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"baldness" poems
I was acquainted with a raucous older man while I was still young and as impressionable as plaster-of-paris Malleable as I was He left a mark And now I watch you wearing baldness with classy elegance and donning beards with ease, easy on my eyes Can we fly through space safely?
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Aug 27, 2014
Aug 27, 2014 at 2:05 AM UTC
I used to think beards and baldness were intimidating
Beat-Up Old Car Vastly under-appreciated possession In dull blue, a MK1, no less, with original rust Inside lingering scents of Exchange and Mart top-notes of WD-40 and miscellaneous mix tapes A car like this gets into your life in lumpy knuckle-barking unsubtle ways, stays there in subtle ones That long drive back to Yorkshire in the quintessential exemplar Clutch cable snaps. ****** and Crap. Hardly helpful but can be accommodated with enough thought rough though it is on starter motor and nerves whenever anticipatory powers inadequate and we are forced to a complete red-light stop Brakes dodgier, exhaust noisier than ideal or legal Gender-ambiguous elderly tyres flirt outrageously with slick tarmac Showing their canvas underwear and male-pattern baldness Keeping this unstable, unsafe, unreliable ultimately essential lump of metal moving and on the road is a fine art Engaging, fluid and intense art; The Clash and The Specials Costello and The Cure in support A distraction then getting hauled over by plod somewhere near Bury St. Edmunds Thatcher's boys. Tax? MoT? Insurance? ID? No real interest shown Any passengers in the back? Clearly no.  Pickets?   Pickets? What? Please open the boot sir... Oh. On your way lad. Drive carefully I was, officer, I was More than you will ever know
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Feb 17, 2016
Feb 17, 2016 at 9:52 AM UTC
Memories of The Miners' Strike
Dear Poet Friends, the 4th of July is celebrated as American Independence Day. But for me it is a day of special significance since it is my contemporary & Texan poet friend Jon Stevens’ BIRTHDAY! We were both born in the same year 1943! Kindly join up to wish John ‘A Very Happy Birth Day’ with me! Today I dedicate an old poem of mine to John, titled - ‘’Time the Master Craftsman’’ composed way back in 2007 and posted on ‘Poenhunter.com’. Hope John and my Readers will like it! Thanks, - Raj, New Delhi.       TIME THE MASTER CRAFTSMAN! TIME the master craftsman first lets you grow. For you are his ‘marble slab’ on which his work will show! He silently chips away, his chisel makes no noise. For he is a master of stealth, and woks with elegant poise. We all take him for granted as time passes by. Spring gives way to Summer, as Autumn draws nigh. Then suddenly one day the mirror shows a face. The wrinkles are etched all over, and spread across your face. With deep furrows on your forehead, even a shiny baldness shows. The sculptor has done his work both steady and slow! Your eyes get set deeper, with blotches on your skin. Your face begins to shrink, with a toothless child-like grin. Time the master craftsman has now perfected his art. He remains surrounded by other slabs for his chipping work to start! -By Raj Nandy 04 July 2016 A VERY HAPPY BIRTH DAY TO JOHN STEVENS OF TEXAS &                   WISHING HIM BEST OF HEALTH.
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Jul 3, 2016
Jul 3, 2016 at 10:33 AM UTC
TIME THE MASTER CRAFTSMAN! (Dedicated to John Stevens on his Birthday on the 4th of July)
Dear Poet Friends, the 4th of July is celebrated as American Independence Day. But for me it is a day of special significance since it is my contemporary & Texan poet friend Jon Stevens’ BIRTHDAY! We were both born in the same year 1943! Kindly join up to wish John ‘A Very Happy Birth Day’ with me! Today I dedicate an old poem of mine to John, titled - ‘’Time the Master Craftsman’’ composed way back in 2007 and posted on ‘Poenhunter.com’. Hope John and my Readers will like it! Thanks, - Raj, New Delhi.       TIME THE MASTER CRAFTSMAN! TIME the master craftsman first lets you grow. For you are his ‘marble slab’ on which his work will show! He silently chips away, his chisel makes no noise. For he is a master of stealth, and woks with elegant poise. We all take him for granted as time passes by. Spring gives way to Summer, as Autumn draws nigh. Then suddenly one day the mirror shows a face. The wrinkles are etched all over, and spread across your face. With deep furrows on your forehead, even a shiny baldness shows. The sculptor has done his work both steady and slow! Your eyes get set deeper, with blotches on your skin. Your face begins to shrink, with a toothless child-like grin. Time the master craftsman has now perfected his art. He remains surrounded by other slabs for his chipping work to start! -By Raj Nandy 04 July 2016 A VERY HAPPY BIRTH DAY TO JOHN STEVENS OF TEXAS &                   WISHING HIM BEST OF HEALTH.
