I sit in silence.

This Never ending pain.

Where the dark clouds follow.

A never ending rain.

With every thunderous boom.

Its Causing me to shake.

A shivering sadness

From the water on my face.

My voice starts to quiver.

I simply cant keep up with the pace.

You see these thoughts are just racing.

They howl like the wind

Just twirling around

With no way to win

As these tears flow freely.

Staring out into the storm.

Striking deep in my perception

Of how I see the world.

With every bright flash

A different perspective percieved.

The thoughts they are now slowing

And so is the breeze

The thunder it weakens

Just a low grumble now

The soothing smell of the water

I put my knees on the ground

My mind starts to ease

A gentle wind at my back

I put a mask on my face

So that I can head back

To a world that seems broken

Until once again

The storm is awakend

But I know how it ends.

(Soft and eerie tune in a minor key, slow tempo)
The itsy bitsy spider, crawled into Sarah's hair,
Weaving webs of darkness, with every silken snare,
Out with eggs she planted, hidden deep within,
Out came the babies, where nightmares like to creep.
They whispered in the shadows, as Sarah lost her mind,
Crawling through her thoughts, with webs they’d slowly bind,
Round and round they spun her, in threads so thin and tight,
Charlotte's twisted children, brought fear into the night.
Her cries grew faint and hollow, as madness took its hold,
The spiders danced and scurried, in patterns dark and cold,
No more warmth or comfort, just whispers in the walls,
As Sarah’s screams were silenced in the cursed spider’s thrall.
They whispered in the shadows, as Sarah lost her mind,
Crawling through her thoughts, with webs they’d slowly bind,
Round and round they spun her, in threads so thin and tight,
Charlotte's twisted children, brought fear into the night.

An improbable role

I guess my mind is forsaken

Mental health is joke

But Dont be mistaken

People struggle with thoughts

But Weve turned it into a weapon

We fumble on words and the world judges us

A formal display that just tears us up

A societal fridge that freezes us up

But What is normal is this thing we call life?

That very question implys there's a standard to living

But Normals not real.

Its just what society makes it.

A general consensus does not make something real

Take the nazis, the mongols, the taliban and tell me their ideals speak true.

Society sets a standard

We dont have to apply

**** it ill just be me in this thing we call life

The world has come hard at me, but im like the sun.

This light will shine

The shadows cast are all behind me now

Moving towards what illuminates

I'll never be consumed by the dark abyss

I'm heading towards what's bright

This light

No matter how dark it gets

I'm like sysaphis. I'll just keep moving to the top of the hill

No matter what happens, I will break my curse

I might be broken within my brain

But that makes sense because Im Chasing what's insane

That's where I find what's improbable

The impossible coming to light

I'm building my soul.  

Every part is a missing piece.

Slowly building until I reach my peace.

The world has come hard at me, but im like the sun.

This light will shine

The shadows cast are all behind me now

Moving towards what illuminates

I'll never be consumed by the dark abyss

I'm heading towards what's bright

This light

No matter how dark it gets

I'm like sysaphis

I'll just keep moving to the top of the hill

No matter what happens, I will break my curse

I might be broken in my brain

But that makes sense because Im Chasing what's insane

That's where I find what's improbable

The impossible coming to light

I'm building my soul.  

Every part is a missing piece.

Slowly building until I reach my peace.

The world has come hard at me, but im like the sun.

This light will shine

The shadows cast are all behind me now

Moving towards what illuminates

I'll never be consumed by the dark abyss

I'm heading towards what's bright

This light

No matter how dark it gets

I'm like sysaphis. I'll just keep moving to the top of the hill

No matter what happens, I will break my curse

I might be broken in my brain

But that makes sense because Im Chasing what's impossible

That's where I find what's improbable

The impossible coming to light

I'm building my soul.  

Every part is a missing piece.

Slowly building until I reach my peace.

The world has come hard at me, but im like the sun.

This light will shine

The shadows cast are all behind me now

Moving towards what illuminates

I'll never be consumed by the dark abyss

I'm heading towards what's bright

This light

No matter how dark it gets

I'm like sysaphis. I'll just keep moving to the top of the hill

No matter what happens, I will break my curse

I might be broken in my brain

But that makes sense because Im Chasing what's impossible

That's where I find what's improbable
P
The impossible coming to light

I'm building my soul.  

Every part is a missing piece.

Slowly building until I reach my peace.

In the shadows of my mind, where darkness erupts,
Intrusive whispers echo, yeah, they disrupt.

