I've been acquainted with the following
psychoactives compounds:

Depressants & Dissociatives;
Ethanol / EtOH / alcohol, drink, *****
γ-Hydroxybutyric acid / GHB / G, fantasy
β-Phenyl-γ-aminobutyric acid / PhGABA / Phenibut
Dextromethorphan / DXM / Benylin, Robitussin
Morphine / Papaver somniferum / *****
3-Methylmorphine / Codeine
Dihydrocodeine / DHC
Buprenorphine / Subutex, Suboxone
N-Allylnoroxymorphone / Naloxone / Suboxone, Narcan
Tramadol / Ultram
O-Desmethyltramadol/ O-DSMT / Omnitram
Thiopental / Sodium Pentothal
Diazepam / ******
2'-Chlorodiazepam / Ro5-3448 / Diclazepam
4'-Chlorodiazepam / Ro5-4864
Chlordiazepoxide / Librium
Gidazepam, hidazepam
Desalkylgidazepam / Bromonordiazepam
N-Desalkylfluarazepam / Norfluarazepam
Flubromazepam
Alprazolam / Xanax
Bromazolam / XLI-268
Clonazolam, Clonitrazolam / Clam
Etizolam / Etilaam, Etizest
Flualprazolam
Flubromazolam
Zopiclone / Zimovane
Pagoclone
Promethazine / Phenergan
Diphenhydramine / DPH / Benadryl, Nytol
Chlorphenamine, chlorpheniramine / CPM / Piriton
Cetirizine / Zyrtec
Amitriptyline / Elavil
Tianeptine / Coaxil, Stablon
Mirtazapine / Remeron
Quetiapine / Seroquel
Nitrous Oxide / N2O / laughing gas
Amyl Nitrite / Poppers
Ketamine [racemic] / K, Kitty
Esketamine [S-isomer] / Special K
Deschloroketamine / 2'-Oxo-PCM / DCK
N-ethyldeschloroketamine / 2'-Oxo-PCE / O-PCE / Eticyclidone
Deoxymethoxetamine / 3-Me-2′-Oxo-PCE / DMXE
Methoxetamine / 3-MeO-2'-Oxo-PCE / MXE / Mexxy
Hydroxetamine / 3-**-2'-Oxo-PCE / HXE / Hexxy
Methoxpropamine / 2-Oxo-3'-MeO-PCPr / MXPr
Methoxisopropamine / 2-Oxo-3'-MeO-PCiPr / MXiPr
3-Hydroxyphencyclidine / 3-**-***
3-Methoxyphencyclidine / 3-MeO-***
3-Methoxyeticyclidine / 3-MeO-PCE
3-Methyleticyclidine / 3-Me-PCE

