I was always so lonely
when I was with you
You spoke of the weather
and other mundane realities
yet I hung on to every word
held helplessly captive by your voice

And even now I’m solitary
long after you've evaporated
I have frequent and interesting
conversations with others
but it all seems empty
I’d rather hear you speak of the weather

- Vijayalakshmi Ramachandran
   03/09/2006
   Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

it just doesn’t seem fair
that i’m at work
while the world takes a holiday
and it certainly is annoying
that you are at home
and i can’t be with you
i while away the hours
on this and that
talking, laughing,
trying to get some work done
but Einstein was right-
it feels like the seconds are dragging on
this day just doesn’t seem eager to end
i think – “I hate working Saturdays”

but then finally its time to leave
and that’s when i realize
what is so special about today

today i don’t return to an empty dark house
i return to you!
You are at home to welcome me in
with a hug and a kiss
and some little surprise
that you always have for me
every working Saturday
suddenly even in this twilight
the day seems brighter
and lovelier
i think – “i love working Saturdays”

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   05.01.2013
   Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

when is a work of art not just a work of art?

at what point does it stop
being only a thing of beauty
and transform-
the self
the society
the Universe
                                                                when does it transcend the real
                                                                and become something magical
                                                               helping one fall through –
                                                               the rabbit hole
                                                                the wormhole
                                                                the black hole
                                                                                                                                      when does it become
                                                                                                                                     an unstoppable force
                                                                                                                                     and cause –
                                                                                                                                     a revolution
                                                                                                                                     an evolution
                                                                                                                                     an absolution


                              and at which moment does  it make you stop in your tracks
                                                          stop breathing and exclaim
                            “Gar Firdaus, ruhe zamin, hamin asto, hamin asto, hamin ast!”

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   05.01.2013
  Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish,

a wasp flew a straight line
from its nest to me
cloaked in puny sunshine
it thought itself to be free
unheard was its buzzing
unseen its rainbow wings
untold was what it carried
i only felt it sting
the suspension like a drawn sword
cut through the silence within
the absence of feeling retrieved
was healed by the relief of loss
an epitaph if to be given
would affirm the infinity of the end
a promise given in portions
partitioned to satisfaction
make one see through the gloss
to the plainness within
that grieves in honour and truth
shedding tears of blood
it tastes the purest fruit
in the acceptance of its pain
lies the moral of our story

- Sneha Iyer & Vijayalakshmi Harish
   04.01.2012
   Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish & Sneha Iyer

where else would i go my friend
in my happiness and sorrow
I climb over that fence
and upon your threshold share
my thoughts – little and big
my feelings – like sea waves
who else listens like you do
to my rants and raves and whines
Who else understands
that all I want is to vent
who else realizes that what I’m looking for
is not a ready to use solution
that I’ll figure it out on my own
all I need is someone to listen
while I’m doing just that
so thank you for being
the window to my conscience
and know this too
that whenever you need
i’m just on the other side of the fence
come over when you wish
and I’ll listen to your tales
we’ll laugh and cry together
till there’s nothing left to say.

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   04.01.2013
   Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

Marriage
like I’ve already told you
is largely a function of
trial and error

it is an exciting adventure
and you’ll enjoy learning
about each other’s likes and dislikes
quirks and habits
eccentricities and uniqueness

celebrate your individualities
as much you celebrate your togetherness
both are equally important

what works in one marriage
may not work in another
each marriage, like every individual,
has its own unique personality
discover yours

but there are a few things
that are constant and necessary
Mutual Trust
Mutual Respect and
Mutual Love

Love him of course
for everything that is good in him
but more importantly
love him for his flaws
be there for him when he falters

because the world can love him for the former
but only you, my dear, can love him for the latter.

