"accomplishing" poems
Mania. Everything was good when you were with me.
I felt normal. The chains bolted to my eyelids where magically gone, like the money in your bank account after a heavy, drunken, stupor & forthright gambling spree.
The spear in my side that your twin brother, depression, threw inside me was no longer twisting up my insides. Thank you.
This feels like a goodbye letter but I'm actually trying to hold on to you. You give me life. Your twin takes it away and he rash-burns my face in it.
I was accomplishing all the things; skipping from one stone to the next without feat. "Flutter your wings and dance," is your motto.
But like all good things, you drive me away, knowing that I'll see you again.
Try as I might, I remain faithful to you, but you commit adultery every week.
Sometimes you demand my time, even when I'm low. I cry for hours with your natural dichotomy, not because I can't decide--I can--but because you and your twin rip me apart in twain, changing my reality as sure as the rain falls in the Amazon.
The demons call out to me, whispering evil into my mind. I believe every evil thing when I am not armed with your brilliance. I lose that perspective, every time, and sometimes immediately.
Your twin brother and cousin visit me early in the morning right before bed time. If my doubts and fears are real, then my mind's eye is experiencing a real reality, and thus I am as I feel, like a plastic bag tumbling in the wind.
Yet, everyone reminds me that I am but a joke and a comic, one which not even you can trust.
The biggest asset I lose when you choose to cheat on me is your energy--that precious flow that bears my creative passion.
But now I am barren, an unfit conduit that is incapable of maintaining that flow. The demon upon me powerfully weaves its tapestry of sludge that encases my mind.
My mind, it's the only thing I have left. And yet, I can never trust it.
You've lied to me before and you'll lie to me in the future.
But for now, I'll have to make do with your half-truths.
Until next time.
Jan 17, 2018
Jan 17, 2018 at 3:55 AM UTC
Law,
All ye termites hacking ants are you without sin?
Twisting the law to your greed thus dethroning justice
Thou that dis-virgins the law to suit your selfish taste,
Did not equity say that none is above the law?
Money-thirsty vultures seeking positions to occupy.
Law hackers depriving justice and equity of her rights
Equity and justice now lives in shame of her virginity,
Almighty termite, do not your deeds speak evil of your sins?
I weep blood for justice and equity whose daughters you *****
Is there none whose conscience still breathe or lives?
Power-driven termites making uncountable promises
Yet accomplishing none but your calculated interests.
Equity,
All ye leaders that preach peace, are you not corrupt minded?
En-slaving accounts meant for public welfare
Yet you claim to have the peoples interest in mind,
Did not the law command you to let equity and justice smile?
Parasitic predators hi-jacking the country's economy
Filthy termites proclaiming injustice upon powerless ants,
Justice hackers, do not your conscience judge your judgments?
I wish that you allow justice and equity have her way.
Law benders at whose feet equity and justice bow
Rippers of the law, at your hands justice is twisted,
Is your nature as humans so inhumane?
Little wonder the earth lives in fear of your tyranny.
Justice,
All ye slanders of the law, why not sheath your swords of corruption?
Your unchecked power has broken the wings of justice
Thereby making equity a widow without a husband,
Remember your oaths to serve with justice and equity;
Did you deceive the ants that voted you in to serve them?
Chameleons occupying seats of filtered ambitions
Woe betide your conscience for refusing to judge you,
Are you not guilty of molesting the law?
I mourn for the shameful death of equity and justice.
You that crafts the law to fit your suit of corruption
Remember a day comes when justice will laugh again,
And you being powerful cannot escape the law of Karma.
Karma,
Murderers of the law, will you also bribe karma?
I doubt if you can buy the law of karma with money.
Thou whose gluttony corrupts justice and equity,
Don't you feel guilty that you disvirgined the law?
Equity and justice now roams about in nakedness,
You that preach the law, are you true to yourself?
Heartless spiders cob-webbing the law to entangle poor ants
Did not equity bid you come to justice with clean hands?
Yet with filthy garments you condemn innocent ants;
Mind you that someday the law will rise again.
All ye scavengers of justice and hackers of the law,
Do you think you can **** the law of Karma?
