Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Jun 2011 · 575
the binge
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
relapse disguised
as everyday life

we don’t know what we’re doing
mainly because it doesn’t feel like
we’re doing anything at all

the guilt is
unnatural

strangely,
enough.
Jun 2011 · 639
isometric
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
the key to
understanding people
is realizing that
you can only
understand
a person
Jun 2011 · 576
colors
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
black, white,
red, and blood

the restless and helpless are
the same

black, white,
red and blood

music is the cries
of those too brave to
be quiet but too
smart to say
it outright
Jun 2011 · 742
title
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
I am a stranger
in a strange
land

When asked the time
of day I give numbers
instead of letters

The blank stares
of others
offers no comfort
or help

In a city of well-kept glass,
on roads they’d have you
think were gold, there are
men and women and children
living lives they’d call
“happy”

with a strange feeling
of aloneness,
I cut swath across their
ranks, asking each man
and women and
child:

“what do you mean
you’re happy?”

from the glazed over eyes,
to the obvious lies,
to the corruption and
hatred and greed

above all things I’ve seen
between all things I need
below me I see a great depth

where are the reporters?
the conspirators? the
malcontents? where are
the watchdogs we call
nary-do-wells? or their
brothers the minor
senators? what happened
to religion? and faith
and belief? what happened
to god and to justice?
why are the front doors
closed and the back
doors open? why do
we not look into our
eyes? what happened
to us? all of us? every
one? where have I been
and now gone?

my restless eyes,
quite hypnotized,
cannot comprehend
or think of the
truth

that this land that I’m in,
this one stranger than fiction,
is in fact, my own, and no
other
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
I am your shining windows
I am your tall, brick walls
I am your rail-ways and
train engines
I am your conveyer belts
I am your stock parts
I am your young line boys
I am your cigar-smoking,
fat-cat bosses
I am your Ford automobiles
and Technicolor TV’s
I am your idea of
perfection

I am your broken windows
I am your toppling, mortar walls
I am your rusted rail-ways and
broken-down locomotives
I am your robotic arms
I am your lead paint
I am your Chinese labor
I am your *******-sniffing,
thrid-world-oppressing bossess,
I am your Toyota cars
and LG televisions,
I am your idea of
perfection

I am the old and the new
I am the sights that roll past
my rolled-up windows
I am the city and the suburbs
I am the quietly dying
I am the voiceless mind and
its cries for help
I am the future and
the past
I am the dream
I am the death of
the dream
I am your idea of perfection
and also,
your nightmare
of an
idea
Jun 2011 · 858
The World, Alive.
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
music and family
do little
to comfort me
now

the sad inevitability
is that my life is getting
****** over for no
reason

welcome to the reality
of reality

I look at the band-aids,
to holes in my skin, the
look of my eyes and all
seems no different

but things are different,
things are dying and changing
and falling apart as all
things do

(welcome to the reality
of reality)

I see the entire world flying past
at seventy miles per hour or more
and they all seem so happy

so perfect

I’ve never known that
perfection

even better off,
even smart,
wiser,
richer,
older,
younger

I’ve never known that
bliss

welcome to the reality
of reality


it’s hard to face
a fate that lives in your
house and eats the
same cereal

hell,
I don’t remember
the last time we
talked

time has come to do it
though

(and I’m ******)

it’s not anger,
not shame,
or hatred,
or cries of
unfairness

it’s just the mere fact
of knowing that I have
to

welcome to the reality
of reality

then I see that I’m alone,
typing to cold machine in
a cold, voluminous space

what have I done to be offended?

outside the trees grow,
the birds fly, the kids
play, the adults drink,
the addicts smoke, the
teachers teach, the eggs
hatch, the new lives live,
and the old ones die

in here
I am left to rot
until the sands of time
themselves
have washed away
into the
mist

the world is alive with living,
the human race does not know
my name,
quietly the world spins in space
quietly she stands out amongst
the black

welcome to the reality
of reality
Jun 2011 · 431
untitled
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
it is not
impossible to put
a price on human
life
but I still doubt
we’ll ever
really
do
it
Jun 2011 · 588
simple terms
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
life
is but a
slow boat,
silently
sailing on
a silent
sea

the only thing to do
is to smell the salt air
and learn to enjoy
the clouds
Jun 2011 · 498
small rant
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
nobody’s got
“pasts”
or
“secrets”
or
“deep, dark
hidden
lies”

they’ve just got
themselves
and
how much
they choose to
tell the world
about

the irony is that
the most mature (and
the least mature)
thing to do
is to say nothing
and let that
be
Jun 2011 · 618
the calm, black darkness
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
red flashes
to
green
and the pedal
sinks into
the
floor

quiet, soothing
jazz seeps out of my
speakers

speed goes to 10
then 20
then 40
then levels out
at an even
50

(5 miles over the speed limit)

my head is filled
with everything but
the task at hand

the DJ on the radio
apologizes for a mess-
up in the music

(we now return to
over the rainbow)

my mind is like
the road ahead

dark, lightless,
but there

it is borne of truth
and the future
but tainted by
the path
itself

(I almost have a head-on
collision as I try to make
a left turn on a green)

