When your heart stops beating, or loses its ability to pump blood to itself
the doctors put in a stent. And so, as pieces of your own self-sustaining
***** go to die, they are replaced by more and more
latticework. These tiny structures allow you to breathe, yes
they allow you to keep yourself alive. But what do you do
when pieces of your own sacred heart no longer belong to yourself
and they no longer pump blood the way they were born for
and no one told you that survival would come at the price
of everything that made you who you are- that this pointless
synthetic division would leave you a cold restless machinery
because you were scared, a little bit, too scared to be honest with yourself
too scared to even know you were scared so you stopped your heart
from pumping itself and gave the job to something or someone else
you made your heart a building, a high tower from which you cannot escape
rather than the core of who you are, it becomes a prison put in place
cement and steel blocks to keep you safe from the dragon but
the true danger is what became of you, you who gave up everything
to keep yourself alive, you whose heart no longer pumps blood
like a living, breathing human who shouts and screams and loves
whose heart no longer means what Aristotle and Jesus Christ said it means,
you whose heart now does its job, and that job only. You're me.

Maybe - finally - I'm releasing the voice I've kept inside.

so we'll ******* the neighbors
in a place that feels the tears
the place you lose your fears
yeah, reckless behavior.

It's so hard to forgive someone-
it's hard even to know what forgiveness is
should I agree that the wrong was necessary
should I sympathize with the wrongdoer
should I forget it ever happened
should I act as if it didn't
should I say something to you
I don't know. I don't know. All I know is when
I said, "I forgive you," even alone so no one heard,
a little piece of my heart unclenched,
a little shackle round my veins was let loose
and I knew then that when I said, "I forgive you,"
it was a better way of saying "I love you" and I knew that
the locks and loops holding me back were tied together
with my ability to forgive myself. I'm glad I saw this through.

Will it take your breath?
Will it make you burn?

I'm not here on this earth for self advancement, for money, fame, good looks
for friends, even-
those things don't last anyway.
I'm here to love, to console the poor and lowly,
to stand on my own two feet and do what God asked of me
to welcome all with open arms
to expect nothing in return
to seek not to burn bridges and to tie my loyalties to my Father
and through Him, all my neighbors
to look kindly on people and smile often,
to bring joy, to develop my character, to weep where tears are needed
and shout when shouting is called for
to make a change in the hearts of those I encounter
to follow my own heart when it chases God
and abandon it when it leads me astray.
I will not apologize for this. I will not apologize for who the Lord
has called me to be. I will not cater to the whims of people
that expect less of me. I am more than that. I will be more than that.

some part of me has always known.

I'm down to my skin and bone
and my mommy, she can't put down the phone
and stop asking how I'm doing all alone, alone
But the truth is the stars are falling, ma
and the wolves are out, quit calling, ma
and my home has never felt this far.

But all this driving is driving me crazy
and all this moving is proving to get the best of me
And I've been trying to hide it but lately
every time I think I'm better
picking my head up, getting nowhere.

The LORD is the one who goes ahead of you; He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.