We are all just colors
flying in the solar
system of the dollar
if you care, then holler
at the high and lowly
the beautiful and homely
what's real is more fantastic
than any fiction is

We are seekers guided
by an outrageous deity
from Him we are all hiding
His voice booms and we quake
in fear that we're releasing
like neurotoxins kissing
creating warring babies
that rob us of our bliss

Freedom comes with loving
love repairs our hatred
what we hold is sacred
in cabinets of time
empty them of garbage
of sad and forlorn longing
that always leaves us hanging
to life unsatisfied

Death comes with a price
no kidding, look around
and take some last advice
from every plotted ground
harsh like violent crimes
hideousness hides
and scares a soul half-blind
until courage is found

It's not that we were afraid
of being bright, pigs, cool, or gay
it's worse
we were midliners
middle of the road
monkeys in the middle
the rubber ball always flew above our heads
beyond our outstretched arms
two inches
the span of a universe to a miss
the yearning of touch for us kids
we always ******
medium built
medium length hair
medium length nose
experimenting with tried and true formulaic expressions
set before us by the happy mediums of the art world
full of holes
our brains seeped out
set on fire
then stamped out
one day I dreamt I held the ball in blind fury
the idiot older kid doubled over
wretching on my brown shoes
moment of glory
I punched him in the gut
I clutched the previously elusive orb
wearing a toothy grin
I was no monkey in the middle then

Frank Worm grew large and distinguished.
He was this casket's tribal leader,
in all his white and slimy, bloated glory.
He ate most of his appointed corporal meals in elegance.
Even had first dibs on the poor *******'s brain.
This delicacy made him smart.
And with the votes of Crumble and Weezy,
two of his friends on the New Maggot Council;
he was elected party president.
Then sure enough the whole body was consumed.
And at last, even poor Frank rotted away in his waste.

I don't know what to say
that's the usual case
when speaking about my life
and how I am today

Clearly,  matters of the heart
forever will outweigh
all the lighter trivial stuff
that just gets in the way...

while shallow we all stay

I fumble for the words
that would speak right and true
to call forth some kind blessing
into your world so blue

But I just strike the wrong chords
then fall down on my knees
in desperate, empty pleadings
for  jioy I cannot keep....

I stay out of the deep

What matters most to me in fact,
i may never know
I'm on automatic pilot,
by my fears controlled

When I get to thnking
that i have got a hold
on any real and lasting peace,
the engines fail and so....

tailspinning do I go

If you'll pick me up,
brush the dirt from off of me
I'll remember always dear
and grateful will I be

Grace in days of trouble
it's you I really need
bind my broken heart but first,
teach me how to grieve....

Help me to believe

Help me to receive your care
dare to hope for what's not there
beyond  times so cold and scared
to enter into prayer.....

that love my soul would spare

I'm tired
I'm sipping coffee
bored
I'm watching t.v.
the hours just slip away from me
I veg and rot away....
indoors all day I stay

The house....
is one big ghostland
now.....
that we don't hold hands
but neither of us care to see
each other's face again....
our love is at an end

Dear...
you took off running
back....
to mom and daddy
with everything remotely valuable
except your little dog....
the poodle i still walk

On certain evenings though, my loneliness becomes too much.
And I so miss a home-cooked meal and your feminine touch.
But then our wedding vows resound in my head like a curse.
In sickness or in health unless we get too **** bored first.

I live inside a snow globe
a truly bored and dying soul
these plastic people figurines
dwelling here are just as cold
it seems I've always managed
to not believe what's told
that far beyond these glass walls
exists a warm, green home

And every now and then,
the mighty hand of God extends
to shake my world and thus begin
a cataclysmic spin
the snow flurries commence
to settle on the ground herein
where both of my feet stand frozen
in winter without end.....

my icy tears descend

I do not relate well
I have no relationships
do not relate well
I have no relations
I'm trying to catch my breath
cancelling my membership
from this sad human race
I don't fit in

Here in my frail skin
I find no comfort
nobody sees me
no one comes 'round
I have a history
checkered past misery
perhaps it's best to
be left alone

Sometimes I'm thinking
maybe I'll reach out
it's all well-wishing
nevermind now
who is an ally?
who is a lover?
I have dwelled long here
no hand to hold

And I'm old, yes I'm old
in this unkind school enrolled
taking notes, I suppose
that some day I'll find a hope
to express the longing in my soul
to some kind lady then
and it's not salvation I seek
in a person, but a friend