He tells himself that one day
he’ll be with the woman that he loves
but he will have to fix himself first.
He leaves her shaking on the bathroom floor
because he can’t stop his own hands from trembling
and he doesn’t think he’s capable
of picking up all of her broken pieces
when he is still slicing open his fingertips
trying to clean up his own mess.
His story isn’t one you would tell your children
because it isn’t one that ends happily.
Years later her long hair still appears in his dreams
and he can’t bring himself to listen to his favorite music anymore
because he swears he can hear her laughter in every tune.
He buries himself in other girls
whose eyes don’t shine nearly as brightly as hers used to
and he drinks whiskey every night
in the hopes of forgetting her name,
but he is afraid he will end up forgetting his own first.

I did the thing I'm not supposed to do again
He said he'd leave if I did it again
Well I did it again
And maybe he won't find out again
But he will leave again
He'll find another lame excuse to leave again
I'm falling apart again
Thrown on the floor again
Breaking down again
I'm drowning again
Please don't leave me again
I can't take this again
He's gone again

As uncompromising and unfaltering as Kubrick
he shook and hung his head
he sighed a question
'what do you know about the temperature change'

even the sparrow wants a taste of dark
in that coalblack shadow.
filter the moonbeams and put a check on your heart
you know where you must start.

in the mirror, through the mirror
through the Looking Glass, Alice,
yes to nourishing carrots
no to drugs and stay in school.