Stimulants & Enhancers;
1,3,7-Trimethylxanthine / Caffeine / Coffea, Camellia sinensis / Coffee, Tea
3,7-dimethylxanthine / Theobromine / [constituent of] Chocolate
N-Ethyl-L-glutamine / L-Theanine / [constituent of] Green Tea
Nicotine / Nicotiana / Tobacco, cigarettes, smokes
Ephedrine / Ephedra
Pseudoephedrine / Ephedra, Sudafed
Adrenaline, Epinephrine
Choline bitartrate
L-alpha glycerylphosphorylcholine / Alpha-GPC, Choline alfoscerate
Cytidine 5'-diphosphocholine / CDP-choline, Citicoline
N-Acetylcysteine / NAC
2-Dimethylaminoethyl (4-chlorophenoxy)acetate / Meclofenoxate
N-Phenylacetyl-L-prolylglycine ethyl ester / Omberacetam / Noopept
Coluracetam / BCI-540
4-Phenylpiracetam
Propranolol
(±)-2-Benzhydrylsulfinyleth­anehydroxamic acid / Adrafinil
(±)-2-[(Diphenylmethyl)sulfinyl]acetamide / Modafinil
(–)-2-[(R)-(diphenylmethyl)sulfinyl]acetamide / Armodafinil
α-Methylphenethylamine / Amphetamine, αMP / Speed
N-Methylamphetamine / Methamphetamine / ****
Lisdexamfetamine / Vyvanse, Tyvense, Elvanse
2-Fluoromethamphetamine / 2-FMA
3-Fluoroamphetamine / 3-FA /  PAL-353
4-Fluoroamphetamine / 4-FA, 4-FMP /  PAL-303 / Flux
4-Methoxyamphetamine / PMA, 4-MA / Death
5-Methoxy-2-aminoindane / MEAI, 5-MeO-AI / Chaperone, Pace
Methythiolpropamine / MPA / Blow
3-Fluorophenmetrazine / 3-FPM / PAL-593
Methylphenidate / MPH / Ritalin, Concerta
4-Fluoromethylphenidate / 4F-MPH
4-Fluoroethylphenidate / 4F-EPH
3-Methylmethcathinone / 3-MMC / Metaphedrone
3-Methylethcathinone / 3-MEC
4-Methylmethcathinone / 4-MMC / Mephedrone
4-Methylethcathinone / 4-MEC
3-Chloro-N-tert-butyl-cathinone / Bupropion / Wellbutrin, Zyban
4-Chloromethcathinone / 4-CMC / Clephedrone
4-Fluoromethcathinone / 4-FMC / Flephedrone
4-Fluoro-α-methylaminovalerophenone / 4-Fluoropentedrone / 4-FPD
α-Ethylaminocaprophenone / N-Ethylhexedrone / NEH / Hexen
alpha-Pyrrolidinohexiophenone / α-PHP / PV-7
alpha-Pyrrolidinoisohexaphenone / α-PiHP, α-PHiP
3,4-Methylenedioxy-α-pyrrolidinohexiophenone / MDPHP
3,4-Methyl​enedioxy​pentedrone / βk-MBDP / Pentylone
3,4-Methylenedioxymethcathinone / βk-MDMA / MDMC / Methylone
3,4-Methylenedioxymethamphetamine / MDMA / ecstasy
5-(2-methylaminopropyl)benzofuran / 5-MAPB
6-(2-Aminopropyl)benzofuran / 6-APB / Benzofury
6-(2-Aminopropyl)-2,3-dihydrobenzofuran / 6-APDB / 4-desoxy-MDA
Mesembrine / Sceletium tortuosum, Kanna
Harmine / Peganum harmala / Syrian Rue
3,4,8-Trimethoxyphenanthrene-2,5-diol / Dendrobium nobile
NSI-189
4-chloro-N-(2-morpholin-4-ylethyl)benzamide / Moclobemide
Escitalopram / Cipralex, Lexapro
Fluoxetine / Prozac
Sertraline / Zoloft
Venlafaxine / Effexor
5-Hydroxytryptophan / 5-HTP / Oxitryptan

