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157 · Mar 2019
Change
sandra myles Mar 2019
change me i beg of you know
make me a person of whom i can be proud.

no more drink or drugs to make me not remember
they take hold for a moment but thats not forever

when i look at myself i hate what i see a person who wants to be free..
free from what ?
free from me
ill try drown my sorrows to wake with some more
it wont be worth it as i crave some more.

a mess full of hate and pain inside of me ill close my eyes sober and maybe wake up free.

SM
132 · Mar 2019
Constant
sandra myles Mar 2019
Silent tears roll down my face
i find myself in an awful place...
people judge and people talk
but in my shoes id wish they'd walk...

the road Im on is dark and cold
iv never felt so alone
theirs no 1 there nobody to care....

i find myself in a constant sad place 1 of which i wish to escape...
fight through my darkness and find me some light
but the end of the tunnel is never in sight....
am i stuck here is this were i should remain
i just want to let go and not feel the pain..


SM
129 · Mar 2019
As ive known....
sandra myles Mar 2019
Somethings start of as there meant to be…. Living breathing blinking feeling …
But what were not aware of is the darkness that lurks in the corner right there were nobody's watching beyond all the things the sky is blue the birds are happy  not realizing the dark that wants to consume us that wants to take our breaths ruin our smiles destroy our hearts……
But as iv become to know the darkness that lurks is that of a dark in our self's a part we were not taught of a part we were supposed to keep back lurking in the corner……BUT it gets us it takes its home deep inside of you….. I cant breath I cant laugh I don’t get to smile when your around I want you back in that corner I don’t want you with me…. Darkness why must you consume me……
As iv become to know you I become someone new a person cold and heartless a person who cant be true ill take a pill it will help you leave but maybe not your still with me what will it take to have you gone so I can go back to me?
Your taking to much its been way to long I control myself with dark rooms and bad choices but for what so you can grow strong ? darkness its time for you to leave I cant take it anymore please go lurking in that corner and stay there forever more…. It pains and it hurt what your doing to me you make me take a day at a time that’s not who I use to be….. but as iv become to know you your weak…weaker then me ill fight you and push you away. and ill back to been better then the old  me…..

SM

— The End —