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
        04.01.2013
        Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

pain
is
an
unusual
gift –
it
helps
appreciate
pleasure
better -
i
hope
for
healing

-Vijayalakshmi Harish
   03.01.2013
   Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

the night is my truest love
come to life. The lullabies
soothe like the shallow stream
rounds the sharp pebbles
therapeutically. Your mouth
now the extension of the curve
that begins on my own and
then becomes aflame.
i am not yet dead and cold –
but I am steeled
the darkness is the furnace
that has forged me.  the floor
a peaceful mother of pearl.
the silence a lover
that appeases my nerves.

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   03.01.2013
   Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

and the poet said to the mountaineer
don’t look at the peak
as a goal to be conquered
look at it instead
as a loved one to be adored
and explored
and it shall be yours
forever

- 03.01.2013
        Vijayalakshmi Harish
       Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

distended the pearls are red and uncovered
upon my mistakes. erasure taunts.

something stirs unbidden strangely
familiarity dissolves in tears

suddenly distant the sun streaks
through the black waves

nothing works anymore

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
         02.01.2013
        Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

the night has spurned me
the moonlight descends
in a mockery
of tones unheard
voices whisper in my head
they float as comic bubbles
over the sleepy town
your mouth opens
in a yawn and ends
as a chasm into which I fall
the darkness is a refrigerator
freezing everything still
the whiteness of the floor
a jarring ice. I cannot
put my foot down
the silence so heavy
it drags my eyelids

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
02.01.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

using the ink of experience means
leaning on what is known
building on what has been done before-
but what of those things
that move in the realms of the unknown?

The Inuit’s tongue speaks
A hundred words for snow
as in the midst of it
they live and grow

if that is true
for the words we speak
wouldn’t it also flow
that for the passions we most feel
our inner vocabulary is more?

for sure I’ve known
loss and pain
with morbidity had
a mild flirtation
sadness has been a bedfellow
I’ve played with jealousy
and envied greed
with vanity I often meet
I’ve been intimate with fear
fought with guilt
and broken up with anger

with love I’m best friends
happiness smiles at me
in solitude i am at my best
with mirth and joy
i search for peace
abundance and acceptance
are welcome guests
and enthusiasm brings me
the gift of zest

and so on and so forth
i’ve known them all
for better or for worse
but what of those
i know not yet
far away on some distant shore

i do not even know their names
so clueless as to their identity
can’t put a face to any of them
unaware of their personalities
strangers they are
and so will they be
until someday they find me

the only question that is left to be answered -

will I know them when we meet?

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
01.01.2013
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

The conch poked and prodded bursts
Into multicolored fragments
Startling the gulls into
Bewildered flight

The beach cakes my insides
Hand and foot and head and heart
In the sun’s heat it turns to glass
Splinters tear my mask

Loneliness fits like a glove
It rubs like sandpaper
On my sense of self and us
Gradually we erode

Ideas like octopus arms
Multitudinous waves forth
But are concealed by
their own black inky mist

the waves rise and fall
unaware and unconcerned
but we too frail too unimportant
in the larger scheme of things

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
01.01.2013
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

what are endings but new beginnings?
the living are mirrors of the dead
and the darkness the consort of the light!
in the midst of extremes we hang in balance
in the thick of chaos, we find our silence

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
  01.01.2013
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

blank
page
fluttering
in
this
periodic
breeze -
anticipates
my
story,
what
shall
I
write?

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   01.01.2013
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

The Wait:
don’t look for love in public spaces
love is shy always
hesitating she comes with flowing grace
to the patient lover
in the end all that is needed
is to look into the mirror –
in the reflection of your eyes
you’ll find her!

The First Smile:
Oh! Say not that this world is mean
do not turn your face away from me!
the lack of a smile in return
was not intended to spurn
but your smile left me so captivated
so caught up and fascinated,
that even as my heart somersaulted,
my lips forgot to smile!

Being Together:
the mist hides my secrets,
of it are born my desires
the arc of the moon expands to contain
every wish of this lovesick heart
the morning but amplifies this-
the sweetness of the night’s embrace
on sleepless pyres were burnt our passions
on winter’s breath our dreams impaled!

