"blury" poems
Blury you,
in the fog of nowhere.
I keep trying to focus,
but you seem to fade away.
I try to yell but I can't,
I try to run but I can't.
Yet, you seem to fade away,
in the fog of nowhere.
Nov 11, 2014
Nov 11, 2014 at 6:44 PM UTC
Stories and poems
Love and shared coffees
Bus rides and jokes
I saw the sun glimmering
The corners crept in
The room became smaller
Breathing got harder and voices became more
My body became a canvas of my own doing
The blood became more and the smile slipped away in the dark
I became lost in a world of Bipolar Depression
With a new mixture of pills of various variety of color
The line between reality and fantasy became blury
Until a line was no more
I found comfort in creating art over my arms hidden by clothes
My days became a mixture of pills and emotional outbursts
It was like falling asleep, slowly at first and then all together
I was destroyed
I was distorted
I was redefined by darkness of late night cries
I was no more
I became a silent void
I became nothing
I became defined by my illness
I became my worst fear
I am a beautiful void
I am
I am
I am lost and captured in a glass jar labeled December Bipolar
I am no more
Jun 20, 2016
Jun 20, 2016 at 7:03 AM UTC
I want to sleep.
I am very tired.
Things are blury.
I don't remember getting on the ground.
I can feel my heart beating loudly.
I blink for ten point five seconds at a time.
Where am I?
Jul 6, 2013
Jul 6, 2013 at 11:18 PM UTC
as i stand here
in this pool of blood
i look at my wrist
i see the cuts
i see the scars
so many times
ive drug this blade
across my wirst
wondered if this is it
this time is diffrent
is this it?
was this my life
a sea of misery
moutains of pain
rivers of hate
finaly its all over
im getting cold
im getting tired
as this pool grows
at my feet
i think finaly
i get to leave
i collaps
evrything gets blury
i slip in to my slumber
never to wake again
Nov 23, 2013
Nov 23, 2013 at 9:54 PM UTC
****** man
Lurking in the corners
Evil smile
Meanwhile
A child
Alive
But barely
Can't pick of the phone
Who'll answer
A cop,
Rookie
Would be
A vet in time
But the shots
That hit his spine
Hit his soul a lot harder
Almost as hard as
The hits
From a ****
That used his fist
And never open hand,
Demands not met,
No speech
From the whore's throat
Silent night
Was supoosed to be
Holy
But the holey stockings
Was a worn out reminder,
The timer hit 12:00
on the 25th
But
A bowl of cheerios
No honey
No milk
Was bold
As the truth
It told
Like
The gifts
Never bought
Or the mall
Never shopped
In the cold
Black ice on the road at night
My car never fought so hard
To follow lights
Flurries proved
To be as blury
As the vision
From sippin
Too much wine
Red stains,
And lipstick
Secrets untold,
Focus on the road
Home is but a couple miles
But another cup
Would suffice
I'm willin to suffer the consequences
What will I sacrafice?
What's the price
For a few drinks
After supper?
Besides,
The bartender wouldnt of offered
Enough scotch
To make my mind alter
He's a friend to me,
What?
You mean to tell me,
That the end of me,
Is in a
Glass of hennessy
Ha!
Hail mary full of grace,
Full of faults
But full of faith
And as she prayed
The lord did praise
Amazed
Life proved to be a maze
But in the haze
A few rays
Would should shine her way
There were 2 sets
Of footprints
But a woman fell
There's been
1 set ever since
Carried
New Born
Born Again
And twice married
Widows tears
On a pillow
Bible never far
Closed eyes
Could still reach
Even in sleep
Wrinkles deep
A hot flash
of her age blinks
on the alarm
1:40
And one 40 year old woman
Who thinks
That if she keeps
His name in glory
Her story
Would end in peace.
Oct 31, 2010
Oct 31, 2010 at 3:31 PM UTC
I feel the weight of my words
crumble more with every day
that passes by,
like Autumn leaves beneath
my feet.
And I wonder if they ever
meant anything,
or if they ever will again.
Someone once told me that
life is merely a series of moments,
like blury foreign films
watched in a ***** haze.
Our lives are but a silver platter
of stories that can hardly be proven,
only eaten by those who listen.
There will never be certainty
that "then" ever really happened,
that words were ever said,
or even felt.
We are insignificant figures
of organic matter
and restless molecules
that spit out words,
to form phrases,
to form moments,
that never truly occur.
And again,
I wonder if I ever meant anything,
or if I ever will again.
