I know in my heart that God brought me here for a reason.
With you, I feel complete – as if I have always belonged here and have come home.  
I see my life and past experiences with clarity, everything in a pattern leading up to this time – a meaning for it all to have reached this point.
I have never been surer of anything in my life.

(My mother says)  Love is a compromise, all the way down the line.
Love is not easy or a “fairy tale” -  it is something that has to be worked at and appreciated.  
It is a fight with fate – probably the biggest fight of ones life.  One has to constantly ask oneself “Is this love worth fighting for?”
It is always easier to just give up and walk away, as long as you know you will not always be looking back or looking to replace the same.  
If you give up, do you really win or lose?

If you are not over it, your heart is like an open wound that hurts and hurts and never fully heals.
It might scab over, with time, but you will always have the scar.
Sometimes the scar will not let you forget.
I wonder if scars are God’s way of reminding us not to do it again,
Some, like us, are foolish enough not to heed this and go back (in) for more
Most only get hurt again and again but …
A very few are lucky enough to find the cure the next time around and heal the wound.
I am so glad God let you and I be two of the lucky ones.
They say, “There is a reason for everything”.
Was it worth the hurt to get to where we are now?  
I think so.  “Love cures people, both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it”.

Sometimes you have to let go, even when you don’t really want to, to be sure.  “If you love someone set them free.  If they don’t return, they were never really yours to begin with but, if they do come back, you know it was meant to be.”

“A relationship is like a rose, how long it lasts no one knows.
Love can erase an awful past, love can be yours, you’ll see at last.
To feel that love, it makes you sigh to have it leave you’d rather die.
You hope you’ve found that special rose, ‘cause you love and care for the one you chose.”

“Today I begin to understand what love must be, if it exists.  When we are parted, we each feel the lack of the other half of ourselves.  We are incomplete - like a book in two volumes of which the first has been lost.  That is what I imagine love to be; incompleteness in absence.”

With you, for the first time in my life, I feel complete.

I fell in love with a boy a long time ago
But, in reality, I fell in love with a vision of who he could be
I always knew there was a wonderful person deep inside
But he was filled with demons trying to take over his soul

Now, years later, he’s come back into my life as a man
And the demons appear to be gone
I can’t help but wonder what happened?
Is it because he finally grew up?
Did he find a way to “chase the demons away”… or
Did God realize this good man had been through enough and now could find the light?

And although I’m happy he’s finally found peace
As, at times, I was sure he would never make it this far
I can’t help feeling somehow that I’ve been cheated
Out of all those years and
Out of something that could have been deemed 'a wonderful life'

Where was this man when we were together?
All I got to see were the demons who were controlling him
And the demons that finally drove me away
Now, it appears that he has “calmed the beast” inside him
Twenty-five years later down the road

Years ago I fell in love with the man I knew he could be
There has always been a connection between us through all those years
And through all those tears, 'Soul mates'?
Now that he’s finally the man I knew he could be
I’m not really sure I know him at all…
Because all I had were the demons to go by

I’m scared to take the chance to get to know this “new man”
As I have been burned so many, many times before
Even though we have known each other for more than 25 years
We are still dancing apprehensively around each other…..
He, I think, because he wants me to realize he is a “new man”
Me, I think, because I can’t believe he finally is a “new man”

I wonder if it is because I’m too scared to trust it
As I have too many times before
Or too scared he might really finally be what I always wanted him to be
But only to find out now that it is probably too late.

Anyone who has ever loved someone in prison or in jail.
May not know what it is like on the inside but will go through their own hell.

They will tell you what you want to hear, which may be all lies, to survive.
Some who believe it all will get eaten up alive.

They call it "jail talk" so the listener beware.
Don't take it to heart because you may find out that they really do not care.

They will call to say you're wonderful, that they love you and want all your time.
They need to keep you sweet because they're really after your last dime.

They will call to tell you how lucky they are to have you and that they want it to be forever.
Then smile to themselves, as they hang up the phone, for being so clever.

People who have been through it may warn you; others will laugh behind your back.
They will say that you are stupid and wonder how you could believe all that.

You are in a fantasy world so snap out of it and do not be so blind.
I'm not trying to burst your bubble; just trying to be kind.

