I scold myself repeatedly
Why didn't my heart consult my mind before falling for him?
Why did it bypass my logic?
How did I love so easily?
So quickly?
So strongly?
The strength I knew not until he examined my love
Toyed with it
Pushed the boundaries
Exhumed it
That he ripped open to study
Wondering all the while if I was worthy
He shook his head and passed back my love
No, its not what I thought
He said
No, its not what I want
He said
I blinked with disbelief and stared at what he had returned
He'd destroyed
Picked apart
No, I cried out as he turned to leave
Leaving me holding my heart which he'd massacred
This isn't what I gave you I stuttered
I offered my heart renewed by your essence
Plump, glowing and infinite
Full of love and hope
Of endless possibilities
You've given me back a wreck
A shell of what was
How was it still able to be be radiating such love?
Such intense raw adoration?
I pray for it to begin to lessen
I pray, I pray, I pray
Seemingly to no avail

Fickleness you are my foe
I used to find you sweet
A laughable, childish quality
Something I'd grow out of
But you've ruined me
I've loved so many
Only to lose interest
Fickleness you are my foe

Longing can be delicious
The build up that begins as soon as you part
Sits in your tummy
Warm and heavy
Its okay
It reminds you of him

I was sure
Sure of myself
Thought I was above clichés
Live to please someone?
Psh i'd think "it'd never come to that"
But then he was there
He'd been there a while
No stranger
A comfortable smile
I kid you not
It came to me like a slap in the face
This sudden urge? This unrivalled adoration?
It felt so out of place
Its the simple things
Your little gap between your teeth
The effortless and energising teasing
I began to see see parts of me within you
The quiet thoughtfulness
The smile you had for everyone
Always a thousand times more beautiful when directed at me

Only side by side with you do I realise my womanly worth.
You'd stroke my arm,  always happily surprised at how soft and smooth I am, almost immediately bringing it up to your lips.
You'd kiss, nibble and lick.
Once satisfied your fingertips had not been tricked you'd move to my lips.
2 gentle fingers would sweep across my bottom lip warning them of the assault to ensue.
Mouth on mouth our tongues dancing with each other,
I felt our souls collide, it was then not pausing for permission they conspired to be one.