Oct 23, 2016
Oct 23, 2016 at 3:03 AM UTC
go on and walk away, there is noting more that i can say,
i never mattered to you anyway.
treat me like a stranger, treat me like a joke,
when my heart is in danger, and all my dreams
gone up in smoke.
make me feel like a fool for ever believing in you,
oh how you laugh and you poke.
i remember when i was your bestfriend,
although it was long ago, when you said
that i became someone that you didn't wish to know.
i remember all the screaming and the sorrow
that happened after, smoking on the train tracks,
the long phone calls and the laughter,
you were the whole book to me, but to you
i was just a chapter, i remember when you left
me, a broken disaster.
i remember when you told me that i would
see you soon, you crying in the car, when my heart
bursted like a baloon. i still remember all the talks we
had, the friendship, the madness and regret, but that
friendship was lost a long time ago.
i just hadn't grasped it yet.
i guess that i didn't realise that i was so
easy for you to just forget.
all this time i thought you cared,
because of all of the things that we shared,
i guess i should have known, and should have
gotten it through my head, when you let them taunt me
on the phone, and said you wouldn't care if i were dead.
when i was lost, looking for an anwser,
restless and unsure,
i had never felt more insecure.
maybe this person that i'm remembering
was never, who you really were.
Jul 17, 2015
Jul 17, 2015 at 3:23 PM UTC
*I think of you as breaths of air;
forgettable but necessary.
I think maybe you could manifest into solidity -
if only I stopped comparing you to wind;
blury and fleeting,
but oh so necessary.*
Dec 15, 2016
Dec 15, 2016 at 8:48 PM UTC
Time triangle
.
Time
The pyramidial form bewilders me
It's main focus set in my blury eyes
The triton of fate on which
The destiny of my feeble soul lies
Of what answers to my poor
Soul seems to seek
.
When will my soul disappear?
Like the smoke from an old man's pipe
Vanishing into the clouds like it never existed
When will I pass from this physical life?
To embark on the journey to the pillars of the the world
My soul trembles because he know not bout his departure!
.
How will my soul evanescence?
Like stars fading away to avoid the day
Leaving no traces on the skylines
My soul troubles because he know not about his departure!
.
Where will I die?
Bidding farewell to this world!
Like young bride saying goodbye to
His fathers house
My soul grief for he know not about
His exit!
Balogun David
Drunk
Dec 30, 2016
Dec 30, 2016 at 1:16 PM UTC
Today,
I don't know why
Nor the exact reason,
I'm sad.
The princels
brushes
On my easel are dry
So my eyes.
I scratch the surface.
It's now more bright,
But still blury
******
Muddy.
Sad.
Today is sad!
My!
I can't paint
Nor write!
My hands are invisible,
So am I
"Sad"
Sadness.
Anxiety.
Depression.
More sadness.
Today is sad.
Today I'm sad.
The green leaves on my window
Cannot tell me why.
They seem cheerful but not I....
Nor the Eco of the wind,
Playing on the water fountain
At the lake, can't explain
Nor the ducks or the birds
No one can tell me why
I'm sad
Not even my dog,
Who happily barks,
Not even my fat
sleepy cat.
Maybe you friend
reading this lines
Maybe you can see why
And tell me why I'm this sad.
Why my phone never rings.
Why I'm so lonely
Why I feel like I want to cry
When is so beautiful outside.
Why I'm so moody today.
Why my favorite song that now plays
***** so bad.
Am I getting mad?
Loosing my marbles?
Why no one seems to care
if my soft heart
is broken into zillion pieces,
Or if by the rain in my eyes
They are becoming blind.
And am I mad?
Someone, anyone, tell me please!
Why, of all days,
Today
I have to be this sad....
Jan 10, 2015
Jan 10, 2015 at 1:03 PM UTC
Another day in the blue
With people who are
Frenemies with the sun as
Hot as a burbinig stove plate
And the day as normal as the safari
Peope lack the energy to
Get thier inquiries so they send me as if i was a deciple a student and they are teachers
But i was raised learning
To do something positive that will in lighten me and never be a sevent to a human they think this is a new day but to me its another day
Another day in the light side
Trying to inhance my tomorrow
Its too blury waiting for the deleting of this day to happen while sitting on a stool and following the shade
Another day
Nov 9, 2015
Nov 9, 2015 at 12:06 PM UTC
Another day in the blue
With people who are
Frenemies with the sun as
Hot as a burbinig stove plate
And the day as normal as the safari
Peope lack the energy to
Get thier inquiries so they send me as if i was a deciple a student and they are teachers
But i was raised learning
To do something positive that will in lighten me and never be a sevent to a human they think this is a new day but to me its another day
Another day in the light side
Trying to inhance my tomorrow
Its too blury waiting for the deleting of this day to happen while sitting on a stool and following the shade
Another day
Nov 9, 2015
Nov 9, 2015 at 10:50 AM UTC
the only way for a black to become a star
in this society
is to be labeled a n i double g er
how the **** can i progress?
