How could you not look into my eyes and tell me its not me anymore
The one you love and care for
The one you adore and cant live without
The one you've always known
The one you trust
The one you've been looking for

How can you not be usual brave person I knew
The honest and real
The fierce and bold

How could you instantly become the reality behind those nightmares, those sleepless nights
The one who left
The one who was loved more than anyone else
The one who broke and teared my heart into pieces

How could you be the reason behind those sad thoughts in my head without me realizing it would've been you and it has always been you

How could you shatter every piece you picked of me
And leave me as if I wasn't yours

How could you just walk away and let go
How could you hurt me in your absence while someone else is present

How could you be all those and still be the one I'll always love

How could you

I don't know how to start with this whole thing
I know I somehow tainted your pure trust
I lied, not cheated
I'm not here to justify or defend what had happened
I'm not here to tell you one of my uncountable lies
I'm here to prove that one mistake won't define what our future holds
I'm here to accept the fact that I made a mistake, made you mad for a day and made you think I was with someone else when I'm not
I'm here
To say that I never wanted anyone but you
To say sorry for telling a lie
Sorry for all that I've done wrong and all the things you hate about me
Just, sorry.
I'm very sorry.
I'm not an apologetic person, but if you'll just let me do this.
Really, I'm sorry and I'd do anything to bring back your trust.

I walked to see a road wc can be attributed to a path or a destination
A retreating form of a vehicle
A poor pup on the side walk
Muddy grounds
Trees
Sunlight
Umbrella
Drizzle
I could write a line, a verse or a stanza
Idk I just looked into the gray skies and felt like I must write this
A thought came into my mind during my journey
The fact that the sunlight is shining while it's raining must be something
Anyway, I have my umbrella
To protect me from whatever the trip might bring
The bright sunlight is blinding
The heat touched my skin
It is of course hot but its good for my skin so I didn't bother shifting the umbrella on its direction
But then I felt something cold
A drop of water I guess
Though I'm not sure
I looked everywhere
And true enough its raining
No, drizzling
A drizzle is different from rain just like pour to sprinkle
And the realization hit me
I didn't mind the sun's heat although it can burn me
Tolerance
Instead I used my umbrella to protect me from the drizzle
I looked above to see the gray skies and dying tree
Melancholy
Hope
Life is all about a balance of tolerance and defense
Pain and suffering, weakness
Shall determine one's threshold
Whilst struggle is inevitable
Success is a must
No matter what the journey may bring, as long as I'm strong
I can.

Yes, I am a woman of emotion
Of pain and sadness
Of melancholic happiness
Of contradicting ideas
Of flaws
A woman made
Of dark and of light
Of shadows and of defined
Of verses and of lines
I let out a sigh
Of moods that were stopped
Of everything not allowed
For me not to feel
For me to conceal
To accept the the truth
That I am not healed