Before I pooped my pants
in front of a live audience,
long after the age when
such a thing could be done
with impunity and without
embarrassment, I considered,
even obsessed over the possibility
or, rather, the probability of just
such a an event occurring until
it became, not merely possible
but inevitable, a self-fulfilling
prophecy so that, when it did
happen I was prepared--

I had on an adult diaper.

Blind faith, idolatry.
So tempting.

Though it's almost always misplaced.
Though our heroes always fail us.

Not their fault.
We expect too much.
We expect the impossible.

Open the cage door.
Let them go.

"I'll never tell" or "I'm telling"

Like two sides
of the same coin--
heads, tails,
neither choice bodes well.

Which is more disturbing?

I consider one way,
then the other
and conclude:

They're both really creepy

Zombies prefer young brains,
still pink, loaded with nutrients
and yet to be corrupted by life experience.

Zombies sit in their cars
outside grade schools, middle schools,
salivating, waiting for the dismissal bell.

They practice pick-up lines.
"Hey, how's it going?"
"What's your name?"
"Come here often?"

Zombies haunt online chat rooms,
posing as youngsters.
"School ****** today didn't it?"
"Wanna play video games?"
"Wanna meet up and hang out?"

Zombies sit on park benches in front
of the playground, watching, watching.
They bring their puppies.

Don't be a zombie.

Are we talking absolutes here? **** right!
Those rich, slave holding white male landowners
made it clear: "the right of the people to keep
and bear Arms, shall not be infringed"
and never mind that "well regulated militia," crap.

You're eighteen years old and a law abiding citizen.
Or maybe not. Either way you are "the people"
and anything less is a slippery *****.

First they come for your nukes,
then your rocket launchers, then your bazookas.
Then it's your hand grenades, then your assault rifles
and, before you know it, they'll take away
your right to breath, eat and blow stuff up.

So stand up patriots. Tell them crazy Dems "Hell No!"

Jeremy Meeks

Sick of it yet?