Go Find yourself.
Find you.

I hope you're Finding happy.

Get your Finding life together.
Get Found.

I'm not writing for you,
you reader.
How could I?

I'm not writing to prove
myself.  I know already.

I'm only writing.  

To tell the pen to
work.  To tell the cursor
to never blink a breath.
To tell something I cannot
tell the disappointed clerk,
or disillusioned worker,
or disheartened lover.

To write.  To add
permanence to an
otherwise irretrievable
thought that will be lost,
I know it will,
like the passion,
the illusion,
the heart.

It's the ship of
she, and she, and she
that I need to steady.
But I am only this one man,
and father to all three.

And I'm only half sure
I'm half right
half the time.  But
she, and she, and she- trust me.
Trust me, they do.  
   I see it in their eyes
                    their smiles
                    their sleep.

And I'm only thinking about
what happened today
and guessing about tomorrow. But still
they love me.  I feel she, she, and she
always will.  

And I feel the weight of this steady,
though heavy and I'll never hold.  
And the she, and the she, and the she, of ships
will trust in the things they're told.  

But how do you steady the she and she,
And the she she'll grow to be?
Whoever never taught me
owes me an explanation.

I'll steady her the best I can,
and know at the very least,
the ships of she, and she, and she
will get the best of me.

I watched you silly-walk.
Your legs stretched thin,
          Your body a jumble
of comic-meets-actress-meets-
kid.

I watched you silly-walk.
All seven years of you.
          I sat. watch
ing, love
ing, hope
ing that you'd look over.

I watched you silly-walk
and wondered why I'd never
tried that.  Fearing I'd
lost my silly-walkedness
to due dates and a long commute,
or the grindstone never ending,
or forgetting that the stars burn
out eventually-
and I might want to look up and
see them shine.

I want to watch you silly-walk.
Again.

It's almost each day that I
wonder:
did something happen?

Are they gone?  Am I alone?

It's almost each day that I
wonder:
who will go first?

Would you date? Could I live?

It's almost each day that I
wonder:
Am I closer than I know?

This week? Next year?

But it's almost each day
that I:
think of tomorrow, plan
for my retirement, nap
away an afternoon, buy
enough groceries for the
week, tell myself I'll see
them later, forget to say
goodbye- I love you.  

It's almost each day that I
forget so much.

Blah blah blah....
Love.

Blah blah blah...
Love.

Love love love...
Blah.

Move easy.  Breathe easy.
Be. easy.

Be the grain of sand, the one
man band, the nail that stands.

Be a way of life, find joy in strife,
know the loss in Might.

Be the as you are, right when you are,
just where you are.

So the chafing, the verbal strafing,
the work of making... becomes valued.

So the hating, the double stating,
the life frustrating- ends.


So be.  Move...