My smile shrouds the many wounds inflicted upon mine heart

I shall continue to fight the good fight in this

My lifelong struggle to rise above in this profession I thought for many moons to be a lost art.

I am a Father...

You claim
To know his name
Murdered many
In his name
Led the sheep
To the slaughter
In his name
Demanded money
From the poor
In his name
Mask the Truth
Live lavishly
In his name
Preach lies
To control and confuse
In his name
Speak in tongues
And edify only yourself
In his name
Pray one day
You fall to your knees
In his name
You repent for
Giving false testimony
In his name
You realize that all
He wanted was you to trust
In his name
Understand that he wanted
Us to have true faith
In his name
Learn that you should
Have done good works
In his name
Victory was only certain
For those put their hopes
In his name
For oppresing the meek
You will be held accountable
In his name
Today you still spread
Deceitful lies
As you continue to deny
That the church
Is the people
It is you
It is I
Not the stone temple
You have built
To house the wealth
You have amassed
Through these years that have passed
Take heed
For in the
End of days
You will be called
To explain
How one so wicked
Could ever rightfully claim
He was worthy
Of even speaking
His name...

Here I stand
Tall and strong in all my splendor
Where the white sands converge with the warm waters
In a place that affords the kind of bliss most hope to remember

I have witnessed the sunrise
Have stood in awe of the sunset
Some thought they would soon see my demise
During so many trying times I cannot seem to quite forget

On the horizon I saw the coming of many a storm
Braced myself for the worst
Waves come violenty crashing against me with waters so warm
Unwelcome but familiar this storm is not my first

Winds enraged mercilessly battering
I bend
My tall strong frame close to breaking is far from flattering
Yet after the storm passes I still stand as many don't seem to comprehend

My roots run quite deep
Deep into this world I so very love
Here I stand firm awaiting the rise of the sun as I look forward to dancing in the breeze of a night sky as my soul needs not any sleep
For those who were certain that I would finally give in to the storm
I know not what you speak of

I bend
I don't break
I hold on no matter what life my way shall send
I bend
For I have learned stand again no matter what it may take.

The day this world was gifted with your existence
Fortune had passed me by
I was not the first man to hold you
Nor did I hear your first cry

I don't contemplate it much
I would much rather forget
While I struggle to accept that it was out of my control
For it is the one thing I regret

I forget
It was simply not I who greeted you into this life
After he chose to walk away from you
Your mother became my wife

The universe finally noticed me
You were so very little when you first looked me in the eye
I picked you up in my arms and just held you
I promised to be the best father I could be to you until the day I die

Over the years I forget
Because the bond we share is strong
You are my son and I your father
Who will ever dare say that we are wrong

Every milestone in your life is engrained in my heart
I've kissed you good night, tucked you in, and even healed your scars
And now although you have become a quite the responsible young man
I am here for you always and I will never be to far

I forget that I was not there in the very beginning
You will never imagine how much I wish that the privilege of being there was mine to be had
But know forever that I will never walk away from you because you chose to call me DAD....

This journey ever changing
Countless twists and endless turns
So many of us give up the struggle
We still have so much to learn

This life has yet to be easy
Obstacles come and go
Enough tears to form a river of hope
Sweet waters flow through streams we have yet to know

Tired of simply treading water
Chasing dreams that fade away
Reaching out with empty palms
Waiting for my share of that better day

Holding on to those we love
Together we get past the pain
Open up your heart
Shelter someone through their rain

Meet me at the crossroads
Take my hand and walk with me
Better days just off the horizon
A lucid dream of how all could be...

When the sky begins to fade
My eyes find the darkness and
This beating heart halts,
The sound of nothingness takes with it
Everything we never had the chance to say.
Just when I cease to be,
Promise that you won't
Kiss me...

When the cold is upon me,
This pulse that once quickened at the very sound of your voice
Now echoes in a space where you can't follow.
When all I know ceases to be
Just hold my hand-
Don't   kiss me

When we become a memory-
Just when my soul begins that journey
For which none of us prepare,
It would be eternally cruel
To know I had no choice.
Returning to your lips
Is but a hopeful wish.
If you love me,
Understand how that would
**** me,  once more.

Promise that you won't
Kiss me;
I could not bear
The thought of
Never returning
To the tenderness
Of your rose colored
Lips;
Promise.....

It took me quite
a number of years to
unlearn all of the
macho *******
that in my first
20 years of life
made me believe
I fully understood what
it meant to be a man.
To comprehend what
the true essence
of what it truly means
to be a man,
I had to search deep
within me;
it was there that I learned
that in order to be
a good man,
one must first embrace
the beauty of
simply being
Hu  man.