Hallucinogens & Psychedelics;
Cannabidiol / CBD / Cannabis
Cannabigerol / CBG / Cannabis
Δ9-Tetrahydrocannabinol / THC / Cannabis, Marijuana
Hexahydrocannabinol / HHC
AM-2201 / Synth-'noids, Spice
NM-2201 / CBL-2201
5C-AB-PINICA
Salvinorin A  / Salvia Divinorum / Diviner's Sage
d-Lysergic acid amide / d-Lysergamide / LSA / Ergine
Lysergic acid diethylamide / Lysergide / LSD, LAD / Acid, Lucy
Lysergic acid 2,4-dimethylazetidide / LSZ / Diazedine, Lambda, λ
1-Acetyl-lysergic acid diethylamide / 1A-LSD / ALD-52
1-Propionyl-lysergic acid diethylamide / 1P-LSD
1-Cyclopropionyl-N-Methyl-N-isopropyllysergamide / 1cP-MiPLA
6-Allyl-6-nor-lysergic acid diethylamide / AL-LAD / Aladdin
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-methylamphetamine / DOM / Dominic
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-bromoamphetamine / DOB / Aphrodite
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-chloroamphetamine / DOC / Doctor
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-methylthioamphetamine / DOT / Aleph
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-methyl-α-ethylphenethylamine / 4C-D / Ariadne
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-methylphenethylamine / 2C-D, 2C-M / Matrix
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-ethylphenethylamine / 2C-E / Eternity
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-bromophenethylamine / 2C-B / Nexus
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-chlorophenethylamine / 2C-C / Callisto
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-iodophenethylamine / 2C-I / Infinity
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-methylthiophenethylamine / 2C-T / Tesseract
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-ethylthiophenethylamine / 2C-T-2 / Rosy
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-fluoroethylthiophenethylamine / 2C-T-21 / Aurora
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-bromo-β-keto-phenethylamine / βk-2C-B
2,5-Dimethoxy-4-bromo-β-hydroxy-phenethylamine / βOH-2C-B / BOHB
2,3,6,7-Benzo-dihydro-difuran-8-bromo-ethylamine / 2C-B-FLY
2,5-Dimethoxy-N-(2-methoxybenzyl)-4-bromophenethylamine / 25B
2,5-Dimethoxy-N-(2-methoxybenzyl)-4-chlorophenethylamine / 25C
2,5-Dimethoxy-N-(2-methoxybenzyl)-4-iodophenethylamine / 25I
2,5-Dimethoxy-N-(2-hydroxybenzyl)-4-ethylphenethylamine / 25E-NBOH
3,4-Methylenedioxyamphetamine / MDA / Sass, Sally
3,4,5-Trimethoxyphenethylamine / Mescaline / M
3,5-Dimethoxy-4-ethoxyphenethylamine / Escaline
3,5-Dimethoxy-4-methallyloxyphenethylamine / Methallylescaline / MAL
α-Methyltryptamine / αMT / Indopan
N,N-dimethyltryptamine / DMT / The Spirit
N,N-dipropyltryptamine / DPT / The Light
N,N-Diisopropyltryptamine / DiPT / The Sound
N-Methyl-N-ethyltryptamine / MET / The Colour
N-Methyl-N-propyltryptamine / MPT
N-Ethyl-N-propyltryptamine / EPT
N-Methyl-N-isopropyltryptamine / MiPT / The Touch
4-Hydroxy-dimethyltryptamine / 4-**-DMT / Psilocybe / Psilocin
4-Phosphoryloxy-N,N-dimethyltryptamine / 4-PO-DMT / Psilocybin
4-Acetoxy-dimethyltryptamine / 4-AcO-DMT / Psilacetin
4-Hydroxy-N-methyl-N-ethyltryptamine / 4-**-MET / Metocin
4-Acetoxy-N-methyl-N-ethyltryptamine / 4-AcO-MET / Metacetin
4-Acetyloxy-N,N-dipropyltryptamine / 4-AcO-DPT / Pracetin
4-Acetoxy-N-methyl-N-cyclopropyltryptmine / 4-AcO-McPT
4-Acetoxy-N-methyl-N-isopropyltryptamine / 4-AcO-MiPT / Mipracetin
4-Hydroxy-N-methyl-N-isopropyltryptamine / 4-**-MiPT / Miprocin
5-Methoxy-N,N-dimethyltryptamine / 5-MeO-DMT / The God, The Power
5-Methoxy-N-methethyltryptamine / 5-MeO-MET / The Vision
5-Methoxy-N,N-diallyltryptamine / 5-MeO-DALT / Foxtrot
5-Methoxy-N-diisopropyltryptamine / 5-MeO-DiPT / Foxy
5-Methoxy-N-methyl-N-isopropyltryptamine / 5-MeO-MiPT / Moxy

[Hint - it's fun to read this one out loud :) ]*

Upon a crusty and spinning crag
Herbert's trusty craft did set,
Out beyond the path of Mars
In an asteroid belt they met.

Picked from out of thousands there
He selected a rocky home,
The perfect kind of rocky mass
To end his spacely roam.

First Ceres was too large and bold
And Pallas was too pale,
Old Vesta flew with sluggish wings
And Hygiea seemed too frail..

