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Sep 10 · 41
Clasp
Dissident Sep 10
Every breath an altar
To what remains unsaid

Each tear
A cathedral
Sep 9 · 215
Snook
Dissident Sep 9
We are  
stillness  
Before water break
Tenthousand ripples,  
Silent calling
Of midnight crane,  
And light  
Soft
Dancer
on the air
On the surface tension balance of
all things unknown.  

A warm wind  
Carrying the scent  
Of forgotten old summers,  
Cut through me.  

Tears
Here,  
Where the river bends  
And time and your pale thighs surrender,  
We are nothing but  
Two lines  
Crossed in a hidden current,  
Lost somewhere inside
the moon’s  
Secret arc
Sep 9 · 54
I Am That
Dissident Sep 9
I Am That
Silence  
Between your breaths,  
The wide  
Space where name  
Fades to  
Whisper,  
Night flicker  
Fire—glint  
Unseen
We meet  
In the falter,  

Two shadows entangled
Lost and found  
In the Floridian
rivernight
Sep 4 · 19
Attend
Dissident Sep 4
Life carries me effortlessly
Because I'm ultra light.
I weigh nothing at all
Just a whisper in hard vacuum
An unheard echo under absolute pressure

It is my name alone that the dream devotees babble madly as mantra
"Jivanmukti-Shiva-Buddha
Christ-Mother Kali"
Don't you see yourself
in my gore stained teeth
when i laugh?
When i sing?
When i scream?

As the Impersonal Self,
The Genuine Article
stillborn in vain
I am only what Is
&
Is not

No different than silent forest fog humming
The venerable war songs of Non-Being
Both fang and throat
peace of soil damp black

I am that old bullet hole hermit on the *****
Bearing my burn scar stigmata
No eye has ever seen
As one engulfed in meaning
I am pure virile alive-starving cannibal
proto-man embodied in pure condensed permanent Lust for existence
I gamble ALL for the sake of one heartbeat,
for One gram of scar tissue,
one touch of her eyes,
one crimson foot print,
one strand of hair fallen to the cheek

I lounge and doze here in warm fields of dancing citrus blossoms but
I love dancing too in this our noisy blood soaked chicken house
A raving lunatic ******* pure rot atop azure mountains of crystal attention
I alone am the singer of all love songs that die unresolved in the morning dew
I rejoice in the lack of safe refuge
Bare naked inside the silent hurricane.

As consumer of universes
I invent pain and anguish
Just to rip the desperate moan from the lips of every-man, at last!

'I' alone am the rotting corpse, poorly hidden within each man's beating heart
No-Thing more ever have I been
no-thing less could I ever be
CASE 3. GUTEI'S FINGER
Gutei raised his finger whenever he was asked a question about Zen. A boy attendant began to imitate him in this way. When a visitor asked the boy what his master had preached about, the boy raised his finger.
Gutei heard about the boy's mischief, seized him and cut off his finger with a knife. As the boy screamed and ran out of the room, Gutei called to him. When the boy turned his head to Gutei, Gutei raised up his own finger. In that instant the boy was enlightened.
When Gutei was about to die, he said to the assembled monks,"I received this one-finger Zen from Tenryu. I used it all my life and yet could not exhaust it" and then he passed away.
Aug 30 · 25
Heroin is my Heroin
Dissident Aug 30
In brief: scalpel words so cheap
Misanthropic cold compress
Jaded and hard in denial
Heavely Medicated without
Prescription

Mute Pain
Guilt soaked peace
Once more
At least
On this rock
I’ve built my church
And drunk of this poisoned cup
Enough

Salted sigh the spike
Do not resuscitate
For the bones of it
Are a pistol cool pressed
To a temple
Derelict  

Sleep without rest
Please, one more breath
Vein or scar
Blood loss
And the cost:
Everything
Posted originally Aug 2014
I have been sober as a church mouse now for almost a decade. If I can do it, you sure as hell can
Dissident Aug 30
Blackened pixel
The negative point
Of suicidal fire
Running
blind and barefoot
Each breath revolts
Subtly
entirely

full exchange /
This
reverse transmitter-
moment
Meets mind
with
Annihilating momentum

Every step fires
A catalyst transfer
Charged with absolute precision
Power throttles me