I get to the gas station
with my heart pumping

I see the lights inside,
the soda, magazines,
candy, cigarettes, and
day-old donuts

I quietly get out
and walk to the door
get an ice cream
and go back
to my
car

I take a deep breath
and ignite the engine
Jun 2011 · 850
America
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
We are a people that only children love
Men and women proud of themselves
But when asked, cannot tell you why they
Should be

Ideology replaces morality
Sin becomes greater than overcoming
It
Never forget we are the sons and daughters
Of immigrants too

We quietly grew strong
Munching on fallow fields and iron-hard
Men
Our adolescence ended in war
But our virtue is still fading like those
Battles were justified

Like so many others,
We did not realize how great we were

Too late did we think, oh,
We are not entitled, simply
Lucky

We have yet to realize this

Never did we think god was not one of
Us

Just as we dream we live
Caught in high clouds and strung out
On past success
We are a people only children could
Love

and simply put,
they do
Jun 2011 · 545
the great afterwards
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
there are still drops falling from the trees
still gray clouds in the sky
still small birds and bugs crawling form beneath their holes
still angry thoughts in our heads

there are still people waiting for savior
still men thinking women hold the answer
still books left unread
still meaning yet unfound
Jun 2011 · 1.2k
Aqua
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
I open the door to let the cool wet air in
outside is raining with angry summer rain
after many days of heat and sun and work
this welling up and bursting is like myself

let us not forget I am a man full of confidence
I have been infected, as so many young men do,
by the itch to run and jump and be a young man
to live as if I cannot live without running free
and to forget death as a trivial and minor matter

the trees thirst for water and the ground shakes
thunder is no worse than my own realizations

it is easy to forget what you cannot do
the biggest obstacles lack definition
they exist in the realm of wordless voids
where feeling is expressed in feeling
and the blade of the finite is outlawed

I ache for and dream of soaring
but understand my lack of wings

the rain is pitter-patter on my porch
whilst my mind plays the bass drum

it is a simple existence that I live, no?

the water quiets now
my phone rings
it’s her

that makes me happy
knowing it’s still her

knowing she still loves me
still reaches out for me
still thinks about me in the twilight hours
still wants to talk and to ask questions
still feels the need to call

the cool air seeps into my room and my muscles ache
I do not wonder why they do and thus calm my mind
the night seems good tonight, what shall it hold for us?
Jun 2011 · 757
Rubik's cube
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
it’s just hit me
that middle school
was the last
time I was really part
of the “main
crowd”

now I run in completely
different circles

different people,
different lives,
different activities

guess I decided I wasn’t
going to put up with the
****

but then I thought a bit more:

running in circles

who does that?

crazy people for one

and then I was quiet
with that realization
Jun 2011 · 549
12:08
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
everything hurts
everything

it feels good

maybe I’ll sleep well
tonight
Jun 2011 · 864
night hound blues
Overwhelmed Jun 2011
shadows are doors
to another realm

creatures look
in from them
their eyes
tainted with
desires
and
they plot for how
they will enter
our houses
and replace us
as we
slumber

these apparitions,
translucent except for their
perfectly formed eye slits,
cannot remember
their last sleep-filled
night

(they were once you,
you must understand)

they are the over-stressed,
the over-achieving,
the well-known,
the famous

they are our heroes,
our role models,
our kings
and
fathers

they are the ones
we look up to

(and despise)

those we want to be
those we can’t admit to liking
those we take for granted and
ignore
those we call names and
bully constantly
those we cannot face alone but
who we sneer at in groups

the nerds,
the geeks,
the leaders,
the counselors,
the presidents,
the cops,
the valedictorians

we hate them
for we are not
them

the trend of our lives hurts
the deeper with dig down

but we would not dare let them take us

let them come through their doors,
take our covers and beds,
sleep, eat, *****,
let them have our lives in exchange for theirs