Who am I in this tale untold?
A self-made lie, a story I hold.
Lost in thoughts, I roam this maze,
****** path or anxiety, in my mind im crazed.
Wandering deep within my soul,
Endless wonders, battles take their toll.

In this vast world, I sit and ponder,
How to halt this mental thunder?
Endless possibilities, they taunt and tease,
Yet, they won't define me, won't bring me to my knees.

An untold saga, battles every single day,
In the midst of chaos, I find my way.

It is what it is, with meaning deep,
I've overcome much, my promises I keep.
Prepared for any battle life might throw,
No, you won't see me rattled, I've learned to grow.

In the present that's sown, I stand tall,
Can't change what's happening, gotta deal with it all.

The untold tale of every man's strife,
Striving for excellence, defending family, risking life.
We put on a brave face, don't let it show,
Hold it in, so your family cant see your  woes.

That's the story etched in every man's core,
Facing battles, yet leaving the story untold....p

The world has come hard at me, but im like the sun.

This light will shine

The shadows cast are all behind me now

Moving towards what illuminates

I'll never be consumed by the dark abyss

I'm heading towards what's bright

This light

No matter how dark it gets

I'm like sysaphis. I'll just keep moving to the top of the hill

No matter what happens, I will break my curse

I might be broken in my brain

But that makes sense because Im Chasing what's impossible

That's where I find what's improbable
P
The impossible coming to light

I'm building my soul.  

Every part is a missing piece.

Slowly building until I reach my peace.

In the shadows of my mind, where darkness erupts,
Intrusive whispers echo, yeah, they disrupt.

Who am I in this tale untold?
A self-made lie, a story I hold.
Lost in thoughts, I roam this maze,
****** path or anxiety, in my mind im crazed.
Wandering deep within my soul,
Endless wonders, battles take their toll.

In this vast world, I sit and ponder,
How do you halt this mental thunder?
Endless possibilities, they taunt and tease,
Yet, they won't define me, won't bring me to my knees.

An untold saga, battles every single day,
In the midst of chaos, I find my way.

It is what it is, with meaning deep,
I've overcome much, my promises I keep.
Prepared for any battle life might throw,
No, you won't see me rattled, I've learned to grow.

In the present that's sown, I stand tall,
Can't change what's happening, gotta deal with it all.

The untold tale of every man's strife,
Striving for excellence, defending family, and risking life.
We put on a brave face, don't let it show,
Hold it in so your family can't feel your woes.

That's the story etched in every man's core,
Facing battles, yet leaving the story untold....

I'm Matthew P, here to say,
Got poems to share in a unique way.
Published 34, drafts were 6,
Now let's dive into these poetic tricks.

Complex emotions, they're my theme,
Half-siblings in my life, it may seem.
On the outside, I seem quite fine,
But inside, an inextinguishable flame will shine.

In the midst of silence, I find my voice,
In turmoil and pain, I make my choice.
Dark clouds hover, raindrops persist,
But I stay strong, can't be dismissed.

Thunder booms, shakes my core,
Tears blend with rain, emotions pour.
My thoughts race, like a tempest's wind,
But I'll find peace, within.

Bright lightning flashes, new perspectives rise,
Thoughts slow down, like the calm breeze' sighs.
Thunder grumbles low, scent of rain,
I find serenity in the midst of the pain.

Kneeling down, I gather my might,
Storms will pass, and I'll see the light.
With strength and resilience, I endure the strife,
For I know in my heart, I'll conquer this life.

Is anybody listening to what I say?
I shout it out, in my own way.
I sit in silence, my heart concealed,
A tale of sorrow, yet to be revealed.

As a child, I couldn't comprehend,
The pain I felt, I couldn't mend.
I wore a smile, a façade so clever,
Hiding the hurt, lasting forever.

But now I'm grown, I face my past,
Dealing with demons, I'm free at last.
I turned to drugs, to numb the sorrow,
To see tomorrow, I'd face the morrow.

I've kneeled and cried, asked the sky why,
Have I been punished? Is this my try?
But this soul won't break, it stands tall,
All these moments shaped me, after all.

In silence, an internal war does wage,
Behind my smile, I keep my rage.
Hoping for fate to change its course,
With each new day, I find my inner source.

To discover the peace deep inside,
Never forgetting the darkness, my guide,
The path from the shadows was worth the win,
I'm Matthew P, let the rhymes begin.

There is a thin line between reality and insanity.

But

what is normal?

Is normal just conformity to our daily lives?

We go about our lives working to make money.  

We pay our bills.

We save up

take vacation

and work for our retirement.

