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Nikki Tshawe Jul 2019
I forgive you for yesterday.
For the day before today.
For the years before this one.
For all the years that have gone.
I want you to know that it's all well.
The past is not for us to dwell.
You have made some mistakes.
But it's all sweet cakes.
Your past will never define you.
Your future is right in front of you.
Forget all you have done wrong.
Sing a happy cheerful song.
Find peace and freedom.
The world is your kingdom.
You are fit to reign.
Dance through the rain .
You are a queen and nothing less.
You are forgiven for all the mess.
We learn and we grow. That's how it goes.
Smile you beautiful rose.
You are forgiven.
Appreciate the life you were given.
Don't forget to live.
Don't forget to forgive.

Love.
Me.
Nikki Tshawe Jul 2019
Well here we are, I forgive you.
You never said you're sorry but I forgive you.
I accept the apology I never heard from you.
With this I take back my all strengths.
I have gone through great lengths.
To be able to say this to you here and now.
I've made peace with it somehow,
How you left without reason.
It's a new day. A new season.
So wherever you go,
I want you to know
That I hate you no more.
I mean this from my core.
Fly like a bird you are free to go.
Wherever it is you decide to go,
Please don't ever think to come back.
Stay far away from my track.
Nikki Tshawe Jul 2019
Don't try to save me, let me burn.
The hard way is how I have to learn.
I don't need your help, leave me to suffer.
I tell the truth, I am no bluffer.
The truth is that I am being haunted.
The spirits have me daunted.
I am chased by the things of the night.
Sadly, I have lost the fight.
Well truthfully, I gave in to the shadow.
I am being held against my will down below.
They forced me to abide.
They locked me deep inside.
Took everything I held dear.
Left me with nothing but trembling fear.
Don't try to save me, let them have me.
Let them have their way with me.
Once they are done with me I will be brand new.
Many won't understand this, only a few.
They want me because I am the called one.
I am undeniably the chosen one.
Nikki Tshawe Jul 2019
Dear depression - You and your friend anxiety.
You have no power over me, and my sanity.
Do you know how happy I am when you fail to show?
Oh! I wish you would know.
How complete my life is without your unwanted baggage!
But somehow you always creep up on me, don't you? You savage!
Well, I put my foot down today!
You've had your way with me, but that was yesterday!
I will outlive you.
I will crush you.
You have no place here in my heart.
Remove yourself from my life, you filthy dirt.
No more shall you make me feel small and unworthy.
From now on, I will be free and healthy.
No more of your sad, sad feelings.
No more of your evil, evil dealings.
I choose to be free!
I choose to be me!
Get away from me, why don't you?
I am more valuable than what you make it seem true.
I am no failure. I am no quiter.
I am a survivor. I am a true fighter.
I have seen you take lives from their beloved.
But here with me you are over powered.
Listen when I say your days are numbered.
You have no power here!
I wish to make this crystal clear!
So please pack all your things and go.
I don't want to feel you in my space anymore!
I hate the way that you make me feel.
How much more of me do you want to steal?
You nasy parasite.
Please get out of my sight!
I'd give anything to see you dead and burried.
My friends and family out here worried.
Because of you and your friend anxiety.
I want my life back, along with my sanity.
Farewell depression.
Till we never meet again!
Nikki Tshawe Jul 2019
Stripped off my identity
Taken from my own sanity
Is this a rebirth?
Cause it feels more like death
Who am I?
What am I?
My spirit has too grown weary
My heart too heavy to carry
Soul drifring far away into despair
This doesn't seem fair
Where is my sun light?
I have lost my own sight
Holding on with the tip of my finger
How much longer will my essence linger
In this dark, cold dwelling
I long for smooth sailing
For peace and serenity
I want my identity along with my sanity
Nikki Tshawe Jul 2019
Dead inside. I feel nothing
Nothing but self loathing
My heart is ice cold
I watch the darkness unfold
My soul is dead
Emptiness is my daily bread
Happiness is a distant thought
My hatred is self taught
I despise life
Slit my throat with a knife
And I will feel pain no more
I have nothing to live for
I am dead inside
No where left to hide
I am dead inside
Nikki Tshawe Jul 2019
My hatred for you consumes me.
I hate you for what you did to me.
It is not just what you did,
It is how you did what you did.
As much as I can try to understand why you had to.
The way that it broke me is the reason I can't forgive you.
But me not being able to forgive me feeds on my soul.
The way that you ended things was foul.
You said that your love for me had diminished.
Those words had my heart and my whole being finished.
It was as if you ripped me apart.
I am still picking up the pieces of my heart.
The ones that you left behind.
I still can't fathom this in my mind.
You left me. Broken pieces and all.
Tears falling down my face and all.
You broke me. All the love and loyalty I gave.
I had no choice left but to cave,
To this sudden decision you had made.
How did your love for me just fade?
Was it ever there to begin with?
Or was your love for me just a myth?
You ended me. As much as I hate to admit it,
You took everything from me and left me in a dark pit,
A dark pit of despair and guilt.
Everything we had built,
Had crashed in front of my eyes.
All this because of your lies,
Your lies about loving me forever.
I watched that get washed in the river.
It is like you were even there.
I regret the day I met you with every shed tear.
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