we would never do that

we know better

we light up our drugs,
**** in jars because the bars
don’t let us in anymore,
eat from garbage cans,
date ****** and pay pimps,
**** our brothers just to buy
*******

it’s the life for us you see

to **** up and
not give a ****

and it’s good

so the shadow doors can slam themselves
and the blood shot eyes can close shut

we’re going to bed alone tonight
and that’s perfectly fine with us
Overwhelmed May 2011
silence
is such a perfect
torture

not quiet of others,
you see,
but of myself

to be able to hear,
to think,
to know

but be unable to answer,
to teach,
to speak

silence is such
a perfect torture,
for me,
the loud and
boisterous
one

to be trapped inside
my very own lips

to be filled with words
but be denied the voice

this is a
greater punishment
than any
prison

I suppose this is why
poesy is so important

it is my voice,
on the page

it is the monologue,
that I attempt to make
dialogue

it is who I am
and my way of
telling you
that

this silence
is such perfect torture
for me

it eats at me
without taking
any bites

it causes pain,
only because I
try to fight it

silence
is such a perfect
torture
for those who
exist
in their
words

and this silence,
could drive me to insanity,
forever left alone
with myself
Overwhelmed May 2011
he rises out of cold sands
stone eyes give way to stone
faces
his teeth are rare jewels
yet lack value
or
desire

he disturbs the dunes

silently

he tears cacti
from the ground
by their
roots

he lets
scorpions
hide in
his grainy
skin

his music
is the chirping
of dying
insects

his movements sound
like the evening wind

he travels to the rock pillar
in the desert somewhere,
seeking his answers like a
dog to his home

for years he travels,
shifting through the
sands,
and the desert grows
upon as if he never moved
in the first
place

he will find the place he seeks,
one day,
and he will talk with
snakes about things
snakes do not know
about

his rough lips will quiver
his hard eyes will well
his soft mind will bend
his old hands will clench

he will talk religion
with souls full of
deception
and
make decisions
on the advice of committed
liars

he will go from that place,
head full of answers,
and wander through the sands
until he wears away

and where he finally rests
his mighty shoulders
for the last time
there will stand a simple mark
to say he had once existed
and that he never once
suspected his
murderers
May 2011 · 1.1k
what we don't want to face
Overwhelmed May 2011
imagine if they hadn’t
found the dog

imagine if I had to console
her with all my
might

imagine if
our one summer together
was forever tainted by
this

imagined if tears
was all I would
remember

imagine if god was
cruel

imagine if god was
real

imagine if my arms
could heal and my hands
could soothe

imagine if happiness
could spread like a virus

imagine if her eyes
never knew what tears
were

imagine if the storm had
gotten him

imagine if the body
turned up in some gutter
by some stranger

imagine if I had to help
her through that

imagine if she couldn’t leave me,
for fear of facing facts

imagined if I couldn’t look her in the eye,
for fear that she’d she I’m powerless

imagine if they hadn’t found the dog

imagine if I didn’t get to see
the change in her face

imagine if she hadn’t hugged
me with all her might

imagine if shouldn’t hadn’t kissed me
like she actually wanted to

imagine if none of this had
happened,
that in the midst of this storm
all we had left was our
imagination
May 2011 · 654
Vergebung
Overwhelmed May 2011
der
nachte Himmel
akzeptiert
mich

ich
akzeptiere
mich

für einmal
Forgiveness

the
night sky
accepts
me

I
accept
me

for once
May 2011 · 1.0k
the conscious
Overwhelmed May 2011
he is the
worst person
you have
ever
met

he is constantly
judging

always
making snide
remarks

always telling you
that you can be doing
better

when he talks
there is
always a sense
of acknowledged
arrogance

his steps are loud
like the rest of him

he always seems to be around.
especially when you don’t want
him to be

he knows when
one more sly remark
will do you in

(and then makes
one)

he trashes your house at parties
he eats out your fridge clean
he seduces your girlfriend and
beguiles your wife and he always
seems to be preferred by your
friends

you can’t shake him
you can’t hide from him

he knows where you are
and you know that too

he doesn’t need shadows
when you’re as paranoid
as you are

he can be in the room
and yet somehow
be hiding from you

he laughs when you scream
at him for the millionth time

he smiles as you cry
or hold back crying

he climaxes when you beg
him to stop

he will never leave you

you are born with him
and will die with him

no-one else knows he’s there
but they always suspect there’s
someone bugging you

(they know people like him
too)

he doesn’t ever leave things too
messed up
and the worst part of it all
is that he’s right

