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ChrissySue Dec 2012
I bet you think you know me A smile on my face A laugh in the air
My world has not a care
But that’s not the truth
Im a deciver
I hide behind this lie
My face is a Mirror of what you all need to see
But Im lost inside
Hidden in the darkness of loss
No one sees me
If you knew how I feel deep down
You wouldn’t love me
Couldn’t
Shouldn’t…
I miss her in my world
I miss my best friend
I miss my other half…
Life can be so cruel making us strong people say
One day I plan to leave this place
And run away from thoughts and memories
They tell me im lucky, and I know I am.
But I am sad and lost
So I am leaving
I promise Ill come back one day
After Ive seen what I need to see
And this brokenness inside me finally starts healing
Mike sikes Aug 2014
Darkness dances around me. Finding every ***** in my armor. My vision blurred, I feel my brain swell inside my skull. Threatening to break free.
Crashing blows land one after another.
My mouth fills with my lifeblood.
So metallic in taste.
I cannot speak for fear of bringing more pain and shame upon my weakened frame. Hard to breathe I feel my ribs displaced. This shadow figure is Unrelenting... These primal urges inside of me are screaming "defend your self fool"
I ignore them...
Not the voices I want to hear.
I believe I deserve
every fowl blow I receive.
I deserve this...
Crushing... Smashing... Longing.
I've lost my friends. No one to protect me.
    
        Punching... Kicking... Longing.

Who is this beast. Tormenting me. Knocking me down to his level.

Tearing down my tower,

Draining my sea,

burning my forest.

                    I have no hope.
                I am broken.
           Trapped in my own hell.
      Is this lucifer The great deciver?



In that moment the beating stops...
              Pain is still fresh but,
the figure ceases his assault..
          Panting... Wheezing... Longing...
Within shadow I see a broken grin...
    Darkness fades
and a familiar face greets me.
Eyes locked to what's left of my soul.
               It
               is
              me.
        - It always was.
This demon is and always will be
a part of me.
       Whether or
not the voices return.
I have to start from the
                                        b
                                      o
                                        t
                                       t
                                           o
                                             m
                                           again.
But I think that's okay.
          I think I have always been there.
                  - Even when I am not.

— The End —