Dec 10, 2015
Dec 10, 2015 at 10:22 AM UTC
Picture of girls face: 10 likes
Picture of girls face featuring slightly/damn near totally visible ***** bumps: 5000 likes.
What the **** people, its the SAME GIRL.
Her **** are there in BOTH PICTURES yo.
But due to the difference in likes, there's no doubt as to what the true focal point of the photographs are.
Honestly, I'd much rather see a picture of a ladies face instead of one featuring the awesome breasticles.
Because, while those **** do, without a doubt, totally rock, they should also be respected and like, viewed as something special for only that certain special person to see.
CONTAIN YOUR **** YOUNG FEMALES FOR THE LOVE OF ******* GOD.
You aren't attracting very respectable fellows by being so flaunty.
People that are into you only for your tits/various other dank body parts you may or may not have, will most definitely end up hurting the beautiful blood pumping anomaly that lies behind said ****
I mean it's your body, do what you want to do with it, but there are more then enough **** bouncing around the world right now to clog our minds with sexuality and distract us from accomplishing things as it is.
WE DON'T NEED YOUR **** IN OUR FACE.
not to mention, some day you're going to find a man or a woman that's going to love you for the super radical person that you are, and to them, your **** will just be like, the most awesome bonus, and by covering up just a bit more for all the numb skulled hard dicked mother ******* this world seems to have an endless supply of, you'll make that special person feel so so so so so so sooooo much more special when THEY get to see them.
You know what i'm saying?
We're in a society where your **** can take you further then your personality can and it's ******* ********
Aug 11, 2014
Aug 11, 2014 at 5:24 PM UTC
everyone wants to be an architect. everyone wants to be a doctor. everyone wants to be a celebrity. everyone wants to be an author. everyone wants to be a scientist. everyone wants to be a rock star. everyone wants to be a professional football player. everyone wants to be a photographer. everyone wants to be an artist. everyone wants to be a news reporter. everyone wants to be a lawyer. everyone wants to be the president. everyone wants to be a professor. everyone wants to be a pilot. everyone wants to be an actor. everyone wants to be a therapist. everyone wants to be a business owner. everyone wants to be an interior designer. everyone wants to be a pastor. everyone wants to be a magician. everyone wants to be a dentist. everyone wants to be a chef. everyone wants to be a film director. everyone wants to be something. everyone wants to be someone.
nobody wants to be something they don’t want to be. but nobody wants to do anything to be who they want to be. you have a goal. you have a dream. who said dreams can’t be achieved? nobody. one of the greatest and most powerful feelings is accomplishing something you once thought to be impossible. maybe your goal is in fact impossible. maybe there’s no way in hell that you can be who you want to be. maybe it is a dream. maybe it is a fantasy. so what do you do? you do the impossible.
make it rain.
there’s somebody that you love. somebody who’s smile makes your day. somebody who makes your week when you make them laugh. somebody you wish you knew better. somebody who could fix every bad feeling you have in your life just by you being with them. and they don’t recognize what you would do for them. how much you would love and take care of them. how do you make somebody notice something that they can’t see? you do the impossible.
make it rain.
there’s a way to do everything. you just have to find it. the answer won’t just appear over night. you have to fall into your fantasy. walk into your dream, rip it out of your head, and make it the reality. and never give up. nothing is impossible.
everyone wants to be loved. everyone wants to be remembered. everyone wants to graduate. everyone wants to talk to god. everyone wants to climb a mountain. everyone wants to get their driver’s license. everyone wants to get a job. everyone wants to get her attention. everyone wants to be his girl. everyone wants to learn an instrument. everyone wants to make more money. everyone wants to never stop smiling. everyone wants to win the lottery. everyone wants to score the winning point. everyone wants to be a superhero. everyone wants to grow taller. everyone wants to be able to walk again. everyone wants to be able to see. everyone wants to be able to hear. everyone wants to have a home. everyone wants to bring him back to life. everyone wants to have a shirt to wear in the winter. everyone wants a family for christmas. everyone wants a best friend. everyone wants one friend. everyone wants to take the gun from his head. everyone wants to save the world. everyone wants to feed them all. everyone wants to build them a home. everyone wants to get rid of her cancer. everyone wants to bring their soldier home. everyone wants to stop racism. everyone wants to be gay without being judged. everyone wants to feel safe. everyone wants to turn their life around. everyone wants to…
make it rain, mr. architect.
