I’m the Soil

I’m the soil—let me return.
The one with existence,
punishing myself
by being born,
by dreaming this life
and calling it living.

In this state,
I wander and grasp,
chasing shapes that fade—
knowing peace
was never meant to last.

What I perceived
was never mine to see.
And all I wanted
was to be surrounded,
just to forget
there was no one
there at all.

I have been
deceiving me
my whole life.