I'm scared of being a disappointment.
I'm scared of being vulnerable.
I'm scared of what people really think of me.
I'm scared of breaking your heart.
I'm scared of not being enough.
I'm scared of saying "I love you."
I'm scared of being complimented.
I'm scared of people smelling my breath when I don't brush my teeth.
I'm scared of using public toilets.
I'm scared of what parents say about me.
I'm scared of what teachers say about me.
I'm scared of the truth.
I'm scared of not having friends.
I'm scared of breaking the rules.
I'm scared of acting.
I'm scared of having regrets.
I'm scared of my past affecting my future.
I'm scared I'm not worth the trouble.
I'm scared of choking on a necklace in my sleep.
I'm scared of communicating deeply about my feelings with others.
I'm scared of doing something wrong.
I'm scared of not going to a good college.
I'm scared of talking about religion.
I'm scared of talking about money.
I'm scared of causing anyone unneeded grief.

But, I'm brave too.

I don't see you
You don't see me
We are the same person
In different bodies
Yet we look through
The same eyes
And choose to see
The same things
Exact to a point
Likes and dislikes
The easy stuff is true
Decisions are different
But for me
Or for you?
Which one makes
The right ones?
Which one does
The wrong?
Do decisions divide us?
Are we not each other?
Spitting image
Identical
That's what it's supposed to be
But in alternate worlds
How similar can we be?

Am I really as beautiful
As you tell me I am?
That it is a sincere hand
Who wipes away my broken tears?
It's hard to believe in love
When so called truths
Burn so easily to unforgiving lies
After all my painfully long years
To trust again
Brings memories I cannot face
Battles I have lost
And decisions that can't be erased
So why do you try?
Firing your measly arrows
And scaling my infinite walls
Can't you see there's nothing left to love?

When I see your eyes, I want to cry
The second you said it, a part of your beauty died
Never will I see you, the way you looked before
Baby, you ain't beautiful anymore

There's not enough room
to tell you how I feel
There's not enough emotions
Left for you to steal
There's not enough stories
That could make you a better man
There's not enough that
You can understand
There's not enough heartbreak
To kneel over in tears
There's not enough forgiveness
That can ease all those years
There's not enough love
For me to try to repair
There's not enough left
For a friendship to be there

The razor trembles in my hand
Empty walls can't help but stare
At the soul who will eventually
Lie cold and bare

For I couldn't remember
When there was a light
Everywhere I looked
Was darkness and fright

So I pull the blade closer
Uttering one last goodbye
God, why did I have to be so ugly
When I cried?

And as I watch the sink go red
Life oozing out of me in crimson threads
A thought still lingers in the air
When I'm gone, will anyone care?