Ah, Sylvia seemed a likely rock
And her orbit seemed fine too,
But t'was Juno caught his eye at last
So what else could he do?

He sat his craft upon that rock
And loosed his robot throng,
Soon they mined and smelted ore
And built a structure strong.

That dome rose up with welded struts
To stand on a bright-lit plain,
The jewel-like panes filled out the place
O'er that kingdom he would reign.

Industrious 'bots and a stately home
So there did Herbert rule,
O'er a stark and rocky, lonely view
In the asteroid belt so cruel.

T'was far away to the nearest soul
No one to share Herb's tea,
To simply chat or share a bite
How lovely would that be?

Deep beneath old Juno's crust
'Bots mined for all their worth
Pulling out rare stuff and gems
And sending them to Earth.

But all the gold and diamond stones
Could hardly even start,
To fill the void that Herbert felt
Where he knew he kept a heart.

Yet, several rocky asteroids out
Across that rocky belt,
Another set upon her task
With ores and **** to melt.

Past Callisto and Iris zones
Where Cybele and Psyche spin
Fair Susanna tended Hektor's mines
Of silver, zinc and tin.

Now orbits often twist and dance
And trade with one another,
Where one boulder once was kin
There soon will be some other.

T'was thus that Herbert's Juno rock
Slowly made it's way,
To catch-up Susie's Hektor world
And shadow it one day.

Sue looked out her glass abode
To see what blocked the sun,
Then seeing Juno with its mines
A visit seemed like fun.

Toward a spot near Herbert's ship
Suzanna's came a-falling,
Imagine Herbert's bright surprise
Seeing visitors a-calling.

A shapely suit with bubble head
And jet-pack soon came floating,
To Herbert's door that afternoon
The sight had him emoting.

"Well hello there friend, and who are you
That to my rock comes knocking?"
"Just another miner fool
Whose sun your Juno's blocking"

"In just a little while, I'm sure
Our asteroids will part,
So why not stay a little while
And a friendship we can start?"

Double shipments soon they made
To send away to Earth
While their robots toiled each day
The sweethearts shared their mirth.

Great love did our Herb and Susie share
Built on those pleasant talks
And soon a tractor beam they fixed
Between their drifting rocks.

And still today in spacers' lore
They talk about that tether,
That linked two hearts among the rocks
Two asteroids bound together.

Your presence passes me
like a slow-moving satellite
revolving around
my head, slurred
into mesh—so gravitated.

Love is a shade which
covers me close
to your body, in sync
like the movements of the planets,
pivoting harmonious in the
deep, dark mystery
of your sheltered embrace,
and the universe seems
to settle around me
calm and constellated.
  
Your eyes, a deep depiction
in the mind, so starry, I
see nothing more
but stars.

Bright as the brilliance
of the fire of my affection
at the core of my soul, lit
with passion, intense
as a thousand suns, a
million moonlit galaxies,
is my love which seems
to have no end.

Your presence passes me,
a slow-moving satellite
revolving around
like a moon to Jupiter,
boy, I feel that pull.

A fox sits in the forest at the foot of my house.
Each morning
she intertwines with the sunrise, materialising through graceful leaps
It leaves me breathless;
all I can do is bathe in awe.

One morning I extend my hand
and she engulfs me, gracefully
I become whole again. We dash through trees
and fields and meadows

She dances, and leads me gently to the tips of the earth
Her breath resounds against hillsides, and as I fall
I catch almost a glimmer of
light-dipped roses, and golden daffodils.