when i live in a world full of n__z
thinkin' they made
when they livin' under the shade
of fear
subjugatin' to white mans stories
catchin' allegory,from the blk pastors
which are part of the plan
confusin' us with our own history
but i learned from the wise,open my eyes
spirits geared towards my mentality
broke the spiritual captivity now im free
from the power of destination
that we try to clutch in this world
ive shed many tears,no longer livin' in fear
laughter is gone cuz i know the truth is here
not scared to embrace it face it
my poor folks we doomed as a society
or better yet the whole **** nation
still facin allegation,from corrupt congregation
labeling thee a criminal to society
influencin' racism thinkin everybody with colored skin
is the perdition to sin,through reality when actuality
they skins pale as ****
nothin' but devils in guise
the serpents on a rise ya better recognize
im coming full throttle
put down that bottle of liquor
got many thinkin they strong???
when ya mentality is waaay gone!!!
high off that **** to get my mind right
blury sight,constant vivid dreams of the spirits at night
just the spiritual world tryna alert me that evil
finna come to an end,battle will just begin
close to armageddon no more lettin up this trigga
that stays hot so **** being a made n____
Dec 15, 2015
Dec 15, 2015 at 7:07 PM UTC
There are days when the music is too loud
And the grass looks too green
There are mornings when the **** crows too proud
And mama's cheerful wakeup call sounds too mean
There are days when my dreams seem too blury
When past nightmares seem too scary
There are mornings when my goals are too high
And my arms are too tired to reach for anything but the nigh
There are days when my head is too heavy to lift
When even my eyelids are too heavy to lift
There are mornings when my eyelashes are forced to sweep
My cheeks and be drenched in the tears I weep
There are days when I wake up and wish I had stayed asleep
Remembering how I didn't sleep last night counting sheep
The drowsy feeling of last night lapses into the insomnia of today
And the dreams of yesteryear bounce off my head like a faded light ray
Only on those days when the sweet music doesn't speak to my soul
And the green of the grass might as well be grey,
Do I shamefully and pitifully wallow
In the sweet, sticky, dry tears on my pillow
Only on those mornings when the **** crows continuously, monotony its tone
And mama calls for me to wake up, a few hours after my first wink, in a
voice that's a slow, dull, monotone
Do I shamefully and pitifully wallow
In the sweet, sticky, dry tears on my pillow
Miss Fit
Apr 20, 2019
Apr 20, 2019 at 3:44 PM UTC
I feel nothing
I see nothing
I smell nothing
It's like all feeling is gone
My heart is beating I think?
But it's all blury and cold
I try to stand up
But My body wont work
It's like im frozen to the earth
On my bed
With no where to go
I hear yelling
My mother voice is what im hearing
She saying my name over and over
I shut my eyes
I feel warm inside
So I open them
To see a fiery hell like place
I shut my eyes again
Hopping it's a bad dream
When I open my eyes
I find myself on my bed
With a pill bottle in my hand
I go downstires to see my mother on the phone
She was talking to him
The one that pushed me to this
Dec 5, 2015
Dec 5, 2015 at 11:37 PM UTC
Oh, my blury lighthouse at dawn
don't shine on my bed when I am sleeping
I have almost drowned in this room.
Recently when he said he was okay,
with having another women with us in bed.
This bed was a storm, my dear and I am never a boat goodenough.
I had her hair on my face and the sheet did not smell like him and me.
I almost drowned in the moment he closed his eyes and she put her hand on my breast.
The air was now tears and sea water and her fingertips and her ankle
and his wrist and
everything I managed to see,
blinking, like photographs.
I almost drowned and I didn't want to be at sea,
or be a boat.
Oh, my blury lighthouse at dawn
don't shine on my bed when I am sleeping.
I am safe here and it's dry
but I have already drowned in my head.
Mar 2, 2016
Mar 2, 2016 at 3:47 PM UTC