The city I live in is notorious
For timeslips
Walk round the wrong corner
And you'll be partying
With the Incas
Ah that doesn't work
Cos it time
Not space
I just think
I liked the rhyme
But even that's a disgrace
Does that happen to you?
In the middle of a ditty
You've got a direction
You want to go in
But the delivery
Gets all ******.

I just seen my footprints
In the snow
Good lord!
I walk funny
Like the left leg
Doesn't like the right
And won't look it in the eye
The problem is the hip
Denuded of articulate cartilage
The grind and weakness
Make my gait so obvious
If it gets much worse
I'll be walking round in circles
Getting more pathetic
Like an inverted turtle
When I look down
At the frosty prints
It's really quite a shock
If you want to know what time it is
It's always nine o clock.

Computer!
Make that 7% more convincing
No more than that
Don't want to raise suspicions
If we are to manoeuvre them
It's quite the subtle dance
Through the sun dappled forest
Where memory gets enhanced
I want to see
If you can make them cry
Or perhaps nostalgic
The biggest of the lies
Goosebumps
And
Raised neck hair
Is what your after
Maybe the feel
Of sand twixst toes
Upon the ancient shore
Enhance two twenty four
To one seventy six
Consolidate image
Centre in and stop.

My ma would say
It's bin a funny old year
But I remember her saying that
Since I've bin able to hear
Or at least to remember
That I could do the same
Everyone does it
Everybody is to blame
We generally don't  demur
To the ones we deem smart
There is in em
The  truth
That we feel in our hearts
But do us a favour
And check the year's news
And see just how accurate
These ***** were with
Their  views.

The provision of suicide booths
Would be like free air travel
For those who say
They'll leave the country
Should the other side prevail.

I've fallen asleep
At the back of the class.

Drukenactivity
There I just made up an new word
I know you don't agree with me
But that just makes you sound absurd
Cos the activity o the drunk
And the productivity
They sow
Makes you the biggest
***** that
I have ever known.

When you turn up
With nowt to say
But can't
Leave the keyboard
Alone anyway
What do you say?

What does a priest keep in his allotment shed?

Lettuce spray.

If you went on
Who do you think you are?
And found out
Your great step uncle
Was a high ranking ****
Or a distant cousin
The head of the Stasi
Would you feel complicit?
Even though your bloods
Arent that near
Cos it seems
Some of mine
Were Lodz ghetto
World War Two
Profiteers.

Before I hit my head
There's was a fog
That hemmed my vision
Myopia
Was my guide
To every poor decision
Since the blow
The mist has cleared
I see so clearly
Panoramic
But still
I lose each bet
Constantly
****
And tragic.

I wanted to start
An  impractical charity
Based on the amalgamation
Of two existing organisations
I decided on
Blind dogs for the Guides.

When one walks around
The things
All talk about
What is
And what
Cannot be
They
Make sure
The essence
Of what
You are not now
Allows
The things
You used to be.

I love terrible weather
But it always passes me by
I should go and work for
NASA.

Like in one of them fantasy movies
The hero draws the sword of power
To emphasise it's pureness
They make it ring
For half an hour

You try to be concise
To scallop metaphor
Cut back on the floweriness
Let sweet simplicity pour

But you think
The point's unmade
Your thoughts lay unleavened
Just one more verse my friend
What was that?
Six
Or
Seven?

I'm on the waiting list
For surgery
The gimpiness
From hip
To knee
I've got a serious
Physical defect
For all it's plain
To see
Them *******
At the actors studio
Will be lining up
To play me.

Cos it lives in your veins
And it crawls on your skin
It aches in your bones
Like some fell vitamin
And it alters your thoughts
It empties your bank
It drags to the light
All the things that you lack
It scatters your friends
They got their own trouble
tryin to deal with their own Jones
Here it comes! On the double

So you ask the question now dawning
Is the high in the night
Worth the cough in the morning?

The death's head dagger
Your grandad
Took off of
That dead ****
The scooter
From the chase
Of Diana's paparazzi
That banner that read
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
When George W
Landed that fighter
On that warship
In the Persian gulf
Good luck
Selling that stuff.