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24
In schooldays my aim was terribly perfect add to that an attitude unfair a soft teacher was an easy found target not one bald head was allowed to be spared. The moment the poor man turned to blackboard his baldness shined as a gaming site the sleeping devil woke up and deep roared dispatched were chalks on windborne flight. Only a few did land on wrong place but found mostly their rightful targets and bore no qualm the thrower's face when cheered by the fellow classmates. As the victim turned with ire's full steam nursing stings that came with good force we in the gang were such an honest team never revealed it came from what source. It went on smooth till luck failed one day has to end all games one once starts a traitor midst us the secret gave away memory of the thrashing badly hurts.
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Oct 26, 2015
Oct 26, 2015 at 11:30 AM UTC
The Game I Played
Scanning from the ground upward over my torso Reveals an disturbing inventory of dysfunction brachymetatarsia, in both feet! Unequal leg length Reconditioned knees Atrophied right quadriceps Hernia Scar L4 & L5 Vertebrae way too chummy Are these ******* Are these jowls? Gum recession Moderate gastro intestinal reflux Three diopter challenge in both eyes Dermatochelassis, left and right Scintillating scotoma Male pattern baldness – rear solar panel developing. And yet when asked I reply, Oh, I’m fine! I’m fine. And you, and you, still love me.
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Jul 23, 2014
Jul 23, 2014 at 12:53 AM UTC
My Medical Inventory, or Erectile Is Not My Only Dysfunction
**Like the merchant who claimed to have a spear that could penetrate anything And a shield that nothing could penetrate This is a paradox, and it will be loved by many For the same reasons that many hate As the wise young man with dreadlocks Grows older and wiser... though baldness is his fate He knows when to slow his pace, where haste would make him late In due time his meekness would pay off And they will say "His insignificance made him great." Fly on the wall... unseen to all Watching and laying in wait In his principles he remains grounded, which allows him to levitate Above the chaos And find sanity in madness Sanity... to calculate To make choices, from experience of indecision Without taking aim, to hit his target with utmost precision A rational mind, complimented by gut feeling Result oriented, but if they found out his method It would probably leave them perplexed, like an honest man caught stealing.**
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Mar 29, 2012
Mar 29, 2012 at 4:19 AM UTC
Paradox.
I see you in the Fall The red leaves whipping in the wind like your hair flowing behind you. The chaotic movement connect to something strong sturdy safe. I see you in the fall. The wind screaming in my ear like you when the schizophrenia kicked in terrifying but beautiful in a broken sort of way. I see you in the fall. Like the flowers that bend towards the slightest glimmer of sunlight just as you would hold onto any ray of hope that came your way like it was the last time you'd see it I see you in the fall as the trees show their branches it leaves falling like your hair did Beautiful despite it's baldness I saw you in the fall. But now it's winter and like the leaves on the trees You are gone.
