I’m being watched by everyone,
and everything.
But still I’m alone.
Left in the dark,
being watched by the monster that is me.

I hate roller coasters.
Their bumps loops and drops.
I go on them to fit in,
buy I always want to stop.
My friends are scared.
They scream and need comfort.
I pretend to be fine,
because they need help not me.
My hearts just quietly thumping.
I ***** every time.
But still I must ride.
I smile and say it’s normal.
But it’s not I feel horrible.
They make me sick and nauseous.
But still I ride them.
Because I can’t be the one to disappoint.
So I’ll keep pretending I’m fine.
But deep inside,
I hate roller coasters.
I never want to ride them.
But I do for my friends.
Because theirs no other option,
I can’t be the wimp.
So I’ll just smile and then cry.
I hate roller coasters.
Please don’t make me ride.

Smile
      Cry
          Put on your mask
                And get ready to die
                       That’s our life just accept it
                             Then you can go silently hide
You can take it of alone
     Don’t complain to me
          It’s just human nature
               Go hide and blend in
                     You can’t just be
I’m so tired of this mask
      But what the other option
             Burden others with my past?
                       They wouldn’t like me anyway
                             That’s why we always hide
                                  And silently decay

But it’s ok mines not that bad anyway

I swear to god.
I’m being watched.
But not by a stalker.
By my own “family.”

I breathe, it’s noted.
I don’t eat and I’m looked at like a thief.
My sister skips 4 meals.
But it’s me who needs help.

I can’t breath.
Surrounded like a dog.
They say I have space.
But it’s fenced and I’m chained.

I thank you for my problems.
Now go ~~~~ of.
“Don’t eat!”
Then,
“Do!”
Make up your mind.
I’m to busy for this crying behind my door.

My parents are mad.
I hardly speak.
I stay in my room.
I can’t ever leak.
I’m sorry I don’t love like you.
Love is earned for me,
and I don’t like hugs like you.
Leave me alone.
I know it’s just a touch for you,
but I really really just hate hugs.

I don’t want to stand, but I don’t want to sit.
It’s like life’s lost its meaning, my flames been unlit.
I’m boring now, and I never know what to do.
I want to be active, but I won’t even move.
I try to think, but hate my thoughts.
There’s so much I must do, but im too tired to even talk.
I want to get up, but won’t.
It’s like my battery is all run out,
and now I’m left with a broken soul.
I always feel so…
Empty.
Useless.
Bored.
I no longer have purpose, I’m just so done.
I guess life’s chewed me up and spit me out.
That’s just what happens.
But now what do I do?
Because I really don’t want to sit here any longer,
and I’m just not in mood to stand to.