always right
always always always
right

when he whispers that
you don’t love her

he’s right

when he shows you how stupid
you were acting

he’s right

when he dances ahead of you
because you can’t keep up

he’s right

and most of all he’s right
when he tells you it’s all
your fault

you can put your fists up
but that’s worth jack-****

he never needs to say a word
but he does anyways

(he always wins,
especially in fights)

he’ll ask you one day
what it’s like to be the
biggest **** up in the
world

you will suddenly hear
an empathic tone
in his voice
that most definitely
wasn’t there
before

what’s it like?
he asks again
and again
you hear that tremble,
that aching,
shaking,
terrible
confusion
that means he
really wants to
know

but why does he?

does he care?
does he not hate me?
does he… love
me?

he waits for your answer

“you’re not anybody,
are you?”

you’ll ask

no, he’ll say,
only what you
let me be

and from that day forth
he’ll only be a memory,
threatening to come back
if you ever let yourself
go (like you did) again
May 2011 · 875
midday shower
Overwhelmed May 2011
sometimes,
the best move
is to restart
even
if it’s in the
middle of
the biggest
moment
of
your
life

wash,
dress,
breath,
begin
(again)
May 2011 · 716
prophets
Overwhelmed May 2011
it doesn’t
feel like summer

it doesn’t seem
like I can relax

it doesn’t look
like I have much to
smile about

the breeze can’t help me
the sun can’t help me
I can’t help me

this is to
put it simply

I’ve messed up

despite all my confidence,
all my work,
all my trials and former
accomplishments…

I get nothing

life is not any nicer
to kings than peasants

there is something wrong
with my tonight

something wrong
with time and mind
and body

there isn’t any difference

the morning awaits
just like today’s
but it should wait like
something new
and fresh
and
healing


but it doesn’t

the pattern of my entire
life lays out before me
May 2011 · 767
the funeral
Overwhelmed May 2011
is
it
that
hard
to
accept
that
life
is
short
and
finite?
May 2011 · 1.1k
escapades
Overwhelmed May 2011
they carried guns
and bottles of beer and
boxes full of expensive
china and glass

their feet spilled
out in front of them
and their goods
out to the
sides

the sirens
whined somewhere
offstage
and
they were
lost in the
escape

these men would never
be more alive again
May 2011 · 1.1k
adios
Overwhelmed May 2011
at midnight,
as I take off my shoes,
my coat,
shirt, tie, vest,
socks and
pants,
I am caught in
the delirium
of
revolution

this revolution
takes place entirely
within me

my kidneys are
attacked in destructive
raids,
my knees knocked
and sweltered with
war,
my mind shot at
and frantically
mended,
my heart has
seen much better
days

it is an uprising against
myself

a war
to overturn
the old thinking
regime

outside of me,
I can feel the sting
of bullet and
blade

inside of me,
I can see the pain
of evolution and
change

I rest my weary head tonight
drunk on thoughts of an end
to all this

by the morning’s
cool touch
I will find myself
rid of such
thoughts

wondering only if
she’ll be there for me
when I call her twenty;
thirty; forty years
from now

I watch the night turn about me
and rest my eyes for the first time
Overwhelmed May 2011
it is undeniable realization
that the majority,
if not all but a small
percent,
of people are absolutely,
totally,
completely,
terrifyingly,
petrifyingly,
murderously,
suicidaly,
alone

this is the sad fate
of every human being
ever to be born upon
this earth

my father said it best,
almost exactly as I said it above
to be exact,
but it took hours of
talking, years of
living, centuries
of inherited wisdom
to finally understand
the oppressive truth
of what he
realized

there is no happiness in money,
no satisfaction in power or position,
*** lacks emotion and emotion lacks
reason and reason lacks the passion
that we need to get up in the
morning

we are born
we live
and
we die

alone

never forgot this

never make the mistake
of thinking that even one
micro-ounce of genuine
empathy is not worth
more than a thousand
golden kingdoms

the ability to truly
connect with someone
is the most valuable
resource in the
universe

we build societies on pillars
of loneliness, and justify it
with science and god

all we need to know
is that we can achieve
all we need in a single
conversation

it is unknowably guilt-inducing
to realize that most people can’t
have conversation at one in the
morning with their fathers

most don’t have fathers,
others don’t know they do,
and the rest lack the will
to break down the barriers
of age and pretentiousness