Oct 9, 2012
Oct 9, 2012 at 2:05 AM UTC
Happy Mother’s Day to the person who’s always with me
To the one who helped me become the person I’m today
To the one who taught me to treat others how I treat myself
Happy Mother’s Day to the person whose approval I craved
To the one who helped me understand that nobody will ever care for me
To the one who taught me that I’m a piece of garbage myself
Happy Mother’s Day to the person whose laugh I was scared of
To the one who helped me know that I’m undeserving of love
To the one who taught me to hate the mirror image of myself
Happy Mother’s Day to the person whose voice haunts me
To the one who helped me avoid responsibility and criticism
To the one who taught me reasons why I should **** myself
Happy Mother’s Day to the person who made me scared of thinking
To the one who helped me breed hate in who fundamentally am
To the one who taught me that others will always be better than myself
Happy Mother’s Day to the person who made feel guilty of my depression
To the one who helped me find innovative ways to hurt me without a trail
To the one who taught me that everything wrong is a fault in myself
Happy Mother’s Day to the person who made me a mom to my siblings
To the one who helped me get rid of my carefree childhood joy
To the one who taught me that in life one can only care for themself
Happy Mother’s Day to the person who isolated me of the ones I loved
To the one who helps me know my worth in negative numbers
To the one who taught me jealousy and that I'm hers
Happy Mother’s Day to the person who fed me lies as facts
To the one who helped me befriend an ED princess
To the one who taught me that was the only way to be one
Happy Mother’s Day to the person who made me scared of accomplishing my dreams
To the one who helped me endure years of abuse and neglect as a mask for love
To the one who taught me that I could never be truly happy
Happy Mother's Day to the person who polluted the word mother for me
To the person who made me dread being a mother myself
To the person that I'm horrified of emulating and ******* other child's life up
Happy Mother's Day to my mom
May 10, 2020
May 10, 2020 at 10:11 PM UTC
Your pain and disappointment
should never be a hindrance
from accomplishing the plan
and purpose God has for you.
Isn’t our Life… a sacrament,
meant to be divinely poured
out, to honor our Creator?
As His children, we receive
His instruction and veracity,
as we carry our holy sword
and Hope that keeps us humble.
Discern the contrast to pain
and disappointment; find God’s
Joy, Mercy and His acceptance
without the need… to grumble.
Jan 8, 2017
Jan 8, 2017 at 1:17 AM UTC
Five hours left
in today's workday.
Five hours,
and I simultaneously
don't think I can make it,
but also know I have to.
Five hours is so little,
such a small amount of time.
So I'll watch the clock,
witness the dwindling.
I know I'll be fine,
after all,
it's just five hours.
Plus I'm off tomorrow,
and I have grand plans
for a day of wallowing
in bed, my mind set
on accomplishing
absolutely nothing.
Hurry up, seven o'clock.
Four and a half hours now.
Jul 25, 2014
Jul 25, 2014 at 6:34 PM UTC
A seemingly delicate flower with a broken appearance
who's strong underneath with a will to keep fighting.
A friend to few
but a lover of words,
a lover of delicate arts
that has beauty not seen by all.
Feelings of confusion followed by sorrow
cradled in the arms of suicidal thoughts.
Caught in the web of social anxiety leads to the basis of
irreversible agoraphobia.
The fear of rejection and shame caused by someone
no other than the person I see when I look in the mirror.
Accomplished the skill of taking my feelings and harnessing them,
saving them for what I love most,
The spot light.
Accomplishing and overcoming the desire to hide from the world
But overpowering it and turning it into an art.
If only I could understand what its like within the mind,
Of someone I love
To be seen through their eyes,
As what I am to the rest of the world.
If a being such as God does exist,
may he take a moment to stop the hate,
and show love through his followers
to the ones that may be oppressed
"In the name of God"
I am a prisoner of my own mind.