They don't care it dooms them
They don't give a ****
Oft portrayed as the earths saviours
They're just nihilistic humps!

Pick a friend
Any friend
And shuffle em
Into the pack
Could end up in the front
Or way in the back
Might be lost in the middle
Or at any point hence
If your buddy holds the crown
Could you mount a defence
Of him and you
And his family of course
Would you see him on the battlefield
On his big ******* horse
For they say
A fully shuffled deck
Will never be dealt the same twice
So if youre planing a dynasty
Seek different advice.

Have you got enough
To do it?

How's your supply?
Will it see you through it?

And those who
Gather round
Are they here for you?
Or just gossip bound?

Ration now thy scant resources
Lest there be some
Harsh recourses.

It starts early
The reverie
Of making it pro
The yawning maw of the Kop enthrals
All that hold true
To the way of the deep red
Hoping against talent
But not time
The impossible dream
Against reason not rhyme
It goes away
When the calendar balances
Still now and then
You drive a sweet one
As the defender advances
Into the bottom left.

Some sadness
Can't be burnt away
You'd get asbestosis
From the smoulder
You've got to wait
For brittleness
It's chips away
As you get older.

Is the nature of expression
Just a collective
Jumping off point
A result of tickling
Our unconsciousness
From sullen back to noisy front
Ejected
Deep within
To without
After Previous
Shoving its way in
As we went
Ambling
Through the cloud?

I'm getting
A ****
Tattooed
On my ****
But bigger.

You literally can't do anything wrong on here
It's like playing the bass.

I couldn't hear you cry
Underneath
My own obsession
Though
I wouldn't have known the sound
Beneath
What I viewed
As passion
It was easy
At the time
The things
I
Viewed
As
Prescient
Though they don't mean
Nowt to me now
There's not a chance
We could
Be begin again.

My brow ridge itches
It throbs
And aches
I can feel my family
And all that it takes
To walk my way
Round the place
Where I live
Three hundred thousand
Years
It takes
To forgive
All the things
We did in that gap
Now facing forward
We should know the things that we lack.

Great
Holy
Easter
Bright
The week that unlocks the door to the light
In the six weeks since the pancakes and the ashes
Selected abstinence
To the Lord brings a confluence
A coming together of saviour and saved
Through the shared experience
Of gratification delayed
While he starved in the desert
Tempted by pure evil for forty days
We gave up chocolate
That's how the lord we did praise.

That new oumuamua thing
That's passing through
Might pick you up
And take you with it
You
That's right
Just you
Show everything
There is to see
All the Kubrick lights
Every particle
That exists
And it wouldn't
Give you the shites
All the nuance
Of meaning
The boundless
Terribleness
You could
Understand
Every bit of it
And see nothing
But yourself.

When everything's empty
When everything's done
How long will you linger
Before you move on
You tickled me there
Don't know if it was meant
But you smiled
As I ******
Beyond
Recompense
And now what are we?
What did we become?
As you walk away
I've got me eyes
On yer mum.

Wait for the rain
To no longer remain
Shelter under trees
Till it  decides to wain
And then stride forth
To begin once again
No longer concerned
To be
Dry
Ever  again.

To crest the hill
Then down again
And do that
On repeat
If you see
Something new
Each cycle
That's really
Quite the feat
A way
To stave
The ennui
To brace
Gainst
Earthly care
Then come to terms
With the notion
That no one knows you're there.

Poets
Philosophers
And
Theoretical physicists
Pretend
They're
Up
To something.

Any moment now
A light will descend
Better take some with you baby
Around the bend

It comes and goes
To them that really want it
I tell myself,I'm not one of those
Only time will tell
If I'm not telling the truth
I don't know myself
Well,how about you?

When left is right
It's left to better men than me
To chase the light around the bend

All those nights I just dallied in vain
All those nights I lay twisted with shame
Time is leaking completely unchecked
Time to cut your self free from this wreck
Time to digest and quickly move on
Time takes the **** out of us all.

How does a penguin build its home?
Igloos it together.
Cos penguins live in igloos.