We hope to retire by age 65.

Meanwhile

we forget to live our lives.

So focused on the future that we forget our inner child who's dreaming of the stars.

To many people saving their entire lives

getting too old and broken to chase their dreams otherwise

The trails and mountains will forever remain mysteries because my body is too old and broken to make it reality.

It's so sad we can't see our youth is wasted

We were meant to be young and make mistakes.

We were meant to live with our minds, always wondering

It's been destroyed by possessions. We are holding

We have this world so backward.

Too bad money is in the way of us just being kids.

To bad what once was our imagination dies where our life begins.

P.s. drunken ramblings of a mad man

In the midst of turmoil, I find solace in silence,
Battling against this unyielding pain, I strive to stay calm.
Dark clouds persistently shadow my path,
As the rain keeps pouring, unrelenting, never-ending.

Each thunderous boom resonates within my core,
Causing tremors of sadness, shaking me to my very soul.
A shiver runs through me, tears blending with rainwater,
Emotions quivering in my voice, struggling to keep pace.

My thoughts race, a tempest howling like the wind,
Twirling relentlessly, with no end in sight, no victory to claim.
Tears flow freely, blending with the storm's cascade,
Gazing out into the tempest, it echoes my perception of the world.

With each bright flash of lightning, a new perspective emerges,
And gradually, the thoughts begin to slow, like the breeze subsiding.
The thunder's roar diminishes to a low grumble,
And the scent of rain calms, soothing my senses.

I kneel upon the ground, finding peace within my mind,
A gentle wind brushes against my back, providing support.
Donning a mask upon my face, I prepare to return,
To a world that feels fractured and fragmented.

But I know, deep down, that storms eventually cease,
They run their course, and peace finds its way back to me.
So, with renewed strength and resilience, I face the turmoil,
Knowing that this too shall pass, and I will endure once more.

In the midst of turmoil, I find solace in silence,
Battling against this unyielding pain, I strive to stay calm.
Dark clouds persistently shadow my path,
As the rain keeps pouring, unrelenting, never-ending.

Each thunderous boom resonates within my core,
Causing tremors of sadness, shaking me to my very soul.
A shiver runs through me, tears blending with rainwater,
Emotions quivering in my voice, struggling to keep pace.

My thoughts race, a tempest howling like the wind,
Twirling relentlessly, with no end in sight, no victory to claim.
Tears flow freely, blending with the storm's cascade,
Gazing out into the tempest, it echoes my perception of the world.

With each bright flash of lightning, a new perspective emerges,
And gradually, the thoughts begin to slow, like the breeze subsiding.
The thunder's roar diminishes to a low grumble,
And the scent of rain calms, soothing my senses.

I kneel upon the ground, finding peace within my mind,
A gentle wind brushes against my back, providing support.
Donning a mask upon my face, I prepare to return,
To a world that feels fractured and fragmented.

But I know, deep down, that storms eventually cease,
They run their course, and peace finds its way back to me.
So, with renewed strength and resilience, I face the turmoil,
Knowing that this too shall pass, and I will endure once more.

In the midst of turmoil, I find solace in silence,
Battling against this unyielding pain, I strive to stay calm.
Dark clouds persistently shadow my path,
As the rain keeps pouring, unrelenting, never-ending.

Each thunderous boom resonates within my core,
Causing tremors of sadness, shaking me to my very soul.
A shiver runs through me, tears blending with rainwater,
Emotions quivering in my voice, struggling to keep pace.

My thoughts race, a tempest howling like the wind,
Twirling relentlessly, with no end in sight, no victory to claim.
Tears flow freely, blending with the storm's cascade,
Gazing out into the tempest, it echoes my perception of the world.

With each bright flash of lightning, a new perspective emerges,
And gradually, the thoughts begin to slow, like the breeze subsiding.
The thunder's roar diminishes to a low grumble,
And the scent of rain calms, soothing my senses.

I kneel upon the ground, finding peace within my mind,
A gentle wind brushes against my back, providing support.
Donning a mask upon my face, I prepare to return,
To a world that feels fractured and fragmented.

But I know, deep down, that storms eventually cease,
They run their course, and peace finds its way back to me.
So, with renewed strength and resilience, I face the turmoil,
Knowing that this too shall pass, and I will endure once more.

So I'm just living In place

Where I feel abandoned

So my brother and my sis

Well they left Me to reminess

An only child of three.  

Ya they said they wish they couldve taken me


But the sad truth Is that I was left to my self

This abandonment this pain was all for me

No outlet or shoulder to lean

A child filled with rage with  no real direction to place it.  

