cliche I have become.
My anger came out in sputtering sobs
And he tried to hold me
because that's what people do in movies
cue the background music
but I didn't let him because I was never any good at acting,
and he never got mad when I hit him
I can hear that "Sshhhh" at the back of
my ear
Forever.
and I could wince at my own humiliation if I gave a ****
I wont lie it was awkward he sounded scared
"aww dont c-c-ry"
thought I saw a tear there too
Dec 1, 2014
Dec 1, 2014 at 1:04 PM UTC