this undeniable aloneness is the
shadow of my ethereal nightmares

not for its effects on me,
but for its tyrannical
grip on the every day
people I cannot hope to
help
May 2011 · 727
V
Overwhelmed May 2011
V
she’s the one
who sits in the corner
at the big party,
phone in hand
anxious
tapping her fingers after
sending one message
and awaiting the
next,
she doesn’t look around
just down
at the carpet
till she is shocked by
the buzz of her cell
phone,
then she reads furiously,
types madly,
doesn’t even notice
you quietly observing her
from across the
room

she is the girl
who is so obsessed
with one specific person’s love
that she refuses
love from anywhere
else

she cuts her hair short,
studs herself with odd
earring, and says “I love
you” but never to anyone
she means it to

she does not eat
in an attempt to
punish her soul

she does not really know
what you say to her
only that
you make noise
and distract
her
from her next
text

she will destroy you
if you interrupt her

she is in control
but makes no
decisions

she sits,
in the corner,
hoping the next
check of her phone
contains all the
things she’s
been hoping
for

she is there,
alone,
slowly becoming part
of the
furniture
May 2011 · 2.1k
poem for the modern age
Overwhelmed May 2011
we drink soda like its alcohol
and pop pills like they’re candy

we eat fast food like its healthy
and pray to god like he’s good

we throw up in back-alley toilets
and **** our children in plain sight

we can’t remember bad times
and think of good ones lost

we learn from death and not dying
and examine till meaning is gone

we exist in an air of relentlessness
and read a compass lacking north
Overwhelmed May 2011
I
have
come
to
the
conclusion
that
all
anyone
ever
wants
to
do
is
to
be
tired,
go
to
bed,
smile
as
they
fall
asleep
and
then
wake
up
feeling
like
they
want
to
get
up

in
simple
terms
I
am
experiencing
one
of
these
rare
and
fleeting
moments

there’s
a
lot
that
could
be
attributed
to
the
why
or
the
because
but
I
think
the
best
thing
to
do
is
to
fo­***
on
experiencing
this
moment
rather
than
trying
to
figure
out
­how
to
do
it
again

goodnight

everyone

I
love
you

you
love
me
­
you
are
you

I
am
I

good
night
world

kiss
kiss
hug
hug
pat
pat

sigh
May 2011 · 1.2k
Teeth
Overwhelmed May 2011
She wore a knee-length skirt. I like them a tad shorter but for some reason this didn’t bug me. Her smile was bright and cheery. Her hair looked soft and came down to the top of her back. She was beautiful and her teeth were white and seemed to pop out of her mouth. I liked her a lot.
We decided we wanted Italian. I told her about Acario’s, a good-quality place up the street, and she said that it sounded fantastic. I opened the door for her and we drove away in my car. It wasn’t the nicest one on the market but it went fast. When we got out on the highway I pushed the accelerator to the floor and weaved between traffic. Some girls get nervous when I do this but she seemed to enjoy it. She looked over at me and grinned with those bright teeth. I don’t remember much except those teeth until we got there. I opened the door for her again and held the small of her back as we walked to the door.
There was some native Italians singing in the corner as we sat down. There was very electric light, only candles and occasional flicker as the kitchen doors swung open and shut. The waiter seemed a natural at his job. Sharp clothes, slicked back hair, good smile that didn’t seem full of contempt. He greeted us in Italian but quickly reverted back to a more common tongue when we began asking about their specials. She ordered Rigatoni a la pesto. I ordered Linguine a la Bolognese. We shared a semi-expensive Merlot that the waiter recommended. It was all very good but neither of us ate much. All I could focus on were her teeth. Their movement up and down when she talked. How badly it felt to see them go when she plucked a single piece of pasta into her mouth. We stayed for two hours. I paid the bill and left a generous tip. The waiter seemed grateful but I suspect he gathered this was our first date.
I did not want the evening to end so I asked her if she wanted to go someplace else. She suggested a park about a fifteen-to-twenty minute drive away. We both got into the car and I sped down the highway, looking over when I could to see the white gems she kept tucked behind her lips flare open as I revved the engine.
When we arrived she took my hand and led me to a lake a small ways away. We walked around the lake for a while until we found a bench. It was old and wooden. It had seen many people’s ***** and absorbed the sounds of children calling to their mothers, old women throwing seeds to the birds, and even the sounds of young lovers hungrily snarled in each other’s faces. She sat down quickly and smiled, looking at the quiet waters first and then into my eyes. Her eyes seemed full of life but I could not help to be drawn slightly lower, to the confines of her red rim.
I leaned in for a kiss but she didn’t lean back at first. I opened my eyes and saw her grinning, her teeth seeming to say, “you don’t think I’m that easy do you?”
“No”, I said in my mind, “no you’re not that easy. You know I want you. You know why I like you. Why I desire you. Fine. I’ll earn it. I’ll make you want it. Just come here. Come here once and I’ll win you over.”
I leaned in all the way and got my lips on hers. She didn’t kiss back. She wanted to see me try. She wanted me to impress her. I did everything I could. I moved my lips up and down. I ran my tongue on hers. I touched her teeth for the first time. It lit a fire in me. I fought harder than I ever had. I tried things I didn’t know could be tried. It felt like hours and I think it might’ve been hours but that one kiss was what did it.
When we separated she was still smirking. It was different this time though. She was satisfied, not disappointed. Approving, not taunting. She agreed. She was going to give me a shot.
We finished out the evening. I dropped her off at her house around 4 in the morning. We barely talked the rest of the night. We didn’t hold-hands. We didn’t kiss. I don’t even remember what we did for all that time, but it was wonderful. It was enough for me just to know those white, gleaming, wonderful teeth were mine.
That date led to another, the one after that to another one, that one to a fourth and so on and so forth. Weeks turned to months. Months to years. It was years and years and years it seemed to me. I couldn’t remember the days of the week, the hour, the month, the year. It was all about the next time I got to see those teeth. Until, one day, in the blink of an eye, it was the last time I got to see them again. The last time, the very time they warped to fangs and breathed fire like a dragon upon a now useless play-thing.
A short story, written in the style of Hemmingway (I do not assert I am any good at this).
May 2011 · 708
while she was missing
Overwhelmed May 2011
all this ****
from my past
started coming
up

