With you
I have
Begun a new
A new life
A new me
A new  sense of how
to be
Be long
Be live
Be hold

Be have
Be
With you
With me
Us
You with me
Me with you
Us
Together

Happy us

Abounding
Surrounding
Confounding

You showed up
I hid
I hid
my baldness
My aching heart,
My body broken
But my longing
My love of life
My wanting
To be
Myself
To create
Everything
From beginning to infinite
Everyday
All day
Into night
All night
Art
Verdant
Seeping from
Every wound
You touched me
I woke
For the first
Breathe
You gave me
Belief
Inspiration
Navigation
You
Are

You  are
                  
                      my

alarm

You                        are

                        ­              
...MY
                                                     Alarm.



...I
on my own
....wake myself

just  Seconds

...before  

you
                 create

your

noout
of
  

sleep

The

mind says
                                      back


to
dreaming.


...The  chest
                          beats...


M­y     heart  

                           belts

out

a
single

softly formed
and
honest
and

sleepy
               ...word.
        
        


...Happy
                   ... Happy!
          
         ...HAPPY.                                                        ­  


    
mind
being
body
heart  
             ...skip together

My

mouth  forms
                                      ­ bright
and
                                                        sunn­y smiles

                                                         ­           

Imagine
                    ...now

four
            little
                           girls

beaming
                 with mischief
          


Burst

into laugher
all
                             together

Each

Holding               securely

onto
the
other
                   one's
Hand

...they
                       skip
                                               along







The one
who takes
the time
who cares so deeply
you are my
wake up
call in the mornings
around mid day
and then again all through my night
You make this sound
It is in my heart...

BoBEEP BoBEEP BoBEEP
Heard by me
meant for me
Not any other
EAR may hear
The sound
your
heart
makes
inside of
MINE
makes

I was born  an Angel
blessed with wings of light and tenderness
I was destined to fly

you broke my wing

you held me back

you took my light
then hid it in
the darkness
of
your illness and dispair
After years of                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  
ha landed in a santuary of healing

you

As emotion rushed to me
and through me
On that first day we met
You were an Angel
An Angel with spiked
Black
***** Hair
I heart bursting
overflowing with love
copassion
Empathy
Pain
Abandonment
Guilt
and Rage
you hid them well
deep within
Your
tough exterior
Cloaked by your jet black
spiked doo
You were my Angel
I just knew
Instant bond
I bound to you
My day dream shatered
As you spoke
with kindness
You were ther to say your
Goodbyes
To all who knew you
fairly well
I was not
part of this crowd
So see
It's fate working its magick
For you to leave me now
Would be just tragic....
You came to bid your crowd farewell
You'd be leaving that afternoon
You would be leaving way too soon
I saw you.
I approached
I introduced myself.
You replied with kindness
You knew of me
So much
for our friendship
it would now never be
With tear filled eyes
I made my plea
Oh, please
Jackie,
Don't leave me!
I just cannot go!
..I have just now found you
I am here all alone
no  mother
no sisters
no brother
no one
to care
for no
one
to love
No one
to laugh
with
happy hearts
Always
alone
With hopes
so high..
Always
have been
left
behind
Left standing
on my own
holding on to the
smallest memories
of a time of laughter
a time of peace
A time without
time where no one
ever leaves
Behind
the little
girl Soldier
still at war
a
war
worth
winning
some...
...anyone's
love
yours
is most
special see
so
Please
don't leave
Your words
told
a story of
reumions and laughter
As tears fell
from my eyes
my heart
crushed
under
the weight
of
Memories
they remind me
of cruelty
of a
careless
disregard
shown
the
little girl
soldier
you had never known
she
was dying inside
from wounds deep into her soul
Only years later  
would the
Angels reveal
why
had
brought
you
there
The day
you met  
the
little girl
soldier.
The day
you ended a deadly war
You put out fires
And tore down bridges
You held my hand through 20 more years.
You are my Angel
Thank you
for being with me
From that day until this...
You held me through many troubled fits
Some lasted minutes
other years.
you never left me
YOu never grew tired
The litle girl soldier loves you still
without her tears


love
a




I think back to that moment

I am
      
     passed

trying
to
understand

your
intentions

what

they were,

or

what
they could have

ever

blossomed

into
                
             for me.

Why
              
did you

choose

         me

to torment


What

was it

about
me
that

made
you

want
to

hurt
          me

insult
          me

belittle
          me


then
run
ruff shot
over
         me

when
I
      was
have
      been
will
       be

the

ONLY
       person
who

has
and
      will
ever

stand

by

your side

no matter
what
you've
done.

even
so
you

treat
        me

like
a
piece
      of
trash

you

would

just
as
well

wipe

your
***
     with.

You
have
disrespected
                     me

my

home


my

heart

and

my

    dream

of
ever

having 
a
      life
with

you.

I
have

been  
        
     tormented

by

you

until

I

really

just

want
to
be

rid
of
you

and

of
anything
to
do
           with
you            

any
memory

of
you

ever

having
been

a
part

of
            
          my life!

Your

pure

unadulterated

filthy

meanness

is

so
obnoxious

and
heartbreaking

that
I
frankly,

want
nothing
more

to do

with
you

    ever

        anymore!

I
want
to

be
far
       away

from
       you!

I
pity

you!

I really do.

I wish
you
well

but
I know

now

you
will never
experience
any
kindness
in
life
without
me

Simply

because
you
never wanted
my kindness
nor
me

you
were
out
to take it
from
me

So
now

is
my time

time
for me

to pick
up
the pieces

of my
broken
life

for me
to
move

onward

in
search
of
myself

tossing aside
what
I have left
of
the
material things

to
build
for myself
a

new life

with
the
nature
of my
spirit

and
the

faith

I have
in
my

own self worth.

you
have left
me
with
nothing

except
a
handful
of
hurtfilled
memories

and
with
the

realization

you
never meant
to
do

anything
but
hurt
my heart

and
betray
my
kindness

while
you
test
my
faith in
what

could be.

Now
all

I feel
is  
disgust
at
my own
stupidity

not to
mention

my
repeatative

self destructive
action

my
simple
hard
headed
ness

when
it came to
trying
again

and
again

to
make
things
work
with you.-

-You
never
cared enough

to
even try

so
I
am

as of
this

moment

gone
  
             gone          
                               gone

gone

out of

your  
reach


Your

insults
and

ignorant
gestures

can
no longer

hurt me

as

I
don’t

care

what

you do

or

what
you

say
        anymore!

Or is it that nothing in life really ever goes wrong.
Is it that life is continuous,  but we deny it?

but that life takes its course

no matter what we do

to change it,

to stop it,

to make it work,

or break it into pieces…

…and just give up?

Who do we blame

when we realize

that we have become unhappy

with who we are, or where we are going,

or that perhaps we are just not getting there fast enough?

Who?

When?

Why?

If we sit and ponder

our minds will wander,

slowly life will surely pass us by!