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Sep 16, 2014
Sep 16, 2014 at 3:17 PM UTC
I see you in the fall (Joe Cole Challenge)
You are my soul mate, there are many like us But this one is ours, My soul mate is my best friend she is my life Without me my soul mate I she useless without her I am useless I will treat my soul mate right, I will be your shelter your armor your strength I will be your sword your protector your shield I will learn your weaknesses your strength your dreams your desires and your fears I will ever guard you against the ravages and trials of this world I will We will become part of each other, we will I will slay every dragon I will clear every obstacle I will pick you up when you fall, take care of you when you fall ill I will be your strength when you are weak When you cannot continue I will carry you When you are sick I will care for you When you cry I will whipe away the tears I will sacrifice all to have you at peace When our children are hurt I will heal them I will be strong enough for the both of us May you not want while I am with you When there is work to be done I will do it I will be the wind beneath your wings I will be at your back every step you take I will miss you when you are afar You will be in my heart forever and always We will give each other names which we only call each other We will know each other through body and soul I will know your wants needs dreams and desires I will be the man of your dreams I will give you all your heart desires and needs I will give my all and ask for nothing in return but your love My love is unconditional Through sorrow and desease Through wrinkles and baldness My love will never end even after breathe lives my body I will not let you give up on yourself even when you feel like you cannot continue Our lives will be entwined and ever seamless There is nothing we together cannot accomplish We were destined Our lives are written in the stars We will be together one day And that day will be the beginning of our beautiful lives together God has brought us together and nothing can break us Theses things I promise to you and to you alone for all time Before God I swear this creed my soul mate and I are the masters of our future we are the perfect match we are opposites we complete each other, So be it for the rest of our days until eternity embraces us and there is no one else but us.
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Nov 12, 2010
Nov 12, 2010 at 7:27 AM UTC
Soulmates Creed
You are my soul mate, there are many like us But this one is ours, My soul mate is my best friend she is my life Without me my soul mate I she useless without her I am useless I will treat my soul mate right, I will be your shelter your armor your strength I will be your sword your protector your shield I will learn your weaknesses your strength your dreams your desires and your fears I will ever guard you against the ravages and trials of this world I will We will become part of each other, we will I will slay every dragon I will clear every obstacle I will pick you up when you fall, take care of you when you fall ill I will be your strength when you are weak When you cannot continue I will carry you When you are sick I will care for you When you cry I will whipe away the tears I will sacrifice all to have you at peace When our children are hurt I will heal them I will be strong enough for the both of us May you not want while I am with you When there is work to be done I will do it I will be the wind beneath your wings I will be at your back every step you take I will miss you when you are afar You will be in my heart forever and always We will give each other names which we only call each other We will know each other through body and soul I will know your wants needs dreams and desires I will be the man of your dreams I will give you all your heart desires and needs I will give my all and ask for nothing in return but your love My love is unconditional Through sorrow and desease Through wrinkles and baldness My love will never end even after breathe lives my body I will not let you give up on yourself even when you feel like you cannot continue Our lives will be entwined and ever seamless There is nothing we together cannot accomplish We were destined Our lives are written in the stars We will be together one day And that day will be the beginning of our beautiful lives together God has brought us together and nothing can break us Theses things I promise to you and to you alone for all time Before God I swear this creed my soul mate and I are the masters of our future we are the perfect match we are opposites we complete each other, So be it for the rest of our days until eternity embraces us and there is no one else but us.
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43
I'm the real Chuck Bass I am Nigel Barker **** Noted Fashion Photographer. i engulf all men, women and children with my succulent odour especially when i use the flames of the baldinator. it makes me bolder... and balder Baldness is my strength, chutzpah, and truth. Smize all you like Tyra I will always come out on top. I have the passion, the power, the Porsche. model ******* work for this, for me. My scalp illuminates the night leading me up and along the path of the nigh. Serena van der Woodsen your Pantene waves of glory will fall victim to my patent shine now let me beam fiercely PERFECTION
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Jan 22, 2013
Jan 22, 2013 at 8:20 PM UTC
An Ode to Nigel
Holy Crap, They Sold My Name! No big deal, your name, your email, bought n' sold daily, Like a baseball card, your picture and vital stats are on the internet, Your credit card in the fine print tells you they love you much, But the data they collect, might get credited to such and such. You're fair game if your sign up for anything. Now I know I am getting on in years, Tho spry rhymes with die, I flatly deny Any notion that My great beyond is just around the corner! But Holy Crap, They Sold My Name! Got a color brochure Suggesting that when my travels are over, A nice place to rest my head might be St. Michael's Cemetery. St. Michael's Cemetery 7202 Astoria Blvd, East Elmhurst (718) 278-3240 Friday hours 7:00 am–5:00 pm In case you want to check it out too... Tho I live not in the Borough of Queens County, My zip code but a hop, skip and jump away, The cemetery adjacent to the Grand Central Parkway Which is actually quite thoughtful of The mass marketer who dreamed up this scheme (And got paid a plentiful amount of bounty). My kids could wave as they drive by, On the way to LaGuardia or JFK, (airports) And say, guilt free, they visit me regularly! Sadly, their plot foiled, I will be buried in New Jersey soil, Near to my pop, who liked the Wide open spaces of suburbia And shopping on Route 4, Where the selection is great And there is no sales tax. But Holy Crap, They Sold My Name, And I am now target marketed, Niched, pretty soon the boys from AARP Will come calling, reminding me of the gap Tween Medicare and the poor house! Ok ok,  grow up you say, tho your hair is full, And not even a hint of baldness shines forth, Nonetheless, its color is zebra striped gray, And when someone says they got my back, I think, please, please take it and keep it.... Oh yeah, Dear St. Mikes You might ask for some of your money back, Cause this sily scribe is a member of the tribe, Some call "those ***** (hint: it rhymes with Mikes)," It starts with K and ends in yikes! But thanks for thinking of me anyway.