so I thought
**** it
I’ll just get it over
with

so I got my dad’s gun
and thought,
ok,
if I haven’t done it in a week
then I guess I’ll just put it back
and go on with things

short of it is,
two days later my dad
noticed that his .45 caliber
hand-gun  was missing
and instead of ya’know,
talking to me,
ya’know,
like a normal person,
he called the
cop

I got escorted off campus
by officer Williams
I thought everybody saw me
but I guess not

I spent a week in a mental hospital
that was a load of bull-crap
they said I had to be there three days
then the lady wasn’t there till Monday
then Tuesday
then they said I would be home Wednesday
and now I’m obviously talking to you
and I’ve only been home like two hours
and it’s Wednesday evening
load of bull-crap

so anyways,
I’m on these new pills
supposed to help with depression
and anxiety and stuff

I even missed Bin Laden being killed
that ******

there’s a ban on newspapers
and books in there
but I got special permission
and got a paper

hehe,
so yeah,
**** those guys

I don’t know,
I had all these texts
from random people when
I got out

like really random
like Sujin even texted me

I don’t know,
I’ll be in tomorrow,
I expect hugs
I miss hugs,
nobody’s hugged me all
week

ya’know they didn’t let me have music either?
yeah, I missed music,
yeah, this week really
******
May 2011 · 1.0k
sie ist sie
Overwhelmed May 2011
sie regieret
uber deinem Geist

sie wohnt
in dein Herz

sie liebt
du

sie ist…
sie
A poem in German
May 2011 · 755
the warm stream
Overwhelmed May 2011
there’s a piece of
toilet paper
wedged in the toilet
hole

the music sounds
beautiful and sings
out my
speakers

dusk and dawn
are the same

there is black paper too

trumpets are the answer
to all the troubles in the
world

the internet is failing
and the system is corrupt

when we are not ourselves
but who we are connected to
we have ascended the
individual

the bottle is simple
yet perfect

the laugh is needed

sleep is an inevitability
reading a gateway drug
and family reads like an
autopsy report

the can, the sticker, the
empty pack, the deck of
cards, the plastic shades

there are empty glasses
and empty eyes

the mirror and the rock
are friends now

cough drops are a poison,
it’s written on the box.