No understanding of why just this hate inside

So lost and  so confused

why did they leave me?

Was it me or my mother who took care of me.  

This evil person they fled the only one left to take care of me

I sit in silence.

where do i begin.

to explain the sadness hidden within.

I'm telling you my hearts filled with sorrow from the past I could not control, as a child not understanding the world.

so I've learned to cope and Ive hid the pain. but never with my head bowed in shame.

you see i wear a smile that seems to embrace this world.

all the while your never knowing whats behind the eyes of a saddened soul.

am I being punished for sins that where not my own.

or is it time to man up and accept that now I am grown. Is it now up to me to deal with these demons, fight through the struggle and conquer these feelings.

Ive always risen above this pain.

regrettably not in the most helpful way.

you see I turned to drugs to mask all the sorrow.

just to get me by to see tomorrow.

only to look around and find my self kneeling.

crying out to the world and asking it why.

why have you punished me?

is this all just a test?

im giving it my all and I'm trying my best.

this soul cant be broken youve already tried I'll never be ashamed of these choices Inside.

the funny thing is I would not have it any other way for all these moments have shaped me into the man that I am today.

so I sit in silence an internal war always waging.

the fact that all this pain inside is hidden behind a smile but it is taken in stride.

waiting for fate to change.

with new hope at the beginning of everyday.

to find the peace within myself and never forgetting. the path from the dark was always worth winning..

Written by
matthew paschall

The truth behind my rap
It's sad because my family and friends just don't understand

The every day battles that I face.

You see these minor inconveniences that drive you crazy mean nothing to me

A constant battle in my head.

but its the worse type of pain because I argue with my self and it drives me insane

A paranoid delusion I have to push the side to appear normal in this thing callef life.

The only time I'm able to truly speak is when I rhyme.

Im too embarrassed and distressed to say it normally otherwise.

The problem is.

twhen I speak it out rhythmically it comes out to Clean.

So people just can't understand my grief

It's like a thief that comes out and steals my soul

But all the while I wear a smile on my face that hides a broken soul.

Just begging and pleading that someone catches it.

But it's like the words are irrelevant

They just bop their head and nod to my melody

Bobing their heads to a melancholic tragedy

So silly of me of me to think people could grasp all these emotions and pains through a minute of rap

There is a thin line between reality and insanity.

But

what is normal?

Is normal just conformity to our daily lives?

We go about our lives working to make money.  

We pay our bills.

We save up

take vacation

and work for our retirement.

We hope to retire by age 65.

Meanwhile

we forget to live our lives.

So focused on the future that we forget our inner child who's dreaming of the stars.

It seems so far...

To many people saving their entire lives

getting too old and broken to chase their dreams otherwise

The trails and mountains will forever remain mysteries because my body is too old and broken to make it reality.

It's so sad we can't see our youth is wasted

We were meant to be young and make mistakes.

We were meant to live with our minds, always wondering

It's been destroyed by possessions. We are withholding

We have this world so backward.

Too bad money is in the way of us just being kids.

To bad what once was our imagination dies where our life begins.

P.s. drunken ramblings of a mad man

There is a thin line between reality and insanity.

But

what is normal?

Is normal just conformity to our daily lives?

We go about our lives working to make money.  

We pay our bills.

We save up

take vacation

and work for our retirement.

We hope to retire by age 65.

Meanwhile

we forget to live our lives.

So focused on the future that we forget our inner child who's dreaming of the stars.

To many people saving their entire lives

getting too old and broken to chase their dreams otherwise

The trails and mountains will forever remain mysteries because my body is too old and broken to make it reality.

It's so sad we can't see our youth is wasted

We were meant to be young and make mistakes.

We were meant to live with our minds, always wondering

It's been destroyed by possessions. We are holding

We have this world so backward.

Too bad money is in the way of us just being kids.

To bad what once was our imagination dies where our life begins.

P.s. drunken ramblings of a mad man

What does it mean to live in the moment?

My perspective.  

Past=depression  present=happiness  future=anxiety drugs=mask

First I think we have to start with the past. So let's look at what it means to dwell in the past.

The past...  

We dwell upon the things we cannot change.  We think back at all our past mistakes.  We find reasons to hate ourselves for past choices we have made.  Yet while we do this we dont realize that the past is the past  and we cannot change what has happened.  We can only change what we do in our present.  This is key.

The future.....

The other thing us as humans do,  is dwell to much into the future.  We worry about things that have not happened and may never happened.  

