I have a friend,
named Pen Dulum,
a handsome man
who loves the pretty ladies.

And sometimes
my friend Pen
also loves the
big, stout lads.

So I guess it’s true,
what everyone says.
My friend Pen
swings both ways.

Women are the #1
cause of drinking.

When you find the right one
and times are fun,
you drink to celebrate.

When the right one
becomes the wrong one,
you drink to forget

And when there isn’t one,
and you are hoping for one,
you drink to pass the time.

Tell me what you’re feeling.
I know that’s not an easy thing.
Tell me if your leaving.
My heart can take the pain

Tell me what you’re thinking –
do we still have a chance?
Tell me what you’re hoping,
or is this our last dance?

Even if this is goodbye –
(that IS my greatest fear)
tell me what you want to say,
not what I want to hear.

You and me,
we disagree
about Democrats
and rioting,
socialism
and increasing taxes,
illegal immigrants
causing lower wages,
betraying farmers
fostering hatred of Blue,
and failing our schools.

Is BANG BANG all you have to say?

I have this tool –
I don’t know what it is.
My dad gave it to me,
and his dad gave it to him.

8” long and 3/4 “thick,
3” across the head,
made of solid steel
weighs about a pound

I’ve used it as a hammer
And used it as a punch.
It works well as a lever
and also as a wedge.

One day I’ll give it to my son.
And like my dad did to me,
I’ll let him forever wonder
just what the hell it is.

Thank you for dropping in -
I know your time is short
And mine is passing quickly.
So quickly you will

Learn to tie a bow,
count to 10, and
catch a ball

Make you own ponytail,
drive a car.
Flirt.

Find a guy
Say good bye.