I am Jupiter storms
Unabounded by time
Raging on
And eons
Can not hope to confine me
To unstable matter
And mass
Rearranging
My molecules morphing
To liquefied jewels
And my surface
A canvas
Of unrefined fuels
Like an abstract mosaic
Of swirling
Unfurling
Tempests of archaic
As constellations
And the ages I've waited
And slumbered and spun
Into memories
Faded
And taken the names of your gods
As my payment
Inflating my ego's
Mesmeric rotations

So quick to claim hearts
Of Europa's amidst
My seductive, enchanting
Illusory bliss
Venture into my centrifuge
Fumy abyss
I have pressed up my lips
Of a frigid, wet steel
And then sealed
With a kiss
What ‘nary
A planetary
Can resist

And as she revolves
Around me
And gives life
Io dances about me,
Callisto my wife
Ganymede my seed
And the rest of my progeny breed
Future needs
What the Earthlings will need
To make up for their greed
All will see
Look to me
In my enormity
As my reservoirs
Fill them
With infinity

“Baa”, Bylon fell into a soft woolen sigh
Hoping a bright star would cross the great sky
For these now were the long nights of the year
And to miss her nightly wish was her humble fear
To be safe and keep healthy, and also from harm
Was a wish she’d kept constant for those on the farm
But tonight the stars set still in their twinkling
And for hope of a change, Bylon had just an inkling
Zion, the lion had sprung from the sun
Come out of the union with the infinite One
Born of fire, his desire was to teach what he’d learned
From inside the live spirit, whereas he had burned
For more knowledge, more wisdom and that in between
From experiences he foresaw and those he had seen
His fiery launch propelled him to the planet of life
Where he wished to release at least one lamb from strife
Her eyes, they met the fire from afar
Happy at last to see her shooting star
She knew she had waited for this night to come
And as it drew nearer, she became numb
It was brighter than any she’d seen before
A brilliant blue-violet emerged from its core
Larger in size it grew as it approached
A ball of flames and sparks burst when our sky it touched
With this fiery display, Bylon’s mouth was agape
Gasping in awe with the flames taking shape
They formed a large head atop a four-legged frame
As she noticed its tail, she heard “Zion’s my name
I will not harm you, please trust me”, he demanded
“As you can see, I’ve not burned where I’ve landed
Your fleece won’t catch fire, for the flames are illusion
Made of pure light to aid my propulsion”
Bylon’s fear soon faded from Zion’s assurance
Yet still was amazed by the recent occurrence
She managed to mumble some sort of a greeting
She admitted “I’m humbled by this fantastic meeting
Your majestic appearance has built my suspense
I imagine your purpose here is just as intense”
Zion now brightened with his chance to speak
“My Father was right, you’re incredibly meek
Of course all that he says is always the truth
And I’m happy he sent me in the prime of your youth
For the task he set forth for me to present
Is much more marvelous than my display of descent
You have been chosen to journey the planets within
This system of orbs where they do more than spin”
“Their attitudes differ as like the animals here
And the attributes they share most subtly appear
In fact as we pass the atmosphere here and now…”
“We’re already in outer space!” She exclaimed “Wow!”
“We’ve decided on lady’s first, my Father and I
So off to the planet Venus you and I will fly”
As they glided through space guided by a blue-greenish glow,
Bylon’s expression inside began to surface and grow
She smiled with glee, her eyes wide with surprise
Zion glowed even greater when he caught a glimpse of her eyes
A look of sadness and welled up tears of bliss
And sooner than she’d thought, they’d come to Venus
Bylon began to sense a magnificent pleasance
As they crossed over into the planet’s comfortable essence
A complete warming comfort caused her to tingle inside
While fearlessly floating in a free-falling glide
The two of them softly landed on billowing gas
A substance that sustained as planetary mass
It swirled around and soon started to whisper
She spoke “I am Venus, please feel at home here”
And Bylon did, as Zion knew she would
For the surrounding energy was only good
The voice of Venus was like the song of a bird
The most beautiful sound Bylon had ever heard
She assured them they were welcome as long as they were there
And soon she bid farewell to the pair
They departed and felt at ease with the journey
They were traveling now to Mercury for learning
For he was the most educated of the bunch
And they’d arrived there with precise timing for lunch
Mercury was prepared and shared with them food
For to do any different would have made him feel rude
The food was served warm as was his generous banter
When he played music and sang, he was the enchanter
His charm was abundant, and his knowledge was great
They had learned much in the time to clear a plate
Feeling mentally full and digestively fit
Restlessness set in, causing inability to sit
Bylon expressed how gracious this time had been