Inseparability:*
Love isn’t Love
until one sees
that I am You
and You are Me
so where lies the question
of coming and going
wherever you are
there I shall be!

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

the one who is gone
is finally at peace
beyond retribution and vengeance
it is we the living
who must carry that burden

baying for blood is not enough
building a memorial is not enough
emptier still are sorrowful words
this, now, is the time to get tough
time to show we’re made of sterner stuff

to what depth has my nation fallen
this indeed is our season of shame
but let us not dwell on what is lost
let us look at what we can raise up
let us make this change work

for you and me and for those to come
build a new nation from ground up
start now! before it is further delayed!
no more injustice must we tolerate
no more can we let ourselves stagnate

we fight in her memory
that is true
but it is a fight for all of us
from every nook and corner raise your voice
herald the revolution that must come!

-Vijayalakshmi Harish
29.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

Not much was said
a minimum of words spoken
but within the sparseness of the verbalizations
lay powerful emotions –
after all they were
poets both
whose hearts thrummed
to the same metre!

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   29.12.2012
  Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

little drops of goodbyes
lingering at the doorstep of my consciousness
unwilling still, vacillating
in denial they wait
with some empty expectation
that they will be invited back in

but sand once fallen through this hourglass
is never the same sand again
something of it is lost
something of it is gone
and its taken some of me along

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   28.12.2012
  Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

hypocrite memories and perjuring core
deceive me repeatedly

every single recollection i have
is swathed in our smiles

a remembrance of the depths in your eyes
that left me always mesmerized

that window stands as a memorial
to impatient vigils

and your every word-kinder than those of others
rings forevermore in my ears

somewhere the paths diverged
no more we walked as one

yet try as i may i cannot remember
when or how that was done

and maybe that is for the best

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   28.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

cups of warm tea
shared together
over dog eared pages
on a cemented bench
covered with leaves
raindrops singing in tandem
to a rhythm known only to frogs
and here we sit
staring into the mist
wrapped in the warm blanket of silence

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
27.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

trio
of
smiles,
perfect
decorations
for
the
season’s
festivities -
brightly
lighting
virtual
streets

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   26.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

if some day, i did forget
my name
my place
and everything that I did
would I still remember
how to write?
is it like cycling- a skill once learnt
that is never forgotten
or is it a gift
once lost, never to be found?
would I recognize these words I’ve penned
with passion and pain mingled-
would I feel the joyful comfort I’ve felt
in their expression?

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
25.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

lost
in
your
mind
maze
i
find -
                   this
                   here
                    is
                   where
                    my
                   happiness
                     ( hides ) !
- Vijayalakshmi Harish
26.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

nimble
footed
reminiscences
skip
away
from
me    
           i
                          run
                                 ­               after
  and
get
hopelessly
                       ­                                                                 ­                                                

               ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                         lost!

-Vijayalakshmi Harish
26.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

in this nearly empty train
i sit by the window thinking of you
every minute that passes
takes me farther away
and yet
I’m joyous
for i can feel
the waves of your love
washing over me.
You, my love,
are the smile that refuses to leave my lips
others look, wondering why
only I know .
you are the strumming within my chest
that never ceases
yours is the memory
that never leaves.
i smile
even as a solitary teardrop
rolls down my cheek
and falls on the cool surface
a compound of pain with pleasure.
i’m conflicted
yet at peace
sorrowful
yet happy.
and isn’t this
what love is about,
what it has always been.
- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   25.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

Merry                Christmas              to                    you!
Christmas          cheer                bringing         happiness
To                      bringing            goodness          incarnate
You!                  Happiness         incarnate         being!

