instinctive consumption of vitamin C
from bright light to dim light - ever finding darkness.
"i wonder where hes gone?" questioned always,
never let us go. always let you go.
pondering quandries and
"i can never let it go."
pondering quandries and
"my words never fit."
hearing of Ski-Masks,
a final resort for the overwhelmed.

this will be an off the chest one,
a long one,
a crazy (and) derisive one for
we
who once were
i
are now foregone.

we sit here
writing -
startled by the addition of
LOUD
music(?) to my library;
not my taste -
pink floyd
leaks through my
head phones from
the coffee shop speakers.
tea scalded tongue,
she did
warn me,
did she...

- a break,
thats where we
find
ourselves and
wondering what will come
of the fu-
tu-
re
furthur out from
now?

we quiet now,
find ourselves
lulled through
into
another plane
of which -
break end.

this year -
bitter winds find
necessitation in
her
fixation -
as last year
as next year,
til time
cedes.

we write with open head
and fluid mental
projection,
a reality
created
from each of ours
and one into
the next;
'our universe is
vast'
some cry,
of course we
know
it is.

tea no longer
scalds
(
to burn
the flesh away
)
as twangy
guitar follows
snappy snare,
tap tap
tip
tap,
blues wail
away.

- - - to take a ****
to take a cigarette
to take a lover - - -

lover missed,
though
so did the
****;
currents retain
fluidity.

we're done.

the smell of a wood fire drifts and i quaf in attempt of reprieve. my mind wanders to a childhood long since idolized. long since memorialized. long since fallacized. a time when i ran rampant among the trees and found myself King of the land, too young to have yet been owned by the land i reigned over.   i shot arrows through the sky in attempts to **** the sun and rule the dawn. never was i asked, nor did i ask, what made me believe i could do it.    i did because i could.    to earth i came, surrounded in wilderness. surrounded in reality. body shivering as darkness crept the land. freedom supplanting comfort.    companion found, guide through the long darkness. a wolf of lesser origins but equal in spirit to child-King. his quest not for the sun, but its Mistress instead. a quest unending.    stripped of innecessities - child-King - bare as the sun evanesces.    through the forest i ran, wolf by side. ran until air no longer satiated muscles, until i fell upon the ground to rest.    rising, sun awash skin, i stood naked in my truth. the sun, it taunts.  it glares, lingering in pinnacle. constant reminder of the coming long darkness. of the restless forests. of the jagged horrors to stir.

the waters have smoothed due to ebbing
and we know they will swell again
and become turbulent in their time.

and this foreshore will be consumed by Man,
no less consumed by that which drives him.
utilization, degradation, cheap labor cost.

Vonnegut -
      the ******* -
implanted within my
          mind
        a concept -
           the concept -
       of time being illusory
          in such blunt words
                     that i could
          not make sense
       of them until now.

                                    Vonnegut -
                                             the ******* -
                                       stories of
                                       writing stories of
                                            Dresden -
                           is Billy alive these days?

                                                          ­         Vonnegut -
                                                               ­             you ******* -
                                                             your words are
                                                             ­     psychomimetic.
                                             ­     how do you sleep at night
                                                           ­        knowing your words
                                                          g­et people high?

two tough weeks ahead,
slept all day, the night -
time to finish off the schnapps.

H8412

dissipation as fast as the congregation --
restore us to sanity with a rather insane concept.
remove our shortcomings and
may we would grow no taller
nor how could we grow any smaller?
who are we to judge ourselves,
and who are they to dictate
the exact nature of our wrongs?