I can never stop
I can never look back
This is what I am now
Now this is what I am
Dissident Aug 29
Quarter moon through pine
branches

whippoorwill

Longing
Aug 29 · 27
Anti-
Dissident Aug 29
Her
Deer track wet
Her Rip tides  
And the thickness of my predation taste
I am alone mere
Water vapor
suspended in the empty medium
A mirage
Dining with lepers and ******
The brain here has to settle for the image
stored away somewhere in the synaptic catacombs
But pulling up this her scintillating portrait seems to please it no end
The self perpetuating mechanism
Fragments clasp and cling together with fragment
Peeling away
Mingled blood and saltwater
deep in the caverns
- I -
hover between the synaptic gaps
languishing
Among the sharp fragments of thought
hoping to string a few together and escape through a lone slit of sunlight
Alone-I
Exalt  suffer  howl
Now Scalping the loneliness  
Of the clotted humid tropics
Come back
Come in
Are your receiving?
Let me know if this message makes it
If it makes it through the razor wire
Through the melting dusk
Through the throngs of idtiotic
Military aged males
And lonely women
To
Hawkwise spiral up on the currents of your breath against my neck
Up The hot current of your breath against my chest  
in through and out this entire breathing sylvan aloneness
To lose itself awhile in the cirrus  
- [ ] Or fall down somewhere to drown in within kudzu choked deeps
- [ ] Yet

Somewhere in the vast-nothing-nowhere-universe

her kitchen light is still glowing
Aug 29 · 30
Her
Dissident Aug 29
Her
I have seen her shoulder **** and warm in
clean sunset light
Swimming in the rolling ocean of her exhale
Now I know I will live forever
Aug 27 · 21
Untitled
Dissident Aug 27
Do you misunderstand me?
Oh well
I understand you quite well
and with deep reverence

I am not interested in speaking to you
I do not converse with masks
Cowards

I am speaking to the body
To the animal-
Consciousness
To Nothing-In-Between
You:

Yes you,
Old
timeless-newborn

Don’t play coy with me, Lover

undercurrent

True One


Mystery.
Aug 25 · 38
River
Dissident Aug 25
Born and bred of the
Old Blood,
into this turgid violent current  

Though I wear the mask of deep survival,
I cannot help but see through the eyes of the Ancients  

wound-licker,
Soul-less,
The frayed anti-redeemer of all trivial anomalies.
Threaded and tangled in itself at the roots,
A lone ember in the belly of night.

hot cognitions—
Structure and unstructure,
A Self-organizing system misfiring
at its most critical boundary

All fight and no dog,
Snatching hard against a broken chain,
teeth and needle
sinking ever deeper into dark
Into stillness.

The hand of Fire reaches out,
And the hand of Shadow reaches in kind

I am
Is the river that i cannot cross
Yet I am that shore,
I am the lone current,
Carver and carved,
The obstinate raging flow

Blurred colors at a boundless edge named
Vision

dissolute alone in the placid twilight
Yet somehow
the scarlet thread of passion
weaves on
through the hills, along forgotten highways, fields
grocery stores, storms,
Into the very depths of a dying sun
Into those eyes  

Between furnace and night,
Napescent and breath
Lingers in the deep
A soft shadow fallen
On the sharpest edges

rhythm,
pulse
The forgottenlovesong

A clasp of whispered promises
Rolls down the unlit steps into the outside dark and is gone forever
Aug 25 · 42
Hot Cognitions
Dissident Aug 25
Between the hammer and the anvil,
I am white hot
Hay-colored and molten,
Dripping **** along the jagged edges
Of steel night highways.

In agony, in search,
I trace the valleys' shadowed thighs,
Run my fingers through all creeks, all rivers,
Remembering the forgotten taste of her,
Her sigh within all trees, in the grasses.
At night, under stars,
Weaving in and out of dreams, Far from the woodsmoke and fire
Dying in an ocean of hemlocks and ash.

Awake-dreamer-Emptiness itself seeking
Over fields, stone barns, abandoned churches,
For the face that holds everything.
The compass of the universe spins
Around her navel, her cheekbones, her eyes

I am pulled inexorably,
Ever tighter toward that center.
We dance on a fine silk brocade—
There are cities, trees, stars—
And suddenly, we fall through.


From the Wilderness,
Into the gaping dark dazzle of infinity.
Now, I speak only what can be spoken with all Being—
A reflected balance on the edge of the mirror,
The knife-blade plunge of honey-colored sunsets
Somewhere in the galaxy between her ribs,
The flame to its moth.
Aug 16 · 46
Cyclic
Dissident Aug 16
Separated from the tribe,
But noble and clean,
The eyeless monad,
Drifts on the scarlet sea of Dreams.

One reflective artifact,
Snagged within the reflection
of all reflections.
The dancing construct  
within a dancing construct ,
The invisible wind weaving through all branches—
Formless and egotistical ,
Both branches of one root:
Zero.