Zion agreed, sharing Bylon’s ear-to-ear grin
Mercury gave his regards and bid them a safe and swift trip
“Hope you catch Mars in a good mood” was his departing tip
Zion assured Bylon there was no cause for worry
And with a flash, off to Mars, all around becoming blurry
When they came closer to the red planet of war
There could be heard a loud noise, as if the sky had just tore
A rippling resonance was felt as they still flew through space
There was a fierce storm brewing at a marvelous pace
Dense and coarse clouds of sand swirled around on the ground
Flying rock and ferocious flurries created a deafening sound
It was frightening, Bylon voiced, to see such a display
Zion assured her, “This turmoil is his only way
To express his frustrations and fears open and free
And release the pressure that he harbors beneath
For Mars is the protector of the bodies in this system
As a passionate warrior, he‘s proud to assist them
There’s a spot we can land in the eye of the storm
As we touch down there you may feel quite warm”
With a turbulent landing, Bylon felt less at ease
The storm’s cyclonic friction added several degrees
Enough to make the usually cold planet quite hot
For this size of a storm, though, this seemed a safe spot
“To what do I owe the pleasure?” bellowed the red planet
Mars strives for the best measure, just as he planned it
“We come with peaceful intent”, Zion now pleaded
“I’m curious to know your discontent” Bylon bleated
“Are you actually worried about being attacked?”
“This is more than protection, as a matter of fact.”
“This is how I display my deepest passions”
“Through my physical aggressive actions”
“If challenged, I keep intact my defenses”
“This seems to hone my other present senses”
“Interesting,” spoke Bylon “you are quite frank.”
“For your honesty and candor I do thank”
Zion added “It’s nice that we can feel safe here”
“In the midst of this, and yet free from fear”
“Regardless, we should probably be on our way”
“It has been nice here after all” Bylon began to say
Mars bade them farewell, and let up on the storms
His personality seemed to surface in so many forms
Bylon, feeling anxious about meeting another
“Let’s visit Jupiter, the next planetary brother”
“His large size is quite impressive to me” said she
“Plus I’ve heard good things of his philosophy”
Zion added “it is true, he has quite a broad-mind”
“His nature towards others I find to be kind”
The moons of Jupiter alone were amazing
Bylon thought, as she found herself gazing
Io, Callisto, Ganymede, and Europa were just four
Further observance spotted evidence of even more
Upon arrival Jupiter provided a most jovial welcome
“I’m happy to see you made it this far” he tells them
Zion filled him in of how well it had been going
“Although I’m sure you will end up knowing,”
“Due to your extensive knowledge of this system”
“Without such data it would be hard to assist them”
“This is true” acknowledged Jupiter, “of their history, how”
“It relates to all that is to come and what is here now”
“For the cycles that encompass our existence in space”
“Help us observe the rhythm behind their embrace”
“We’ve seen comets return, and their hint of a path”
“With which we calculate through the precision of math”
“And in turn this must give you a broader perspective”
Bylon spoke thoughtfully “It must keep you most active”
“Keeping tabs on this wildly diverse planetary tribe”
“And in this you must take quite a bit of pride”
“I try to be a modest giant in their midst” Jupiter said
“Not wanting any of them to think I have a big head”
Zion thought the large planet to be very admirable
To speak of his great role and still remain humble
Thanking generous Jupiter for his cheery disposition
The gracious lion reminded Bylon of their mission
As Bylon gratefully extended a reluctant goodbye
Zion launched them up and through Jupiter’s sky
In a twist, a turn and the faintest flicker of his tail
The two now eyed a course for Saturn and set sail
Bylon was suddenly amazed by the sight before her
Brilliantly colored rings that beckoned any explorer
Zion explained to her the protection she’d been granted
From the hot and cold planets on which they’d landed
He also noted that with Saturn it would differ slightly
As his coldness was from inside a place locked tightly
For Saturn was the most reserved of all planets known
But from his wisdom we all have greatly grown
He patiently ponders many mysteries from within
Giving the necessary thought through meditation
“I have been expecting you”, Saturn gravely claimed
“It’s nice of you to come on the day that was named”
“After an old Italian corn god who once had a week”
“Revered in his honor for which I no longer seek”
“So for all of God’s purposes I accept my position”
“Ancient insight bestowed through introspective vision”
“And yet, like most times, I want to be alone”
“So I’ll send you two on the way you are going”
From the rings surrounding they took their flight
To the planet known for the system’s darker side
This would be Uranus, who behaved a bit odd
Erratic was his usual behavior, more often than not
(unfinished ballad)

