Insanity

Being mad is not so bad
if you don't know you are.

It's going there, that brings despair
and knowing that you are.

Briz 23/1013

Insanity

Being mad is not so bad
if you don't know you are.

It's going there, that brings despair
and knowing that you are.

Briz 23/1013

I caught myself holding my breath.
Approaching the powerful intersection.
Enough power to take lives.
Lucky enough to have held onto mine.
The scene replays itself automatically in my memory.
Silver van pulls out infront of me and boom!
Swerve, ditch, smoke.
Gah, adrenaline pumping!
My car took its own life to save mine.
And boy do I miss her...
I blink and I'm on the other side.
I let my breath go and get hit in the face with another ******* memory.
It's funny how memories work.
They can be so deep down and forgotten.
And something like an innocent drive to free you mind can dredge up all the crap that's been buried. 
Every time I pass the house where I was first introduced to ****.
I think of Lyndsae.
Her stupid yellow mailbox.
I have the hidden urge to beat that **** down with a baseball bat.
I look for that ugly car she drives.
Knowing it won't be there in the drive way.
I still catch myself looking.
When I see that car out on the road,
That burnt orange little **** with tires,
I glance at the driver.
Never her.
But still...
No matter how far down the memories are,
It still comes back to me.
I wish I could twist a cork ***** into my ear and yank my brain out.
Take it apart and put it back together again like a puzzle.
Only, leaving out all the pieces I don't want to remember.
I don't wanna think about Carlee every time I pass Eatn Park.
I don't wanna think about Drew when I pass the road I used to turn on to get to her old house. 
I don't wanna think about Coonz ******* that guy when I drive to New Eagle.
And when there's no land marks to refresh my mind ****** memory,
The music does a fine job of working tears out of my eyes.
Taylor Swift and her "I'm dying to know if it's killing you like its killing me" 
Or blink 182 saying "I'm just a ******* child, don't let it go to your head."
And as soon as Celebrity Status starts playing, BriZ is there sitting beside me. We're off to pittsburgh's light up night.
With the next song, she vanishes "and sometime I say things that I wish that I could take back. The most crucial thing I lack is a thing called tact. And if you're always so intently listening. Then that smartest thing to say is to tell myself not to say a thing"
Oh!!! And the real heart wrenching song of all that makes me ball like a little ******* baby "oh dear. It's been hardly a moment and you are already missed. There is still a bit of your skin that I've yet to have kissed..... We'll be holding hands once again. All our broken plans will mend. I will hold you tight so you kno."
And oh I want you to kno so bad.
My memories won't go away. 
They are apart of me.
Believe me, I wish I could sort them out and throw all the bad ones away.
But I can't.
So you can say I'm not over something when I am.
Cause when the subject is brought up, it's impossible not to think about it.
Just because it's a memory that makes me mad, sad, upset, angry, or violent, doesn't mean that I'm not over it. 
I'm over all the stuff in the past besides the absolute last thing that happened to me. 
She felt like my one and only.
I called her the love of my life.
Better than all the rest by far!
So much trust and happiness.
But love don't last forever. 
I think about her all the time.
In bed.
In the shower.
When I swim.
When I hear music.
When I'm just ******* sitting here watching tv.
I fantasize way too hard.
And it only hurts.
It hurts to remember. 
I tell myself that I will do anything to get that back. 
But with what was said, she's turned off and out.
Faults mine, hands down. 
Round of applause for the old jack *** the refound the surface. 
I knew I couldn't be good enough for her.
Why do I set myself up for failure?! 
Maybe I should stop trying so hard. 
Psh.
I beat myself up worse than anyone else could.
I'm my own bully.
I'm the only enemy I have.
All the others are just decoys.
Mishandling situations
That's all on me.
And I can't do anything to change it now.
Regret? Yea.
Some.
A lot.
But it's over.
All over....

Big Mama Africa

Poor Mama Africa,
Madiba has gone.
Remember his dream
& move forward, as one.

Don't let his dream
be put down & forgotten;
by the schemes of the greedy,
the rogues & the rotten.

Dear, big Mama Africa,
your beautiful indeed
and rich enough to give your children,
all that they need.

So why is there such poverty,
starvation and despair?
There's wealth enough to go around,
if everyone would share.

But those who can, horde riches,
far more than they  need.
Denying their own people,
with  selfishness & greed.

You must get together
and speak, with one voice.
Across the land, shout your demand;
unite and then rejoice.

Briz 9/12/13

Blue-diamond blues

I wish they'd develop a ******-lite,
when you just want a cuddle,
In the middle of the night.

A tablet to stimulate
some warmth & affection
and not an assault
from a forced *******!