Love
Jun 19, 2014
Jun 19, 2014 at 1:44 PM UTC
There is a time in a person's life when that internal clock will ring
when a higher force will wake us from our slumber with a sting
having been given individual trials, we hope we'll do our best
but we are insensitive, overcome with laziness, a desire for rest
The little things in life, how so often we take them for granted
quickly losing touch with reality, and becoming disenchanted
thinking we can forge relationships, with the blinking of an eye
failing to feel the hurt we cause others, with our final good-bye
We, as human beings, must first come to acknowledge the truth
the problems we all hide in our closet, they started in our youth
but the error of our thinking, is clear and can only be addressed
when we're willing to accept the fact, that this life is only a test
Attempts at self denial are truly futile, because you remain unchanged
accomplishing nothing, only from yourself will you become estranged
an endless light of healing must be released, to that location unknown
thereby removing that which blocks our thinking, our heart of stone
Your mind is your cage, only if you desire, you can set yourself free
don't believe in the lies you're told, you can be what you want to be
if you never give up, you alone will be able to preserve the true way
by choosing your destiny, no one else will, because this is your day
Liberate yourself from the enslavement, transitory passions of the day
either stand up to the pressures, or you'll just find yourself blown away
you must trust your heart as it knows the truth, and it alone will succeed
choosing the only real path, that path from where the light shall proceed
Jul 28, 2015
Jul 28, 2015 at 4:21 PM UTC
i want to write
but the words aren't coming
i'm feeling trapped
by my mind's inability
to translate my emotions
to letters with meaning
i write to understand
why i feel the way i do
i am the doctor
of my own thoughts
but if i cannot write
then i cannot understand
& if i cannot understand
then i cannot diagnose
so here i sit
with the same confusion
i began with
some words written before me
as useless as they come
accomplishing nothing
begging for everything
Feb 21, 2019
Feb 21, 2019 at 10:39 AM UTC
They tell me I can do anything.
Looking down the throat of a challenge.
Hanging on to the coat tails of life by the fringe,
above a fire that is trying to singe...
...Who I am
My Identity
Targeted by
a self created entity.
To bring me down...
...Below my potential
to see what is essential
through consequential actions.
I AM A MAN!
no matter my wingspan... I CANNOT FLY!
And those childhood encouragements are a lie.
But through accomplishing what I am capable
I find that my boundaries are escapable.
I'm not shooting for the stars,
or looting and ending up behind bars,
but I am me, myself,
doing what I can so I'm not rotting on a shelf.
Jun 4, 2013
Jun 4, 2013 at 6:17 PM UTC
***1. Thou shall not worry, for worry is the most unproductive of all
human activities.
2. Thou shall not be fearful, for most of the things we fear never
come to pass.
3. Thou shall not cross bridges before you come to them, for no one
yet has succeeded in accomplishing this.
4. Thou shall face each problem as it comes. You can only handle
one at a time anyway.
5. Thou shall not take problems to bed with you, for they make very
poor bedfellows.
6. Thou shall not borrow other people’s problems. They can better
care for them than you can.
7. Thou shall not try to relive yesterday for good or ill, it is
forever gone. Concentrate on what is happening in your life and be
happy now!
8. Thou shall be a good listener, for only when you listen do you
hear ideas different from your own. It is hard to learn something
new when you are talking, and some people do know more than you do.
9. Thou shall not become “bogged down” by frustration, for 90% of
it is rooted in self-pity and will only interfere with positive
action.
10. Thou shall count thy blessings, never overlooking the small
ones, for a lot of small blessings add up to a big one.***
Jan 4, 2013
Jan 4, 2013 at 11:27 AM UTC
You're not going to let it win
You are not going to let it destroy you
You are going to find control
You're going to accomplish what you plan
It's going to be left as a ship wreck
And be compared to your successes
You are going to do this
You are going to get through this
I'm not going to let it win
I am not going to let it destroy me
I am going to find control
I'm going to accomplish what I plan
It's going to be left as a ship wreck
And be compared to my successes
I am going to do this
I am going to get through this
I'm not going to let MDD win
I am not going to let MDD destroy me
I am going to take its control
I'm not going to let MDD stop me from accomplishing what I have planned
My MDD is going to be left as a ship wreck
And be compared to my achieved successes
I am going to do this and beat MDD
I am going to get through MDD's disturbances
And I will not let it prevent me from living
I suffer from Maladaptive Daydreaming Disorder
It pushes me around
Kills my hopes and dreams
And contributes to my wish of never being born
But maybe I can try
If I put my head into a good perspective
To gain the control
Back into my life
Why should we have to suffer?