If we stop learning moon names at Callisto
and Ganymede, where are the other sixty-three
whoop, there goes gravity
If Themisto stubbed his toe, how could we
teach everyone else to cringe?
We are growing,
Elara, we are learning how to reach
higher with the hands we’ve got,
how to be tiny dots full of not-quite fire
in a world so much bigger than desire.
The best advice you gave me,
Elara, was when you silently tied back
your hair and rolled up your sleeves,
cleared your throat and decided
It’s not the fire after all, it’s the light.
And I might have burned out by now
if you hadn’t just rolled up your sleeves
like that, not flaming or fuming or
running or burning but steady,
ready for the rest of forever.
You are fire and water at once,
Elara. You take my hand and we walk
calmly upward, one step
for me and one for you makes two
for womankind.
Stepping over the black hole
of expectations and into the revelations
of well-lit night. You and me,
Elara, now we’re ready.

To the man who raised me where my own father couldn’t,

Papa… where do I even begin?
I love you more than words could ever express. I will always cherish our time together- even though I will forever hate that we could not have more- and all the lessons you taught me. You were the most sincere, hard working, admirable and loving person I will ever have the fortune of knowing.

You were my protector, my knight in shining armour, my superhero, my rock, my anchor, my confidante, my defender, and my best friend. There will never be a man in my life who could ever measure up to your strength, love and kindness.

I’m sorry I’m not ready to let you go… nor do I think I ever will be. I guess part of me just thought you would be here with me forever. I really wish that were the case… but if it’s time for you to go, I guess I can settle for you being my guardian angel instead.

I also just want to thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you for always being there for me without ever questioning it or wavering.
Thank you for holding my hand and guiding me.
Thank you for wiping my tears, hugging me tightly and always knowing how to comfort and cheer me up.
Thank you for protecting me.
Thank you for always having my back and supporting me.
Thank you for all the times you soothed my anxiety attacks growing up.
Thank you for all the nights you spent up with me when I was afraid.
Thank you for your undying love and support.
I can’t ever thank you enough for everything.

I miss you so much. I wish I could talk to you once more. I wish I could tell you how much I love and miss you. I wish I could thank you and apologize. I wish I could joke around with you.

I wish I could have you sing to me- in that god awful tone-deaf singing voice of yours that always made me laugh. I’d even put up with you singing Chicken Talk.

I wish we could have had more time, but I know that no amount of time would ever have been enough. I got you for almost 25 years and I guess that will have to be enough.

I would give anything just to be able to tell you this and for you to be able to hear me and respond. I know you’d tell me not to cry and not to be sad. I know you would tell  me you love me and always will. I know you’d also tell me to take care of Nonna and Callisto, Nova and the kids.
I just wish more than anything I could actually hear you saying those things.

You are my sunshine, papa…

Always, your little girl.

Last night,
I told Jupiter
to sell me one of her
many moons.
Well, you can't have
Callisto.
How about Europa?
No.
Then can Amalthea
become my own?
There was silence
in waiting
for
what
I'd expect.
it's been quite
a while
actually,
a good many months
until I remembered
that small dot of silver
hung up in my room.
just where it
belonged
I found myself too.
I spoke with Jupiter
for an hour tonight
She asked "How is Thea?"
I said,
"She's doing all right."
How good of her
to want to know.
My moon is my anchor
and I love her so.

