he woke up on the wrong side of the bed
every day of his life

i’m frankenstein’s masterpiece
constructed from so many components
dad, husband, respiratory therapist
poet, filmmaker, musician, artist
applied physicist, philosopher
bike rider, weight lifter
coffee drinker, reader, television addict
taxpayer, consumer, sucker
emperor of my universe, peon
fearless, fearful, fatalistic
and i know a heap of ***** jokes

when it comes to cartoons
you’re either a disney/mickey freak
or a warner brothers/bugs head
it’s a stones v. beatles thing

do people need new prayers for inspiration?
or is it like classic rock--
the hoary old hits are the best?
might be more meaningful if we all
wrote something for ourselves
but it would have to be stupendous
i doubt we'd be up to it
it's like asking each of us
to compose our own bohemian rhapsody

an 80s tune with zippy synths and chirpy vocs
a song for happier times
you couldn’t sing a tune this bright now
there’s no audience for it

when i was a squirt
i hated winter
and swore that when i grew up
i'd move south
where they never heard of snow
but when i grew up
and saw who lived down south
i said **** it
i'd rather freeze my *** off
than hang with those people
and those people are probably just as glad
that i'm living in an igloo

i'm a genius
i'm a genius
i'm a genius
i'm a genius
i'm a genius
i'm a genius
i'm a genius
i'm a genius

hey, that guy's pretty smart

the election was rigged
the election was rigged