You could save the blue-diamond
for the odd weekend;
when the kids are away
or you've more time to spend.

And then, in between,
have ******-lite;
when you just want a cuddle,
in the middle of the night.

Briz 25/11/13  :)

A queer world

My local pub won't do posh grub,
but sells beer from the wood.
You can't get wine nor cocktails
but the ales are all real good.

There's always sport, on the tv,
the wooden floors are bare;
so when two 'pretty boys' minced in,
they caused us all to stare.

Both had high-lights in their hair
and make-up, on their faces.
They ordered half a lager each
& two straight ***** chasers.

A quick look round however
and they soon made up their mind:
our rough&read;; local
didn't cater for their kind.

But, as they quickly minced away
and off, through the pub door;
up spoke the bar-room know-all,
like many times before.

“An article I read, last week,
said ten percent are gay.
Not all of 'em dress-up like that
nor try to walk that way.”

Someone said,”Shut up, you fool.”
while we just kept on drinkin'
but what he'd said, stuck in  our head
and we began a-thinkin'

My mate says, “Watch the barman, Bob,
he wears a lot of pink
& holds his little-finger out,
each time he has a drink.”



They reckon Bill, who works away
and only comes in Sundays.
Goes in the cubicle to ****,
when wearing his wife's ******.

I know it's not conclusive
but I thought it pretty queer,
when Tommy took his wife out twice,
to see that Mama Mia.

Then there's Big Jack Smedley,
though he's muscular and manly;
he has his body waxed, each month,
by that hairdresser – Stanley.

The more we talked about it,
as we downed our beer & stout;
the more we realised,
that not everyone's come out.

We now accept that being camp,
is not the only way
and reckon that there's happen more
than fifty shades of gay!


Briz 14/6/13

Driving through the parking lot
No cars to be found
I believe it could be Sunday
So I'll just walk around

Off to get coffee
But I think the malls closing
I order a drink
But the guy is opposing

Walk to a bench
And there I sat
Here comes Briz and Billi
But who the hell is that?

We sat on that bench
For some odd reason
We got the great idea
To commit some treason

We took that bench
Straight to the door
But the cops were there
And made us put it back on the floor

I sat on the ground
When a little kid came over
She was the cutest thing
But her mom wasn't sober

Mid thirties is what I assume
She hunted for what was missing
She sat too close behind me
And then we started kissing

She shoved me over
My back to the floor
On top she climbed
And out loud I swore

I put up a fight
Because I hadn't a clue
Why she picked me
To be the one to *****

I woke up gasping
And there for I panic
These dreams I have
Are too ******* manic

Why do I dream
Of such different matters
Waiting for my heart
To crash and shatter

I want to dream
About kittens and rainbows
But luckily for me
That's just not how it goes

Colored people!

On a recent trip, to Swaziland,
a local man said, “I don't understand.

You go green with envy, blue with cold;
cowards are yella, or so I'm told.

You're also blue, when feeling sad;
you blush, bright red, it drives me mad,

when you say I'm colored, just look, I say;
I'm monochrome, all night and day!”

Briz 4/6/13

Crowning Glory

“ Oh Liz, old dear, you do look queer,
what causes such a frown?”
“The  kids Phil, they're all bickering.
They want to share The Crown.”

“Charles rang me, this morning.
He was ages on the 'phone.
He said we should retire,
so that he can take the throne.

Then Andrew rang & so did Anne,
complaining, it's not fair.
They reckon, in this day & age
that all of them should share.

Even Edward had a moan.
I'm sick of all their quibbling.
He feels that he's been frozen out,
as he's the youngest sibling.

So cancel all appointments,
tell them to go away.
Say Her majesty has had
a really bad heir day.

Briz :) 5/2/14

Advice.
(for a lad, as he sets out, on his journey through life)



Never kiss a *******, just pay the lass and thank ‘er.
Never try to work your passage, on a foreign tanker.

The lass could give you something that might not go away.
Your ship-mates may be gamblers, who’d rob you, as you play.

But more importantly, by far, wherever you drop anchor.
Never trust a politician, clergyman nor banker!

Briz 3/3/14
-----------------

An old man's farewell

Take my life, I'm knackered God,
unless you can restore it.
My kids think I'm a selfish sod
but they'll all soon get o'er it.

When they've sold up all my stuff,
they'll feel a lot less vexed;
so tell the world I've had enough.
I'm ready for the next.

I've tried my best, to edge my bets,
done what 'The Good Book' states.
I'm hoping there'll be no regrets,
when at The Pearly Gates.

I've had my share of good & bad;
I've had both tears & laughter.
So, see you later, don't be sad;
one day, in the here-after.

Briz 20/1/14