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
    25.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

an oddity, an aberration
an icon, an inspiration
like the fabled camel through the eye of the needle
i am a miracle

through centuries of strife
i’m awake
through stories of me and mine
i’m awake
beyond chains and wings
i’m awake
in the ***** of the day
i’m awake
in the freedom of the night
i’m awake
unbowed, untied
i’m awake
in war and in peace
i’m awake

can you really look me in the eye
and tell me I’m not?
can you do me an injustice
and not feel terrified?
can you shove me aside
and feel complete?
can you bury my story
and live undead?
can you take what is mine
and stay forgiven?

i am compassion, i am pride
i am I

i am the earth and the sky
i am the source of life

i am gold that is purified
i am the carbon that has crystallized

i am every woman
i am I.

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
         24.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

time
trickles
timorously,
threading
together
thoughts
through
ten­der
trembling
tears -
twisting
their
tired
themes

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   24.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

behind
my
words
and
smiles,
lies
buried
the
treasure
of
dreams
that
you
seek

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
24.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

when Sita asked Rama
to get her the golden deer
what did she actually want?

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
24.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

These lambent, sun-kissed roads
are strangers to me today
New and fresh with promise
they lead on as if to say -
walk with us silently
onwards to new dreams
bridge all these myriad distances,
break down these barriers
why must you stay fettered
when you can discover yourself?
is this what the universe has planned
or is it a spell you’ve cast?
that every happiness that heaven has
lies within my grasp?

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
  22.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

squirming
in
his
seat,
searching
within
his
shirt
he
magically
pulls
out
a
butterfly!

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   21.12.2012
Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

इन आँखों मे नींद आ तो जाती है                                                        Sleep does come to these eyes
लेकिन रुक नही पाती                                                             ­            but it never stops a while
ना जाने क्यों यह आँखें                                                            ­           I know not why these eyes            
बन गयी हैं तुम्हारी परछाई                                                            ­    have become your shadow.
इस तनहाई से बनती थी मेरी                                                            T­his loneliness used to be my friend
तो आज उसे देख                                                              ­                 then on meeting it today
मैं क्यों मुस्का ना पाई?                                                             ­         Why couldn’t I smile back at it?
क्यों भटकती हूँ मैं इन राहों मैं-                                                          Why­ do I keep roaming these streets?
क्यों मैं तुम्हारी यादें भुला ना पाई?                                                    Why can’t I forget your memories?
- विजयालक्ष्मी हरीश                                                             ­            - Vijayalakshmi Harish
  २१.१२.२०१२                                              ­                                         21.12.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

there were those days
when my thoughts
washed upon your shores
freely  for you to pick and choose
and to cherish if you would

but now
the waves have fallen silent
the clams, they stay shut
why would they open?
unloved, unwanted, unheard
they decay

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   20.12.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

is it you who sent your caress
through this wind-
was it your loneliness
that made me shiver
and reach out in despair?

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
  18.12.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

my mind meanders
as the night grows restless
reaching out with passionate fingers
that draw me out of my stupor
                                                  i’m twisted in their embrace
                                                  conflic­ted, astray in this maze
                                                  with unquenched desire they pry me open
an endless procession of memories -
set free from their anchors, they rise up
contorting themselves to the tunes of                       “Should I enter or not?” asks the labyrinth
“what if?” and  “ why not?”                                                           the maze gifts me dead-ends
demanding answers that cannot be given

                                                     an­ argument of the heart with itself
                                                     is not one that finds resolution
                                                    th­e decision is the destination

in the end they all await the Sun

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
  17.12.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

two smiles on either shore,
an ocean of tears lies in between
how does one even swim across-
all i can do is drown!
softly treading water
escaping the shards of lost dreams
sometimes my heart shattered
and there are some that i have broken
there is much kindness that i do not deserve
and yet much kindness is due to me
in this mist of shifting identities
how do i navigate-
all i can do is lose myself!