If you choose not to listen you will soon see.
That you were just being used and that they're not the person they pretended to be.

Your world will come crashing down and you will never be the same.
But if it happens again, you will be wise to this game.

I was told that there is a reason it is called "jail talk"
Because usually once they are free and done with you, out of your life they will walk.

I once knew a guy who got sent away.
We wrote each other letters and talked on the phone every day.

And while he was gone, we became best friends.
But who knew when he got out that it would come to an end.

I should have known it was all "jail talk" and that you had lied.
"What happened to my best friend?" I kept asking you as I cried.

Everyone tried to warn me but I just could not see.
I told them all that my best friend would not do that to me!

But they were all right when they told me it was just a play.
I could not believe that someone would go that far for a place to stay.

But people do and say things all the time that are not true.
I did not want to accept the fact that I was being used by you.

I cry everyday because I feel as if my best friend has died.
I have thought of ways to get even because you have lied.

I need to move past this and get on with my life.
Especially now since you are married and have a new wife.

You are still trying to play me but now I can see . . . .
That for all my wishing, you were never the best friend you pretended to be.

I wonder what it must be like to have no conscience, no guilt, no shame,
To not take responsibility for your actions but find someone/something else to blame.

To call it fun when you play with a person's heart.
To have no emotion as you watch them fall apart.

Your love at first so hot soon turns very cold.
You smile as you remember all the lies you have told.

They soon learn that any feelings you show are all very fake.
There is always an ulterior motive for the reasons you lie and take.

You cause destruction in most, if not all, of the lives that you touch.
Then move on to the next victim you will soon use as a crutch.

People call you psychopath or predator because that is what you are.
Once you are done with a victim their life will be scarred.

You will do or say anything to get what you want at that time.
Doesn't matter if it is their heart, their soul or even their last dime.

Life to you is one big game with different players to con.
You will use them up and spit them out once you have had your fun and move on.

Their tears and heartache will fall on your deaf ears.
When you are gone they are devastated and may stay that way for years.

They should be smart and learn how to read the signs.
You count on the fact that they will give you the benefit of the doubt and be blind.

It is easy to spin your web of lies because they do not know the real you.
They do not realize that you are very shrewd in studying their weaknesses and the things they do.

That is how you know the best way to worm your way in.
If they decide to play the game, there is no way they will win.

They may try to outsmart you but their rules and yours are not the same.
They forget you have no emotion and that is how you win the game.

Yes, I wonder what it must be like to go through life this way.
Since I was stupid enough to let you in my life and regret it every day.

They will bombard you with love and tell you what you want to hear.
They will tell you that they are your soulmate and that you have nothing to fear.

They will do or say anything to get what they desire.
They become quite adept at being a smooth liar.

Keep in mind that if it sounds too good to be true,
Listen to your gut instinct – it’s trying to protect you.

They will torture you with triangulation and convince you that you are the crazy one.
Then they will devalue and discard you when they have used you up and they are done.

They count on the fact that you will keep giving them the benefit of the doubt.
They are actually reeling you in but you are so confused you haven’t quite figured it out.

They are pure evil - do not fall for their lies.
Sooner or later their mask will slip and you will see through their disguise.

They will make you miserable – you will tell yourself this is not how you behave when you love someone,
But you will never make them see it that way because to them it’s just a way of having fun.

You will start to realize when their true self begins to show,
But keep your guard up because you never know how far they will go.

They call it emotional **** and that is exactly how you will feel.
You will soon understand the love you thought you had wasn’t ever real.

Then they will move on to the next victim and leave you alone.
Don’t beat yourself up – just hope they stay gone.

They have no conscience, no remorse and you are just a pawn in their sick little game.
Once you have been the target of a psychopath, you will never be the same.

A psychopath’s bond is a hard thing to break,
But you have to be strong for your own sake.

Everyone has come into contact with a psychopath at some point in their life.
It could easily have been your mother, your father, your husband or your wife.

We have all probably been victims of a psychopath but some of us just never knew,
Until you start reading the information about them then you will know it’s true.

Being fooled and falling in love with a psychopath is very easy for me to see.
I know firsthand the horror of it all because, yes, it happened to me.

V. Cheek
9/04/2014