This is anxiety.  

Why do we put ourselves through this?  Our minds are racing about the infinite possibilities that may or may not happen.  All the while we dont realize if we just payed attention to the present, we would see how beautiful this world truly is.

The present.

Some say ignorance is bliss,  it's this very premise that brings a smile to ourselves.

It's only in the moment we make the memories that are held up to years of life.  

Our accomplishments,  our happiness, our pain.

Drugs.  

  This is where I feel drugs become a crutch that some people lean on to deal with depression and anxiety.  

Let's think about that for a moment.  A person who is struggling to deal with the past or the future may find themselves doing some type of drug.

But why is this?  My perspective is that when they are on drugs it's the only time they are truly living in the moment.  The present.  

You become focused on the feeling you get from drugs and alcohol and your past troubles fade away. Then Your future problems  drift by as you take ahold of the moment that your living.  The present.  

Its only after the drugs fade that the worries of tomorrow, coupled with regrets from the past, come back to haunt you.  

In order to enjoy your life, you dont need drugs...you dont need alcohol...you only need to embrace the space around you.  Look around, take it all in, and enjoy it.

Accept the things you cannot change and accept that we dont know what tomorrow may bring.  

Just enjoy the moment, embrace it, Love it andd set your soul free.

P.s. Drunken ramblings of a mad man

What does it mean to live in the moment?

My perspective.  

Past=depression  present=happiness  future=anxiety drugs=mask

First I think we have to start with the past. So let's look at what it means to dwell in the past.

The past...  

We dwell upon the things we cannot change.  We think back at all our past mistakes.  We find reasons to hate ourselves for past choices we have made.  Yet while we do this we dont realize that the past is the past  and we cannot change what has happened.  We can only change what we do in our present.  This is key.

The future.....

The other thing us as humans do,  is dwell to much into the future.  We worry about things that have not happened and may never happened.  

This is anxiety.  

Why do we put ourselves through this?  Our minds are racing about the infinite possibilities that may or may not happen.  All the while we dont realize if we just payed attention to the present, we would see how beautiful this world truly is.

The present.

Some say ignorance is bliss,  it's this very premise that brings a smile to ourselves.

It's only in the moment we make the memories that are held up to years of life.  

Our accomplishments,  our happiness, our pain.

Drugs.  

  This is where I feel drugs become a crutch that some people lean on to deal with depression and anxiety.  

Let's think about that for a moment.  A person who is struggling to deal with the past or the future may find themselves doing some type of drug.

But why is this?  My perspective is that when they are on drugs it's the only time they are truly living in the moment.  The present.  

You become focused on the feeling you get from drugs and alcohol and your past troubles fade away. Then Your future problems  drift by as you take ahold of the moment that your living.  The present.  

Its only after the drugs fade that the worries of tomorrow, coupled with regrets from the past, come back to haunt you.  

In order to enjoy your life, you dont need drugs...you dont need alcohol...you only need to embrace the space around you.  Look around, take it all in, and enjoy it.

Accept the things you cannot change and accept that we dont know what tomorrow may bring.  

Just enjoy the moment, embrace it, Love it andd set your soul free.

P.s. Drunken ramblings of a mad man

What does it mean to live in the moment?

My perspective.  

Past=depression  present=happiness  future=anxiety drugs=mask

First I think we have to start with the past. So let's look at what it means to dwell in the past.

The past...  

We dwell upon the things we cannot change.  We think back at all our past mistakes.  We find reasons to hate ourselves for past choices we have made.  Yet while we do this we dont realize that the past is the past  and we cannot change what has happened.  We can only change what we do in our present.  This is key.

The future.....

The other thing us as humans do,  is dwell to much into the future.  We worry about things that have not happened and may never happened.  

This is anxiety.  

Why do we put ourselves through this?  Our minds are racing about the infinite possibilities that may or may not happen.  All the while we dont realize if we just payed attention to the present, we would see how beautiful this world truly is.

The present.

Some say ignorance is bliss,  it's this very premise that brings a smile to ourselves.

It's only in the moment we make the memories that are held up to years of life.  

Our accomplishments,  our happiness, our pain.

Drugs.  

  This is where I feel drugs become a crutch that some people lean on to deal with depression and anxiety.  

Let's think about that for a moment.  A person who is struggling to deal with the past or the future may find themselves doing some type of drug.

But why is this?  My perspective is that when they are on drugs it's the only time they are truly living in the moment.  The present.  