Nov 18, 2015
Nov 18, 2015 at 12:13 PM UTC
You have always found a way
to inflate yourself,
a thunderhead of you
a rainer upon parades
keeping your own side dry.
Praise your portolio,
record yourself accomplishing that,
but wait, there’s more of you
the lost boy
dressed as a hero.
The prison of ego comes first,
then the crippling psychic wounds
and the inevitable chaos
that just ****** you off
because there is just too much to manage
and you cannot do it alone
but you don’t dare tell anyone
so you fake it
and you don’t make it
and one day
while you are too busy
refusing to be grateful
for the awesome mystery of your own chi
a tagger defaces your BMW
in the parking lot of Whole Foods
and you weep into your tofu.
Apr 15, 2013
Apr 15, 2013 at 7:28 AM UTC
Its not always easy to be patient,
I know
They tell you it gets better
But they don't tell you when
Its not always easy to wake up,
I know
You keep doing it anyways, but sometimes your bed feels like quicksand and you just barely make it out.
Some days, you don't make it out,
I know.
Some days you sink so deep into your sorrows that suddenly you're drowning in an ocean of hopelessness and your bed is the only place safe enough to land.
It's exhausting some days,
I know.
You go to work and you put on a smile even though everything inside you is falling apart, and they don't see,
I know.
You wonder how much longer you can keep pretending things are fine
But they keep saying that things get better
And you want to believe them,
I know
You want to find your way back to the surface, that is a life you're not just surviving, but actually living
I know
I know you want to get better. And I know right now you are struggling and I know that on the days where the only thing you accomplished was simply breathing, you feel like a failure, but hunny you are the exact opposite of that.
You are a fighter.
You are a survivor.
You are braver than anyone will ever know, surviving constant battles clawing at your mind every second of every day.
This does not make you weak my love.
This makes you strong.
I know people keep saying that things get better,
But they never tell you when.
You just have to take it one step at a time.
Pride yourself on accomplishing the little things that don't seem important in the grand scheme of things, but they are the things that are keeping you alive.
One step at a time my love,
One breath, one hour, one morning, one shopping trip, one shower, one day.
Some day, I promise you
All of these little things will eventually lead you back to the light.
Back to being hopeful for tomorrow's.
I know,
Dec 11, 2020
Dec 11, 2020 at 4:15 PM UTC
It's 3:09 PM, I've just deactivated my facebook account. Not planned, or thought-out...just so. I know, it's a foolish and stupid thing to even take the time of noting down in words but so it goes. I'm not horrible, I've been worse. I'm just not...doing too good. I don't feel well, and quite frankly I'm too exhausted for the whole staying positive ******** Things like deactivating my lame facebook account and not owning a cell-phone by free-will...it's my way of modernly disconnecting from the artificial world I've held part of and the people in it. It's not that I'm trying to isolate myself or become anti-social completely...it's more like...I'm just trying to find some air, some real ******* fresh air to breath. I've been listening to Man Of A Thousand Faces by Regina Spektor on repeat this past week, and I just need...I just need to let my own self be. I'm at a distant public library away from home as I type this. It's one of my favorite places to visit and spend some quality free time at. Surrounding myself with books and records and strangers is one of the most tranquilizing methods I know. It's difficult sometimes...to accept that I'm twenty years old and in far reach of accomplishing my dreams. It's difficult to accept that my father's heart could fail again...it's difficult to accept that my mum has vertigo...it's difficult to accept that my uncle is dead, it's going to be a year since and I still cannot bring myself out of selfish denial. Loving is difficult, caring is difficult, trying is difficult, beliefs are difficult, feelings are difficult, I am difficult...and the thought of wanting to cry makes me want to cry because it's so exasperating and draining and overwhelming and humbling. I haven't written or posted much on here lately, but doing so right now gives me this tiny and odd and inexplicable crumb of...hope? It's difficult to accept death as much as life itself sometimes but nevertheless I accept it. I cope through it in the stupid little ways that I can. I become torn and furiously passionate all at once. I can only love as much as my heart can manage and work hard and try hard and cry when I feel like ******* crying because feelings are beautiful and meant to be exposed.
todo en él es lugar adecuado .
