Hey
Let's start a conversation here, again. Because I'm lonely and could really use a friend
Someone that wouldn't mind if I sat there and whined
Because god knows I could really use the time to break down and cry
But I move on
One foot forward
Next step onward
And I survive
But to live just to live and lead an empty life
How sad, so I suppose I fill it with strife
And then I'm flusterred and alone and no-one's around to hear me groan
And I just sit there, alone, thinking about my solitutde
And I lie to myself
Say it's what I've always wanted
Say it's what I really need
Some time away from the people in a life I do not live
And time away from myself and away, just away
And then what

Pause for a moment please
Take a breath for me, please
Ever feel the wind beside you? The air fill you up and pour itself into you? Ever feel the suns rays dancing on your skin? Seen the glow of the moon and yearned for an escape
Or is that just me being crazy again

Chronic depression they call it
Medications help calm it
But how about an ear to talk to

Someone who won't judge
Just a simple conversation with anyone, a stranger
Because I could really use the time to unwind and whine
Because I feel lonely and alone
And you can say it's the same, till you feel it
The need to be with someone you can hold
To take the sorrow and put it on hold

But its fine, I don't mind, you don't ever even have to reply

There's a feeling that I get when I'm flusterred
That feeling like my head's going to explode
The feeling of rage deep inside unbounded and asking why oh why
And I can't answer it
I can always smile and say everything will be alright
But
What if it's not
Who then can I believe if not myself?
I kind of just want to forget the world and all that I've been through
Forget my lies and all the words I've spoken half-truth half-nothing
And I want to close my eyes and be rid of this horrid experience because this is not what I'd like nor what I'd imagine
I long ago gave up on faith because there was no such magic
And here I am
Being told to rely on the uncertain
And I know the world isn't certain
But there has to be more order to this chaos than that which I've seen
And so what? Is it too much to dream?
Can't I just once be allowed to see a glimmering ray of hope rather than blindly attesting to a future I cannot hold?
I'd take you in my arms tonight and treat you with passion and care only because my soul isn't there and you'd cry on my shoulders because of the love that is lost when the heart is in despair
And I'd sit there like a rock unmoving, unflinching hoping to fade away seemlesly into the background, into oblivion, into nothing