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Oct 21 · 20
if i do or if i don't
they tell you that life has been predetermined, that your story has been written already.
then what if everything i'm doing is useless, and i'm being mocked by many.
what if i'm working extremely hard and making promises but i'm fated with a bad ending
what if i plan all these things and begin fulfilling them one by one but i'm just pretending

we don't know how our story will end, but if it was decided that you would end up in the hospital, why try?
why spare the time and mislead people with the thoughts that you could do amazing things and still watch your mother cry?
if it was written in your story to end up with a bad fate.
there's realistically nothing you can do that will change it, it's a bit too late.

so if i do something good or bad,it doesn't matter, i'm *******
if it was supposed to be, it would be, because my future has been brewed.
if i don't do something bad, it doesn't make me a hero
in the end, i still end up with an ill-fated ending, staring out of this soulless window.

honestly, we really do not know. we'll only find out when our time has come.
until our chest settles down completely and our heart stops playing the drum.
and we'll find out then and there, with everybody else.
until you found out that everything you did was meaningful or meaningless, after your final farewell.
Oct 21 · 31
my heart, an egg
my heart, the perfectly shaped egg
oh dear, hear me out, would you?
i can explain it, everything, for you
it's a philosophy only one can understand, will you?

i'm not like the rest
i used to want glasses, freckles and even braces
i use to rock back and forth like i was in a movie
at some point, even wanted to switch races

i use to climb the tree searching for the apple
i use to roam the streets in search of treasure
now the fire has been extinguished, there's no more crackle
none to call home, only issues and trouble to tackle

im insensitively sensitive, my heart, an egg
my whole life is a paradox, inconsequently
the softest at the core, basically liquid inside
but getting through, planets and asteroids will have to collide
and inside, there's something brewing, and building, and forming
like a chicken giving birth to it's chick, its transforming
and soon, it will break through the barriers
and hatred will be swarming

that's how you would remember me, that's the sad part
so i warn you now, not to overstep
care and nurture me, protect my heart and tread lightly, be cool
cause im a ticking time bomb, tick tick tick and trust me, you should have no intention of being around for the boom

what good does it do if my heart is an egg, but i'm surrounded with sharp utensils
how does it make anything better if my tongue has all the power and my heart has to deal with the aftermath
how does my brain even play a role when it knows what's going on and does nothing
doesn't provide a path, to success
doesn't enable me to laugh in times of stress

the heat is rising, and like an egg, i feel my heart getting more solid, like a boiled egg
i dont know who is in control of the temperature but i wont beg
i'll stand up straight, head up and keep smiling
because the tension is rising, the right things, nobody's buying
im failing but baby im trying
im seeing way too many souls flying, gliding in azure sky
there's too many people lying, oh my
there it is
there
breakfast is served.
Oct 21 · 16
take my breath
so what if i did?
what would you do, what did you do?
you watched me self destruct, cave in from the bottom, vanish.
i've been blamed for being a coward, but believe me, i was banished.

with every step, a growing rift tears between.
a quiet space, infinitely small. a solitary shore.
in silent whispers and loud glares, love becomes unseen.
your eyes revert to how they were before they met mine.
as echoes fade, our voices fall with the sun and speak no more.

the laughter we once shared softly quiets, like petals from roses gliding through the wind.
so as i step forward, a somber feeling of acceptance, my feelings suprisingly do not rescind.
that slight, but blinding light has vanished from your eye.
as life continues, as does the cycle. whatever lives must eventually die.

farewell love, it was good while it lasted, although not physical, this is our final embrace.
i let you go, you are set free. you belong to the world once more.
but know this, there would've been a spot for you in the chambers of my heart forever, in time and space.
as my breath quiets down, my body runs cold, remember i love you always. you can visit me, you still have the keys to my door.
after the final breath, the silence of nothingness.
lies the physical husk, the shell of nobody less.
and many come around to pay attention to the deceased.
almost as if the soul is brand new and life has been released.

they recall memories of the one, hold them in high regard, lifting them.
like a new born, held in the air by the old nurse, crying profusely while connected by stem.
oh, how beautiful life is, what they have become.
a superstar in their own right and all of a sudden, everyone has all the wisdom.
they know.. i promise they know.
they weren't around but they still saw them grow.

most only know the name of the deceased, by name and picture.
they truly do not know how to feel, sad or comforting to the sad, their emotions a mixture.
so they try to fabricate tears, and look as sad as they possibly can
and respect their name, mention it as much as they can and look like their biggest fan

truthfully, they left more of an impact now than when they were still with us, unfortunately it was fate.
because humans do not care about anybody until life has to highlight them, but then it is too late.
the angels will sing and the soul will be lifted, to fly high.
it's sad but most people's lives only begin after they die.

— The End —