Variegated Summer constellations along
the Eastern gaze , Sagittarius , draw your bow ,
shoot a star Earths way
Big Dipper , extinguish the thirst of Greek heroes ,
Ursa Major hath quelled the passion of Callisto ,
the tail of Haileys Comet filling the night
with wishes and tender innuendo

Arctos: The product of an affair*
Callisto, single mom to a Little Bear–
Cronusly confined to the night sky,
never kissing the ocean

Dusk is brief in valleys.

but daytime slowly washed, skin, scraped carefully
to eat, covered in
scents delivered by transparent bag
mingling with garden trees and the cattle flies from fields nearby.

Rare, imported light-bulb light
passes through hair,
hands sit dwarfed
and distort in wine glasses,
the split *** mumbles rises on the hob
for Callisto outside, dancing prosaically about a very thin pole.

Conversations become excuses to stare at lips,
and songs suggested without conviction
play unfinished.


The music is softer now, the group diminished.
Getting heavier things.
Extremities in particular, and a few more sophisticated objects.
Corkscrews like ingots and eyelashes masscarad in lead.

There are the last lights and the thin summer sheets
that get in the way; stuck to sweaty –‘tertwined and clumsy--

Ash and tannin obscure the smell of gums
(and sometimes even the folded sent of neck and jaw).
More sweat is generated
Sleep does not come
or so it feels
when
morning is slightly too soon
bright and curtainless
and the beauty is sifted fruity and fuckless soft but moaning.

like Jericho of the ancients
my walls have found their matchmate, their shofar,
their holy crumbling disintegration -
have sounded the depth
of my abyssal and penetrable, vaginal soul

I am entered through the desolated and tender crevasse
discovered in the arched vault of my love
which treasures not, nor needs
yet knows ee cummings’ “secret of begin” to the outer
borders of my being, the hidden places of my knowing

the right kind of madness, this
of a rightness and a madness so pure, it stings
the perceptions of ordinariness and
makes of ennui - the sinter of a heated being -
anything but

yet, enter my fornix with dread and awe
lest you vitrify it by atomic waves of sorrow
I am fragile, and tender, gentle, strong and destructive
I am death from Life
and
Life from Death

blow your shofar, Ram, and I shall fall into your gravity
I shall be as Callisto to Jupiter,
an orbit by seduction and a
child wombed in Love


c. 2017 Roberta Compton Rainwater

It's hard to let go and hold on

Let go for a little while...

Dangling from a star
In ebony space

Invisible,
Dangling
Hanging on to how it feels
Drowned in incandescence

Lost in the void
Lost in the void

Touched your fingertip
Before floating away

Oh no
Where did you go
Oh no
Found yourself,
The tip of where
You can't see
Or ever go

Lost in the void
Lost in the void

Always dangling there
Waiting for a glimpse
Of something far off,
Galactic

Still hanging on,
Dangling,
Crystalline trellis
Covered head to toe
With heavenly glow
Danced in Jupiter's rain  
Under Callisto's light
And nothing could compare
Shining with a million colors
The whole time
Dangling

Lost in the void
Lost in the void

Mighty Jupiter, massive, majestic…
Three hundred times the size of planet Earth.
Shaper, molder of many of our planets.
First planet formed at our solar system’s birth.

Your gravitational pull is completely unmatched
By any other planet that revolves around the sun.
Despite over four billion years since your making,
Your strong influence and your work are yet undone.

How do you manage your many, many moons--
Seventy-nine plus on paths around your sphere?
Callisto, Io, Ganymede, Europa…
Do you have a name for our moon down here?

Where would we be if it hadn't been for you?
Would there have been the birth of humankind?
As you rampaged through our solar system,
Is this configuration what you had in mind?

Protecting us from objects farther out in space,
You could also send us a dangerous surprise:
By hurling an asteroid in the earth’s direction,
You have the potential to cause our demise.

You are certainly a mystery of science--
Baffling, inscrutable. Your power, raw.
We here on Earth respect your magnanimity.
We fear you somewhat, yet we look at you with awe.

-by Bob B (1-25-20)