You become focused on the feeling you get from drugs and alcohol and your past troubles fade away. Then Your future problems  drift by as you take ahold of the moment that your living.  The present.  

Its only after the drugs fade that the worries of tomorrow, coupled with regrets from the past, come back to haunt you.  

In order to enjoy your life, you dont need drugs...you dont need alcohol...you only need to embrace the space around you.  Look around, take it all in, and enjoy it.

Accept the things you cannot change and accept that we dont know what tomorrow may bring.  

Just enjoy the moment, embrace it, Love it andd set your soul free.

P.s. Drunken ramblings of a mad man

What does it mean to live in the moment?

My perspective.  

Past=depression  present=happiness  future=anxiety drugs=mask

First I think we have to start with the past. So let's look at what it means to dwell in the past.

The past...  

We dwell upon the things we cannot change.  We think back at all our past mistakes.  We find reasons to hate ourselves for past choices we have made.  Yet while we do this we dont realize that the past is the past  and we cannot change what has happened.  We can only change what we do in our present.  This is key.

The future.....

The other thing us as humans do,  is dwell to much into the future.  We worry about things that have not happened and may never happened.  

This is anxiety.  

Why do we put ourselves through this?  Our minds are racing about the infinite possibilities that may or may not happen.  All the while we dont realize if we just payed attention to the present, we would see how beautiful this world truly is.

The present.

Some say ignorance is bliss,  it's this very premise that brings a smile to ourselves.

It's only in the moment we make the memories that are held up to years of life.  

Our accomplishments,  our happiness, our pain.

Drugs.  

  This is where I feel drugs become a crutch that some people lean on to deal with depression and anxiety.  

Let's think about that for a moment.  A person who is struggling to deal with the past or the future may find themselves doing some type of drug.

But why is this?  My perspective is that when they are on drugs it's the only time they are truly living in the moment.  The present.  

You become focused on the feeling you get from drugs and alcohol and your past troubles fade away. Then Your future problems  drift by as you take ahold of the moment that your living.  The present.  

Its only after the drugs fade that the worries of tomorrow, coupled with regrets from the past, come back to haunt you.  

In order to enjoy your life, you dont need drugs...you dont need alcohol...you only need to embrace the space around you.  Look around, take it all in, and enjoy it.

Accept the things you cannot change and accept that we dont know what tomorrow may bring.  

Just enjoy the moment, embrace it, Love it andd set your soul free.

P.s. Drunken ramblings of a mad man

It's sad because my family and friends just don't understand

The every day battles in which I face.

You see these minor inconveniences that drive you insane literlally have no bearing on me .

Its constant battle inside of my head an un wavering war that i dont know will end.

unfortunately its the worse type of pain because I argue with my self and it drives me insane

A paranoid delusion I have to push the side to appear normal in this thing called life.

The only time I'm able to truly speak is when I rhyme.

Im too embarrassed and distressed to say it normally otherwise.

The problem is.

when I speak it out rhythmically it comes out to Clean.

So people just can't understand my grief

It's like a thief that comes out and steals my soul

But all the while I wear a smile on my face that hides a broken soul.

Just begging and pleading that someone catches it.

But it's like the words

we'll there all irrelevant

They just bop their head and nod to my melody

Bobing their heads to this melancholic tragedy

So silly of me of me to think people could grasp all these emotions and pains through a minute of rap

The world has come hard at me but im like the sun.

This light will shine

The shadows cast are all behind me

Moving towards what illuminates

Ill never be consumed by the dark abyss

I'm heading towards what's bright

This light

No matter how dark

I'm like sysaphis i just keep moving to the top of the hill

No matter what happens I will break my curse

I might be broken in my brain

But that makes sense because Im Chasing what's impossible

That's where I find my self.  

The impossible coming to light

I'm building my soul.  

Every part a missing piece.

Slowly building until I reach my peace.

I sit in silence.

where do i begin.

to explain the sadness hidden within.

I'm telling you my hearts filled with sorrow from the past I could not control, as a child not understanding the world.

so I've learned to cope and Ive hid the pain.

but never with my head bowed in shame.

you see i wear a smile that seems to embrace this world.

all the while your never knowing whats behind the eyes of a saddened soul.

am I being punished for sins that where not my own or is it time to man up and accept that now I am grown.

it's now up to me to deal with these demons and fight through the struggle and conquer these feelings.

Ive always risen above this pain.

but regrettably not in the most helpful way.

you see I turned to drugs to mask all the sorrow just to get me by to see tomorrow.

only to look around and find my self kneeling.

crying out to the world and asking it why.

why have you punished me?

is this all just a test?

im giving it my all and I'm trying my best.

this soul cant be broken youve already tried.

