For the first time that I can remember I am very conscious of my breath
My heart rate is elevated and my mind irrational
I feel the moisture growing in the palm of my hands
I looks down and as I do it takes all my will power not to look up
A nervous energy in my gut causing me to involuntarily hold my stomach tight
A feeling of excitement and then immediately dread that this moment will pass
The courage builds inside me
I raise my head to catch your eye again but you are gone, lost to me forever.