Once just a doormat under foot
of those she found about in life.
Helpless to loose the one inside,
she hid among her wounds.

She knew her life was made for more,
and spent her days to find a peace.
And rise above the noise and pain
of just an average life.

Her world was such a futile war,
a battle fought against her foes.
This feud fought daily with a prayer
to search for purpose in debris.

These struggles brought her to this day
to close the door and leave the night.
To free what screamed within her soul
for all those troubled yesterdays.

The girl that lived inside of me
has now become a woman freed.
To live her own true spirit born
within a prison cell now flown.

Now both the blessings and the tears
of all the long fought yesteryears,
Have melted into lessons learned
for the all past is left behind.

To find this heart come spilling forth
and dancing gleefully about.
For I am free to live my life
not shackled from the past or doubt.

My blessings now beyond belief
and joy on joy is now released
Tis true perfection our God makes
when once he choses to create!

I hear the bells and see the signs of Christmas all around,
but this is such a special one for me words can’t be found.
Through a year of desperation and a time of healing too;
a special celebration after all that I’ve come through.

Last year God heard me praying for this painful life to end,
and so He sent me angels to mend my heart instead.
Now as I drive down city streets and see lights all aglow,
tears of joy stream down my face for all I’ve come to know.

So I kindly told dear Santa to give my gifts away,
to other ones that need them more than I this Christmas day.
For I’ve been truly blessed with the greatest gift of all;
a peace that can’t be understood and God answering my call.

My house is filled with grateful thanks on this the Holiest night,
and you can find two Christmas trees trimmed with the brightest lights.
The first to celebrate the time of this our Savior’s birth,
the second to remind myself of all that I am worth!

I marvel at this broken child who lived inside of me,
who struggled for so many years just longing to be free.

To live a life unburdened by my dark and early years,
that made my youth a living hell wrapped in unspoken fears.

My haunted past and broken heart could never quite recall,
the missing piece tucked safely back behind a guarded wall.

So well my mind protected me from all those silent fears,
that n'er did I suspect what lie behind those childhood tears.

Like the ghost it was, it came to me to haunt me in the night,
and brought me to my knees when life refused to treat me right.

Then suddenly, though sent by God, you've given me the key,
To open up these long locked doors and set my spirit free.

Now each sweet day is filled with so much joy and hope I find,
that little girl, so happy now, is dancing in my mind!

One night I had a blessed dream just after you had passed,
a dream about a crystal church, a place I’d come at last,
From a dark and dingy basement, through a hole that I had found,
a tunnel lined with precious gems, hues vibrant all around.

I crawled out at the other end and found myself a guest
in a crystal palace like the ones I’d seen from Europe’s best.
The place was vast, so beautiful, but still through glass I saw
the brightest sea of spring green grass spread out from the far wall.

The air shown bright with shimmering light, like glitter dust it wore
and all the walls reflected light I’d never seen before.
I turned to find me in the midst of figures glowing bright,
like beings lit within themselves in pure and holy light.

The angels that surrounded me had gathered all around,
Too busy with their newest guest to see I didn't belong.
I looked to one I knew was you and tried to hug you close,
But you had not yet gone to gaze upon the Heavenly Host.

And though on earth you were my size, you now looked down on me,
I understood, though nothing said, you had somewhere to be.
I watched as others led the way to a violet mountainside,
far off in the distance many walked with others side by side.

New bodies they were given seemed to float along the ground
a flawless, pure perfection given to all that could be found.
I stood there looking at the sight and knew that I’d been blessed,
and when I woke I felt at peace to know you were at rest.

Much time has past since this sweet dream, a vision from on High
was sent to me to calm my heart and say my last goodbye.
Though this it did, I still can see the angels and the hall,
a gift to see a glimpse of what is waiting for us all!

As surely as heaven exists above,
you have found your way into my heart;
your magical voice and hypnotic smile,
your whole being speaks silently to mine.

Your eyes dance in the morning light,
so kind and compassionate,
as they smile beneath canopies of lashes
and move me without a sound.

I cannot forget the times you called to me,
your soul joining mine as we stole away.
My forever love, though only in memory you live.
I keep you alive in dreams wrapped in your arms.

You carry me with you far outside this world,
with your extraordinary reigns on my heart.
Sweep me away with a love I cannot resist,
to a special life for just us two.

You're the best of the best,
one whom I can trust,
my inner most secrets I confess.
You have been my all in all, the best of the best.

You're as deep as the sea
and as bright as the stars.
You're the one that I can count on
for now and through years to come.

You're the person that can hold
the wanderlust in me and keep me close;
the one who steals my heart away
and brightens my every day.

You love me with a love,
timeless in this world
of thrown away dreams, relationships and love.

You make me believe in the eternal
the make believe and the invisible
forces at work in our lives.

You have been there
through all the hard times,
when I did not believe.

You have lifted me
to the heavens and beyond
to a new world eternal in you.