I'll never be ashamed of these choices Inside.

the funny thing is I would not have it any other way for all these moments have shaped me into the man that I am today.

so I sit in silence an internal war always waging.

the simple fact that all this rage inside is hidden behind a smile but it is taken in stride.

A testament to my will.

Just waiting for fate to change.

with new hope at the beginning of everyday.

to find the peace within myself.

but never forgetting the path from the dark was always worth winning..

I sit in silence.

This Never ending pain.

Where the dark clouds follow.

A never ending rain.

With every thunderous boom.

Its Causing me to shake.

A shivering sadness

From the water on my face.

My voice starts to quiver.

I simply cant keep up with the pace.

You see these thoughts are just racing.

They howl like the wind

Just twirling around

With no way to win

As these tears flow freely.

Staring out into the storm.

Striking deep in my perception

Of how I see the world.

With every bright flash

A different perspective percieved.

The thoughts they are now slowing

And so is the breeze

The thunder it weakens

Just a low grumble now

The soothing smell of the water

I put my knees on the ground

My mind starts to ease

A gentle wind at my back

I put a mask on my face

So that I can head back

To a world that seems broken

Until once again

The storm is awakend

But I know how it ends.

I don't flow for you to listen to my words.

I flow in the simple hopes my words reach your soul.

You see no one understands the words as they're spit

They simply bob their heads and nod to the beat

A perfect representation I choose to bestow

About how us humans ignore our souls

It could be filled with sorrow and pain

Or I could simply flow about the sound of the rain

But if I asked you what I meant

You would probably lack my words intent.

So the next time that someone speaks

Find out what it is their soul is trying to teach

Do you understand how I feel when these words take ahold of me.

So strange how it goes with the melody.

  It's almost melancholic how tragic this magic grabs ahold of me.  

It's like something takes ahold of me.

Like these words arnt my own.

Like their given.

From somthin greater.  

Not a moment that's mistaken.

  Just a world filled with infinite impossibilitys.  

The spirit of my ancestors flowing through the possibilitys.  

Guiding the wisdom of my path through the sorrows that have plagued my family's past.  

Sometimes I feel that theres a spirit watching over me.

Its only after the drugs fade that the worries of tomorrow, coupled with regrets from the past, come back to haunt you.  

In order to enjoy your life, you dont need drugs...you dont need alcohol...you only need to embrace the space around you.  Look around, take it all in, and enjoy it.

Accept the things you cannot change and accept that we dont know what tomorrow may bring.  

Just enjoy the moment, embrace it, Love it and set your soul free!

It's sad because my family and friends just don't understand

The every day battles that I face.

You see these minor inconveniences that drive you crazy mean nothing to me

A constant battle in my head.

but its the worse type of pain because I argue with my self and it drives me insane

A paranoid delusion I have to push the side to appear normal in this thing callef life.

The only time I'm able to truly speak is when I rhyme.

Im too embarrassed and distressed to say it normally otherwise.

The problem is.

twhen I speak it out rhythmically it comes out to Clean.

So people just can't understand my grief

It's like a thief that comes out and steals my soul

But all the while I wear a smile on my face that hides a broken soul.

Just begging and pleading that someone catches it.

But it's like the words are irrelevant

They just bop their head and nod to my melody

Bobing their heads to a melancholic tragedy

So silly of me of me to think people could grasp all these emotions and pains through a minute of rap

I'm a modern day samurai.

But when I draw my modern sword

it's my words.

they cut so deep

A simple method of destruction that destroys the souls construction.

A perfect percussion of syllables that goes with the turn tables

It enables me to win the battle

I deconstruct your mind

and I know I'm good and able

I just lay it all out on the table

For all to see

If I fall I do it with the grace of the samurai

So now I practically override every sense

Panic sets in.  

Irrationally attack my character

But the literacy is to deep

You sheep

Your mine now

Now your will is mine to do as I will

I savor this moment
The flavor so good

No more favors Givin

Your mine to control

I've broken you free from this world

And now I abandon you to find your role

Do you understand how I feel when these words take ahold of me.

So strange how it goes with the melody.  

It's almost melancholic how tragic this magic grabs ahold of me.

It's like something took ahold of me.

Like these words arnt my own.  

Like their granted.

From somthin that is greater.

But there's  Not a moment that's mistaken.  

Just a world filled with infinite impossibilitys.  

The spirit of my ancestors flowing through the endless possibilitys.  