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May 24, 2013
May 24, 2013 at 5:32 PM UTC
Holy Crap, They Sold My Name!
Holy Crap, They Sold My Name! No big deal, your name, your email, bought n' sold daily, Like a baseball card, your picture and vital stats are on the internet, Your credit card in the fine print tells you they love you much, But the data they collect, might get credited to such and such. You're fair game if your sign up for anything. Now I know I am getting on in years, Tho spry rhymes with die, I flatly deny Any notion that My great beyond is just around the corner! But Holy Crap, They Sold My Name! Got a color brochure Suggesting that when my travels are over, A nice place to rest my head might be St. Michael's Cemetery. St. Michael's Cemetery 7202 Astoria Blvd, East Elmhurst (718) 278-3240 Friday hours 7:00 am–5:00 pm In case you want to check it out too... Tho I live not in the Borough of Queens County, My zip code but a hop, skip and jump away, The cemetery adjacent to the Grand Central Parkway Which is actually quite thoughtful of The mass marketer who dreamed up this scheme (And got paid a plentiful amount of bounty). My kids could wave as they drive by, On the way to LaGuardia or JFK, (airports) And say, guilt free, they visit me regularly! Sadly, their plot foiled, I will be buried in New Jersey soil, Near to my pop, who liked the Wide open spaces of suburbia And shopping on Route 4, Where the selection is great And there is no sales tax. But Holy Crap, They Sold My Name, And I am now target marketed, Niched, pretty soon the boys from AARP Will come calling, reminding me of the gap Tween Medicare and the poor house! Ok ok,  grow up you say, tho your hair is full, And not even a hint of baldness shines forth, Nonetheless, its color is zebra striped gray, And when someone says they got my back, I think, please, please take it and keep it.... Oh yeah, Dear St. Mikes You might ask for some of your money back, Cause this sily scribe is a member of the tribe, Some call "those ***** (hint: it rhymes with Mikes)," It starts with K and ends in yikes! But thanks for thinking of me anyway.
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57
I saw an old blue jay today unashamed of his baldness. His beautiful crown reduced to wispy sprouts of gray, every which way like a patient after chemo. *Beauty cannot exist without suffering* I saw our rabbit’s kits yesterday, they looked like little piglets nestled in her nest of fur and hay, plump and tender bodies, tempting feasts for creatures of the night. *Peace cannot exist without fear* I saw a hummingbird this morning and heard her vibrating chirp. Cautious yet eager she bobbed and dipped for sustenance a thousand miles from home like a prisoner of war. *Home cannot exist without longing* I see an orangey moon tonight pierced across the breast by clouds, in halves instead of whole. A symbol of the way things are, a broken world that few take time to notice. *Consciousness cannot exist without ignorance* I looked in your eyes just now and saw love. Sickness, disease, danger and fear, loneliness, loss and uncertainty is, was, and forever will be washed away in their blue, at least for me. *Certainty cannot exist without love* Of this I am certain
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Jan 3, 2018
Jan 3, 2018 at 4:34 PM UTC
Certainty
OK, I can no longer say I’ve got a receding hairline and sure everyone can see the plain fact, the bald fact - but there are pleasures, you know I’ve saved heaps on hair gel and shampoos and conditioners (enough I think to fund my retirement) and I can actually feel the cool air (no one can call me hot-headed) and the great thing now is everyone says with all honesty I’m **** as Sean Connery (what they actually think or say behind my back is none of my business) but the best blessing of all is I never need to look for my comb (I confess I was always misplacing it) and so I don’t need to reach for my wife’s comb and so she lies as still as a cat and she doesn’t need to roar like a lioness first thing in the morning: Don’t you dare touch my comb! Ah, the blessings that linger like so many halos in eminent baldness
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Feb 19, 2012
Feb 19, 2012 at 3:55 PM UTC
on the pleasures of my baldness
Had I not shaved my head My hair would grow wildly Directionless, as the wind blows On wintry days, battering trees Pushing branches to and fro Without symmetry or sympathy, I would look boyish from afar A little disconcerting, my face Framed with greying beard A little desperate to hold onto The passing years as my youth Recedes into male pattern baldness, (The genes don't lie), it would be An extension of my personality Unruly, childish, carefree, immature This is how I could express myself Had I not shaved my head Wanting to keep it all inside.