Jul 7, 2013
Jul 7, 2013 at 10:50 PM UTC
*Sheer energy flows within every drop of my lifeblood
Absorbed into my waking essence
Meshed with an intense passion to survive the floods
Crashing against all my defenses
I am washed in an incandescent rush of strength
Empowered by incantations
True survival is my goal in countless lengths
Overcoming all heated altercations
Abundant vitality brushes each fiber of my lion’s share
Continuing always, despite ill reasons
Zealously springing forth anew from danger’s air
Regardless of unusual seasons
I run with high-spirited air underneath my feet
Accomplishing all that I choose
Yet still holding a spirit within my chest so sweet
With feelings which can still be bruised*
Sep 21, 2010
Sep 21, 2010 at 7:47 AM UTC
With a pocketful of medicine,
And an optimistic air,
I set out to cure the world.
I had no idea, when I first set out,
Just how far my journey would take me.
I had dreams of dragons,
Heroic battles, and the vast expanse
Of the seemingly endless sea
Racing through my mind.
My friends, not knowing the true
Reason for my adventurous ways,
At first tried to discourage me;
Convincing me that to help myself;
To put myself above all others,
Would be, if not nobler,
Then at least more sensible.
Ah! My friends! Did you not realise,
That you were just encouraging
My foolish deeds more so?
For me, true happiness lies
In the smiles of others, and
The joys I inspire.
I find no pride in accomplishing
Deeds that fulfill other needs;
Diplomas and job offers
Sail over my head, and I
Pay them no heed.
Such accomplishments should be
Left (in my opinion), to kings,
And emperors, and others
Who I pay little regard to,
Who find such happiness
At receiving a scrap of paper
With not a jot of poetry on it.
I remain of the servile class.
By my own admission and actions,
I shun those who would have me
Believe that my past life,
The one in which I ruled,
If not the world, than at least
The part of it I so ignorantly knew,
Was a happier one.
So far there have been no dragons,
Save for the ones I carry with me
In my imagination,
The heroic battles I fought
Have been with no-one but myself,
In the recesses of my mind,
And the vastness of the ocean,
Carries itself, past the distant shore,
And into the hearts of those I love.
As I reach into my pocket,
I find the goods I carry to be
No more than sugar pills-
A placebo of the mind, that
I am told is good for nothing
By learned physicians, who know
Far more on the subject than I.
Thus I find myself in this foreign land,
With nothing but my optimistic air
To see me through.
I wish no more than to lend my hand,
And show others that I care.
Tell me; Is that a placebo too?
May 18, 2016
May 18, 2016 at 9:13 AM UTC
Hey, hey you.
Yeah, you kid.
Want some crack?
Why not? You don't do drugs?
Think you're too cool? Too rugged?
Let me tell you kid, drugs are devine.
Even better than christmas eve, vintage wine.
Smoke some *** you wouldn't notice if you were shot.
Drink some bourbon, whiskey, a few shots of *****
The poison is so good, you'd ask the bartender to top ya.
Sniff some coke, ****** you must inject.
**** gets you so trippy, you cannot reject.
Pop some acid, crush some ****
You'll be immortal, there will be no death.
Sniff some glue, Inhale some petrol.
You won't be addicted. Everything's under control.
The rush, the high.
It'll be amazing, it'll help you bare life, son.
The speed, the hush.
It'll make you feel sly, son.
The kid, innocent of puberty said,
But sir, that's what accomplishing my dreams, feels like.
Jul 2, 2014
Jul 2, 2014 at 9:33 AM UTC
i like everything about you just the way you are as you are when i met you. point blank.
i don’t have any preconception of who you feel you once were but aren’t now, that you wish you still were. that person doesn’t exist in my mind. the past doesn’t settle into my conscious. it’s just faint musings of something that doesn’t seem real or tangible to reality.
the person you currently loathe, i adore. the person you pine after, i feel nothing for other than what i feel about you now, because i don’t see him and you as separate or different selves the way you do. you are you. no matter what you perceive yourself as being, you are yourself perfectly.
