I wish I could write love poems about you
But I've realised the love I feel that deep for ,  is not true
So I save my devotion at the tip of my pen
I'll never write a love poem about you , not now , not ever again

Do you know , I have pressed against the veins of my heart , to teach myself the feeling of unloving you ?

I have died far too many times , than I have given myself to live

Beaten and all bruised out
Clinging to the last breaths of our grief
The fogs of our cigarettes twisting between our teeth
Past lives shared within our eyes
We danced yet hoped we died
Forever living in the glory of our what if's
Bound by the  sacrifice we shared
We were sworn enemies,strangers now friends
We walked through the dregs we each paid 2 pence for
Searching through the corners of our jeans
For the years we felt complete
We sniffed at the dust of our memories
Pimples eating at our face as we dreamed of the glory of our lives
First we were 20 , 21 now 25
The years have surely gone by
But glued at the soles of our shoes
Was a promise , a lie ,a fantasy
Only we were wild enough to believe
But heavens by the times , did we choose to see
What time would do to you , to us , to me
Foolish disposables walking through the end of the world
The end of yours , of ours even mine
But as we swore at the dawn and washed away the breeze of the night
The day , the light ,the life even the time
When we had sat with our reality
Our truth
Our fault
Our nature
Heaving the sighs of Finally growing up

There was something hidden within my loneliness
A never ending feeling of settling within the edge of my glory days
I hadn't had a drink in ages
Why was I so complacent
I have broken from my prime
Why am I so concerned
I haven't had a smoke in a while
Why do I smoke
Why
Why am I alive
Why
Why
Why
Such questions without a question mark
I've burdened myself from my younger days
I'm incoherent, indecisive
Why do I care
No body cares
If I ****** at my dignity with parentheses
An overload of unbearable redundancy
My patience has strung its way through my teeth
Why am I failing year 11
Why do my peers smell like sweat
Do I smell like sweat
All these questions without question marks
Have I become a period
The end of every sentence
The after thought hidden within the tortures of teenage hood
I haven't cried in a while
Why
Why
Why .... She whispered in the hollow room she shared with her therapist

Loving you was the last thing
I felt really good at

And there we were dancing with the stars ,how we always did
Knowing in the depth of our hearts
That we will drift apart ,how we always did
But how tragically lovely it is to know , you still love me
How you always did