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Jun 23, 2019
Jun 23, 2019 at 10:04 AM UTC
Hair
For every emotion songs have already been written: poetries and sonnets, angry beats and ****** ballads. My more positive, happier self is an extra-terrestrial being from galaxies far away: No cutting off fins from sharks. Unlike lizards’ tails fins don’t grow back. Love. Respect. No ceramic idols lining the windows their empty gazes crawling up your spine. No empty promises. No magic cures for baldness. Phones on mute during class. Eat sensibly. Take a breather – life is not a race to the finish line. Have cleaner washrooms. Less unwanted criticisms. Less trance. Love thy country. Pin-striped shorts from M&S; Stronger will. No slitting wrists or overdoses. Suspend disbelief. No secret candy stashes. Do your laundry without being told. Omit racism, misanthropy. Wilted flowers by the windowsill. No secret phone calls in the middle of the night. Who are you afraid of? Almost and nearly don’t count. Come home. Forgive favorite band for disappointing album. Be kinder to puppies. Brood, not rant. Skulk, not stalk. Get my name right. Don’t drink and drive. There are no gays, no lesbians, only people with feelings. Fight, not flight. Have more 24-hour pizza places. Avoid politicians, traitors, lawyers. No throwing around words like vociferance, vociferate, vociferous. Accept fate – don’t be a martyr; One day everything fades so hold on to all your post-it memory until every star turns to dust.
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Jul 11, 2015
Jul 11, 2015 at 6:03 AM UTC
The Grocery List
Dear pops 1) You died and will never get to see your grandchildren.  I always used to tell you if you didn't eat better you wouldn't get to see them. I was right 2) I told you if you didn't eat better you would get diabetes. In the end they cut out your pancreas and I became right 3) I always thought hospitals were cool. Thanks to you I can't bear thinking of one 4) Why did you never say you were proud of me? 5)Why did you never say you were proud of me? 6) Why did you never say you were proud of me? 7) Never. Not once 8) Were you proud of me? 9) Why was it always about my looks? 10) Why was I always annoying to you?  *edit - why did you always find me annoying? 11) Did I matter? 12) Did you think I was smart? 13) Did you think I would become something? 14) Did you think I was a stupid girl who would outgrow her rebelliousness 15) It's been 17 years and I haven't 16) Did you think I was smart? 17) You never thought anything I did mattered 18) You always mocked me, made fun of me, never listened to what I had to say 19) You thought I was rude when I wasn't 20) You labelled me all the time 21) There's a small part of me that's glad you died because now I can love a girl more easily. Now I can love a boy of a different race more easily. Now I can speak to my mother more easily 22) Did you love me?  It didn't seem so 23) I always thought my life would change if I lost someone I loved. It didn't ,not much 24) I'm always looking for older men to tell me I'm intelligent. Your best friend. My uncle. My teacher. 25) Guess why 26) I'm damaged. I was damaged before you died and a large part of why is you 27) The boys and I always said you reminded us of Homer Simpson because of your gut and baldness and mild foolishness. In the end you were so ravaged by jaundice you were as yellow as him. I will never watch The Simpsons again
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Nov 2, 2014
Nov 2, 2014 at 2:04 PM UTC
things I want to say to my dead father
Dear pops 1) You died and will never get to see your grandchildren.  I always used to tell you if you didn't eat better you wouldn't get to see them. I was right 2) I told you if you didn't eat better you would get diabetes. In the end they cut out your pancreas and I became right 3) I always thought hospitals were cool. Thanks to you I can't bear thinking of one 4) Why did you never say you were proud of me? 5)Why did you never say you were proud of me? 6) Why did you never say you were proud of me? 7) Never. Not once 8) Were you proud of me? 9) Why was it always about my looks? 10) Why was I always annoying to you?  *edit - why did you always find me annoying? 