Every day seems like the last
Barely rested, pill down my throat, wondering when the next argument or fight starts.
Get through the day with the shadow lurking behind me yet it feels like it's not there.
I shower, steam filled the room, the scorching hot water on my back yet it still feels so cold.

Love is a mirror. one wrong move and that "love" becomes nothing but a fractured fairytale

I don’t get what I want and have daddy issues and don’t know how to be a man and grow up.

I hate myself so ******* much. I just want this to end.

The sound of beeping fills the room
The bright lights pierce my eyes
The weakness in my nerves
The tube down my throat
Even with all that
One thought remains
"I can never do anything right."

wake up with a smile.
walk out with a smile.
go through the day with a smile.
lie down in my filth.
let my smile falter.
let the pain out.

the darkness envelops me
the wretched screaming
the painful tears
the cry for help
but all was met with a crack of a whip

I pace back and forth
Thoughts all fixated
Alcohol, harm, love
Lightheaded, stumbling
The need for someone intensifies
The wanting to be alone grows
The crave for it to end overwhelms