So there I stood in between the heavens and earth
Doubting if I should stay there
Or go
No one to call for me
To look for me
Leaving was what felt the best
For me and everyone
So there I stood
watching everyone in a white dress

I remember
The day you guided me
The day you smiled and said my name as if it mattered
The day you introduced me to your world-
your friends and your laughter
You let me touch your hair
Like I was trusted with something soft and sacred

The day you complimented me
The day we sat together
Close enough to blur the space between

Then they came along
Everything faded away
My life became like a sun
On a rainy day
When you were with them

You left me burning
And the extinguisher can't reach it
Like a flower
It still blooms
My heart still hides you
Always bleeding me open

When I see you from far
The distance keeps increasing
You are always in my head-
And not by my side

I saw a palace
Beautiful on the outside
Rotting in the inside
Who must have thought
Walked in straight
With no fright
No regret
Ignoring the telltales
Must have been blind

Now the only option left-
To **** myself
or to die