and yet at the same time actually, i see you as very separate internally, with the work you’ve been doing, even if you don’t totally see that yet, because i know if him and i met when he existed in that state of mind we have both previously occupied in loneliness, neither of us would have been able to make sense of the other the way we can now. we both would have been too lost.
if that makes any sense. self vs internal self. treading water vs being swallowed alive. together vs loneliness. you vs a shell of who you are now.
it’s such a complicated balancing act but i wouldn’t have it any other way. when we backslide we are betraying no one but ourselves, even when it feels like we’re accomplishing and internalizing something greater than ourselves. we’re emptying our lives with our bodies, and it’s not fair to the selves we’re struggling to keep intact now for us to do that. we have things to live for. you have things to live for.
i like you now, not then. even if you see things flipped around. i don’t see any see-saw or scale that tips or drops to equal self-acceptance, nowadays with this disorder, i just see an hourglass. i know. i know it’s not that simple. but you’re the only one who sees value in what was. the people who love you now don’t see that, only how it has hurt and tortured you for far too long, and how much the person you are right now deserves to be free of it.
Feb 20, 2014
Feb 20, 2014 at 4:05 AM UTC
Aching, alone in the moonlight
My hurtful thoughts burn just as bright.
I drift numb through waves of sorrow,
The desire to be weightless lures me further below.
It's the calm before the storm of hunger
Yet I continue to starve, my stomach protests like thunder.
Fading in and out, I'm drowning no doubt.
Floating above me are skeleton bones and thin torsos
I idolize them, while my self hatred grows.
My lungs fill with salty tears, making me bloated, accomplishing my fears.
I'm ravenous
I don't care
I say, "I'm not hungry, really, I swear!"
Standing naked and ashamed in front of the mirror.
"You look disgusting!" A nasty voice sneers.
Recovery is far, for I still utterly agree.
I'm a horrifying atrocity, don't let anybody see.
As I drift forlorn to the open abyss
I beg, just wanting self worth and bliss.
The violent waves subside,
Making me realize it's okay now if I die
But I'll say it one more time: "I'm fine."
May 22, 2020
May 22, 2020 at 2:54 AM UTC
Self appreciation-
Poetry is like the soul
The soul being a bird
A Bird singing in it’s field,
Carrying it’s wounded heart
Across a bare land of hope
In search of it’s dreams.
As a blind man,
can hear every note from the bird precisely and accurately.
A deaf man can see all her beautiful vivid colors in her feathers.
Trying to build strength along they way Not to lose faith On each of their hardened journey.
Facing the reality of each their own dreams truth, One on one.
Taking the time,
Looking in their minds mirror,
Giving thanks to their soul’s For the life it has given to them.
Thanking their life for Building a complete fulfilling memory Of accomplishing the greatest of ones deepest sincerities in goals.
-Pure Inner Strength
Nov 19, 2014
Nov 19, 2014 at 7:30 AM UTC
like benny profane
@ the sailors' grave
boot heels etch
Hieroglyphic cuneiform
on saw dusted floors,
while blobs of mercury
nailed to the bar
drip
down
nauseatingly poetic
accomplishing nothing
proving even less.
Oct 12, 2013
Oct 12, 2013 at 5:37 PM UTC
I climbed up the mountain
And laughed at those
Who were not as strong as me
And felt sorry for the boy
With braces on his legs
That I passed on the way up.
I climbed down the mountain
And rejoiced in myself
For accomplishing something
That was easy to do
Until I met the sam boy
Who could not go any further.
We climbed down the mountain together
Using my legs and his strength
As I carried him down
He told me about his accomplishments
And I rejoiced in him
And felt sorry for myself.
Nov 30, 2010
Nov 30, 2010 at 9:12 AM UTC
Happiness is the sun shining brightly
on a cold spring day.
It's an Olaf that sings
while skipping away.
It's a child's squeal of delight
when being tickled by their mother.
Happiness is accomplishing a hard task
and receiving a reward like no other.
It's the laughter of close friends
with one person who made a joke.
Happiness is getting a question right
even though no one spoke.
Happiness exists everywhere
especially when most needed.
Many people don't think it
but happiness can be repeated.
I wish everyone could be happy
especially when they're most down.
Less muscles are used to smile
than to make a frown.
Apr 2, 2014
Apr 2, 2014 at 12:06 PM UTC