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Victoria Isabel Nov 2013
Soul drifts further
          Heart gets colder
Victoria Isabel Nov 2013
His touch
reminds me of yesterday
we can never get enough
faded

our souls connect
i dont know what it is about you
i just loose myself
in our tornado

His smile
reminds me of the way you look at me
seeing me
knowing me,
dado

we fit
on any occasion
we're constantly lit

his kisses
not like yours
your lips soft
yet controlling
on our own ride of toxic love
overflowing

these memories
are conspicuous
but unfortunately i have to dismiss it

cause all it really is
is an illusion
fueled by two peoples fire
they'll never be smoked out
cause theres' no solution.
i've fallen for someone i can't have, while trying to move on with someone different
Victoria Isabel Nov 2013
To whoever,

I'm hiding this so deep
if my mother knew
she'd weep
im lost
i do whatever i want
no matter the cost
i'm in pain
i can't seem to breakaway
from something so toxic
yet i always come back to play your game
i'm confused
what happened? yesterday you were down
today you refused
your actions leave my heart bruised
Isolated
my best friend left
all i have are these memories
i miss her
come back thats my only request
Voiceless
my mouth is wide open
but nothing is said
i just want to yell
i'm left wordless and distressed
i do as i please
i smoke trees
putting my mind at ease
i stare in the mirror
her appearance is vaunt
but in her eyes you could see the truth
what does she really want?
idk just overwhelmed.
Victoria Isabel Nov 2013
I lay in darkness
my mind drifts
thoughts eating me alive
my body shifts
another thought and the anxiety grows
feels like the first time i tried blow
my body shifts
i think about your lips
and our passionate affair
but the thought of you with someone else
leaves me breathless, gasping for air
my body shifts
i stare into nothing
wondering when will i become something
feels like i can't stop running
my body shifts
its these sleepless nights that i fear
no candle or source of light near
i can't silence these thoughts
my body shifts
i close my eyes
and sigh
inhale and exhale
now i'm high
my body shifts
i feel my body less tense
my thoughts are now at rest
all it took was this blunt
now it makes sense
my body shifts
my mind drifts away
into the subconscious i go
ahead of me, there’s a lit up passageway
where will my dreams take me?
Who the **** knows
My body shifts
Victoria Isabel Nov 2013
why do i lie?
why do i steal?
why do i hurt the people i love?
why do i hide?
why am i full of secrets?
why do i do drugs?
why do i cry only behind closed doors?
why do i like her?
why do i like him?
why do i like both genders?
why can't i come out?
why can't i let go?
why am i still in pain?
why do i feel alone in a room full of people?
why do i do the things i do?
when will i figure out who i am?
when will i get my life together?
when will i be the weight i want to be?
when will i earn my parents trust?
when will i be able to look at my reflection?

why can't i answer these questions?
Victoria Isabel Nov 2013
Lines lined up
Dollar bill rolled up
Drinks poured up
Ls rolled up
Pills sealed up
  
Sniff
Drink
Inhale
Pop

I’m faded
Money is lost
I’m drunk I can barely talk
High, I’m soaring
Barred out I’m numb
Leaning on somebody to help me walk

Sniff
Drink
Inhale
Pop

Im gone.
Victoria Isabel Nov 2013
I told you I loved you
With a smirk you dismissed me
We couldn’t be
I hid the pain
You don’t know how much it broke me

In the same circle
We hide
In the same crew
We hide
We’re good at telling lies

How could you be so oblivious?
You see me and never see what’s hidden
The pain you gave me
The games…
You just ******* played me

Everyday I carry this pain
This pain that forces me to self-destruct
A forbidden love that is so corrupt
But that’s just our game

But that’s the last time I swore
I’d never tell you again that I loved you
Because you’re stuck with that *****
And you know the choice you made
Cut us apart
And it was with your own blade

Our friends don’t know about us
We’re caught up in our fame
We both choose to hide
When will we finish our ****** up game?

— The End —