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the disappeared Jun 2016
I owe no explanations
I need not justify my worth

I love when I feel and
I feel when I love

I will not apologize

For creating an ocean at my feet
For touching the sky with my eyes

I am a tree, growing from
every direction
Loosing leaves from nesting birds,
Still breathing.


So I will not justify my worth.
the disappeared Feb 2016
The cosmic process
of spaghettification
is real.

Going through a black hole causes
an object to elongate
and stretch.

This phenomena makes the individual
observe a never ending edge
in the distance.

To an observer, they are infinitely stretched.
Until they don't care anymore and turn away.

And the individual just keep wishing
for the ultimate simplification
the disappeared Feb 2014
so much to say
violence in head
everyday, I
     say something stupid instead

So much to say
bracing the salt-waves
that skin me more red
       I bend over laughing because I'm so brave
the disappeared Jan 2014
#2
Nope

I say, flipping a table
**** this, *******
I scream. How
can no one hear this.

Hallowed grounds
****, hollow sounds

Fighting in my head
              biting till I'm dead

hah, its confusing.
No one tells you're off
until you're off, saying **** again

And then I know its bad.
I'm here again. Right here. URL

writing to convince myself that
yep, I deserve to love myself
         yep, that's a secret, secret goal.
the disappeared Jan 2014
I feel trapped
No, not even that
Just hollow
a brick wall, crumbling
inside

I'm not sure when the line
was drawn.
When I didn't get better anymore
truly. When did
it start *insert proper preposition: (over) (again)
When I seemed better
but everything
catches up
and I'm left ******* in air
rapidly. again.

Its not like I can forget
ironic, since I did. for months. the brain injury is tricky. it has a way of trailing along, and then you
forget. maybe

I can say I'm alone
but it doesn't matter
                                        [pretending, oh yes.]
that no one ever knows

Maybe its the ******* A's I get
and the **** compliments I receive.

but it is worthless

I'm so far
embedded
I just accept it
and forget it as easily
as, "hey, whats up"
the disappeared Aug 2013
Today is the day
I couldn't wait
for it to never come.

And here I am.
And here it is.
the disappeared Apr 2013
She was caught in the crossfire
Holding the trigger
Undone, panicked eyes; she was sliced by a wire
She folded and could not move a finger.

Relapsed, she was a broken liar
Each time she faded, she faded faster
Underneath, masqueraded, she was a fighter
But inside, where she hides, she felt herself shatter.

It was like waking up from a dream, bleary eyed and breathless.
Shielding her eyes, she stood there, no longer picking her seams
She had defeated her sleepless dependence
Her mind may have fooled her, but she was no longer a machine

For a time, it became her, changed her, fought her heart out
But when she surfaced, she breathed, and there wasn’t a doubt.
school project, loosely a shakespearean sonnet.
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