In my Country
there's an epidemic of poor posture
with no one teaching us
how to hold our guts
I traveled to faraway lands
to learn the secret
of ******* in my *****
its like walking in between
two closely parked cars
as a young lad
I stood alongside another boy
cream of the crop
slick hair blonde and mine black
one girl left for her choosing
between us side by side
Sadie Hawkins went with the other fella
and I heard the adults behind me wince
it taught me something about my pecking order
in the meat market
yet it turned out the prettiest girl at the dance
still had the last choice
and it was me
we held each other close for a time
and the music played on
white gloves and shuffling black leather, thick soles

Is our name a destiny?
Why did Caleb advise immediately take the Land?
for his faith a bounty
these knights and conquering heroes
conquistador cops
vice squads ICE raids
trade war kinderlagers
borders and the shame
of the human smell
unwashed, ***** tired
I'm not that good, I haven't washed many feet
even my own are ***** sometimes
because my floors collect dust and dirt from the porch
that wasn't swept before I came
but I'm glad to be here
a chess board on the floor
and a fern that might make it
tomorrow
we hope to be better
tomorrow
like a new morning
looking out a bright window

they say the word goodbye
is a shortened form of
god be with you

I'm candle burning low
preparing for this moment
to shout into the abyss
a canary for those
oxygenated souls of the summer
its my turn, my line is called to the front
but before I go, here are my secrets
that I'll share with you

be kind babies
to your self most of all
this thing keeps stretching on
more twisted and simple than you
can ever imagine
so have fun
chop the wood
carry the water
adulthood is the longest period of life
it can also be the best part
learn a skill
let go of outcomes
it all happens in the now
be brave, go forth to meet your destiny with a full heart
and clear eyes
you have my blessing
goodbye

how can we be friends
               they don't love us

three minutes and not even a ****

well it wasn't much to expect anyways
          I sing prettier
barefoot
       walking on rocks

do the moans of the devils
and their lovesick blues
outweigh the choirs angels

three minutes to receive me
to make me one of your own
a merry band of travelers
set out on the road
a last hoorah of bachelors
the women
the moan

did anyone seem to have the time
its too far away now to know for sure
my baby's alright
she shows me the stars and the moon at night
points up at em with her little finger and says
'ooo'

she's a white speck on the black asphalt across the highway
like finding a grey hair in your beard
we can't stop
this infinite carousel
the abandoned mall parking lot
up and down round and round
there was something that someone was going to say
the tangent stretched on for an unbearable time
keep nodding and smiling
the words jump into this space
the slow draw never fires
the reactionary miss
its funny to see the change
in the face as they catch on
who is looking down
the barrel of this gun
a low rumble, chewed asphalt
do you see a meaning
i have one or two that you could borrow
the keys fall off the chain
the money drops out of the pocket
sometimes I can hold you
near and nearer, our bodies compressing and folding
for once our gravity combines
draw the curtains
smoke the mirrors
its cold

Stay strong and take things day to day -
you've done the hardest part
and now is the most desperate time
but you've your whole life
to live free now.

I could be falling apart
breathing this american air
the taste of kerosene
is on the tip of my tongue
pressed against my teeth
I can hold it and wait
once a traveler said to me
Jesus could put his tongue
into the back of his throat
and block all air flow
achieving nirvana
on a single breath
I exhale out ennui
another overdose victim standing beside me
and the mutilated legs from Tiananmen square
blown off by the country boys the party called in to ****** the city kids, or so its said
my words are noted in the public record
and I'm called up to the bench
and told to file a motion for release
in 30 days
I sit in a hallway and explain to the guy who found him
on indiana street because he just got the feeling he needed to go back
that nothings guaranteed on this timeline
but he only half listens
and looks at me with suspicion that softens
with steady detachment

all the masks
and mines a suit and title
the robe and the stare
are you on the level?