keys to a car

doors that shut and lock
and can be opened if you
wiggle the ****

controllers control
nothing

eat your fate young child
the only solution is the fat

jokes in denial
humor in despair
tragedy is useless
comedy a joke

we say lines and
remember blocking
but the meaning is
lost somewhere in
the mist of person

you can hear the piano
but not the voice,
the telephone begs you
not to die

eat your fate,
speak your mind,
there’s a piece of
toilet paper stuck
in the toilet
hole

behind you
(and in front)
is everything,
nothing,
something,
everything,
something,
anything,
­
and

nothing
May 2011 · 922
the warm stream
Overwhelmed May 2011
there’s a piece of
toilet paper
wedged in the toilet
hole

the music sounds
beautiful and sings
out my
speakers

dusk and dawn
are the same

there is black paper too

trumpets are the answer
to all the troubles in the
world

the internet is failing
and the system is corrupt

when we are not ourselves
but who we are connected to
we have ascended the
individual

the bottle is simple
yet perfect

the laugh is needed

sleep is an inevitability
reading a gateway drug
and family reads like an
autopsy report

the can, the sticker, the
empty pack, the deck of
cards, the plastic shades

there are empty glasses
and empty eyes

the mirror and the rock
are friends now

cough drops are a poison,
it’s written on the box.

keys to a car

doors that shut and lock
and can be opened if you
wiggle the ****

controllers control
nothing

eat your fate young child
the only solution is the fat

jokes in denial
humor in despair
tragedy is useless
comedy a joke

we say lines and
remember blocking
but the meaning is
lost somewhere in
the mist of person

you can hear the piano
but not the voice,
the telephone begs you
not to die

eat your fate,
speak your mind,
there’s a piece of
toilet paper stuck
in the toilet
hole

behind you
(and in front)
is everything,
nothing,
something,
everything,
something,
anything,
­
and

nothing
May 2011 · 1.0k
and so justice was served
Overwhelmed May 2011
now that I’m old enough,
to see and recognize
important,
historical,
events
they just seem
to keep coming
and coming
and
coming

tonight,
Osama is dead

the boogey man
the terrorist patriarch
the killer
the mass-murderer
the second ******
the king of thieves
the bearded Beelzebub
the destroyer of worlds

the colossal nature of
this moment hits me like
a truck

it is a victory
it is a turning point
it is a momentous
event

I cannot fathom it

this is the start of a new era
a dawn of a new age

in this moment
I hope the world celebrates
but I warn you,
it’s not over

yet
May 2011 · 647
keeping it together
Overwhelmed May 2011
like a puzzle,
thrown
to the floor, there
are pieces
that flutter and
shatter away
attempting to free their
bonds and free them-
selves

like a vase,
thrown to the
floor,
there is no piece
left unbroken

like a book
off the shelf,
like an egg
to the ground,
like a brain
against the wall

there is only the
remains

in three, two, one
we brace for impact

there is no survival when victory
is measured in collateral damage
May 2011 · 556
illusions of structure
Overwhelmed May 2011
a house of
cards will fold
on themselves
in the lightest
of breezes
or the harshest
of storms
Apr 2011 · 581
at terms
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
there is a simple existence,
when there’s no
strife
and
no loathing,
when you’re not afraid
of the mirror
and willing to love
and to
fail

in simple terms,
I have reached this
existence

where I can laugh
about tragedy
and care about
pointless things

with love,
of myself
and
of another,
I have opened up
to a new a
life

a simpler life

this is my first day here
and the sunshine burns
through the storm clouds
above my shattered old
home
Apr 2011 · 749
crackle
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
out of nowhere,
the summer storm
sets in

there is blue
and there is
grey and there
is not rain
yet

a single thunderbolt,
that rings out for seconds,
minutes, hours, years,
cracks through the day-
time sky and demands
attention for what it
will not do
Apr 2011 · 960
pills (the death of christ)
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
the room is black
the sky is black
the night is black
the world is black
the future is black
the entirety of everything
is dark and dreary and
black

savior rests in a bottle,
a small red circular shape,
and it comes in hundreds
but numbers are not enough

I need a healer,
one that breaths
and thinks and
lives

I need to crucify my pride
and reach out to Roman
help

the black looms
and looks with
a smirk

how do I decide to
**** a part of me?

this decision, between
suicide and suicide,
rests one phone call
and terrible conversation
away

there is a bed
the bed is black
the bed is death
the bed is mine

the future is the kiss of judas
but the lips of his are my own

the solution does not rest
in a bottle or an exercise,
it exists in a man or women
who has no care for me
except that I am paying
him/her

my salvation is in swallowing
not any pill or medication,
but in nailing my arrogance
to a cross, swallowing it whole
as it may be, and walking past
their doors into a confessionary
between only me and they

I am caught in the moment
that will end part or all of
me
Apr 2011 · 925
living, not dying
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
to forget everything
bad that’s
happened is
a fool’s errand