Atavistic emotions,
Sensate filigree
Minus continuity
petals on a breeze,
That disturb the surface for an instant
And vanish

This self that awakens
Has never known sleep

Honing in on
The Primary Doubt,
The deft cogito-scalpel of thought,
Lances all assumption
Beliefs, abstractions
Laying bear this unspeakable truth:

Listen-

The eternal law of stillness,
Holds all forests and hills in its silent embrace.
The gentle touch of it
Ripples in all rivers and mountains.

Far from the rusted gates and crumbling walls of the mind,
There is a place—
Where every leaf and stone,
Are burnt up in the blood-soul-fire
The perfect Will to Silence

Here, in the solitude-communion of sky and soil,
All language falls away,
And from this silence,
The stream is clear—
Pristine and bright,
Nurturing all that lives.

Lifeblood

Current

Channel

Enzyme

Tat tvam asi
Aug 16 · 47
First Strike
Dissident Aug 16
Yes
You are the first strike
The flint, the steel, the silver spark
Yes, you are, in fact, burning alive
You dissolve against the test
Melting quantum cotton candy
At the speed limit of Gods hot mouth
Yes
you're the dancing static of dreams
A fortuitous concourse of atoms
Yes you are already dead & birthless
Your gigantic solitude swallows entire copper colored mountain ranges
Vast cloud choked landscapes, silent forests and still lakes, where rolling planets lull and white dwarfs, red giants gas and sputter.
All/Not.
Yes you are born again
Neither lost nor found you find yourself
Awake at the dark hollow egde of another decaying era
But your foundations smoldered
Long before the deep Stone Ages
Remember?
before blood signaled Tanged Point Technocomplexes before the cardinal idiot's first monolithic abstraction-before the first eye ever blinked against the light
We mingled
dangling our feet over the edge a while there in that anti-light dawn
vertigo
before the flow took us again
remember?
Aug 16 · 95
Untitled
Dissident Aug 16
Resolute & yielding,
dyed deep in this color

Dream animal

I am

Dilated

Nothing now

But the wide open wound

She dances through
Aug 16 · 44
Untitled
Dissident Aug 16
Absent any and all calculations,

On the glass-clear viridian seashore,

The ego wave function collapses into

Humidity and rain—

Filled to spilling at the brim with summer thunder.
Rain-

The raw taste of it,

sultry, thick velvet touch to myskin,

Echoes the fresh heat of her riflehot gaze,

and sears into eternity itself
the image
Of her cool, pale naked radiant body against me.

If you would seek me,

Find me here—

Among the eddying vastness of  _

Between the weathered, marble pillars,

Amidst the silent spaces
Of the synaptic web.

Intertwined with

The razored open wound 

Of the event horizon,

Scarlet in its dying rhythmic pulse.

Smooth, in the subtropic lush

Mist, spray, and salt drunk air
 mingle with bloodshot sky.
I Breathe.

Gently

Gentle enough to shatter

The skulls of all the Buddhas

With the nine-pound-hammer of the instant:
Of

Wind,

Wave,

Pine,

Insect,
Foam,

Corona
Silence.
­­
My wiring stripped clean

Of all psychotechnology.

Emptiness now hangs heavy
on the ancient blackened hook

Of ivory starlight.

Within that deepening indigo dusk

Fingerprint smudged in charcoal gloom-
This feral,
Omnicentric / six-sense animal 
Dreaming-awake
Above and within Chronos' labyrinth.
Recollects effortlessly the
Seven billion years lived

On the delicate edge of a moth’s wing,

That I might better savor the weight, and crush of moonlight.

Eons in their trillions spent
As the color green,

Meditating through blotted out eons
On each exquisite shade of decay.

So simply remembered,

Are the lifetimes,
& cycles of lifetimes spent
As softness—

Now a lone petal breaks free of the bloom,

Falling,

Swimming,

Diving,

Dancing,

In ecstasy,

Arcing In flawless helix -

Absent any and all calculation.
Aug 16 · 35
I would paint her
Dissident Aug 16
With Grays and Blues
Awake before the grayscale
Is abolished by morning sun
She leans naked in the doorway
Watching snow slip
In the silence before birdsong
walking crooked fence lines
The steam of horse nostrils
fare to kiss her
As the dogs dance behind
snow still now on the hillside
Fireside
She reads alone
Laughing spilled wine
words she drinks
Content to leave
The kitchen light on
curled again in
Linen sheets and quilt
cool skin
She swims
In dreams
Of gray and blue

— The End —