Everything used to be
so personal
its not way now

endless lies surround me
while honesty and feeling
lay strangled by the door,
their rotting corpses
seen only by my eyes

no one else has noticed
the change,
I would be laughed at

I remember one sunny day
when the leaves rustled
in the wind -
I felt so alive

its not that way now

I stopped writing poetry
a lifetime ago
when the world failed
and we all sat around
silently watching
our tiny deaths each day
which everyone denies

if you don't believe me
just look into our eyes.

We will always love each other - we whispered
as we separated indefinitely,
moving outward to a new world
strangely foreign and excited
cold and lonely - all at one moment;

We grew from individual experiences
with infrequent reflection on a closeness once achieved,
a momentary flush of warmth, then perhaps remorse
for a memory incapable of being maintained
by an insurmounting knowledge of the present;

We come together again -
blinding ourselves to the Romanticist's inability
to eternally capture that moment of happiness,
hoping, dare yet praying
that we might succeed where they failed;

We will always love each other, we whispered,
long ago, when we knew no future.

It is disappointing
not to be able to love you,
for visions of a dreamy nether world
where we caress each other
flaunt me endlessly
and I lie awake wishing
that our two hearts could beat as one.

I still want to hear
you loved me well
and then I can stop calling your name
and then I can sleep more peacefully

Images of a close embrace
with soft, tender kisses,
your warm flesh
touching mine,
a whisper of love,
muffled sounds of joy

Some people only dream of
passionate late evenings
overflowing with love
and endless kissing

of gentle whispers
and warm caresses
which create a world
within themselves

if you listen quietly
you can hear the soft purring
of lovers together
their joy shared so freely

this is a tribute to those
who rose above their fears
and especially to you
for it was in your tender embrace
that I abandoned forever my dream

My breath
then comes yours
then mine
rhythmically

furthering some greater scheme
transcending our lives
bordering the edge
of another reality

we are always there
words cannot describe
they merely tell us
what is absent
there are no physical bodies
no walls
no limitations

I cannot take you there -
you never left
we are there now,

no more pretending

This is a test:
see the world before you
see yourself

1)  What does it all mean?
      (choose one):
a.      there is no justice
b.     the world is a paradise unfolding
c.      someone made a big mistake
d.      I'd rather not discuss it

You have a lifetime to answer

I've been looking for you
invisible man,
how foolish your accuser
would seem
on some half-baked afternoon,
"child-like mentality"
his peers would say,
their raw disgust paraded
unchallenged

a faint shadow
seen only at night
you would reveal yourself
to me
and begin this endless search
I no longer question

I was choking
on the endless lies
we told each other
amidst loving embraces
and soft tender kisses

the words
fit so well then,
but
they were not meant
to have a life of their own,

I murdered them
because they were slowly killing me

I never said
I would be brave
in love.

Remember when
childhood heroes could do no wrong -
we could even trust them with our lives

and friends were forever
simply because they said so

and each day was lived
to the hilt
as if it were our very last

can you see something has changed?

there are no more heroes -
no one worthy of such honor,
and friends come and go
so many having said their last goodbye
and each day we hold back a little bit more

some say the future is our present,
I say our future lies in the past.