I am not a fool
but I am an idiot

I bite off more than I chew,
spit it out,
and take another
gigantic
gulp

my head hurts
my body hurts
my mind hurts

with all the mistakes
and obviously bad
decisions

I am not discouraged

I am living
not dying
(I hope)

living,
not dying,
for the
moment

living, not dying,
with music in my
ears and songs in
my heart, so I pick
up the pen and be-
gin
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
never again
will there be
a chance like
this

so it’d be such
a shame to die
in this moment

but the prospect looms and
the future moves and about
tomorrow I can promise only
that there may be an answer
or, just as likely, there might
not
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
never again
will there be
a chance like
this

so it’d be such
a shame to die
in this moment

but the prospect looms and
the future moves and about
tomorrow I can promise only
that there may be an answer
or, just as likely, there might
not
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
unsure of living
I have discovered
the waiting room
of the nearly dead

there are pictures
of the famous ones
hung upon the wall

******, Hemmingway,
Hammurabi, Harrison

in their different times
they all sat in these chairs
reading magazines and
quaint biographies while
they waited for their name
to be called

the most unsettling thing
is not knowing if you truly
belong here

so sitting in death’s waiting room
I flip through greasy, old pages
wondering if I’m brave enough
to walk out the door and see if
anybody notices
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
for the smart,
you will persecuted

for the strong,
you will be put
to the test

for the passionate,
your commitment
will be tried

for the lucky,
you will have to
do without

for the hard times
are still to come

the past,
as gloomy as it
may seem,
does not compare
to the future

there will be times,
when being a loser
only means death

there will be times too,
when your children
are more of a parasite
and less of a human
being

and also there will be times,
when time is the only thing
we have left

for us,
the hardest trials
have yet to begin

the most difficult problems
have yet to arrive

the worst situations
have yet to pass

it will be thunderstorms,
and plagues, and theft,
and anarchy

the world will only know
******
and the execution
of it

and these times are still to come

the past has not
prepared us
for the future

the future where we will
fight when there is nothing
left to fight for

the future where we rise
from the ashes of war and
defeat and hatred

the future where we can
once again be human with
out being judged

the hardest times,
are still to come.

but the best times…

they are nearly in
reach.
Apr 2011 · 683
real murder
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
I heard about
this kid
the other
day

the one
who
got run over

I can’t remember
his name
and
on the news channels
they only
show
blaring ambulances
and
well-dressed
tv correspondents

as far as I know
there’s a funny-shaped
deer hiding under
the white blanket

I was I could remember
that kid’s name,
he was 17
or 15
or 12
or 5
or some
terrible age
like that

but all I can find out
is that another innocent
life has been lost
and that at 9
Friends will be airing
a re-run
Apr 2011 · 783
the darkness and the storm
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
the rain drops
hitting my sky light
are just about
as beautiful as
I have ever
seen

I can’t actually see them
but the sound of
them…

it’s peaceful

on this day,
of ups, downs,
and unfortunate
situations
I can use a bit
of calm like
this

even as the thunder
sings its angry
songs to the
night,
there is an island
in the storm
for the
calamity
that is
my
life

tonight,
I lock myself
away
with the darkness
and
the storm,
hoping there’s
a meaning,
or a
reason,
or a purpose
for
once
Apr 2011 · 1.2k
fluttering
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
failure is like a bird
fluttering in and out my
window
singing it’s chirpings
like they were
actual music

his wings are ugly
he has scars and
his feathers are unkempt

there is failure I say
as it flies away
again

it’s not exactly bad
to see him once in a
while but lately I’ve
been seeing him a
little too often for
comfort

but life is has its risks
and if you want to see
the sparrow of success

or

the bluebird of happiness

or even

the vultures
of determination

or

the eagles of
faith

you’ve got to put seed out for all of them

so as the bird of failure
flies away into the void
I spread sunflower seed
and fruit pits hoping that
someday I will see the red
bird of love
Apr 2011 · 920
on, in, with, the.
Overwhelmed Apr 2011
on the sidewalks of our childhood homes
in the eyes of our forgotten fathers
with clenched teeth and caught breath
the group gasps and stares at our appearance

on the doorsteps of a new generation
in the hearts of a nation and a world
with fiery purpose and composed attitude
the children and the elders walk alone

on the minds of all humanity
in the works of every artist
with despair and treachery at hand
the words of our mouth turn black

on the faces of a billion tiny ants
in their tiny feet marching together
with direction but no meaning
the queen feels no remorse

on the page but not the cover
in the text but not the surmise
with metaphor and simile
the realizations come too slow

on the ground
in the skies
with peacefulness and anger too
the world is all there is
Next page