11) Did I matter? 12) Did you think I was smart? 13) Did you think I would become something? 14) Did you think I was a stupid girl who would outgrow her rebelliousness 15) It's been 17 years and I haven't 16) Did you think I was smart? 17) You never thought anything I did mattered 18) You always mocked me, made fun of me, never listened to what I had to say 19) You thought I was rude when I wasn't 20) You labelled me all the time 21) There's a small part of me that's glad you died because now I can love a girl more easily. Now I can love a boy of a different race more easily. Now I can speak to my mother more easily 22) Did you love me?  It didn't seem so 23) I always thought my life would change if I lost someone I loved. It didn't ,not much 24) I'm always looking for older men to tell me I'm intelligent. Your best friend. My uncle. My teacher. 25) Guess why 26) I'm damaged. I was damaged before you died and a large part of why is you 27) The boys and I always said you reminded us of Homer Simpson because of your gut and baldness and mild foolishness. In the end you were so ravaged by jaundice you were as yellow as him. I will never watch The Simpsons again
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28
The Unbearable Winter’s mist The winter’s mist, peculiar, the sky augurs blue and sun mellow, but clouded vision begets and besets, my own and owned melancholy vision is a consequential snake like blurry speckled band, of my own drawing, covering my eyes, when I read Márai‘s wit, write, legal writ, but with my corrected add of the un and my own self assigned grade is a bright red F eye of the beholder Life becomes unbearable *”when one has come to terms with who one is, both in one's own eyes and in the eyes of the world. We all of us must come to terms with what and who we are, and recognize that this wisdom is not going to earn us any praise, that life is not going to pin a medal on us for recognizing and enduring our own vanity or egoism or baldness or our potbelly. No, the secret is that there's no reward and we have to endure our characters and our natures as best we can, because no amount of experience or insight is going to rectify our deficiencies, our self-regard, or our cupidity. We have to learn that our desires do not find any real echo in the world. We have to accept that the people we love do not love us, or not in the way we hope. We have to accept betrayal and disloyalty, and, hardest of all, that someone is finer than we are in character or intelligence.”* Sándor Márai
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Jan 10, 2024
Jan 10, 2024 at 2:36 PM UTC
The Unbearable Winter’s Mist (eye of the beholder)
I saw him... Ripping the posters of hope to the ground The bear stuffed. Cardboard box a home he never dreamt of An abandoned minefield of metal gongs.....still clanging With life encircled on its rim, clearly in full erosion One eye had begun to fall, clinging on by a theatrical thread A small hole had appeared, the left ear on hard times He looked  sad...his 'Bravo' days departed, kicked like an Old tin can scattering nailed organs, strewn carelessly The haphazards hurt the most; those that landed head first They burrowed into the soft fur, grizzling through Lack of gripe water to anaesthetise the first cut Fur ***** were out of stock, cleaned right off the shelves The posters painted with high definition, torn with sad Hand shakes. Lined up ******* into fists, like used tissues Their eye level aim skimmed the parcelled plots and slotted Into basket cases, breathing in ***** dumpsters before their due date Shrugging it off didn't work, shouldered earrings...stuck in rutted Situ for too long. You came between them and the tombs of truth Caused a nasty virus to accelerate. Baldness stole the soft Funishings from your limbs in between the stuffing years
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Mar 11, 2013
Mar 11, 2013 at 4:16 PM UTC
The Bear Has Feelings
