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Nikita Tshawe Jan 2022
What does death smell like?
Like an infected wound,
Oozing pus,
Infested in fungus?
Like hopelessness,
Like giving up?
Like a burning cigarette?
Like a heart pounding,
In your throat,
From anxiety?
Like *****,
From a hangover,
From drinking the pain away.
Does it smell like,
Fresh sand,
After the one you loved,
Walked away from you.
Does it smell like,
Salty tears running down,
Your face?
Or like green mucus,
Running out of your nose,
From crying?
Maybe it smells,
Like,
A million eggs,
Laid by a large filthy fly.
Or like a badly written poem,
Like this one.
Or like walking in to the office,
Of the job you despise.
Maybe it smells like rotten fruits,
From the tree of your failed success.
Or like the small apartment you live in,
That you resent,
And hardly deep clean.
I bet death smells like,
The awful ***,
From one night stands.
Or like blood,
From a bad period.
Or like lung cancer.
Diabetes.
Depression.
Bird flu.
I bet death smells like death.
Nikita Tshawe Mar 2023
If natural disaster was to call.
And we were all to fall.
Will there be anyone left?
To log into our phones,
And read our unposted;
Thoughts.
Poems.
Playlist songs.
Prayers.
Notes.
To do lists.
Bucket lists.
Wishlists.
Uncleared shopping carts.
Liked videos.
Saved videos.
Favorite videos.
Watch later.
Retweeted.
Loved.
Reposted.
Unfiltered pictures.
DIY projects.
Ten minute crafts.
Absolute must haves.
Spend the day with mes.
Get ready with mes.
Food orders.
Takealot orders.
Amazon orders.
Day in the life.
What I feed my dog in a day.
What I eat in a day.
Daily vlogs.
Daily blogs.
Unread texts.
Check ins.
Drafts.
Downloads.
Watch lists.
Google history.
Unread emails.
Tinder matches.
Netflix must watch.
Gen Z versus millenials.
Private subscriptions.
And think to themselves,
What the actual f**k?
What happened to us?
What has the world become?
Personally,
I hope he writes the new Bible.
What would God think?
Nikita Tshawe Jun 2020
What hurts me most
Is not that you disappointed me
Or that you left at my worst
What hurts most is that I will never see you again
Talk to you again
See you smile
Hold you for a while
It's astonishing
After everything you did so vile
I still miss you
I still need you
I still want you
I still love you
Plenty fish in the sea but I don't want to go fishing
It's you I miss
It's you I need
It's you I want
It's you I love
Our love was different
It was magnificent
Or so I thought
But now I'm starting to doubt
Who
Nikita Tshawe Aug 2023
Who
Who is going to care for my heart?
Who is going to catch me when I fall?
Who will wipe my tears away?
Who will laugh with me?
Who will love me?
Dear God,
Why have you left me
All alone?
With no one.
But myself.
Who is going to love me?
Nikita Tshawe Nov 2022
I'm going insane.
I'm searching his name,
Surname,
Nickname,
On every platform.
Whatsapp.
LinkedIn.
Facebook.
Twitter.
Instagram.
Tiktok.
YouTube.
Who is he?
What does he like?
All I have is his name.
I want to know him.
I have to know him.
I want to marry him.
What is his handle?
Why is his account private?
What did he repost?
Where did he check in?
What did he retweet?
What did he like?
What did he react to?
Is he on Tinder?
Is he even on social media?
Just want to find out if him and I,
Are meant to be?
This might be love.
I have to find him.
It's not stalking.
It's online research.
Nikita Tshawe Jan 2020
Let me sing you my favorite song
Let me recite you my favorite poem
You can have the best part of me
Let me give you my all

Let me paint you in my favorite colors
Let me cook you my favorite dish
You're my favorite person
You're my favorite feeling

Let me tell you my favorite story
Let me fix you my favorite drink
Let me read you my favorite book
You're my favorite boy

You're my favorite feeling
Let me wear my favorite clothes
Let's drive to my favorite place
Let me sing you my favorite melody

Let me write you my favorite poem
Let me be your favorite girl
You're my favorite face
You're my favorite kiss

I miss you when you're out of town
You're my favorite to be around
Your voice is my favorite
You are my favorite dream
Nikita Tshawe Nov 2021
you said you loved me,
i heard you say it.
you said you cared for me,
i heard you say it.

where are you going?
why are you leaving?
have you had enough of my loving?
come back here, don't you hear me screaming?

you see me crying,
yet you still choose to walk away from me.
don't you see me trying?
is this what it's come to be?

not going to ask you again,
where do you think you're going?
i can't describe this pain.
i can't comprehend this feeling.

this feeling, it is foreign.
i thought we were meant to be.
i missed everything, any sign.
tell me that this isn't us, it isn't me!

tell me that i'm dreaming.
this can't be happening.
you are not leaving.
tell me i'm imagining.

it's in my head, it's all in my head.
you are here to stay,
unless i am dead,
we are forever and a day.

you said you loved me,
i heard you say it.
you said you cared for me,
i heard you say it.

look me in the eye.
and tell me that we are going to be alright.
tell me, that this is all a lie.
please, hold me tight.

you can't leave.
not this way,
i find this hard to believe.
please stay.

i need you.
only you.
it's always been you.
i've always been true.

don't you care for me anymore?
i'll change, i'll be better.
let's go back to how it was before.
only you and i matter.

she will never love you like i can.
i'd swallow the river for you.
you are my man.
i'd write a million songs for you.

you need me.
i know that you do.
you care for me.
i can see that you really do.

you said you loved me,
i heard you say it.
you said you cared for me,
i heard you say it.

— The End —