Guiding the wisdom of my path through the sorrows that have plagued my family's past.  


Sometimes I feel that theres a spirit watching over me.

Do you understand how I feel when these words take ahold of me.

So strange how it goes with the melody.

  It's almost melancholic how tragic this magic grabs ahold of me.  

It's like something took ahold of me.

Like these words arnt my own.

Like their given.

From somthin greater.  

Not a moment that's mistaken.

  Just a world filled with infinite impossibilitys.  

The spirit of my ancestors flowing through the possibilitys.  

Guiding the wisdom of my path through the sorrows that have plagued my family's past.  

Sometimes I feel that theres a spirit watching over me.

Do you understand how I feel when these words take ahold of me.

So strange how it goes with the melody.

  It's almost melancholic how tragic this magic grabs ahold of me.  

It's like something took ahold of me.

Like these words arnt my own.

Like their given.

From somthin greater.  

Not a moment that's mistaken.

  Just a world filled with infinite impossibilitys.  

The spirit of my ancestors flowing through the possibilitys.  

Guiding the wisdom of my path through the sorrows that have plagued my family's past.  

Sometimes I feel that theres a spirit watching over me.

Its only after the drugs fade that the worries of tomorrow, coupled with regrets from the past, come back to haunt you.  

In order to enjoy your life, you dont need drugs...you dont need alcohol...you only need to embrace the space around you.  Look around, take it all in, and enjoy it.

Accept the things you cannot change and accept that we dont know what tomorrow may bring.  

Just enjoy the moment, embrace it, Love it and set your soul free.

P.s. Drunken Ramblings of a Mad Man.

If I asked you what I meant you'd probably lack my words intent.

I don't flow for you to listen to my words.

I flow in the simple hopes my words reach your soul.

You see no one understands the words as they're spit

They simply bob their heads and nod to the beat

A perfect representation I choose to bestow

About how us humans ignore our souls

It could be filled with sorrow and pain

Or I could simply flow about the sound of the rain

But if I asked you what I meant

You would probably lack my words intent.

So the next time that someone speaks

Find out what it is their soul is trying to teach

I don't flow for you to listen to my words.

I flow in the simple hopes my words reach your soul.

You see no one understands the words as they're spit

They simply bob their heads and nod to the beat

A perfect representation I choose to bestow

About how us humans ignore our souls

It could be filled with sorrow and pain

Or I could simply flow about the sound of the rain

But if I asked you what I meant

You would probably lack my words intent.

So the next time that someone speaks

Find out what it is their soul is trying to teach

I don't flow for you to listen to my words.

I flow in the simple hopes my words reach your soul.

You see no one understands the words as they're spit

They simply bob their heads and nod to the beat

A perfect representation I choose to bestow

About how us humans ignore our souls

It could be filled with sorrow and pain

Or I could simply flow about the sound of the rain

But if I asked you what I meant

You would probably lack my words intent.

So the next time that someone speaks

Find out what it is their soul is trying to teach

I sit in silence.

This Never ending pain.

Where the dark clouds follow.

A never ending rain.

With every thunderous boom.

Its Causing me to shake.

A shivering sadness

From the water on my face.

My voice starts to quiver.

I simply cant keep up with the pace.

You see these thoughts are just racing.

They howl like the wind

Just twirling around

With no way to win

As these tears flow freely.

Staring out into the storm.

Striking deep in my perception

Of how I see the world.

With every bright flash

A different perspective percieved.

The thoughts they are now slowing

And so is the breeze

The thunder it weakens

Just a low grumble now

The soothing smell of the water

I put my knees on the ground

My mind starts to ease

A gentle wind at my back

I put a mask on my face

So that I can head back

To a world that seems broken

Until once again

The storm is awakend

But I know how it ends.

I sit in silence.

This Never ending pain.

Where the dark clouds follow.

A never ending rain.

With every thunderous boom.

Its Causing me to shake.

A shivering sadness

From the water on my face.

My voice starts to quiver.

I simply cant keep up with the pace.

You see these thoughts are just racing.

They howl like the wind

Just twirling around

With no way to win

As these tears flow freely.

Staring out into the storm.

Striking deep in my perception

Of how I see the world.

With every bright flash

A different perspective percieved.

The thoughts they are now slowing

And so is the breeze

The thunder it weakens

Just a low grumble now

The soothing smell of the water

I put my knees on the ground

My mind starts to ease

A gentle wind at my back

I put a mask on my face

So that I can head back

To a world that seems broken

Until once again

The storm is awakend

But I know how it ends.