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   16.12.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

what is this thing
that resides in our silences
threatening to reveal all
in that brief fearful moment
before the curtain falls?
a monstrous beast be it
like the one that the Grimms described
gentle in its grotesquness
it leaves its trace behind.
this paradoxical distance
becomes longer with each word spoken
like a mobius strip
twisted within itself
it leaves me craving for closure
Schrödinger’s cat I am
neither built nor broken

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
        14.12.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

Would you stop for a minute
and lie down by my side,
look up at the stars with me
beneath this blue night sky?

Would you tell me your story
your secrets and your fears
and trust me to keep them safely
as we peel away the layers?

Would you take me as I am
hurts and tears and all?
and seal each scar with a kiss
help me stand up when I fall?

Would you hold my hand and walk with me?
I’ll stay forever by your side
dance together to some private melody
forgetting the passage of time?

Would you believe me when I say
that I’ll catch you when you stumble?
I’ll never let you fall
won’t let our world crumble?

Would you let me
lean on you when I’m tired?
and protect me from harm
so not even death can tear us apart?

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
14.12.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

Would you stop for a minute
and lie down by my side,
look up at the stars with me
beneath this blue night sky?

Would you tell me your story
your secrets and your fears
and trust me to keep them safely
as we peel away the layers?

Would you take me as I am
hurts and tears and all?
and seal each scar with a kiss
help me stand up when I fall?

Hold my hand and walk with me
I’ll stay forever by your side
hold you when you stumble
lean on you when I’m tired.

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   13.12.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

unfeeling
eyes
weary
breath
your
lips
gently
caressing
mine
- all
          the
            p­ain
                         m       e           l              t            s
away

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   9.12.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

Scraps of poetry are all it takes -
whoever says words are “sweet nothings”
is so sorely mistaken
and has never known that intellectual ******
that comes from reading emotions
in perfect juxtaposition

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
   09.12.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

my subconscious writes me letters
gentle urgings -
from that deepest space
where dreams go to rest
and fears go to hide
little fragments of inspiration
that dance provocatively
only to vanish
when i rise from my stupor
little ghosts of memories past
present and future
bound up together
as unfailing reminders
that wherever i go
i will always be me

-Vijayalakshmi Harish
30.11.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

What delightful alchemy this
this metamorphosis of a dream
a condition like an apsiopesis
which assumes I will be back
I inhale the fragrance of this ink
and exhale it as wine
it gives a nice toast
to our love
soaring like a lammergeier
Well in the throes of passion,
it splinters into a flower
the omphalos of which
is a moment awake
beyond rest or relaxation
may we be together forever

_ Vijayalakshmi Harish
   24.11.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

is there a word in your mind
that you'd like to give to me?

a word for me to take to bed
as i spend a sleepless night?

a word for me to cook up
to create some food for thought?

words for me to string together
yours and mine welded in the fire

- Vijayalakshmi Harish

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

gently bid the night  goodbye
it nourishes no more
the unblinking stare of the stars
no match for my candlelight
wakefulness is more coveted
as everyone else dozes
pieces of calm snatched away
from a world that eschews it
in silky silver voice i sing
lullabies to the waves
the sand gets between my toes
soft and grainy roses
the wakefulness that comes now
has white metallic motifs
shimmering away
mother of pearl
lights the road
across the ocean

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
  21.11.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

our
language
silently
reflected
                                                      ­                   (without)
                                                       ­                ?answers?
framed
by
shy
eyelashes
                               ­                                                       …asking…
//permission…
to
desire

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
  20.12.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish

long long ago
your verses did decline
an invitation to ******
to merge with mine
no loss was made no profit forgone
except the one that stayed unborn

your verse became a voice unbound
testing waters deep within
blowing hot blowing warm
underwater treasure newly found
in the collective it went for a swim
I wait at the shore lamp in hand

verse and voice are not enough
the fire within needs a touch
gathering words on the beach
unbidden within seashells hidden
mindful the hunters crouch
i the gladly hunted am so much

- Vijayalakshmi Harish
  19.11.2012

Copyright © Vijayalakshmi Harish