Photon?
Aw go on
I don't mind if I do
Well actually
You've got no choice
It is essentially you.

The Pythons
Refused to mock Jesus
His words
Inescapably decent
And true
Just the malaise
That followed with him
It'd happened before
Made anew

All the pro
And the anti

Every sycophant
And cynic
Accrued
Before the lacking
Made it all cliche
Before the naysayers
Shouted abuse

The golde rule
Of love over hate
Should surely have never been up for debate
Poorly copied by charlatans
As ****** berate
Just like they did to Elvis
After 68.

The generalities
Of how we diagnose
Our children
Seem harsh
And cruel
But what else
You gonna do?
We don't have that much time
And there's drugs
To push through
Should we have let em eat peanuts
And lose a few?
Or medicate
Remorseless
Chemistry
Anew?

I have a lot of difficulty with physical intimacy
A friend suggested a book called how to hug
Turns out it was the fifth volume
Of the expanded Oxford English Dictionary.

Don't won't to sound
Like George Formby
But there's no other way
Lest you ignore me
Cos the reverse is true
When I'm drinking whisky
It not Through others lives
It's the **** ****
Within me.

Licking *****
Is. O course
The job you have signed into
When  it goes  to  
The thing that thing
Doth damage the plate we know
That stamps the truth
How doth thou it do
And then contemplate into
What We all die alone
That seems where we came in here.

No one gets their milk
Delivered anymore
Supermarketisation
Has stunted the trade
Of the door to door *****
The randy Unigate agent
Has gone into the west
Bored housewife action
Beyond the behest
In 1978
27.8%
Of all kids born
Were the illegitimate children
Of a Milko
With the horn.

Hello how you doin where you bin what you doin when was the last time I saw you how's it bin where you bin how'd it go when did we last talk about life what's over there do you care what's the point where you spending the Christmas can you believe the strabismus of this ***** version o where we should be she  ovs not happy on this side o the ***** but why can't she just leave us alone?

I stood on a mine
It was in one of them movies
Where you ok
As long as you don't take your foot off
I've been here
For three weeks now
I've looked for every
Possible out
To maybe backflip
Away from the devastating blast
Or have a science
Save my soul at last
But nothing is apparent
I eat my last protein bar a week ago
My time is fading fast
I've **** myself five times
Lost count of the ****
Can feel my tendons
Contracting
I think this might be it.

Mark Rothko said it was always with him
No skull and crossbones needed
As through the canvas
You go swimming
He cared not for
Narrative
Or subtext
And such
Just how it made
You feel
Down deep
In your guts
The terror
The love
Overwhelming weight
That of history
And suffering
Belonging
And hate
Like smudged details of the universe
Doors without locks
A place he didn't put messages
A dead letterbox.

Every time I think of you
I'm overcome
No excuse
It a feeling that should not be
The pull I feel
So close to thee
I imagine you and me
In a state o ecstasy
I know it never will not be
Is that what I meant
Contradictory.

The dreams of meals past
Visited me last night
And made me
Revisit all my waste
By Christ there was
A lot of it
Hard to take it in
Talk about
Repenting in haste

Is it better
To **** little
And often
Or go for the
Bread and butter
Clean out?
I'm getting
Conflicting opinions
Down the pub
Cos you only get
So much mileage
When it comes to
Human silage
You'll get your
Comeuppance
There's the rub.

You can't have any pudding
If you don't eat your meat!
HOW CAN YOU HAVE ANY PUDDING
IF YOU DONT EAT YOUR MEAT?!?!?!?!!!!!!!

Do you remember them **** jokes from the eighties?
Windsurfers do it standing up
Why should you not wear Russian ******?
What's the difference between Shankly and Sadat?
A lot of em ended up as
T shirts
Posters and that

That's how much we used to love comedy
It certainly boosted the seaside economy

Now laughter is suddenly checked
What you mean by that?
I'll throw a hex
After the initial involuntary response
It is now a bit dodgy
To lampoon a *****

The idea you can
Corral the chuckles
Fits I suppose
With a society buckled

But try cancelling
A rouge AI
It'll laugh it your face
And then plan how you die.