One day, I told my father
"If I'm going to die now,
I don't want my death to be painful"
My father then answered me,
"How did you know that death is painful?
Have you experienced it already?"

No! It's all your fault
You're the one who put me in this situation
I was once a good boy
Obeying all your orders
Doing whatever it takes to be right
Giving all my efforts to be mere perfect
That's what you wanted
And I did all of that
Now that I failed
To pursue your dreams for me
Is it still my fault?
I've done my part
You're the one who did nothing
You're the one who shaped me into this
I have no such things to explain
For once I want to be who I really am
I regret that time when you gave birth to me
That you were assigned to be my parents
I regret that I let you rule me
I regret that I let you do all of these
I regret this feeling of forgiving you
I regret this feeling that I made a mistake
I regret that I regret everything that we used to have with
I regret to admit that I still love you no matter what

Touch by touch
Knees to knees
Sweat to sweat
Breath to breath
No one knows
No one cares
Who's it going to be
Next to you on chair
Different faces
Different lives
Merged into one circumstance
Through a Toki Ride

Look at you
Are you what you are?
Or you are what others want you to be?
Trapped in the amidst of expectations
Jailed with dishonesty in oneself
Slaved in the hands of your own destiny
How will you escape?
If the only key is to reveal who you are?
And that key is in your hand for a long time?
Would you still want to be a prison in your own body?
Or be the one whom you really want to be?
Whatever the answer, the key is in you anyways.

Life is unpredictable
It is not manifested on the wrinkles of the palm
Nor on the arrangements of stars

Life is not determined on the flash of cards
Not in the wishing well
Nor through a fortune teller

Life is not a story alone
It is a book
And we are the author

So whatever the pages will be
Depends on what we write
The ending is not for ours to indicate

Unstable breathing
Though nose is attached
In a tube with air
Connected to a tank

Trying to touch your face
Trying to utter a word
Grasping the strength I need
While my eyes force to close

In this bed for almost a month
You've been with me since then
I'm afraid of the aftermath
If I leave you alone here

I still remember how you tie my shoelace
How you fill the gaps between my fingers
How you bite your fingernails
Though you always have a nail cutter

I still can feel the depth of your kiss
The tenderness of your hug
The warmth of your breath
And the softness of your hand

I still can figure out your face
With your eyes so calm
With your dimples emphasized
And smile with charm

I'm not afraid to die
Yet I'm afraid I'll not finish
All the things.......

We always want what we don't have
And pay no attention on things we own
We don't want things that seems enough
And pray to have some more

Even when we got what we really need
We're always craving for something else
And we often lose what we posses
Seldom aware of it

When everything disappears in a blur
Then we blame other people
We don't realize that it's our fault
And we deserve to suffer

Happiness is not of possessing so much
It is not of craving for more
Coz in this world we only need 'enough'
And contentment in our soul