Isn't SPAM a pain in the rear? NOT the canned Spam that you can eat; I mean the spam in your email mailbox. It's so annoying and so indiscreet. "Mark as Spam" sometimes works, But obnoxious messages still get through. It seems as though you always have tons Of unwanted email staring at you. Have you seen "Six Months to Skinny" Or the "One-Pound-a-Day Diet"? There's always "Hi, you're going to love this" Or "Want a good time?" That one's a riot. What about "Help with Alcohol," "Penny Stock Tips," or "Erectile Dysfunction"? Or "Toenail Fungus"? Yikes! Please spare me. They send out this nonsense with no compunction! Breast augmentation? That I don't want. Baldness cures? Well, if I let it Be a problem and needed some snake oil, I know exactly where to get it. I often get messages dealing with meds. Those boring messages always fall flat. And then there's "Male Enhancement Madness." No thanks; I will pass on that. Have you received the message that goes Something like "Hi, my name is Pam"? The one that I find really hilarious Is the one that reads, "This is not spam!" Despite precautions, when checking your email, You're bound to find SPAM--lying in wait. I have to say that I much prefer it Not in my mailbox, but instead on my plate. - by Bob B
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Oct 10, 2016
Oct 10, 2016 at 9:08 AM UTC
The Curse of Spam
Go ahead take a good look. Go on breathe it in. I have a gap in my two front teeth. Still get the occasional acne And male pattern baldness Well I need that like a real dad. Really I don't. Look at my finger nails. I barely have them. It's called stress, maybe anxiety. We put labels on juice. Why not emotion?
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Mar 29, 2013
Mar 29, 2013 at 3:03 AM UTC
Speech
You are twenty days late In your response Who do you think you are? That I’d jump at your thumbspeak? It was a passing thing Thinking about you now With your flecked baldness Your Cheshire cat teeth Glowing against Your ***** black skin Your disease A foul smell In the arid air The long stretch Of your tawny arms That once carried The weight Of your insecurities Your sweaty palms Like milk The sweat In your back Your unpunctuated sentences And your shallow joys… You are twenty days late But you’ve lost me On the fourth day
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Oct 21, 2013
Oct 21, 2013 at 11:45 PM UTC
20 DAYS LATE
It pains me to say that my ***** is only half an inch long. It's extremely embarrassing because I have a tiny ******* I never use urinals while out in public, I only use stalls. I can not let other men know that my ***** is so small. I got so mad at my ex-wife that I wanted to beat her. She was going to tell my friends and co-workers about my tiny peter. I said if she exposed me, I'd expose her baldness and that she wears a wig. My ex-wife had our marriage annulled because my wiener isn't very big. Women say that ***** size isn't important to them but it's more important than they admit. A blind date started making fun of my tiny wiener so I started making fun of her tiny **** When it comes to being successful with women, I don't have a chance. If you have a small **** don't let anybody see it, keep it in your pants.
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Mar 15, 2019
Mar 15, 2019 at 8:40 PM UTC
Half an Inch
I glaze a look at the street, from our apartment window. You are coming slowly, teetering one leg in front other, with back slightly hunched forward, burdened with sleepless nights and yesterday’s undones. Vibrant spirit once you had is lost, tossed among crowded train wagons, useless meetings and broken deadlines. One vein in the left corner of your forehead, swells, pulses in the rhythm of your dark, fuddled thoughts as unremitting, sprouting baldness reflects evening lights. Still, I smile, for you are here, with me in all this madness we call life, half diced with wants and haunts that braid every tomorrow we greet together. I would like to put you in a different frame, picture of nor “Yeses” nor “Nos”, just us, being us, each moment celebrating without lamenting for what “ifs” or “shoulds” and “coulds”. Still, I smile, as I watch you battle your restless leg syndrome, wrestling to sooth demanding expectations, lifted bars for higher remunerations, in constant marathon of best comparison, for you care, you dare. I take your hand with eyes of approval, life’s ****** and gigolette, ready to play each day’s illusive roulette.
