John "Johnny Panic" Rockefeller (1926-1962, 1973-present) is the reanimated corpse of Marilyn Monroe reconstituted with ape DNA. He has been included in exactly none textbooks, …

Jennifer Phox is a professor emerita of poetry at Cambridge University's sister campus, United States College. She is the holder of 14 PhD's from DeVry, …

Kitty Parson was born at home in an unextraordinary ranch house in the Pacific Northwest. After Kitty was kidnapped at a young age, her mother …

Onkel Hva was born in a mud hut in Teveldal, Norway in 1948. His parents were illiterate potato farmers, and little Hva had to teach …

Anika Festrog (1977-present) is a Hungarian refugee. She fled from behind the Iron Curtain nation, but it was five years after the Cold War was …

Doktor Howl (1925-present) is the last survivor of the Old Bohemians Club, and is considered a rather unexceptional poet, who should probably remove his irons …