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Dec 4, 2014
Dec 4, 2014 at 5:23 AM UTC
In a different frame
How much was enough As her daily breaths Were strains Each movement Cautiously taken In order to avoid pain With every day Restricting more and more Her body retreating Shrinking into A thin skin creature Few ever knew Spirit crumbling In waiting Leaving almost baldness Goblinesque features Till the end
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Aug 3, 2015
Aug 3, 2015 at 2:07 PM UTC
The Dying
Look at Prince Charles' profile see the high forehead and receding baldness the jutting nose, a  strong noble Grecian look take a look at Prince William, same features his is even more defined so our plebs on the Clapham omnibus declares quite seriously that these lovely royal profiles resembles a horse neigh, neigh do not scold the plebs they see only what the lower plebs brains sees and perhaps because Royals have a strong historical link with Horses a royal maiden had at one time taken a horse to bed Come to think of it, Catherine The Great Empress of Russia reportedly did take a horse for a bit of jiggery porky so maybe there's  a bit of equine bloodline in all royal lineages after-all the horse is considered a handsome proud and noble beast So I embrace my horse ancestry and can also confirm that I am packed as a horse in the lower region as well.... Any clean and disease-free female wanting a ride is welcomed please contact me at Buck house and bring a big hat along NO, not for my head...you silly twit......
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May 26, 2019
May 26, 2019 at 8:45 PM UTC
Neigh...neigh, twit.....
Interesting that we older men now flag our own decline Composted in this shameful ruse enacted over time. We point to prime examples of our keynote men of age De Niro, Keitel, Clooney, Hurt…all class acts, on the stage. Take Clarkson, Rush, O’Toole and Bean…they brim like vintage wine, Having come to terms with baldness and the sagging paunch decline. Like them, we’ve learned the lesson of absurdity of life, Where the trick to aged contentedness, is to pacify the wife. An awareness of fragility in that pending death is near, Is offset by the peace of mind of subdued *** and beer. We say, to Hell with gradual fade of hairline, health and wealth When a crystal glass of single malt can smooth it all by stealth. So quell the racing, thudding heart, lean back in wisdom’s shine, Secure in that with shaky hand…We can still quaff vintage wine. And should the youth lose patience with a hesitancy there We can usually still their arrogance with a knowing senior stare, And should there be a question of a competency still? Remind them their tomorrow too.. is running fast downhill. Don’t sweat it with the walker, for it all arrives too soon And sweetly on the wireless there was Perry Como’s croon, Take comfort in the fact that soon they’ll put us out to grass When oblivion comes creeping in Altzheimers foggy clasp. To tabulate the good and bad within this lifetime’s span Leaves the negatives predominant, should truth reveal her hand, It becomes a bit obsessive when the mind’s allowed to dwell For around the corner, probably, …. is a one way trip to Hell. M. Pukehana Paradise Auckland NZ May 7 2014
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May 6, 2014
May 6, 2014 at 3:41 PM UTC
The Big Fade
Interesting that we older men now flag our own decline Composted in this shameful ruse enacted over time. We point to prime examples of our keynote men of age De Niro, Keitel, Clooney, Hurt…all class acts, on the stage. Take Clarkson, Rush, O’Toole and Bean…they brim like vintage wine, Having come to terms with baldness and the sagging paunch decline. Like them, we’ve learned the lesson of absurdity of life, Where the trick to aged contentedness, is to pacify the wife. An awareness of fragility in that pending death is near, Is offset by the peace of mind of subdued *** and beer. We say, to Hell with gradual fade of hairline, health and wealth When a crystal glass of single malt can smooth it all by stealth. So quell the racing, thudding heart, lean back in wisdom’s shine, Secure in that with shaky hand…We can still quaff vintage wine. And should the youth lose patience with a hesitancy there We can usually still their arrogance with a knowing senior stare, And should there be a question of a competency still? Remind them their tomorrow too.. is running fast downhill. Don’t sweat it with the walker, for it all arrives too soon And sweetly on the wireless there was Perry Como’s croon, Take comfort in the fact that soon they’ll put us out to grass When oblivion comes creeping in Altzheimers foggy clasp. To tabulate the good and bad within this lifetime’s span Leaves the negatives predominant, should truth reveal her hand, It becomes a bit obsessive when the mind’s allowed to dwell For around the corner, probably, …. is a one way trip to Hell. M. Pukehana Paradise Auckland NZ May 7 2014
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